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well for once i actually had a good day, i went out with my family to the golden coral had a great time. i won a stuffed doll from the coin machine =) i'v always been good at those! it was a lady bug, i gave it to my lil sister. after that i went to a Walmart it had been months sense i'v been in one and tbh i was beginning to miss it lol it felt good being in there. overall the day was good i enjoyed myself. so many girl check me out man lol, but im always so serious obviously because of my past experiences and i want to mention that i did wear my hat all day and yes it is because it helps me when im in public mentally i fell can hid behind the shadow that my hat makes lol. i need to work my way up to not needing it and and that would require showing my bare face =/. im not quite ready yet for that yet..
Ugh I feel so terrible. Had a bad day. I kept trying to hide my face because of the hideous acne and it made me look stupid. (the way I was acting, and the acne itself)
Sigh. I really wish I could skip school for a couple months.
I nearly cried today. Right in front of my teacher. Bad day. Bad day. Ugh. I really want this acne gone.
I always have this fear of breaking out , but it's been month of having clear skin with occasional zits. My skin has been very smooth for months! Thus, I am going to stop being afraid of breaking out. I am not going to worry about my skin anymore. I will not search for zits in the mirror, I will not touch my face to spot an active one, etc.
I always have this fear of breaking out , but it's been month of having clear skin with occasional zits. My skin has been very smooth for months! Thus, I am going to stop being afraid of breaking out. I am not going to worry about my skin anymore. I will not search for zits in the mirror, I will not touch my face to spot an active one, etc.
Same! Despite my clear skin (but, with the occasional zit), I still search for them! It's ridiculous! The other day, I got out of the shower looking fresh-faced, and for some reason decided to sit there in front of the mirror and pick at literally nothing. It made my face less than fresh. Boo. I'm with you, though! No more worrying about it so much! My face is back to fresh-mode, and I'm content with it-- No more zooming in on my pores. 
I think I'm getting the flu
Really not a good time (it never is though) - I have an exam this week and multiple other assessments. It's just a busy time and being sick won't help so I hope I'm just having a bad morning and I'm not actually getting sick!
My skin had been looking a little better but then I went and used a clay mask, which felt amazing but I think it has a 'drawing' effect - that or my skin doesn't like it... either way I've broken out a little and I'm guessing it's from that. Thankfully they're small and a lot of the big stuff I had are shrinking. The thing that's getting to me the most are all the red marks I have. They're fairly dark, show up very easily and are obvious as my skin is so pale. It's hard for me to hide them even with makeup but I guess that also has to do with what the lighting is like wherever I am. I don't really know how to fade them or If I should try to fade them while I still have acne... I remember years ago I tried a neutrogena product that was meant to help with fading - I think it was glycolic and salicylic acid - but I don't remember what I thought of it. I might try it again and see.
Hope you feel better ! <3. I got the flu and it sucks. I gotta work because they always need me. I'm just a nice person who rarely miss a day at work. I work hard because I want to make my boss' job easier.
Well well, all that stress seems to have affected my acne greater than I ever thought it would. On one hand I'm in agony, on the other - couldn't care less...Right now I can feel small bumps under my skin all over the face, those are the upcoming breakouts which will definitely destroy my face and I feel like I want to laugh hysterically. Laugh at this ridiculous body which will anyway die and rott like all the others,
Feel like i am on a never ending roller coaster. Feeling as if clear skin for ME is a pipe dream. One day at a time i suppose
I think I'm getting the flu
My skin had been looking a little better but then I went and used a clay mask, which felt amazing but I think it has a 'drawing' effect - that or my skin doesn't like it... either way I've broken out a little and I'm guessing it's from that. Thankfully they're small and a lot of the big stuff I had are shrinking. The thing that's getting to me the most are all the red marks I have. They're fairly dark, show up very easily and are obvious as my skin is so pale. It's hard for me to hide them even with makeup but I guess that also has to do with what the lighting is like wherever I am. I don't really know how to fade them or If I should try to fade them while I still have acne... I remember years ago I tried a neutrogena product that was meant to help with fading - I think it was glycolic and salicylic acid - but I don't remember what I thought of it. I might try it again and see.
Hope you feel better ! <3. I got the flu and it sucks. I gotta work because they always need me. I'm just a nice person who rarely miss a day at work. I work hard because I want to make my boss' job easier.
Thank you
I think yesterday I was just feeling off for some reason - I feel fine today so I don't think I'm getting sick, thankfully!
I hate it when I get good news, then realize it's not that great in the first place. But I am happy that this news has significantly lowered my stress levels. My face is still a mess, not just acne-wise, but also in terms of texture and pore size. But I try not to let it bother me and I just go about my day without paying attention to my acne. There is a bit of an improvement and reduced inflammation, so hopefully I'm on the right track with my treatment.
I always have this fear of breaking out , but it's been month of having clear skin with occasional zits. My skin has been very smooth for months! Thus, I am going to stop being afraid of breaking out. I am not going to worry about my skin anymore. I will not search for zits in the mirror, I will not touch my face to spot an active one, etc.
Same! Despite my clear skin (but, with the occasional zit), I still search for them! It's ridiculous! The other day, I got out of the shower looking fresh-faced, and for some reason decided to sit there in front of the mirror and pick at literally nothing. It made my face less than fresh. Boo. I'm with you, though! No more worrying about it so much! My face is back to fresh-mode, and I'm content with it-- No more zooming in on my pores.
Yeah! Let's do this!! No more zooming in !
i hate that fact that acne still makes me cry.... it sounds silly.... but anger, frustration, hitting a wall over and over again..... years later... all that adds up inside..... at the root, it's not the acne alone...... BUT when it comes back and i experience it again, it makes life a lot harder sometimes. uggghhhhhh.
then i remember.... how the hell did i deal with this last time?!?!?! bravery? strength? hope? self-love? <3
I have really bad PMS but I'm 99.999999999999999999999% clear. ARE YOU HEARING THIS? PMS is usually the most horrible time for my skin ever.
The only breakouts I have are beneath the hairline where it's difficult to apply the medication. But my face is clear. The regimen is awesome! PLEASE guys, if you haven't tried it, try it. If you've tried it before, try it again. This is my third time doing it and the BEST results I've seen out of all three times. This is better than the results I've seen a lot of people get with Accutane. Amazing. It's completely freed me of the emotional burden of acne. Occasionally when I do get a breakout I am not even bothered because I know it'll heal fast and there won't be more for a long time.
Thank God, thank God, thank God. TRY IT. 
I have really bad PMS but I'm 99.999999999999999999999% clear.
ARE YOU HEARING THIS? PMS is usually the most horrible time for my skin ever.
The only breakouts I have are beneath the hairline where it's difficult to apply the medication. But my face is clear. The regimen is awesome! PLEASE guys, if you haven't tried it, try it. If you've tried it before, try it again. This is my third time doing it and the BEST results I've seen out of all three times. This is better than the results I've seen a lot of people get with Accutane. Amazing. It's completely freed me of the emotional burden of acne. Occasionally when I do get a breakout I am not even bothered because I know it'll heal fast and there won't be more for a long time.
Thank God, thank God, thank God. TRY IT.
Congrats on your improvement!
I wish I could do the regimen... But unfortunately my skin type makes it impossible, enough for me to apply bp on some spots and they become so dry it cracks in in few days.
No appetite, no strength to go to school or socialize. It's raining a lot these days. I just want to starve myself and get into the hospital so that I can be away from all this and feel too bad physically to think. In two months I have to move out and I'll have nowhere to live, money is over and I can't take the student loan anymore, my boyfriend left me, my face is a mess... I want to sleep. A long dark sleep without any dreams.
You have so much left in life, Pianina. Time will pass and you will heal, inside and out. Have you tried getting a side job-- just an easy money type job? Like at a bookstore or a coffee place? It might keep you busy and make you feel good about making some money and improving on just you. Alone time is good for reflection, but too much can be painful. You will find someone else to make you feel happy and loved-- you're still so young and you're very beautiful. You have time, so don't give up yet. Life is not easy, but there is beauty in it, I promise. Keep your head up-- we are all rooting for you.
Hi there heitea, thanks for the encouragement. I have a part -time job, working as a piano teacher. Otherwise my studies takes much of my time, though it's really hard to focus and I missed out a lot recently. Eventually we decided to stay together with my boyfriend. It's very unstable and difficult, but maybe it will work out... He is going away for a whole year and it makes it even harder, but at the same time it's an ultimate challenge for us. Keep your fingers crossed for us, please...
No appetite, no strength to go to school or socialize. It's raining a lot these days. I just want to starve myself and get into the hospital so that I can be away from all this and feel too bad physically to think. In two months I have to move out and I'll have nowhere to live, money is over and I can't take the student loan anymore, my boyfriend left me, my face is a mess... I want to sleep. A long dark sleep without any dreams.
I totally understand where you're coming from, Pianina. Relationships are extra tough when you have skin issues, and I think it hurts even more when they end because of how those skin issues have already damaged our self-image/confidence. Stay strong and try to soldier through, the darkness can't last forever and you'll wake up one day and see light shining at the end of the tunnel. I've found a good night's sleep can really help, you wake up feeling refreshed and all those emotions you were feeling the day before are dulled down and easier to deal with.
Oh yeah, skin issues makes it all worse, when you can't even find comfort in your own body. It seems to be hostile towards you in some way...Sometimes I think I could deal with any problem much more efficiently if I knew it won't break me out. If I could be angry, sad, cry without being afraid that my face will expload... Just being myself even if I need to go through negatives emotions... You probably understand what I mean...
Feeling in limbo......wondering which treatment is next. Trying not to think about the future.....what future?
I feel so horrible about my skin. I just want to stay at home and cry. It's one of those days where I'd do anything to have clear skin. I'd take accutane without a second thought if I had it right next to me - and normally I don't like the idea of accutane. It's just everything is happening at once - a whole heap of different stresses and that's making my skin worse which is all just making me feel worse. I have to go for a uni related interview today to see about getting a placement as part of one of the courses I have to take next semester so I'm not looking forward to that. I'm worried about that course next semester - I'm worried my anxiety about my skin is going to sky rocket like it has whenever I've gotten a new job and then I will fail or pull out of the course... I'm also having to figure out what I'm doing after this degree. The plan was to start a masters of speech pathology but now I don't know if that's what I really want to be doing. And I don't know how to figure out what it is I should be doing. I guess I should see a psychologist about it all but that scares me too. As much as I know I should talk about it, I don't want to talk to someone about myself. I'm worried they'd put me on some sort of anxiety medication and I don't want that to screw up my skin more.
I've had more than enough of this. I'm so so sick of it all. I don't know what to do I'm hoping this is just another bad day though and it will pass...
I feel so horrible about my skin. I just want to stay at home and cry. It's one of those days where I'd do anything to have clear skin. I'd take accutane without a second thought if I had it right next to me - and normally I don't like the idea of accutane. It's just everything is happening at once - a whole heap of different stresses and that's making my skin worse which is all just making me feel worse. I have to go for a uni related interview today to see about getting a placement as part of one of the courses I have to take next semester so I'm not looking forward to that. I'm worried about that course next semester - I'm worried my anxiety about my skin is going to sky rocket like it has whenever I've gotten a new job and then I will fail or pull out of the course... I'm also having to figure out what I'm doing after this degree. The plan was to start a masters of speech pathology but now I don't know if that's what I really want to be doing. And I don't know how to figure out what it is I should be doing. I guess I should see a psychologist about it all but that scares me too. As much as I know I should talk about it, I don't want to talk to someone about myself. I'm worried they'd put me on some sort of anxiety medication and I don't want that to screw up my skin more.
I've had more than enough of this. I'm so so sick of it all. I don't know what to do I'm hoping this is just another bad day though and it will pass...
Wish I could give a real life hug . If you need someone to chat with me, let me be it! I like chatting and making people happy.
Had to get a wisdom tooth pulled out so thinking of that took over me thinking about my skin. Weird how that works. The dentist was actually a beautiful woman and she was so nice. Yea I know its her job to be nice but it felt good getting treated right. I felt normal. lol then she gave me the bill. Reality check.
Stay strong everyone! I wish I could respond to all the posts that show great sadness, but maybe a group message will have to do for now.
My acne is still the same I think, just less inflamed. Ironically, the only thing working for me right now is calamine lotion - no topicals ever worked for me. I guess my acne has identity crisis and thinks it's chickenpox.
I feel fantastic because like deja, I am 99% clear!
I spent years of my life obsessing over acne. The regimen works well for most people, if you modify it to your skins needs. I just bought the supplies for a good friend of mine and showed her how to use them, I have high hopes for her getting clear.
For me the regimen worked for 3 years until my hormones got out of whack. 4 months on birth control my skin was clear, and still is. No more cystic acne, no more pain, no more bdoy acne. Its all gone!
Last year, I was hidingin my house too ahsamed to go to the beach or take my son to the park without make-up.I was depressed and ashamed.
This year, I wear my hair back, tank tops, and its freedom, Baby! I only wish the best and the same for all of you on here.
Peace
On 4/23/2013 at 10:13 PM, dejaclairevoyant said:I have really bad PMS but I'm 99.999999999999999999999% clear.
The only breakouts I have are beneath the hairline where it's difficult to apply the medication. But my face is clear. The regimen is awesome! PLEASE guys, if you haven't tried it, try it. If you've tried it before, try it again. This is my third time doing it and the BEST results I've seen out of all three times. This is better than the results I've seen a lot of people get with Accutane. Amazing. It's completely freed me of the emotional burden of acne. Occasionally when I do get a breakout I am not even bothered because I know it'll heal fast and there won't be more for a long time.
Thank God, thank God, thank God. TRY IT.
I feel fantastic because like deja, I am 99% clear!
I spent years of my life obsessing over acne. The regimen works well for most people, if you modify it to your skins needs. I just bought the supplies for a good friend of mine and showed her how to use them, I have high hopes for her getting clear.
For me the regimen worked for 3 years until my hormones got out of whack. 4 months on birth control my skin was clear, and still is. No more cystic acne, no more pain, no more bdoy acne. Its all gone!
Last year, I was hiding in my house too ahsamed to go to the beach or take my son to the park without make-up.I was depressed and ashamed.
This year, I wear my hair back, tank tops, and its freedom, Baby! I only wish the best and the same for all of you on here.
Peace
On 4/23/2013 at 10:13 PM, dejaclairevoyant said:I have really bad PMS but I'm 99.999999999999999999999% clear.
The only breakouts I have are beneath the hairline where it's difficult to apply the medication. But my face is clear. The regimen is awesome! PLEASE guys, if you haven't tried it, try it. If you've tried it before, try it again. This is my third time doing it and the BEST results I've seen out of all three times. This is better than the results I've seen a lot of people get with Accutane. Amazing. It's completely freed me of the emotional burden of acne. Occasionally when I do get a breakout I am not even bothered because I know it'll heal fast and there won't be more for a long time.
Thank God, thank God, thank God. TRY IT.