My acne story begins way back in high school. It was moderate, persistent acne that I was dealing with. I never cared too much about my acne, popping my pimples frequently. I thought it was the kind of thing that comes and goes. My freshman year of college, I had the same mentality.

It wasn't until my sophomore year when I went through a very tough time with my now ex-girlfriend. The break up was very tough on me, but I saw it as an opportunity to change and better myself. I realized that I didn't want acne anymore. Without doing much research on the best ways to treat acne, I looked for the quick and easiest way to get rid of these spots. I decided that laser therapy was the best route. The laser treatments were expensive, costing around $2500. The doctor at the laser clinic also prescribed me duac, differin and antibiotics. I was on the laser treatment/prescriptions for about 5-6 months. My acne actually cleared up in the that timespan pretty nicely to the point where it was acceptable, but it was no where near 100%. I'd probably say that it was around 70% clear. At this time, I started seeing and talking to a new girl.

While things seemed like they were looking up, I was in for one long ride. About a year ago from this date, my acne got to the point where it was severe. Personally, I'm convinced that it was from being off the antibiotics for 2 months. This was a very depressing time for me because it felt like my 6-7 months of hardwork went down the drain on top of my terrible terrible acne (read some of my previous posts to get a sense of how I was feeling). I had begun dating a new girl and I honestly wanted a super quick solution. I talked to my mom and I asked her if I could go through another $1700 worth of laser treatments. She agreed, although I felt bad asking her for more money.

Second semester came and the laser treatment really didn't do much. The cysts did go down a fair amount from going back on antibiotics and topicals, but I was left with some really nasty post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation. I was totally embarrassed about how red my face was, so I used tinted moisturizer. It worked well in covering the redness up, but it was noticeable. People knew but I thought it was the best route at the time. I was so particular of my face, looking in the mirror every few seconds and spending a good 1.5 hours with my regimen. My girlfriend was great, she never ever said a thing.

As the year ended my acne calmed down dramatically, but I still had pimples. I had been waiting for the school year to end because I knew I was going to start accutane. I took my first pill in mid May of 40 mg. The course continued for 4 additional months at 60 mg. I dealt with the typical accutane side effects: chapped lips, tiredness, moodiness, etc. It was a long grueling 5 months that finally ended a month ago. I am one month removed from taking my last pill. I'm 99.9% clear with some hyperpigmentation left. I am very happy with the results *knock on wood for continued clearness*

My face looks infinitely better, but I learned a lot about myself through this process. Acne causes just spots. Yes, it does put a damper on one's confidence. But there is a treatment and you can get rid of them. I no longer have acne, but I honestly don't feel too differently. I deal with the same problems that I dealt with acne and I have the same relationships. No one really treats me any differently. My point is, acne is bad but if one is expecting too morph into superman when one's acne is gone you're mistaken. You'll be dealing with the same relationship, school problems or whatever. They are just spots!!! They define you in no way and they shouldn't cause you to be upset especially when its treatable. It's a big hurdle that you just have to go through and it was a huge personal accomplishment when I got rid of it. Do I really feel like my problems are gone for eternity? Yes in the sense that I don't have to spend 1.5 hours or consistently look in the mirror anymore, but other than that I feel the same way. You're environment/exterior shouldn't control your happiness, only you can and that's how I feel with/without acne.

Thanks for reading and good luck to all on their accutane journeys.

I would like to personally thank my mom for her continued support, my girlfriend and friends.