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I'm not really sure where to start with this , the last year has been a living hell for me that's as I'm sure you can understand the only way you can describe the turmoil caused by accutane , for a while I believed it was all the doctors fault but after a certain number of depressive months 2 suicide attempts and a stay in a phychiatric hospital here in Australia I came to realise the majority of the blame could only be placed upon myself , I'd like to say that I commend all of you for coming through this and still been alive and willing to fight the problems you have been faced with , that in itself takes enormous courage when faced with the variety of situations we are , some worse or even slightly better than my own . There are perhaps some clues im struggling to make sense of , and I am hoping you maybe able to shed some light on these for me . So basically whilst on accutane for 5 and a half months I was Also taking lexapro an ssri that some of you may not be familiar with , anyway long story short as I'm sure you can imagine after my experience with accutane and finding the truth behind it ( not just clear skinned people on YouTube ) , I decided enough was enough with medication , I wouldn't pollute my body any longer , ; now during this withdrawal from lexapro which I am currently five months into I have noticed some very interesting things ,
1, my skin is back to been as dry as I was on accutane , (eyes included )
2) the flushing has returned how ever not as bad as when on accutane (yet)
3) muscle pains all over the body
And many other symptoms since coming off lexapro which could both be withdrawal from that drug or accutane catching up with me , I find interesting that lexapro made my skin oily though , surely this may support what some of you have said about are hormones though or testosterone receptors , anyway I'm no scientist , maybe like a lot of you just trying to get out this mess the best we can , I often fantasise that all of us around the world who have been effected could pool our money and resources and build a place full of equipment and finally find the reasons are body's are acting this way and maybe one day find a cure , But apart from that to be surrounded by people who truely , truely understand what you have been through ,, that is my dream most nights apart from dismembering my doctor , good luck to you all and best wishes and if you are reading this and considering takeing accutane do not play Russian roulette with this dastardly substance , to those suffering stay strong , a thank you I believe is in order to Stefan for creating this thread and allowing me to know I'm not going crazy , I'm originally from the uk to It was only after accutane I saw the documentary you were involved in , it's fantastic that you are spreading the message about the destruction this can cause , and also a thank you to all of you that contributed suggestions and your research , each sufferer and victim we get one day closer to getting the answer we need , I hope before I'm dead there will be an explanation , fuck the big pharm
I took Accutane in 2009. If you look through my posting history, I actually kept a log of my course on this site.
My skin cleared up, I got into my dream university, everything seemed wonderful. And then I got really, really depressed. Let me say that there's no history of depression or anxiety on either side of my family. I also haven't had any extremely distressing or negative events happen to me in the last several years, so logically there's no explanation for why I became depressed.
My grades tanked because some days I couldn't even bring myself to get out of bed. My bedroom was a mess because I couldn't ever find the motivation to clean it. I'd stay locked up in my room for days on end, sleeping while the sun was up and laying in bed doing nothing at night. This was a stark contrast from the person I was before I took Accutane - a straight-A student and extrovert. I went to my GP and got a psych referral because she believed I was severely depressed. The psychiatrist agreed with her assessment, and I've been on antidepressants ever since.
6 years after Accutane, if I don't follow a strict high-fiber, low-dairy diet, I get IBS symptoms and anal fissures that don't heal. 6 years after Accutane, I'm taking 300mg of antidepressants each day just to get by. But hey, at least my skin's clear, right?
6684 replies to this thread. this is the biggest thread on this site. calculate that with the total posters on the entire forum. the percentage of people affected by this drug is sufficient. i always estimated about 3-4% of the people who took this drug were affected. But I'm starting to lean towards 10% of 5 - 10 million. That's a lot of people.
AND if there is a connection between Accutane and serotonin (which we feel there is), then surely that would mean the drug affected the brain directly or indirectly, and the company should be culpable for not only the surviving but all the deceased as well.
Roche is hoping we don't start putting 2 and 2 together and taking them to court. Retinoids isn't a viable therapy for the general public. Wonder how much data they hid from regulators. I also don't think Accutane's sole ingredient was just a retinoid, I have a feeling they had more ingredients in theirs.
If any of you have chronically annoying symptoms such as dry skin , flushing , muscle pain , erectile dysfunction , dry eyes , , dry hair , I honestly feel that you should look at look at accutazed post on page on 319 as it correlates with my post earlier today I don't know what the connection is between these ssri's helping accutane side effects , they also cured my raynauds and in most cases help with the flushing mine was under control while I was on it , I also should note though that these medications carry they're own risk as I'm sure you know however if someone is desperate enough I'm sure they might help , after reading through all this im honestly considering going back on my own but at a much lower dose simply to help me comfortabally live my life , I am convinced 250% these will alleviate your e.d as I was prescribed them after a short course of accutane at 16 (1month long before the last one) which left me with that particular side effect :/ there is hope
Out of curiosity, has anyone suffering from ED like me ever triy a penis pump? I tried a couple in the past, but they were cheap ones that you could buy at sex stores. I'm considering buying a quality one.
Do people get real ED from this drug, like being limp all the time? They can't get hard at all, even by their hands?
There is no connection between brain and penis. It is like an attached piece of shit. Then you loose your libido. It changes you and makes you asexual. No porn, no image or no kiss, no touch makes you feel horny and errected. Bad ha?
Out of curiosity, has anyone suffering from ED like me ever triy a penis pump? I tried a couple in the past, but they were cheap ones that you could buy at sex stores. I'm considering buying a quality one.
Do people get real ED from this drug, like being limp all the time? They can't get hard at all, even by their hands?
There is no connection between brain and penis. It is like an attached piece of shit. Then you loose your libido. It changes you and makes you asexual. No porn, no image or no kiss, no touch makes you feel horny and errected. Bad ha?
Yup, it suck really bad. You pretty much described it
Unbroken, you are still young, it sucks i know, but if you wait it out and medicine and science will get better in 5 to 10 years. Also think about all the cinema movies that will be released in the coming years. You have to champion through it, for your family. Write a full report of your symptoms, write to your government and get on medicare, free health care and housing, then all you have to do is focus on getting better full time and take it day by day. That's plan A. Also try to write a letter to Roche asking for help, I'd be curious to see how they respond.
Honestly, the best solution for all of us would be to become more organized on our own website. We could even unite with the finasteride victims as well. If we combine, and assemble, those numbers in one location protesting would turn a lot of heads and make a lot of headlines. Big time headache for the companies. Big attention from Media and government officials. Organization is the first step. Then funding, maybe from one of the accutane victims who won millions off of roche in a lawsuit, if he sees our site and organization, he could help us get everyone in one city, in front of one building, at least for a day or two. It would be epic. And all we would demand is what is the status of progress and research into the drug's mechanisms of action that have afflicted so many? I can imagine the headlines. "Swiss Company laughing all the way to the bank."
I honestly don't think they want to reveal the mechanisms of action because they would be liable in so many ways. I want to do it just to see what their public statement to the world would be. Are they abandoning their failed test subjects? Are they going to do everything in their power to cover medical expenses for the afflicted?
Twenty suicides in Britain over two-year period 'linked to controversial acne drug Roaccutane'
- Drug given to patients whose skin fails to clear up with other treatments
- New figures show 20 people took their own lives while on Roaccutane
- They were among 218 patients in whom side effects were reported
Please leave a comment on the Daily-Mail site.
Honestly, the best solution for all of us would be to become more organized on our own website. We could even unite with the finasteride victims as well. If we combine, and assemble, those numbers in one location protesting would turn a lot of heads and make a lot of headlines. Big time headache for the companies. Big attention from Media and government officials. Organization is the first step. Then funding, maybe from one of the accutane victims who won millions off of roche in a lawsuit, if he sees our site and organization, he could help us get everyone in one city, in front of one building, at least for a day or two. It would be epic. And all we would demand is what is the status of progress and research into the drug's mechanisms of action that have afflicted so many? I can imagine the headlines. "Swiss Company laughing all the way to the bank."
I honestly don't think they want to reveal the mechanisms of action because they would be liable in so many ways. I want to do it just to see what their public statement to the world would be. Are they abandoning their failed test subjects? Are they going to do everything in their power to cover medical expenses for the afflicted?
That would be great and I even suggested something like this a while back, but nothing ever seems to actually be done.
Unbroken94, I felt exactly the same way as you and even thought about doing a very similar thing as you but would never be able to bring myself to do it. If you have an awesome family like you say you do, that should be your soul motivation to not go through with it. I know it's a big reason I would never do it!
So all of you that come on here and suggest the "next big supplement" to help our sides and copy and pasting studies done about receptors and all this stuff, it's mumbo jumbo to people who truly think about suicide.
There are so many different things being suggested and debates that it makes people who feel they are at the end even more deppressed and hopeless.
How about we stick with the website idea suggested by macleod and do something about this.
I suggested a while back like I mentioned earlier, but it just seems to have dissapeared in other discussions and forgotten about.
Wouldn't it make you feel good that something is actually being done about this?!?!?!?!
It would be the happiest day of my life to ruin the company that ruined me!
That would be great and I even suggested something like this a while back, but nothing ever seems to actually be done.
Unbroken94, I felt exactly the same way as you and even thought about doing a very similar thing as you but would never be able to bring myself to do it. If you have an awesome family like you say you do, that should be your soul motivation to not go through with it. I know it's a big reason I would never do it!
So all of you that come on here and suggest the "next big supplement" to help our sides and copy and pasting studies done about receptors and all this stuff, it's mumbo jumbo to people who truly think about suicide.
There are so many different things being suggested and debates that it makes people who feel they are at the end even more deppressed and hopeless.
How about we stick with the website idea suggested by macleod and do something about this.
I suggested a while back like I mentioned earlier, but it just seems to have dissapeared in other discussions and forgotten about.
Wouldn't it make you feel good that something is actually being done about this?!?!?!?!
It would be the happiest day of my life to ruin the company that ruined me!
Agreed. There were a few people working on a full-fledged Accutane forum last year, but it seems to be stuck in development limbo. We have gone too long without a real forum for it to make sense to wait another year. The delay has been harmful enough already.
RAGforum and the ATM forum have basically gone silent.
I'm going to make one more attempt to get the forum currently in development online. If that doesn't go well, I'll do what it takes to have something decent up and running for us by the end of Summer.
If any of you guys have experience in web development or server administration, please PM me. The help would be appreciated.
I'm not really sure where to start with this , the last year has been a living hell for me that's as I'm sure you can understand the only way you can describe the turmoil caused by accutane , for a while I believed it was all the doctors fault but after a certain number of depressive months 2 suicide attempts and a stay in a phychiatric hospital here in Australia I came to realise the majority of the blame could only be placed upon myself , I'd like to say that I commend all of you for coming through this and still been alive and willing to fight the problems you have been faced with , that in itself takes enormous courage when faced with the variety of situations we are , some worse or even slightly better than my own . There are perhaps some clues im struggling to make sense of , and I am hoping you maybe able to shed some light on these for me . So basically whilst on accutane for 5 and a half months I was Also taking lexapro an ssri that some of you may not be familiar with , anyway long story short as I'm sure you can imagine after my experience with accutane and finding the truth behind it ( not just clear skinned people on YouTube ) , I decided enough was enough with medication , I wouldn't pollute my body any longer , ; now during this withdrawal from lexapro which I am currently five months into I have noticed some very interesting things ,
1, my skin is back to been as dry as I was on accutane , (eyes included )
2) the flushing has returned how ever not as bad as when on accutane (yet)
3) muscle pains all over the body
And many other symptoms since coming off lexapro which could both be withdrawal from that drug or accutane catching up with me , I find interesting that lexapro made my skin oily though , surely this may support what some of you have said about are hormones though or testosterone receptors , anyway I'm no scientist , maybe like a lot of you just trying to get out this mess the best we can , I often fantasise that all of us around the world who have been effected could pool our money and resources and build a place full of equipment and finally find the reasons are body's are acting this way and maybe one day find a cure , But apart from that to be surrounded by people who truely , truely understand what you have been through ,, that is my dream most nights apart from dismembering my doctor , good luck to you all and best wishes and if you are reading this and considering takeing accutane do not play Russian roulette with this dastardly substance , to those suffering stay strong , a thank you I believe is in order to Stefan for creating this thread and allowing me to know I'm not going crazy , I'm originally from the uk to It was only after accutane I saw the documentary you were involved in , it's fantastic that you are spreading the message about the destruction this can cause , and also a thank you to all of you that contributed suggestions and your research , each sufferer and victim we get one day closer to getting the answer we need , I hope before I'm dead there will be an explanation , fuck the big pharm
please don't. I went through a phase like this too, you are so young still and can overcome this. life has so much more to offer, and with some lifestyle changes you can feel better than ever.
^.
My skin looks amazing on MDMA
. I believe and think that our sides are fully dependent on our serotonin levels and possibly dopamine production.
Mdma, Weed, Liquor, Mushrooms, NoFap, and **High dose SSRI** are the only things that have drastically lowered symptoms and made me feel normal and beautiful.
**I started on a low dose (5mg) SSRI Cipralex and worked my way up to 20mg. @ 20mg almost all symptoms were completely gone however i just felt way too speedy in my mind to continue on it. I stopped the SSRI's and went with NoFap which is a longer and harder approach but gets me close to the same results.
I am going to discuss with my doctor about trying other SSRI's that don't make me feel so speedy ><.
Koi go to a doctor and talk about getting prescription SSRI meds. They will make your skin beautiful like it is on MDMA.
howdy,
Glad to hear that you are getting results from those alternative means of healing. However they probably in the long run wont be as effective and obviously detrimental to your mental health and physical health. Alcohol is only going to impair your liver more and if you end up going down the path of flushing and whatever detox's you think may work, a crippled liver wont make this easy.
I'm pretty much done with trying meds. I reckon the only way to get myself out of this mess is just sticking to something and put 100% in for as long as it takes.
So anyway I got my 5-HTP, didnt cure my eye floaters sadly but it has brought my mood up to the point where I can feel like I have a personality again. Im taking 200mg most mornings combined with zinc which I thought might reduce copper.
So while the 5HTP might be doing something Im pretty sure the zinc is just aggravating shit.
Dr. L. Wilson talks about having copper and no copper at all when you are copper toxic, that is to say that its stored up in your soft tissue fucking shit up but at the same time your body isnt using it properly which leads to you having none that is 'available' so to speak.
I actually ate heaps of chocolate the other night and then yesterday morning I just felt super good, real loud and no anxiety at all while at work. Today I feeling pretty rubbish. I think thats because the copper from the chocolate has aggrevated the copper stored in my soft tissue and now is creating a ruckus.
Argh there is so many factors in this stupid ailment it really fucking annoys me.
For all the people who think 'ending it' is the only way out, you really should understand that your emotions are being massively affected by whatever is still poisoning you after accutane. The only thing you can do is just start making some solid progress on healing.
My little plan is this.
Hair mineral analysis
supplements
Exercise (weights)
Having more fun
I reckon thats a pretty solid plan of recovery.
To each their own though.
I've been laying out and tanning lately. I don't really feel the pleasure of the suns rays like I used to, but i do feel them, they are powerful. I don't quite feel much during, but after a good one hour session and back in the normal shade, i do feel some added energy. It's also not that far fetched to think that the rays penetrate through the skin and to the organs. it's kind of like a sun massage. but never forget to lotion because our skin has thinned so much now and is more susceptible, as you all know.
The area where I tan actually has a lot of vultures that fly overhead often, and I thought it seemed fitting. I laughed and thought to myself "exactly...but not quite yet fuckers"
So all of you that come on here and suggest the "next big supplement" to help our sides and copy and pasting studies done about receptors and all this stuff, it's mumbo jumbo to people who truly think about suicide.
i am posting about studies and agree that people who are suicidal should skip those posts cause it might make them more depressed.
but i just have to kepp searching, i can't just leave it alone. i am doing my best with my not english speaking native origin and non scientific backround to look for actual science studies and try to make progress, even if it is all wrong, i cant just do nothimg and waith for a miracle.
contacting the scientist who made the studies like the big one on foxo, and ask for help can also be a good idea, maybe they have a clue on how to reverse the dammage(altered mechanism), these can be faster than waiting for the accutane company to do so (not saying that there shouldn't be such a demand from them to reveal what they know).
I understand where you are coming from. When I said that I was caught in the moment and apologize if I offended anyone. Continue doing what yall do, nothing against ya'll and I do understand that maybe ya'll will discover something faster than action could be done. This forum topic is technically "Repairing the long-term damage from Accutane"
Hopefully Dubya, with any help he could get, could get a forum or website going about taking action and openening eyes to the public about what this drug is doing to people.
Hey guys. I've been lurking on the forum for quite a while, read almost all pages of the thread and many, many others from around the web. I've been prescribed the generic version of Accutane, which is here in Poland called "Izotek".
For many years I was unaware of the damage this drug left me with. I just recently began connecting the dots. So I was a normal kid, happy and energetic, one of the best students in class. I didn't have to study to get the best results, I didn't suffer from depression, anxiety', any kind of mental ilness, disorder. My problems with acne started when I was about 13, the next year it got worse and worse. Some people say that they took Accutane because of the few pimples, for me it was the last thing to try (thats what I thought then), tried many creams, antibiotics etc. So my derm prescribed isotretinoin. Read the BOOK with side effects and started the theraphy. 80mg/day a day for 8 months...
That was begining of the end of my life. Yes it cured the acne. And I didn't get any breakouts since. But... From the bright and energetic kid I changed into sluggish and slow shadow of myself. I started being anxious around people. Sweating like a pig, turning bright red, joint pains, muscle pains. I used to train running. Wanted to be a proffesional athlete. That was all gone. I couldn't run as fast as I used to. I began to get tired easily. I became very anxious, depressed and tired. I lost interests in all my hobbies. I used to love photography, music, sports. Nothing bothered me anymore. Girls? Im loosing my mind here, who cares about girls... I was a young boy who didn't know that he was mutilated for life. Of course isotretinoin ruined my sex life. Premature ejaculation, loss of erection, sensitivity. I lost ability to concentrate, to study, to think analyticaly. I used to be good at maths. After tane I barely graduated. The I went to highschool.
These supposed to be the best years in my life. They weren't. I was always scared, I couldn't study, I couldn't meet with friends, I became a wierdo. From the top student I became one of the worst. Barely slipped from one year to another. My life lost its meaning. I didn't have a goal, I didn't want to live. I knew that something was seriously wrong. But I didn't know what. What was going on with my body. I started having fights with my parents because I was afraid of going to school and I couldn't study properly. They couldn't understand what happened to their son. I used to be a really smart kid, no kidding. I tried psychologists, theraphy, nothing worked. When I was 18 I first went to psychiatrist. He prescribed fluoxetine (Prozac). It helped with anxiety, but added some extra side effects, before I was feeling detached from reality, but after starting this SSRI i became really derealized. I just couldn't care less. I went to university. I was thinking about being a journalist, but its hard to pursue your goal when you don't feel anything, you cannot connect to the reality and other people, you don't have a drive to live. That was the first time in my life I became suicidal. I was 19. I wanted to jump from the builidings, tried to posion myself. I dropped out of uni after first year. Thats was 4 years ago.
Today Im 23 years of age. Its been 8 years since my chemoteraphy with Accutane. Shortly after leaving university I ended up in the psychiatric ward. The didn't know how to help me. Over the years I tried many meds: fluoxetine, duloxetine, sertraline, citalopram, trazodon, quetiapine, depakine. None of them helped. If you think psychiatric meds are the answer to your problems, THE ARE NOT. I beg you, stay away from them. Just as Accutane damage your body, so do these meds. The post Accutane and post SSRI dysfunction symptom are very similar. You will just make things worse. And withrawal from them is hell. My life is aliving hell. I barely sleep. I was hospitalized for the second time two weeks ago. I tried to hang myself. Im living with a total sexual dysfunction, my penis is close to atrophy and I suffer from Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder after taking sertraline. Over the years I developed gynecomastia. It didn't matter how many hours I spent in the gym, how many miles I run, how healthy I was eating, how many supplements I took (glucosamine, L - arginine, zinc, ginko biloba, flaxseed, magnesium, fish oil etc), my body was slowly giving up. Last year Im thinking about suicde every day, every hour, every minute. I go to sleep wising I wont wake up and waking up regreting that Im still alive. I used to pray a lot. I don't do this anymore. To tell you the truth I don't know why Im still alive. When I look in the mirror I don't know who is that wreck that Im looking at. Im unemployed, not able to work, in constant joint and muscle pain, lost all my friends, live with my parents that are slowly loosing whats left of their patience for me and without any hope left. I don't believe in the miraculous cures either. It certainly wont happen during our lifetimes. Or probably never. Because why should it. We are vitims of a buisness that brings enourmous amount of money to the people that don't care about our health. Just like psychiatric meds. Im not a big fan of concpiracy theories, Big Pharma and all that stuff, but one thing will never change. People will always try to take advantage of those who are weak and in need. Im sorry for all the bitterness, its my first post here but believe me I had a lot of time to think about all of this. Seems like a life time. I wish you all strengh. For me tomorrow might as well not come. Take care people
^Sucks to here that...a lot of those side effects are similar to mine. All we can do is keep trying till we find some combo of herbs/vitamins/drug or other treatment, that works.
Personally I don't have much faith in vitamins for us.
That said, DO take a basic multi (without vitamin A) , zinc and vitamin D in the morning as well as a liver supplement (which Accutane affects).
I found if I take anything with vitamin A, it causes me problems. Note also full fat dairy and egg yolks contain a lot, so I've had to cut that out as well.
Cover the basics with vitamin and no more. If they don't work , at least you are benefiting general health wise by taking recommended amounts.
Next, do blood work. Find an open minded GP. Get the basic hormone panel and bloods done. Make sure to get cortisol tested as well (saliva preferred on that one) to rule out Adrenal fatigue.
Hormone problems alone could explain all your symptoms. Accutane has recently been shown within the last couple of years in studies to lower certain hormones.
If your hormones all check out normal for someone YOUR age (this is important as many doctors compare you to people 95 years old) , there are medications that can increase libido. I have taken some of these and noted a marked improvement in mood and libido , however I am very sensitive to insomnia, so had to stop some.
Selegiline low dose (1.25 - 5 mg per day) - an indicated antidepressant in itself also with libido enhancement.
L Dopa - No need to use the doses near what Parkinson's use. I found appetite increase, libido increase etc.
Luvox - SSRI - It is the only one in this class noted not to cause sexual side effects and can actually enhance libido.
If you have headaches as well, Topamax is noted to enhance libido and help headaches, but can cause severe appetite loss in some people.
Trazodone helps sleep and depression, and doesnt usually come with the sexual side effects (not available here in Aus though).
Im very sorry to hear your story dortheatos it strikes a nerve with me especially the part where you speak of inability to convey your struggle to others in a way they will actually believe it , I think part of the problem is many people go on the drug and are fine so when some fall victim no one believes us , but trust me brother I feel your pain ,, I also have been on ssri's at the same time as accutane and am currently post 7 weeks withdrawal from all medication. I feel like my mind is no longer my own and I can attest to the struggle you are facing, couple this with the failure of vital bodily functions and one begins to sink further into depression , as for cures I agree with you I feel there will never be one in our life time, i feel the only way we will survive is to adapt . It is extremely difficult and I can only imagine the hell you are going through even though I am going through my own , I managed to make my parents see the light and realise how critically it really had effected my Heath and I'm currently trying to find methods of dealing with this , I don't know your home situation but you mentioned your parents believe it's al in your head , maybe you could start by showing them some documentaries or evidence to support your claims , if you ever want to talk then inbox me man we are all in this together , in the real world we spend each day we feeling outsiders, we feel strange and weak , polluted , degraded I agree totally with what you are saying , but on here we can form connections and a sort of family , not one by blod but one that has been forged by situation and struggle . Hang on a couple more years I'm gunna win the lottery and buy an island where we can all migrate and heal , eat round bonfires every night and smoke tropical plants , wouldn't that be a dream come true , but it will get better , I realise that now , at least that is what I have to believe
Dortheatos,
I'm very new here, but I can totally relate to everything you have said and are feeling, and to be completely honest, have been struggling with a lot of the same things again recently myself. It has been almost 19 years for me. I have found some things that have helped, but no one is exactly the same. I literally had a conversation about this tonight with my father, who has never believed something like this was due to accutane, but after looking around and talking to some people he knows this last week, I think he is starting to open up to the possibility (Hey 19 years later is better than never right! ). To be totally honest, I have felt and thought exactly the same way at times. I have managed to survive by accepting suicidal ideation as a depression symptom and not a true, clear desire. If I start thinking about suicide, I have to catch myself and say, "That's not me, that's my depression". I have found things that helped me function and lead a mostly normal life at times, and to be honest, I started taking the 5-HTP supplement I learned about on this board two days ago, and have noticed some hopeful positive results already (My poop is starting to resemble what poop should look like!!!!). It really is the little things. : ) I guess what I am trying to say is that, I know you have no hope right now, but your depression is lying to you. There is always hope. Even when we can't see it, or even imagine it. It is still there. This world and life itself are full of almost infinite possibilities, inlcuding the possibility of surviving this and getting better. I am not a religious person, but I do hope that if any benevolent force higher than ourselves exists, that it may find you, and soothe you. Brother, know that you are not truly alone, and while I can sadly relate and understand to what you are feeling and thinking now, I still believe you can make it through this if you choose. It will not be easy, but I think it will be a lot better than if you give up now.
I wish you love and peace brother,
Chad
P.S. I also bought a lottery ticket tonight, so maybe someday unbroken's island paradise may actually exist. : )
Hey Chad, thank you for your support, it really means a lot to me. Did you ever meet in person with someone who has similar problems to us post tane? I cannot imagine living the next year, bot speaking about next 11. I really admire you man and your strong will. I thought I was strong, but these 8 years been too much. The worst thing is looking at your friends who are healthy and happy and don't even realize how low you can fall. Yes, I envy them. Do you have emotional blunting, derealization, depresonalization, sexual problems, social phobia since starting Accutane? Our story is very similar to Stefan who created this thread, he's 25 now and started tane when he was 15, just like us. He's also struggling. One thing I can say and I will probably get boring with that but, stay away from pychiatric meds, they ruined me even further. I wish we could have our island where we could heal, but Im too much of a realist to believe that. I used to be a dreamer, had billions of ideas, now I just don't want to get through every day again and again, don't want to wake up. Sometimes I regret I don't have a gun. My parents used to work for PHARMA, they were selling all kind of pcyh meds. Maybe its better that they don't do it anymore. But they don't seem to understand or think something like our case is possible, they don't even knowabout withdrawal from psych meds. If you didn't read it already I strongly recomend you all to look at these links:
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David Healy is one of the few doctors from around the globe who knows the real risk of prescription medications and is trying to solve the problem
Hello!
Im new to this forum but not new to the drug. I was on roacuttane for 6 months when i was 17. Before that i tried creams and tetracyclin but finally i was put on accutane. My acne was a lot but not cystic. But i was image concious and wanted a quick solution to the problem as every 17 year old..
Starting to take the drug i was a bit worried. I had my first panic attack taking this drug but most of the months i just felt exhausted and not very interested about anything. The first five years after was a mess. I am a relative sensitive person but my thoughts about life have just never been the same before or since. During these years i tried different jobs and educations but i was really afraid to do anything new and had severe fatigue. I went to different doctors but all they saw was a young guy with facial hair. Can't be any problems with his health? His heart sounds fine.
After 5 years "something" happened. Over a second i got new energy and could not even understand why i had been so sad. I still feel sad a lot but moore like i did pre accutane. I know these developing years is a tough time for a lot of guys and i dont blame my problems on accutane yet. But my feeling is that accutane changed something in me. Perhaps my hormone-status.
I guess my biggest problem right now is what should i think of these years? It feels awful that noone helped me and everyone just moved on with their lives. I am so glad for my parents. I cant for the life of me understand why they havent even googled "roacuttan" during these years. But they have been there for me and called to check on me.
My other issue is i have a slight tinnitus that changes when i move my mouth. My guess is that my jaw havent developed as it should but hopefully i can recover from that.
I have tryed to read to the thread but its very long and havent got through it yet. Is there a sticky somewhere with what actually have worked?
I have saved money to be able to live free this summer so my plan is to excerice moore and harder. I read that someone had been much better after that. And trye some different diets and perhaps some supplements.
My thought goes to everyone hurt by this drug in any way. With you with my problems or other side effects my biggest advice is. Dont be afraid to seek help! I didnt dare to do this for so many years because i was afraid to show my weak side and afraid it would hurt my carrer/life. But if you feel sick you must get stronger before you can help others. Dont be afraid to seek help from whatever institutions available in your country. You are not lazy or just depressed you have been hurt by a drug the same way as people treated for cancer. You wouldnt expect a cancer patient that lived trough it just go back to work would you? If you see a light. Playing the guitar or watching a movie. Do that and dont be ashamed.
Sorry for the long starter post. My next one will be shorter. /jake
I'm very worried about how I'm losing my ability to fully follow a thought more and more everyday. I used to be known as a great writer, now I can barely form sentences, let alone paragraphs. I'm hopeful that I will be so motivated to survive that the thoughts I do slowly form will improve my health very slowly, even perhaps miraculously. I don't want to die but everything feels impossibly difficult and I'm too unsupported. Not meaning to be negative, just need to vent. On the bright side, I haven't lost hope thanks to this thread and all you strong people still trying in the face of disaster.