Hey Avalati, first of all know that you're not alone in your struggles with acne.  Now that you've written your feelings down I encourage you to make your parents read this and hopefully they will begin to understand and there will be a way forward for you to seek some prescription treatments for your acne.  Don't quit your cosplay hobby...it's important to have that fun in your life.  Please do seek some support from one of the organisations that provide free phone counselling

Sending hugs your way!!!!  You look like you could use them!!!! xoxoxo

I agree with Jazzguy. Never give up the things that bring you joy. Those are the things that make life worth living. Clear skin is possible!!!!! Whether through prescription, or even giving something like the Acne.Org Regimen a go, effective treatment options are out there. My son's face was covered in cystic acne this past winter. He's got some scarring but he's been clear for several months, thanks to a combo of antibiotics and the Regimen. And the scars are fading too, getting better with every passing month, so we're very thankful. Noticed a few days ago that all his PIH is gone, just left with some rolling scars, a few boxcars. He couldn't be happier to be acne-free. Don't give up hope!!! Clear skin is possible!!!!

If you can't convince your parents to allow you to see a dermatologist, do you have a college counsellor you could talk to? Perhaps they could then approach your parents with a concern for you.

Don't give up on the things you love, it's during the times you feel down that you need those things the most. Treat cosplay as a time to take a break from yourself, a break from the negative and a break from the worries.

On 11/20/2016 at 3:41 PM, Jazzguy said:

Hey Avalati, first of all know that you're not alone in your struggles with acne.  Now that you've written your feelings down I encourage you to make your parents read this and hopefully they will begin to understand and there will be a way forward for you to seek some prescription treatments for your acne.  Don't quit your cosplay hobby...it's important to have that fun in your life.  Please do seek some support from one of the organisations that provide free phone counselling

Thank you so much... I don't know if I'm ready to tell my parents all of this, they often dismiss it whenever I bring up acne. My dad offers to go buy "medicine" and my mom tells me to "drink more water" (and I have lol). There was one point where I had a really bad cystic acne on my chin, and as a flute player, it became incredibly painful whenever I tried to practice (that's exactly where you place the flute), and my mom forced me to and it just aggravated the cyst further... But I'll bring it up again and I'll consider counseling, thank you!!
 

On 11/20/2016 at 8:08 PM, DeLovely said:

Sending hugs your way!!!!  You look like you could use them!!!! xoxoxo

I agree with Jazzguy. Never give up the things that bring you joy. Those are the things that make life worth living. Clear skin is possible!!!!! Whether through prescription, or even giving something like the Acne.Org Regimen a go, effective treatment options are out there. My son's face was covered in cystic acne this past winter. He's got some scarring but he's been clear for several months, thanks to a combo of antibiotics and the Regimen. And the scars are fading too, getting better with every passing month, so we're very thankful. Noticed a few days ago that all his PIH is gone, just left with some rolling scars, a few boxcars. He couldn't be happier to be acne-free. Don't give up hope!!! Clear skin is possible!!!!

Thank you so much : ' ))!!! I want to try the acne.org regimen but its a lot of money for something I don't know will work, and I don't have any income besides from my parents right now... But hopefully I can try it eventually.
 

On 11/21/2016 at 5:46 PM, Hominid said:

If you can't convince your parents to allow you to see a dermatologist, do you have a college counsellor you could talk to? Perhaps they could then approach your parents with a concern for you.

Don't give up on the things you love, it's during the times you feel down that you need those things the most. Treat cosplay as a time to take a break from yourself, a break from the negative and a break from the worries.

My school does have counseling, but I'm very anxious/intimidated to talk to anybody about this. But I might try, and yeah hopefully they can convince my parents it's a serious problem.
And thank you... I don't think I'll actually stop cosplaying but it does cause a lot of stress because it's extremely important I have as-clear-as-possible skin on convention weekends, because I do photoshoots;; But it does still give me a lot of confidence and happiness nonetheless! 

I really feel for you. Sending you a lot of love. Remember we are all here to support you and help you whenever you feel low.

Clear skin is possible. Many of the people here have cured the most severe of their acne, so don't worry. Just make sure acne does not change your personality. You are young and have a great wonderful life yet ahead of you.

18 hours ago, avalati said:

My school does have counseling, but I'm very anxious/intimidated to talk to anybody about this. But I might try, and yeah hopefully they can convince my parents it's a serious problem.

Counselors are there for a reason. They are there to listen, to advise, and to help.

If you think you will struggle to talk about things why not write it all down in a letter beforehand, then have a quick chat with your counselor to arrange a meeting and pass them the letter in advance. They will then be able to meet with you already having an understanding of how you feel, and they can lead the conversation and take the pressure off you to get every single thought and feeling out at once. At the very least, writing all your feelings down can be quite a cathartic experience in itself.

Please don't put it off, you don't have to suffer any longer. Nobody deserves to feel so controlled and trapped by something that can be treated.

I'm so sorry you feel upset. You're not alone in this struggle, trust me. I used to have relatively normal skin too until I developed a hormone imbalance. This makes me wonder if the same thing has happened to you. When does your acne get worse -- around ovulation and right before your period? Is your skin super oily in your T-zone? How about any excess hair, downy or coarse? Back/chest/neck/jaw acne? That's all indicative of hormone-fueled acne. And there is treatment for that kind of acne. I used to be so resistant to taking drugs and just tried to solve it through OTC stuff and diet and it never helped me, either. It was just not enough to help fix the hormone imbalance created from a pill that was wrong for me.

If you don't think your acne is hormonal, you could probably benefit from a course of Accutane. It's a big decision and you need to definitely talk it over with your family and doctor. However, it sounds like acne is starting to rule your life, so if I were in your shoes, I would just go for it to get my life back. I am on Spiro 50 mg a day now because my acne is definitely hormonal, but it's similar to Accutane in that it dries up all your excess sebum and it's been working well for me. Whether you're taking Spiro or Accutane or the pill, these treatments do take time and have their faults but they are better than suffering.

It seems like you feel upset and hopeless, but trust me, there is hope. There will be a cure, but in the meanwhile, do not lose sight of who you are (like your very interesting hobby! You seem like a talented young woman). I've attached my post below about how to rationally deal with an "acne crisis." Although I know "finding a cure" for acne is important, this thread is about the emotional and psychological effects of acne, and these are two different things. Finding a curse is only fixing half the problem- the other, more important half, is regaining your confidence, and this is possible, even when you're not completely clear! Think about it this way: worrying about acne is not productive. Meaning, you do not gain anything positive from it. Yo only lose precious time and self-confidence. Based on our thoughts, we can actually change the way we see the world. For example, if you say to yourself, "I am boring and sad and lonely" everyday, you will be gloomy, and fewer people will want to talk to you- it's a self-fulfilling prophecy, do you see what I mean? But if you say, "Despite my acne, I am beautiful! I won't let a genetic predisposition rule my life, the only life I have been given." You will be positive, make friends, and trust me NOBODY in the universe cares more about your acne than YOU do. People will love spendng time around someone who is positive and confident, so chin up you are worth more than your appearance.

http://www.acne.org/messageboard/topic/364481-a-rational-approach-to-acne/

Hey there! Please take a look at my blog post. I feel it will really help you. Much love!
http://www.acne.org/messageboard/blogs/entry/32202-how-to-heal/

,

On 11/23/2016 at 9:59 AM, Ae1976 said:

I really feel for you. Sending you a lot of love. Remember we are all here to support you and help you whenever you feel low. 

Clear skin is possible. Many of the people here have cured the most severe of their acne, so don't worry. Just make sure acne does not change your personality. You are young and have a great wonderful life yet ahead of you. 
 

Thank you!!! I really appreciate it. Acne's already changed my personality though and it's killing me
 

On 11/23/2016 at 3:08 PM, Hominid said:

Counselors are there for a reason. They are there to listen, to advise, and to help.

If you think you will struggle to talk about things why not write it all down in a letter beforehand, then have a quick chat with your counselor to arrange a meeting and pass them the letter in advance. They will then be able to meet with you already having an understanding of how you feel, and they can lead the conversation and take the pressure off you to get every single thought and feeling out at once. At the very least, writing all your feelings down can be quite a cathartic experience in itself.

Please don't put it off, you don't have to suffer any longer. Nobody deserves to feel so controlled and trapped by something that can be treated.

That's very true. Posting this has helped tbh. I haven't talked to anyone about this besides my bf though, but I'll try to see a counselor. 
 

On 11/23/2016 at 3:15 PM, cloudydreamer said:

I'm so sorry you feel upset. You're not alone in this struggle, trust me. I used to have relatively normal skin too until I developed a hormone imbalance. This makes me wonder if the same thing has happened to you. When does your acne get worse -- around ovulation and right before your period? Is your skin super oily in your T-zone? How about any excess hair, downy or coarse? Back/chest/neck/jaw acne? That's all indicative of hormone-fueled acne. And there is treatment for that kind of acne. I used to be so resistant to taking drugs and just tried to solve it through OTC stuff and diet and it never helped me, either. It was just not enough to help fix the hormone imbalance created from a pill that was wrong for me.

If you don't think your acne is hormonal, you could probably benefit from a course of Accutane. It's a big decision and you need to definitely talk it over with your family and doctor. However, it sounds like acne is starting to rule your life, so if I were in your shoes, I would just go for it to get my life back. I am on Spiro 50 mg a day now because my acne is definitely hormonal, but it's similar to Accutane in that it dries up all your excess sebum and it's been working well for me. Whether you're taking Spiro or Accutane or the pill, these treatments do take time and have their faults but they are better than suffering. 

Uhh yeah I do think it's probably hormonal : (. It's not always during my period but it does seem connected to it (usually my skin is at it's worse about a week after my period?). And yeah most of my breakouts are around my nose, chin, and eyebrows (and i have forehead acne but I think that's just bc of my my bangs lol but its not a big deal to me its a lot more minor than the stuff in the center of my face). And yep I have mild-moderate chest and back acne too. Where can I get treatment for this? I hear about people taking birth control, but I haven't heard of and I don't know what Spiro is... 
 

On 11/24/2016 at 9:51 AM, cookiemonster555 said:

It seems like you feel upset and hopeless, but trust me, there is hope. There will be a cure, but in the meanwhile, do not lose sight of who you are (like your very interesting hobby! You seem like a talented young woman). I've attached my post below about how to rationally deal with an "acne crisis." Although I know "finding a cure" for acne is important, this thread is about the emotional and psychological effects of acne, and these are two different things. Finding a curse is only fixing half the problem- the other, more important half, is regaining your confidence, and this is possible, even when you're not completely clear! Think about it this way: worrying about acne is not productive. Meaning, you do not gain anything positive from it. Yo only lose precious time and self-confidence. Based on our thoughts, we can actually change the way we see the world. For example, if you say to yourself, "I am boring and sad and lonely" everyday, you will be gloomy, and fewer people will want to talk to you- it's a self-fulfilling prophecy, do you see what I mean? But if you say, "Despite my acne, I am beautiful! I won't let a genetic predisposition rule my life, the only life I have been given." You will be positive, make friends, and trust me NOBODY in the universe cares more about your acne than YOU do. People will love spendng time around someone who is positive and confident, so chin up you are worth more than your appearance.

http://www.acne.org/messageboard/topic/364481-a-rational-approach-to-acne/

Thank you for this : ' ). Everything you say is true, but it's still very hard... I try to focus on other things but often times I go into hours-long breakdowns over my acne just feeling horrible and looking up things online. My friends are very kind and have never mentioned my acne once, but I still feel so self conscious about it. I know (most) of my acne isn't my fault, but I feel like strangers who see me will think it is. Like when w people with none to mild acne tell you you just need to wash your face (like they're assuming you don't...)
 

On 11/25/2016 at 3:07 AM, Naturalcure1 said:

Hey there! Please take a look at my blog post. I feel it will really help you. Much love! 
http://www.acne.org/messageboard/blogs/entry/32202-how-to-heal/

Thank you! I may try out some of those.

So I would definitely say run a hormone panel before choosing Spiro. It works GREAT for some people. It seemed to be working well for me at first, but then I developed neck acne and a mild back breakout unlike anything I'd ever had before. I also started getting strange little whiteheads all over the size of a pore, and a comedonal rash on my cheeks and chin [which has since lessened since I stopped the drug]. I don't think it was an IB, it was my body reacting poorly to the drug. Eyebrow and eyelash hairs also fell out as well. It's mostly stopped...I was losing like 5-6 a day, now I have only lost 1 in the last 4 days since stopping.

Overall my experience does seem to be ATYPICAL so please do not fear the drug, just get tested first and watch your body. It didn't interact well with me because my baseline hormones didn't agree with it...yet I can't be on a low estrogen pill either because it causes acne [Lo Loestrin Fe was a nightmare, so was Syronx]. I'm thinking of just going the BCP route again, the monophasic one Ortho Cyclen/Sprintec since my doctor recommended it for my mood/depression issues. Monophasics don't make your hormones change every single week, which can be a godsend for people like me who get bad acne during ovulation and a few days before my period. It's hard to tell how each person could react to birth control but this post is a good guideline to follow: http://www.acne.org/messageboard/topic/330166-good-bad-birth-control-pills-and-implants-for-acne/

Avalati, glad to see you're getting some helpful ideas and support!