I personally don't smile when I see scars on someones face dude... its not funny at all. Neither does it make me nervous.

i get the worst looks ...i can speak to women and they won't even speak back ...but i don't care i enjoy making myself look stupid ...i don't blame them though i'm not attracted to ugly people either

I hope everyone here with scarring can try subcision + suction at least once in their life time. It has changed my life completely.

OT: I was on a similar boat OP. But it's possible to over come with the right treatments.

You're not paranoid. It's real unfortunately. I find that strangers do indeed stare because they don't know you and don't care enough to spare your feelings. The people in your life do this mostly because they don't want you to realize that they are staring at your scars. They try to spare your feelings, but like you said, it makes you feel the exact opposite. It does mess with you psychologically and you get to a point where you wonder if they even see the person behind the scarring at all. It's hard to keep a conversation going with someone when you know 100% that they are scanning your face, often unconsciously. This next part don't laugh but.....The worst thing is, is that without the scarring I know I'd be considered better than average in looks. I've gotten the "oh what a shame about the skin because he would have been good looking." It's awful because you can tell when someone checks you out, but then have that look of shock / disappointment when they get a real up close look. Talk about soul-crushing.

Sadly, I think it's been confirmed by science too,where they found that in job interviews, applicants with noticeable scarring get hired less. The reason is not as simple as being repulsed by your scarring. Surprisingly, it's because they focus so much on the scarring that they actually do not hear a lot of what the applicant is saying and so their perception of them is that they were a weaker candidate due to information being tuned out.

So in summary, acne scars f*****g suck.

Thanks for all the feedback.

@blahblah82 - you're absolutely bang on the money! And I get what you're saying about the looks things...

It really is a savage existence, staying indoors to avoid all these situations. Eventually when I do get the courage to go out and get involved in social situations the same stuff happens and boom, back to square one...I'd rather stay in on my own than feel I was making people uncomfortable.

The only thing that actually keeps me going at the moment, is the hope of getting another treatment.

@robertitoo - I'm still on the hunt for this treatment in the UK for temples, and if I do find someone, it will be another 18 months until the fillers disappear.

This sounds like paranoia to me, and I have acne scars too. You probably have some confirmation bias because the smiling thing doesn't even sound like normal human behavior. Your scarring seems to mainly be in the temple area and even then it doesn't look horrible, and trust that I am way more critical of acne scarring because I have it myself.

And please, for christ sake, stop talking about the job interview thing, it's way overblown. It's only gonna make it so you become even more insecure when going into a job interview, and then you might lose an opportunity because of that.

Reading some of these replies makes it sound like acne scarring is the end of the world. A savage existence? Are you kidding me? We all want to improve our scars and our looks, but the fact that you stay indoors and isolate yourself is on you. There are plenty of people with worse acne scarring, or even way worse deformities than acne scarring, that are able to live normal lives.

I've seen presidents, athletes and actors with acne scarring. But please, isolate yourself and bully yourself psychologically until you're unable to function socially.

Sorry if I sound harsh but I just had to speak my mind.

I agree that life has to go on, and we cannot let it just totally defeat us and make us sink into a dark place. The question that was posed by the OP, however, is are these observations paranoia, and a lot of times it is true that people stare and make comments. I can only speak for myself, but there have been many rude ass people who have directly insulted me to my face, or thought I couldn't hear the comments they were making to their friends within earshot of me. I'm not advocating curling up into a ball and living in isolation. I'm simply stating that I have made these same observations myself. If anything, I'm one of those people on here who will directly call someone out for their melodramatic BS if they post a pic of a few tiny redmarks and say it's ruining their life. Now THAT to me is paranoia.

"Savage existence", was a fairly strong term I used, and I completely understand some people are in much worse situations. It doesn't make my situation easier though, any social situation now is a complete nightmare because of the way people look at me, that's all I'm saying.

I know the looks that I get are of discomfort from people, and people I don't know do often stare, or as you mentioned blahblah28 - people scan your face close up, and I know they don't realise they're doing it.

I agree, the smile thing is very obscure, I don't understand it myself, which is why I brought it to the internet. I'm definitely not imagining all these people smiling, because if I am, I've got some serious mental health issues. They are definitely smiling.

This is why I wanted to share my thoughts anyway, to hear different opinions and experiences, not for sympathy, because most of us are all working on the same page here. So, thanks for your input.

Ps. I also hope I didn't offend anyone by saying "savage existence". When I used that term I was referring to the anxiety I have at the moment, as opposed to actually acne scarring.

This sounds like paranoia to me, and I have acne scars too. You probably have some confirmation bias because the smiling thing doesn't even sound like normal human behavior. Your scarring seems to mainly be in the temple area and even then it doesn't look horrible, and trust that I am way more critical of acne scarring because I have it myself.

 

And please, for christ sake, stop talking about the job interview thing, it's way overblown. It's only gonna make it so you become even more insecure when going into a job interview, and then you might lose an opportunity because of that.

 

Reading some of these replies makes it sound like acne scarring is the end of the world. A savage existence? Are you kidding me? We all want to improve our scars and our looks, but the fact that you stay indoors and isolate yourself is on you. There are plenty of people with worse acne scarring, or even way worse deformities than acne scarring, that are able to live normal lives.

 

I've seen presidents, athletes and actors with acne scarring. But please, isolate yourself and bully yourself psychologically until you're unable to function socially.

 

Sorry if I sound harsh but I just had to speak my mind.

Sorry isn't good enough, and you do indeed sound harsh. I don't think this forum is really the sort of forum you can speak your mind, especially when it isn't about yourself.

If someone is posting for sympathy, then so what, don't put the poor person down even more....

OP: I believe you are from the UK right? Are you aware of free scar treatment on the NHS? PM me if you need any help.

I'm merely trying to find out if other people get the same sort of reactions from people that I know I do, and if those reactions from people are because they are nervous looking at me. That's all I wanted to know, as I don't understand the looking down and smiling thing, it's been freaking me out.

blahblah82 absolutely nailed it with his first comment in my opinion. I now know other people experience this and I'm not going mental, at least.

- I am from the UK yes, I had laser treatment on the NHS years ago but that made it a lot worse unfortunately. I've spent 2k + in the last 9 or so months getting treatment...I'm getting there, I think...ha!

- I am from the UK yes, I had laser treatment on the NHS years ago but that made it a lot worse unfortunately. I've spent 2k + in the last 9 or so months getting treatment...I'm getting there, I think...ha!

What treatment did you have? I presume laser? Is so and it's fraxel, which type - Repair or Re:Store?

 

- I am from the UK yes, I had laser treatment on the NHS years ago but that made it a lot worse unfortunately. I've spent 2k + in the last 9 or so months getting treatment...I'm getting there, I think...ha!

 

What treatment did you have? I presume laser? Is so and it's fraxel, which type - Repair or Re:Store?

It was about 6 or 7 years ago. They just called it a co2 laser. The surgeon went in full blown, which left me with an open wound for about a month, I now have an orange peel texture from it, it looks like a bad burn when it gets to the later stages of the day. It's not so bad in the morning.

I want to try and stay away from lasers now I think. I've had derma-fillers and skin boosters now, so my options for more treatments are limited for another 18 months.

I hate to derail the OP's thread any further....

Lucas, I didn't start this topic, and I certainly am not self-pitying. First of all, the clear difference is that I've expended an incredible amount of my own resources learning, and failed multiple times through trial and error with countless treatments. I've read and learned from others on this board. I didn't start this thread, and what I was doing was simply commiserating with the OP because I thought he made a good observation. I thought it was important to let him know that he's not alone in those observations, and that people do judge harshly sometimes. If I sat around and did nothing, then perhaps you might have a point. I think in your situation, many people have tried to give you constructive advice, but you have shot down everything others suggest and then got into some diatribe about how classist and elitist it was to assume that everyone could afford medical treatment. Your tone was aggressive towards people simply telling you what worked for them. What I was trying to say in the other thread, perhaps not very elegantly, is that it's fine to vent but you need to take some action and don't be so defensive when others try to help. They've walked down the road before.

Anyway, I'm done with it.

 

This sounds like paranoia to me, and I have acne scars too. You probably have some confirmation bias because the smiling thing doesn't even sound like normal human behavior. Your scarring seems to mainly be in the temple area and even then it doesn't look horrible, and trust that I am way more critical of acne scarring because I have it myself.

 

And please, for christ sake, stop talking about the job interview thing, it's way overblown. It's only gonna make it so you become even more insecure when going into a job interview, and then you might lose an opportunity because of that.

 

Reading some of these replies makes it sound like acne scarring is the end of the world. A savage existence? Are you kidding me? We all want to improve our scars and our looks, but the fact that you stay indoors and isolate yourself is on you. There are plenty of people with worse acne scarring, or even way worse deformities than acne scarring, that are able to live normal lives.

 

I've seen presidents, athletes and actors with acne scarring. But please, isolate yourself and bully yourself psychologically until you're unable to function socially.

 

Sorry if I sound harsh but I just had to speak my mind.

 

Sorry isn't good enough, and you do indeed sound harsh. I don't think this forum is really the sort of forum you can speak your mind, especially when it isn't about yourself.

 

If someone is posting for sympathy, then so what, don't put the poor person down even more....

 

OP: I believe you are from the UK right? Are you aware of free scar treatment on the NHS? PM me if you need any help.

How am I putting him down?

Yeah, sorry that I'm one of the few people here that can see that this whole discussion is way overblown. Maybe you should try what they do in Fight Club, go visit some support groups for people who are truly suffering from terrible things, and realize how small your problems really are. It's all relative, yes. But the fact that some here develop serious anxiety, social disorders and depression from something that is absolutely not justified is the real problem. My best advice for OP is to go see a psychiatrist.

If there's anything that is harsh to OP, it's all of you agreeing with him and sharing his view of how horrible life is, that'll make him feel great! OP, I have scars too, and although I dislike them and view them as ugly, I can still live a normal life, have fun, have friends, socialise etc. You need to treat your psychological issues, because you don't have to isolate yourself, it is a problem way worse than scarring on your face.

You know, you can all cozy up in this forum and self-loath all you want, but my experiences with acne scarring matters too. So either you only listen to people who say living with acne scarring is horrible, or you can listen to people like me, and deal with it. I'm not saying you shouldn't get your scars treated, but working on your mindset is very, very important.

The thing is, that the people that truly deal with their scarring and live their lives normally, are not gonna be on this forum. That's why you're gonna get a very different world view on here. You can call it bullshit or whatever, I'm only sharing my experiences.

@faultlessfire

I didn't in any way self-loath if you read my very first post, nothing in it suggests any sympathy votes.

It was playing on my mind particularly last night, various situations that have happened throughout the years, so I was intrigued to find out what other people thought, if they had experienced the same thing. That is all.

I certainly do not spend my time hiding away from life, I have a lot of friends and I try to socialise as much as I can. But I'll be honest, quite a lot of the time I will avoid certain social situations, last night was one of those nights, hence the post. Obviously that is something I need to overcome, which again, is why I created the post in the first place.

Ah, sorry. I wasn't talking about you specifically when I said that. It's just the feeling I get from a lot of people on this forum.

That said, the smiling thing doesn't make any sense to me. Sure it's not just confirmation bias? You're looking for that reaction and they're probably smiling because of something else. It has nothing to do with scarring, it wouldn't make sense for anyone to do that in any situation unless you got some funny tattoo on your face or something. I don't know what to say really, it's just such an oddly specific reaction and it doesn't sound normal. Your scarring isn't even bad, honestly. After those fillers you had it's barely noticeable. That's why I think this is more of a psychological issue.

I have a friend with full blown cystic acne (way more noticable than any scarring) and when I'm around him no one acts awkward around him or looks away or anything. I've not noticed any weird looks or anything either with my scarring which I have on my cheeks, temples and forehead.

@faultlessfire

 

I didn't in any way self-loath if you read my very first post, nothing in it suggests any sympathy votes.

 

It was playing on my mind particularly last night, various situations that have happened throughout the years, so I was intrigued to find out what other people thought, if they had experienced the same thing. That is all.

 

I certainly do not spend my time hiding away from life, I have a lot of friends and I try to socialise as much as I can. But I'll be honest, quite a lot of the time I will avoid certain social situations, last night was one of those nights, hence the post. Obviously that is something I need to overcome, which again, is why I created the post in the first place.

And it's perfectly normal (edit: to questions your self) because a lot of people do it anyways, mostly everybody has insecurities of some sort.

But the fact that some here develop serious anxiety, social disorders and depression from something that is absolutely not justified is the real problem. My best advice for OP is to go see a psychiatrist.

Yeah, absolutely not justified.

Ah, yes. The common acne scarring that most people on this forum suffer from right there. How could I forget?

Obviously I was talking about the majority, the people here who have scarring that isn't that noticeable, OP for example. I've seen countless of posts where people state their lives are ruined etc and the scarring isn't even bad. But no, you just assume I'm talking about the most extreme, rarely EVER seen, acne scarring. Those pictures aren't even from people on here, they're just the worst case scenario you went and found online, good job.

You know that some people die from the common cold too right? Guess we shouldn't talk about that lightly ever again.

You don't know how bad people's scarring is unless they post pics, assuming that the majority of people posting/lurking here have minor or insignificant scarring because some of them have freaked out over superficial scarring or hyperpigmentation is logically fallacious. Also, its often difficult to properly gauge the appearance of scarring in images, they may look a lot better in 2D than they do in person.

Anyway, I posted the above images to point out that there IS in fact a certain threshold of scarring after which you can't just "get over it", we are hard-wired to be unsettled or even repulsed by scarring, especially scarring caused by disease, perhaps this is an instinct honed by natural selection to protect us from infectious disease or to prefer outwardly healthier mates. Pretending otherwise is delusional and unhelpful.

The most severe acne scarring tends to coincide with accutane usage due to the way it can inhibit wound healing, and given that quite a few people here have scarred while on accutane its not unreasonable to assume that a respectable portion of them ended up with some pretty disfiguring scarring, be it limited to just one area or their entire face. A lot of them won't post pics, so you'd be wise not to prejudge those who have been utterly crippled by their condition as being irrational.

The most severe acne scarring tends to coincide with accutane usage due to the way it can inhibit wound healing, and given that quite a few people here have scarred while on accutane its not unreasonable to assume that a respectable portion of them ended up with some pretty disfiguring scarring, be it limited to just one area or their entire face.

Are there actual studies of this? I'm genuinely asking, not trying to make a point. You say the most severe scarring tends to coincide with Accutane usage, maybe that is because people with the most severe acne are the ones that get Accutane.

I don't believe one bit in that we are hard-wired to be repulsed by scarring. Before I had acne scars I didn't even know what acne scarring was. I didn't notice it in several people who I see it very clearly in now. And once again, not taking about the severe kind above.

Are there actual studies of this? I'm genuinely asking, not trying to make a point. You say the most severe scarring tends to coincide with Accutane usage, maybe that is because people with the most severe acne are the ones that get Accutane.

You may have a point, its been established wisdom for quite some time that isotretinoin may impair wound healing in some people, and this has been bolstered by countless anecdotal accounts. However, recent studies suggest this might not necessarily be the case, but we can't say for certain so its better to be safe than sorry.

Experienced plastic surgeons say yes: http://www.realself.com/question/how-long-off-accutane-revision-rhinoplasty-surgery

I don't believe one bit in that we are hard-wired to be repulsed by scarring. Before I had acne scars I didn't even know what acne scarring was. I didn't notice it in several people who I see it very clearly in now. And once again, not taking about the severe kind above.

Well, there is scarring and there is scarring, clearly the most jarring kind is what is going to trigger that reaction. The fact that people here have experienced others noticing and commenting on their damaged faces shows how apparent it can be.

Accutane may impair wound healing due to it's ability to dramatically shrink sebaceous glands. I agree, however, that it is more likely that the people who use Accutane are the ones with the most severe scarring forms of Acne. It is also possible that people with severe acne also have a genetic defect in the way they heal, which is why they scar so badly to begin with and it's being incorrectly attributed to the Accutane. Correlation does not mean causation. That said, I believe the fear over Accutane is often WAY overblown and irrational. Personally, Accutane saved my skin from getting even more scarred than it already was.

I'll admit, I do get frustrated easily with people on here who post pictures of their minor scarring and claim that it has upended their lives. I think most of them know it's not bad, but are seeking validation (albeit in a very disingenuous, childish way). I agree with Factoid, after a certain threshold of acne scarring, it is hard to simply "get over it." FaultlessFire, I know you stated that because of your own acne scarring, you are actually more scrutinizing of scarring than the average person. Actually, I think that because all of us here suffer from acne scars we have a more realistic and nuanced view of what constitutes mild vs. severe scarring. We have all done so much research and seen so many pictures of acne scarring, that we know what TRULY severe acne scarring looks like. It's become normalized for us to see these levels of scarring. The average person on the street does not have this nuanced view, so to them TempleofDoom's scarring might very well be considered severe, even though to us we know that it isn't even anywhere near the pictures above. The average person who does not suffer acne scars would never even think of searching for such shocking pictures like the ones above to begin with.

I don't think it's self-pitying to discuss out in the open things that we know are the truth. People do comment and bully people for visible differences. Think of how many times we've heard people slam someone for being fat, short, bald, or whatever. AND all of those things are extremely COMMONPLACE. If people have the capacity to be cruel over things like that, why is it so hard to believe that people can be especially cruel about a condition like acne scarring (which is actually not common at all).

I for one, can relate to TempleofDoom's feelings. If we only had to deal with the occasional asshole here and there who makes a rude comment, I think most of us could brush it off. That said, if one's scarring is severe enough that people stare and comment everywhere, even the strongest person gets worn down over time. And remember, our metric for what's severe is not the same as the general public. We're only human.