being told to kill yourself because you are so ugly isn't just my twisted perception of the world. it actually physically happened to me. a person actually felt like they had the right to tell me that for whatever reason. as if i wasn't human or worthy of anything but death. many other people have said similar things like that in different variations and again it wasn't me having a negative perception of the world. it actually happened. i have also had to get into physical confrontations with people just to keep some sort of self worth and pride. it is all very tiring.
reading other peoples posts and stories here I would have to only assume things aren't better in other peoples neighborhoods. i guess it is basically human nature. it is unfair to some of us. some of you can still skate by in life and be positive which is awesome. good for you! but please excuse us if some of us get angry.
(((hugs))) Frank*L
It makes me so sad to hear what you and so many of us have had to put up with from nasty people just because we have a skin condition.
you're an awesome person ibiza thanks for the love! its all good
A kid once told me that he'd like to step on my face because it reminded him of the moon.He wanted to be another Neil Armstrong! HAHA
you should of punched dude in the face for making an empty threat and for being a sh*ty comedian.
being told to kill yourself because you are so ugly isn't just my twisted perception of the world. it actually physically happened to me. a person actually felt like they had the right to tell me that for whatever reason. as if i wasn't human or worthy of anything but death. many other people have said similar things like that in different variations and again it wasn't me having a negative perception of the world. it actually happened. i have also had to get into physical confrontations with people just to keep some sort of self worth and pride. it is all very tiring.
reading other peoples posts and stories here I would have to only assume things aren't better in other peoples neighborhoods. i guess it is basically human nature. it is unfair to some of us. some of you can still skate by in life and be positive which is awesome. good for you! but please excuse us if some of us get angry.
(((hugs))) Frank*L
It makes me so sad to hear what you and so many of us have had to put up with from nasty people just because we have a skin condition.
you're an awesome person ibiza thanks for the love! its all good
>A kid once told me that he'd like to step on my face because it reminded him of the moon.He wanted to be another Neil Armstrong! HAHA
you should of punched dude in the face for making an empty threat and for being a sh*ty comedian.
Well he was like 9... :/ Kids can be so callous ...
"dirty! nasty! like really loud so everyone can hear. . I just ignored her and said to myself "ha ha ", "who cares so what everyone knows. (cognitive-behavioral therapy for the win)
this one lady had to get up out of chair and said "jesus christ" told a coworker about my skin. I told myself who cares, I made you get off of your chair, haha. do what you want, took a deep breath calmed myself down and said so what! who cares what the say!
I was walking down the hallway some girl said "annoying out loud when she walked past me. I laughed and said so what who cares, I cant control other people, I can only control myself. and who cares.
if you keep doing this simple concept, any negative comments will automatically trigger a "so what" "who cares," calm yourself, why do I care what they think? why would I let them affect me, nothing I can do,
"dirty! nasty! like really loud so everyone can hear. . I just ignored her and said to myself "ha ha ", "who cares so what everyone knows. (cognitive-behavioral therapy for the win)
this one lady had to get up out of chair and said "jesus christ" told a coworker about my skin. I told myself who cares, I made you get off of your chair, haha. do what you want, took a deep breath calmed myself down and said so what! who cares what the say!
I was walking down the hallway some girl said "annoying out loud when she walked past me. I laughed and said so what who cares, I cant control other people, I can only control myself. and who cares.
if you keep doing this simple concept, any negative comments will automatically trigger a "so what" "who cares," calm yourself, why do I care what they think? why would I let them affect me, nothing I can do,
Yes i like this idea similar to mine exept i don't use word like "whatever,who cares". mine are a bit more uhh stronger lol. but hey glad this strategy works for you!
When I was in year 8, this guy who I was good friends with used to count my spots whenever he saw me, which encouraged other people to do it too. My acne wasn't severe, but I felt so self conscious about it! What really annoyed me was the fact that he always had perfect skin, so didn't understand why it upset me so much.
I've never really had anyone walk up to my face and insult me, but I did have a group of friends that kinda pinned me as the "unattractive" guy in the group. But that was when I was like 16 - 17 and just starting college. 3 years down the line and my friends are asking me why I get hit on by girls so much when we go out drinking. Funny world eh?
One time my best friend said "you gotta get rid of that shit man, thats gross" although he most likely meant it moreso as advice rather than an insult.
Back in high school, a kid did a rap in the cafeteria, one of his lines was "when I look at this kid all i see is a sheet of paper with red dots" right in front of everyone. At the time I honestly didnt even care what people thought about me, but shit I sure did in the years to come.
Sometimes its not even what people say; its resorting to telling people that the cyst on the side of your face is a bug bite or some dumb shit like that to justify whats happening.
In the past:
"It must be your diet, there is no way you're eating natural foods with skin like that"
"You should really wear makeup, I don't know why you choose to expose your skin"
"You have no idea how to take care of your skin, do you?"
"You're obviously not listening to your doctor, your skin would have cleared up now if you actually followed the advice"
"I can't possibly imagine how much artificial food you stuff inside your body on a daily basis for your skin to look the way it it does"
"I don't believe that you're eating as healthy as you say you do, skin mirrors our internal health - and yours is completely unhealthy"
1)My ex boyfriend said to me when we got breakup:
~ they say the real beauty is inside,no,inside is something ugly
2)Don't go to the dermatologist anymore.
3)And the most painful comes from my mother, she ask me to find some guy to be my bf.
4)My bestfriend(also my rival maybe) said that someone is beautiful when she got no acnes on her face.
Hurts.
-It really irks me when someone is talking to me, sees the scars on my face and starts scratching their faces on the same places where my scars are most visible.
-My dear grandmother ~ god bless her, she's in her 80's and she would always say nonchalantly "your face is clear now." It really makes me not want to visit her sometimes. I just don't want to hear people discuss my face publicly.
-What my cousin said to his sister, "don't pick your pimple, or you'll look like Dmitri".
-in school, some professor would always bring up this question, "are you comfortable in your own skin?" and the some girls in the class would turn to look at me.
I tried to not care about what people say but it really adds up over time and takes a toll on you.
outside of my family and one of my best friends pesky older brother, no one has ever pointed out my acne until this winter.
safe to say my self confidence has completely shattered to nothing because all this time i thought foundation was doing the trick
little boy: what happened to YOU? pimples!!
lady: *slips me a note that says to cut out dairy for my acne* call me ive got more tips
old man: what happened to your face?
crazy b*tch at train station: you need some proactiv!!
its not even the fact that they are talking about my skin. of course i know i have acne. hearing it out loud just makes me want to break down and never look at another person in the eye ever again.
When I was 11 I started getting spots, nothing major but I was among the first in my class to receive the gift of teenage hormones. A girl was angry at me for some reason, think I saw her take something, she said "well! at least I don't have green spots on my face! you're so gross to look at". Just for the record, my spots were not green haha but I guess one had some white head that was yellow tinted.
Karma hit a few years later, she developed very serious acne and had it throughout her teens.
More recently a friend said I really need to 'just wash my face with normal soap, you know, just wash your face'. Yeah if it was only that simple...ironically she's struggling with acne but is in complete denial....
"Gross! What is that on his face? Is he diseased?"
I have been on Retin A Micro for two months and had left me with hyperpigmentation. Really pissed me off when I heard the comments, but they were made by some moronic university students. Sucks to be asian. Hyperpigmentation takes a while to go away sadly.
One of my mates got 'volcano face' once, which is just horrible.
Someone told me to wash my face, haha. Ooohh, who would of thought that washing your face would help acne, what an eye-opener./: It's always the people that have never had a pimle in their life that suddenly seem to know everything about acne and when they see someone with acne they just have to 'help'.
/rant finished, haha.
Well,I don't really remember,I always wore make up and after 2 cources of accutane and 2 years of bc,I mostly had scars.Its now that I stoped the pill that things are real difficult again!
But around when I was 14 I remember a guy in my school that we always fought told me "its a shame,such beautiful eyes with a face like that"
And the boyfriend of my best friend told me I could play ugly betty easily,without special make up.(surprise,3 years later he actually wanted to be with me).
I stumbled across this forum and after reading for hours, I decided to make an account and share my experiences.
The past year and a half has been absolute hell for me. Before this, I had VERY mild acne. I would maybe have one pimple a month or so, and always in the same place, the side of my nose. I went to the dermatologist and was give a retinoid. She didn't give me any instructions on how to use it, so I CAKED it on every night like a complete dumbass. After a few weeks, I looked like I came out of the oven at Pizza Hut. When I went back to the doctor, she literally said "What the hell happened?" At first, I was convinced that this was just the medicine running it's proper course, and it didn't effect me at all. Sadly, that didn't last long because I guess I have a lot of assholes in my life, go figure (half sarcastic)
Anyways, I have always been a fairly confident person and people have always seen me as confident. I have never had any trouble with girls, not that I ever placed much importance on that, seeing as I have had the same girlfriend since 8th grade and am now a freshman in college. But, I have struggled so much this past year and a half with just simple things, like, I don't know, going outside?
Okay, so the first comment I got, was about a week out of the dermatological oven (Just so that everyone knows, I use this terminology in a self-deprecating sort of way. I do not mean to offend anyone that has severe acne, because, trust me, it can't get much worse than what mine was.) This comment was from my morbidly obese (I also don't want to offend anyone with weight problems, I just wanted to describe him honestly, so that you can better understand the situation.) older cousin, who has always had a strange fascination with publically humiliating me. This comment was during a very busy, early morning visit to Village Inn and was overheard by virtually all surrounding parties. I knew that he was going to say something to me about it, so I looked down and didn't say anything for the entire meal. But, of course, they asked me why I wasn't saying anything, and I looked up to answer, granted he had definitely already noticed my face at that point, but right when I looked up "Jesus, what happened to your face? It looks like you rolled it in pepperoni. Ever heard of proactiv?"
The second comment was actually from my best friend. We were on our way to the comic book shop (acne stereotype?) after breakfast. I said something to him, along the lines of "Man, my skin is looking pretty bad." I said this, because, I noticed that he was having trouble saying anything to me at all, and looking at me. I honestly thought that he would try to comfort me. Without skipping a beat, he replied "I know, I was going to say something before, but it's SUPER noticeable. I was going to say that you look like the zombie on the cover of Dawn of the Dead." I let him know that this comment destroyed the interiors of my soul, and that there was absolutely no way for me to recover from it, and he felt really bad and bought me some comics.
Sadly, this wasn't the last time my best friend and my cousin made comments about my face. We were all playing the card game Apples to Apples (if you don't know what it is, look it up, because I don't know if you've noticed, but I am WAY overly descriptive.) The adjective card was messy, and when the card was laid down, once again my obese cousin jumped at the chance to say under his breath "Your face." That stings. Another time was when my friend asked to use me as a reference for a drawing he was doing, he did a quick little sketch of a generic face, and then just started putting dots all over the cheeks and looked up at me and chuckled. Thanks, dick. Also, I swear that there were times that he was trying to get pictures of my face when I wasn't looking, to show people that I used to hangout with what a horrible monster I am now, but maybe I am just paranoid.
Those were the biggest blows to my confidence. After that, I didn't leave my house, except to buy comics and play pool, for ten months. I couldn't look people in the eyes, I would hide when people came over to the house. Whenever I looked in the mirror, I would become filled with rage and start to cry. I know, how vain. But man, this was devastating.
Gradually, I started to leave the house more and more, I went to movies, and out to eat at certain restaurants. But I would constantly be trying to hide my face. If I saw someone that I hadn't seen for a while, I would have a panice attack and almost shut down. It was seriously hell. Whenever I would go out to a movie, I would sit and constantly worry that there would be a line about acne in the film. I will give a few examples where this did actually happen, and I almost disintegrated in my seat out of fear of someone saying something about my face. 1. In 007 Skyfall, James Bond tells Q that he can't trust him to be competent at his job, he still has spots (referring to hyperpigmentation, I assume.) To which Q replies, "My complexion is hardly relevent." 2. In Pain and Gain, Tony Shalhoub's character is an asshole boss, and he yells at his employees at his restaurant for being overweight and having pimples all over their faces.
My relationships with friends and family took detrimental blows, to the point where my girlfriend and I broke up. We have been together for so long and it was really hard for me. When that happened I realised that I needed to have confidence again, for the betterment of my life. My friend and I started going out to parties and trying to pick up girls. I pushed myself very far out of my hermit-like comfort zone. I talked to girls, made new friends and had TONS of new experiences. Sadly though, when I would start to drink alcohol, which I never do, all I could talk about was my terrible acne. It was a damn mess. I really learned a lot about myself and about other people in this time. I have always been extremely cynical, but now I am much more open to the human race and the possibility of good people. Luckily, my girlfriend and I got back together and our relationship has grown much stronger because of all of this.
In the past few months I have gotten a lot better, I have almost stopped caring entirely. Although I do now have scars all over my face, and dark red marks, I don't let it bother me as much. I have a new dermatologist that has helped me a lot, and I just feel a lot better about my life in general! But, one day, I went to the bank with my girlfriend to start a new bank account. There were mirrors everywhere in this bank, and I just felt really self conscioius. My girlfriend and I were pretty much the only people in there other than the very hefty staff behind the front counter of the bank. They all just seemed to be standing around talking. When we were approaching the front counter, I made eye contact with one of the male employees (Oh no, alpha male time.) The next thing I heard out of his mouth was "Someone order pizza?" and every member of the staff began to laugh and try to look away from me. I was so offended and devastated, I was shaking. I stood there, running over scenarios and they all seemed ridiculous. Especially because my girlfriend hadn't even noticed that they said anything. She was absolutely oblivious to the whole ordeal. I came to the conclusion that this was a pivotal point in my existence. I knew that the best defense in this situation was to stand up straight and proud and smile sincerely. Also, my girlfriend is pretty damn hot, so, this guy was definitely jealous, probably trying to figure out why she is with me. What a douche.
I apologize to anyone who has read this, or anyone that decided to skip over it because of it's annoying length. This will probably be my first and final post, so I thought I would make it count. I would like everyone to know that this website has helped me a tremendous amount throughout my struggle and I am so happy that it exists. Thank you all!