Yesterday I finally texted my friend and told her why I was so quite and what was going on in my life. It's weird for me to pour out my feelings to a female friend but it was SO worth it. She totally heard my issue and helped me out. One part of me feels embarrassed but another part of my feels so glad and happy.
I'm so happy to hear that you did this and and the girl was supportive of you, I'm sure it was a huge relief and a weight off your shoulders. I've wanted SO badly to tell girls that are interested in me how I feel about my skin just so that I can get it out of the way and not have it be this huge secret that eats at me, but everyone is always saying "girls like confident guys" so I've always been afraid if I admit I have insecurity about my skin it would drive the girl away and be a huge turn off to her. This always happens where I'll be talking to a girl and she's seeming really into me and then I'll have a breakout and I WANT to explain to her why I'm acting so standoffish all of a sudden instead of my usual joking/fun personality...but I hold back from admitting the reason is I'm feeling low about my skin. It's just been so ingrained into my head by the media and dating advice you hear on shows and in magazines that a man needs to be confident around a woman and not admit to his to his own insecurities, etc etc...and that's so depressing because how am I supposed to have a healthy relationship with a woman if I have to keep how my acne makes me feel a secret all the time? Relationships are supposed to be built on trust...
But anyways, this post is really inspiring because it tells me some girls will be understanding about something like this.
Woohoo! Bulk of my uni assessment is out of the way - which means I can relax and de-stress a little before final exams - which I really need to do because I've been incredibly stressed lately and it definitely showed on my skin. I had a horrible cyst on my chin but it seems to be going away and I'm seeing some improvement in the rest of my skin too so I'm feeling a little better about my skin today. I'm also trying to be gentler with my skin and not pick at it or anything like that. It will be easier now that assignments are finished because I find it's a habit that gets worse when I'm stressed...
Not good. Started using a 2% BHA, thought it was working amazingly without the affects BP caused, but today is a different story. My skin is slightly flaky, tight and it has brought up a huge whitehead near my nose - so painful (had to pop!)
Every time something doesn't work for me I tend to just stop it immediately. I don't know whether I should continue or stop using it. It's not that it's not working...I just want something without all the crazy initial breakouts and dryness.
*Edit: After washing my face and applying some more BHA, things don't look as bad. I need to learn to stick to things, even if they don't work at first.
Not good. Started using a 2% BHA, thought it was working amazingly without the affects BP caused, but today is a different story. My skin is slightly flaky, tight and it has brought up a huge whitehead near my nose - so painful (had to pop!)
Every time something doesn't work for me I tend to just stop it immediately. I don't know whether I should continue or stop using it. It's not that it's not working...I just want something without all the crazy initial breakouts and dryness.
Lewis, I broke out initially with BHA! I forgot to mention that... in fact, why don't you check out my log of using PC products and how they worked for me? I stopped using them because of price...but it was quite a success. My log is linked in my signature.
Feel like a complete emotional mess, and extremely angry at myself. I sat down with my husband last night with the intention of telling him my acne story, but no words would come out. We sat for literally HOURS and I started to cry and lash out at him in frustration of not being able to articulate, he then retaliated and said I have been deceitful about whatever this problem is. Just all so draining, and feel that I avoided telling him everything last night because I wasn't getting a good vibe from him, when I tell him I need sympathy plus understanding - I feel that maybe he will tell me it's nothing
Not good. Started using a 2% BHA, thought it was working amazingly without the affects BP caused, but today is a different story. My skin is slightly flaky, tight and it has brought up a huge whitehead near my nose - so painful (had to pop!)
Every time something doesn't work for me I tend to just stop it immediately. I don't know whether I should continue or stop using it. It's not that it's not working...I just want something without all the crazy initial breakouts and dryness.
Lewis, I broke out initially with BHA! I forgot to mention that... in fact, why don't you check out my log of using PC products and how they worked for me? I stopped using them because of price...but it was quite a success. My log is linked in my signature.
Yeah, your log is what pretty much inspired my decision to try PC products.
I agree, the price is definitely off-putting. I'm using a ton of samples (that's all I could afford) to try it out first, but in order to see real results I'm going to have to get the full-sized amounts. Did the BHA gel make you quite shiny once it had dried? I had a couple of samples of the mattifying moisturiser which helped, but my usual moisturiser isn't doing anything for that.
Feel like a complete emotional mess, and extremely angry at myself. I sat down with my husband last night with the intention of telling him my acne story, but no words would come out. We sat for literally HOURS and I started to cry and lash out at him in frustration of not being able to articulate, he then retaliated and said I have been deceitful about whatever this problem is. Just all so draining, and feel that I avoided telling him everything last night because I wasn't getting a good vibe from him, when I tell him I need sympathy plus understanding - I feel that maybe he will tell me it's nothing
Eek... I'm sorry. I definitely think you should just talk to him. Like, right now. Go get off the computer and talk to him. Because at this point you're building it up to be this big thing and it's probably freaking him out and making him think something way worse is wrong. Just talk...you don't have to sit down at a special time to do it, you know? Just be like, I'm sorry I'm being weird, here's why...
Feel like a complete emotional mess, and extremely angry at myself. I sat down with my husband last night with the intention of telling him my acne story, but no words would come out. We sat for literally HOURS and I started to cry and lash out at him in frustration of not being able to articulate, he then retaliated and said I have been deceitful about whatever this problem is. Just all so draining, and feel that I avoided telling him everything last night because I wasn't getting a good vibe from him, when I tell him I need sympathy plus understanding - I feel that maybe he will tell me it's nothing
Eek... I'm sorry.
I definitely think you should just talk to him. Like, right now. Go get off the computer and talk to him. Because at this point you're building it up to be this big thing and it's probably freaking him out and making him think something way worse is wrong. Just talk...you don't have to sit down at a special time to do it, you know? Just be like, I'm sorry I'm being weird, here's why...
>
Feel like a complete emotional mess, and extremely angry at myself. I sat down with my husband last night with the intention of telling him my acne story, but no words would come out. We sat for literally HOURS and I started to cry and lash out at him in frustration of not being able to articulate, he then retaliated and said I have been deceitful about whatever this problem is. Just all so draining, and feel that I avoided telling him everything last night because I wasn't getting a good vibe from him, when I tell him I need sympathy plus understanding - I feel that maybe he will tell me it's nothing
Eek... I'm sorry.
I definitely think you should just talk to him. Like, right now. Go get off the computer and talk to him. Because at this point you're building it up to be this big thing and it's probably freaking him out and making him think something way worse is wrong. Just talk...you don't have to sit down at a special time to do it, you know? Just be like, I'm sorry I'm being weird, here's why...
I have a feeling he knows what it is...feel so humiliated and full of shame. Can't talk for at least another 6 hours as he's at work. Plus I want to make sure it's dark when we have the conversation so he can't scrutinise my skin. This is sooooo uncomfortable for me, wish I could run away somewhere. After sitting in silence last night for ages whilst I tried to tell him, I got really nasty due to my frustration and upset, he retaliated by saying I have been deceitful for hiding this problem from him. Urgh, I do my best to hide it (by avoiding talking/covering it with make up) because I am so ashamed.
Feel like a complete emotional mess, and extremely angry at myself. I sat down with my husband last night with the intention of telling him my acne story, but no words would come out. We sat for literally HOURS and I started to cry and lash out at him in frustration of not being able to articulate, he then retaliated and said I have been deceitful about whatever this problem is. Just all so draining, and feel that I avoided telling him everything last night because I wasn't getting a good vibe from him, when I tell him I need sympathy plus understanding - I feel that maybe he will tell me it's nothing
Eek... I'm sorry.
I definitely think you should just talk to him. Like, right now. Go get off the computer and talk to him. Because at this point you're building it up to be this big thing and it's probably freaking him out and making him think something way worse is wrong. Just talk...you don't have to sit down at a special time to do it, you know? Just be like, I'm sorry I'm being weird, here's why...
I have a feeling he knows what it is...feel so humiliated and full of shame. Can't talk for at least another 6 hours as he's at work. Plus I want to make sure it's dark when we have the conversation so he can't scrutinise my skin. This is sooooo uncomfortable for me, wish I could run away somewhere. After sitting in silence last night for ages whilst I tried to tell him, I got really nasty due to my frustration and upset, he retaliated by saying I have been deceitful for hiding this problem from him. Urgh, I do my best to hide it (by avoiding talking/covering it with make up) because I am so ashamed.
My cheekbone is an infamous part of my face for me.It always gets hideous acne.Somehow sweat trickles there while i'm in the gym and inevitably i scratch there and eureka! There's a big inflamed monster born there.Why can't it be like people who do a thousand and one disgusting things with their faces and never get a single pimple?Why is my skin so gullible...
I'm doing good! I've been working on increasing my BP on the regimen as it seems part of my face built a slight tolerance to the amount I was using. I went too far and got dried out so I had to go back to what I was using. After a few days I finally got rid of the extreme amount of flaking. Now that I'm increasing again my face is rapidly clearing.
I even started exercising again a few days ago!
I had what I call a *fuck-it" day today. Normally I`m ultra strict with my diet but I`m just so fed-up with everything right now that I had two cappuccinos, a biscuit and raisin yorkie chocolate bar and large cod and chips for tea. For nomal people it wouldn`t be a problem to have this but for someone with a fucked up immune system like mine, I will no doubt break out and look like hideous shit over the next few days.
Right now my neck and chest are a mess. No idea if it is hormonal, genetic, an allergy, folliculitis or acne - I`ve dealt with this crap mainly on and very occasionally off for the best part of three decades now and I`m sick and tired of it.
I`m currently doing CBT - had three sessions so far but if I`m honest up to now it is doing sod all to help. I find it absolutely impossible to be positive when I look like this. I`m fed-up with people (usually clear skinned people who are perfect) telling me that it does not matter coz it does. Like it or not acne makes you feel inferior and an outcast.
Sorry for the rant - as you can tell I`m having a very bad day.
Feeling tired! These last few weeks of school are going to drag and i am also preparing to move to a new appartment. Add to that i am breaking out in clusters on the lower half of my face and well, i feel like shit! Could be worse but i was wish it was better. 5 weeks into my regimen so far. Hoping that by month 2, things will be consistently better.
I love the TOP half of my face (cheeks, nose and forehead), but my chin just always has healing whiteheads and new ones forming. Grr!
Today I did and egg white mask and then moisturised with the yolk (and then washed it off). Seriously, since using egg white masks in conjunction with Paula's Choice BHA, my red marks have diminished. You'd never thought I had acne if I showed you half of my face. Shame the other half isn't as pleasant.
I don't understand why I started scarring so badly this half-year... I moisturise enough and use the same spot treatment like I did always, but recently some unstoppable process started in my skin. I could say that it got significantly worse after 4 red pulsating laser treatments I had and/or the high dose A and D supplements. Whatever it is, it continues making my scars worse. I use MSM cream right now, but will try to get a retinoid cream again cause it doesn't seem to help much. The worst is that I still break out in the damaged areas and it deepens the scarring.
Yesterday I went out to a club, wore some makeup and realised so clearly, that my scarring got deeper, more visible, spread wider. One of my friends with whom I went out, also has hormonal acne, it was more severe at some points than mine, but now she cleared up from her bcp, and it didn't leave her with any scarring, just minor. She will be able to recover from acne without too much trace, but mine just got terribly wrong. I regret experimenting with supplements and other shit, as I suspect it did me such injustice.
If anyone can give me any information on scarring and supplements (and how to stop this process), it would be greatly appreciated (I'm on Diane-35 and Androcur + MSM cream and multivitamin supplements).
I don't know about supplements, but I have been pretty blessed when it comes from healing quickly from scars and I think my diet is a huge part of it. I used to get scars when I was younger from scrapes and stuff and I noticed that since I got all into healthy food they all went away (even ones I've had for years). The ones from the really bad acne I had a few months back are all fading fast. I don't know what exactly does the trick but I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables, especially greens.
A huge stress has been lifted yesterday when I passed my oral exams for my doctorate. Almost done now, but I don't feel as accomplished as I want to because a) I don't have a good job lined up yet b) the stress of this degree has had a huge toll on my health and social life. Next week, I will start attending biofeedback management sessions, as suggested by a doctor I saw for my allergies, and I hope this will teach me how to manage my stress and hormones better in a natural way. My visit to the allergist was far more useful than I expected because, unlike most doctors, she didn't try to load me up with medication but instead tried to help me figure out how stress, depression, and anxiety are related to acne. She also told me something that really resonated with me, and I wanted to share it with all of you. She said: "Talk to yourself like you would talk to your best friend. You would never tell your best friend they are ugly and useless, so why tell it to yourself?"It sounds simple and obvious, but I hadn't realized how much I talk down to myself every day until I heard that. Self-acceptance is a very important part of emotionally healing the mental scars left from acne.
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
Woohooo!!
So happy for you - great to hear you were able to talk to him about it and to hear how understanding he was. I bet it is a great relief for you and weight off your shoulders!
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
Woohooo!!
So happy for you - great to hear you were able to talk to him about it and to hear how understanding he was. I bet it is a great relief for you and weight off your shoulders!
Yes it was emotional, and such a relief! Has also deepened our relationship
Oh and he made me feel even better by telling me it is not diet related - he knows that it is a genetic/hormonal thing and knows I can't help it. One of the things I always get paranoid about is the fact that others may be looking at my skin assuming that I'm eating crap (when nothing could be further from the truth) due to being so badly bullied about this in the past by people in my circle, he was shocked as he assumed anyone over the age of about 10 knows the cause of acne is not poor diet! Well he told me not to worry as most people he hangs out with are smart enough to realise this and won't pick on me. I'm not totally convinced of this as in my experience (and people's stories on here) it seems that the general public still seem to believe the myths about acne and make us feel ashamed for having it.
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
So happy for you Ibiza! Like I said, it's so nice to have someone around you that knows your insecurities so that they can help you move through them. What a wonderful husband you have! Congratulations on overcoming the fear of talking to him-- I've been there and I know how hard it is. He seems like such a loving and understanding person!
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
So happy for you Ibiza! Like I said, it's so nice to have someone around you that knows your insecurities so that they can help you move through them. What a wonderful husband you have! Congratulations on overcoming the fear of talking to him-- I've been there and I know how hard it is.
He seems like such a loving and understanding person!
Yes my hubby is lovely and I feel blessed to have him in my life
Your man sounds wonderful too, and very supportive.
It must be hard for them to understand the condition though if they've never had it, although my husband said he suffered pretty bad back and shoulder acne when he was younger but it was for a fairly brief period.
How have you been? How is your skin recently?
Feeling much happier - I TOLD MY HUSBAND ABOUT MY ACNE ON FRIDAY!!!
For those of you who don't know, I had hidden my acne condition from him since we met as I was so ashamed, but couldn't hide it much longer and so glad we had the talk. It was difficult for me to open up to him, but his reaction was the best I could have ever hoped for!
He said that having acne is perfectly normal and natural, also very common. He said it does not reduce my attractiveness level neither is it a turn off for him! He doesn't think it's a big deal and doesn't bother him at all, he doesn't think I need skin resurfacing but will support me if I choose to go down that road (which I still want to).
What a relief though! Now when I'm in a bad mood due to my skin, or feel uncomfortable in social situations I can tell him exactly what's on my mind
Yay! I was hoping that you just did it. You're lucky to have a good guy like that. My man is also great like that but then he is mean to me in other ways, so yeah... blah. lol
Me: I'm doing okay. Still totally clear. What changed? lol The only thing I can think is that it's been months now with no caffeine and quite a while without any probiotics. I know those are two major things that break me out. The only other time I broke out was when I ate that corn.
It's crazy. I never imagined I'd have a time where I couldn't even remember the last time I had a breakout! Woo hoo! I guess I have to credit the regimen, but I think it's also just that I'm finally figuring out what exactly my triggers are.
Personal life: still sucks. We're stuck in between breaking up and being together and it's killing me.