Rick, are you kidding me? THAT is what has made you too upset to leave the house?

I read your entire thread and then clicked on your pics, expecting your face to resemble one giant crater.....

What a saw was a handsome man who obviously has more of a mental block than any kind of physical one.

If I were you, I would seriously consider venturing back out into the world.

I think you're ready.

You're right Oneluvlychik. I want to live an everyday life in public, but my thoughts always pull me back to the house, and I always make excuses for myself. I need to snap out of it, and I will. I think another problem I have is self-loathing. I have become a professional at it. It's just every time I hear someone mention my face, I completely break down, but that was in the past. Like you mentioned, I think I am ready to give life another chance. Thank you.

Hey Rick, I was also surprised seeing your photos. I would give anything to have skin like yours, as I'm sure most people would. I highly highly doubt anyone ever even notices something wrong with your face. To me it looks fantastic!

I definately think that maybe having acne in the past has led to a developmentof BDD, because there's honeslty no reason to hate your face. I think , perhaps, you're trying to search for perfection which just won't happen.

Acne can have a real long lasting effect on our mentality and our opinions of ourselves, trust me, I HATE myself so much, but just try to push pastit.

To chime in, I also saw your photos and was surprised...thought your skin looks nice...honestly like an "after" picture of what I'd expect to see on a dermatologists' website but not to downplay your feelings. I felt similarly about a scar and a few people here were surprised because they had multiple scars and felt I shouldn't be upset because it's one and not many. But the scar was in a prominent place, and even surgeons could understand why I wanted to improve it. So yeah...i understand being fixated on something. But I truly don't see a reason for you or anybody else to be repulsed or disgusted by your skin. I think that is truly unfair.

In terms of what you wrote about wanting to have a particular skill or talent.. that totally made sense and I understand! I think, like everyone else you are looking for what makes you unique.. almost searching for a reason to feel of value as a person. But you have value and worth just for being alive. We don't have to all have something that's exclusive to us...almost any skill or talent we have.. someone will have less or more of that talent. So I agree, comparing ourselves in that regard is dangerous because it kind of doesn't prove anything. In terms of a career or life interests, continue maybe to pursue your hobbies...i don't remember if you're trying to find the right career; but maybe working temp jobs can help in that regard...it helped me identify some interests I never even knew I had! Keep asking questions Rick, and answers will slowly come..

Rick, I wasn't able to read the entire thread but I want to tell you that I think your skin looks REALLY good. I don't think you should be hesitant to going out because those feelings will go away. Coming from someone who gets severe anxiety and body issues, my recommendation is when you are talking to someone imagine that you are either the best person you can be or someone you really think is awesome. It won't last kinda like fake it til you make it but it for sure helps! don't be ashamed your skin LOOKS AMAZING

Rick, I wasn't able to read the entire thread but I want to tell you that I think your skin looks REALLY good. I don't think you should be hesitant to going out because those feelings will go away. Coming from someone who gets severe anxiety and body issues, my recommendation is when you are talking to someone imagine that you are either the best person you can be or someone you really think is awesome. It won't last kinda like fake it til you make it but it for sure helps! don't be ashamed your skin LOOKS AMAZING

I really wish I could have all this mental support everyone has given in this thread while out in public interacting with people. I've tried giving my self-esteem sparks when needed, but I read into minute details when it comes to facial expressions and mannerisms, so my spark quickly fades. I'm really trying to control my thoughts, and I would like to think because of my past experiences, I'm better mentally than I was in my past, even though it doesn't translate on this thread, but I'm slowly progressing. Thank you. Thanks to everyone for your support and advice.

Maybe don't try to control your thoughts. But try to step outside them. If you look into mindfulness techniques, they teach you to observe your thoughts without judging them. Don't fight them.. just notice that you aren't your thoughts. They are just that...thoughts, not reality.

I understand, it's very hard. It seems like you are a very strong person but you don't see it. You are probably one of those people that do not see how wonderful they truly are. And I second snowflake, I practice Buddhism and I really have found a sense of relief and happiness from the techniques it teaches. Look into it maybe, not as a religion, but just something to keep in mind and incorporate into your life!

 

Rick, I wasn't able to read the entire thread but I want to tell you that I think your skin looks REALLY good. I don't think you should be hesitant to going out because those feelings will go away. Coming from someone who gets severe anxiety and body issues, my recommendation is when you are talking to someone imagine that you are either the best person you can be or someone you really think is awesome. It won't last kinda like fake it til you make it but it for sure helps! don't be ashamed your skin LOOKS AMAZING

I really wish I could have all this mental support everyone has given in this thread while out in public interacting with people. I've tried giving my self-esteem sparks when needed, but I read into minute details when it comes to facial expressions and mannerisms, so my spark quickly fades. I'm really trying to control my thoughts, and I would like to think because of my past experiences, I'm better mentally than I was in my past, even though it doesn't translate on this thread, but I'm slowly progressing. Thank you. Thanks to everyone for your support and advice.

Please don't feel this way. Trust me, you are not alone in your suffering. I understand you like you have no idea. Please go out and make friends. You sound kind and caring. I'm positive that you will find a great number of friends who will love you and who will enjoy your company. I wish you the best of luck, God bless

To be totally honest, as much as you say its not BDD (but later relented that it could be some level of BDD), I think this is CLASSIC BDD. I see some VERY minor scarring, but your view of it is totally disproportional. I'm not being judgemental, but this is clearly something psychiatric, not physical.

That said, I understand your feelings. Sometimes I feel like I've made progress in my scar revision journey, but then out in the real world, I constantly, and I mean constantly get double takes and stares that linger just a little too long. Then there are people who are just rude enough to mutter something under their breath, but within earshot of me. It sucks, and I'm just so tired of the disrespect. It's either people not wanting to meet my eyes, or they outright just give me dirty looks.

I honestly think that your skin looks great.

Go enjoy your life. I'm sure a lot of us here can tell you

how much we regret some of the times we missed out on great life experiences,

due to acne and/or acne scarring. I'm currently trying to take my own advice,

so you're not alone, believe me. Cheers.

To be totally honest, as much as you say its not BDD (but later relented that it could be some level of BDD), I think this is CLASSIC BDD. I see some VERY minor scarring, but your view of it is totally disproportional. I'm not being judgemental, but this is clearly something psychiatric, not physical.

 

That said, I understand your feelings. Sometimes I feel like I've made progress in my scar revision journey, but then out in the real world, I constantly, and I mean constantly get double takes and stares that linger just a little too long. Then there are people who are just rude enough to mutter something under their breath, but within earshot of me. It sucks, and I'm just so tired of the disrespect. It's either people not wanting to meet my eyes, or they outright just give me dirty looks.

Thanks for your sincerity, and even though I hate to admit it, you're right. There's definitely something wrong with my mental state, and I excuse my mental health with simply labeling myself a coward. It relieves me from all responsibility of any mental disorders that I have (in my mind anyway, I guess a sort of coping mechanism). I like what you mentioned about being out in the real world. How do you overcome these stares and mutterings? I can never seem to let go of hearing words or seeing them avoiding eye contact. They stay in my mind and turn into mountains, and it never fails. How do you stay strong?

I'm at the point where I just want to say "f it!" My skin isn't changing anytime soon, and I'll always have these physical characteristics, so why am I allowing the same thoughts to weigh me down? But it's strange because when I try to turn to this "who gives a f" mentality, it seems my entire personality changes. It's like you have to be thick skinned, and this thick skin brings a persona of its own, but it's needed to simply function in this world, yet we have to stay as sane as possible; it's insane!

I'm not posting these thoughts right now to receive anyone's sympathy or empathy. I'm writing these thoughts at the moment to let people know that their words do mean a lot to another individual's state of mind.

My dad has been admitted into the hospital because his health is deteriorating, and the doctors have given my family the worst possible scenario as a foreseeable outcome. Right now, my thoughts are completely numb, but while being in the hospital and having to interact with the medical staff, visiting relatives, and seeing other people in general, my thoughts get persuaded in the wrong direction because of my skin, and it takes my focus away from my father, but with this thread and people's encouragement, I have been able to remove my insecure thoughts and focus on the only thing that should matter in my mind right now.

I just want to thank everyone on this website for giving me the confidence I need in this dreadful moment in my life. Thank you so much.

I'm not posting these thoughts right now to receive anyone's sympathy or empathy. I'm writing these thoughts at the moment to let people know that their words do mean a lot to another individual's state of mind.

My dad has been admitted into the hospital because his health is deteriorating, and the doctors have given my family the worst possible scenario as a foreseeable outcome. Right now, my thoughts are completely numb, but while being in the hospital and having to interact with the medical staff, visiting relatives, and seeing other people in general, my thoughts get persuaded in the wrong direction because of my skin, and it takes my focus away from my father, but with this thread and people's encouragement, I have been able to remove my insecure thoughts and focus on the only thing that should matter in my mind right now.

I just want to thank everyone on this website for giving me the confidence I need in this dreadful moment in my life. Thank you so much.

Praying for you and your family Rick.

Hugs from NYC

Don't feel bad Rick32 , I do understand ,I have been in situations too where I have missed so many things and ocassions in my life , and that is a big part of my life that I regret , so be with your dad ,with your soul and mind .

My prayers are with you too.

Take care.

Hey Rick,

I took a look at your pictures (please excuse me if I was overstepping any bounds) and, from man to man, you're a very handsome man, man. Seriously .

Hey Rick,

 

I took a look at your pictures (please excuse me if I was overstepping any bounds) and, from man to man, you're a very handsome man, man. Seriously .

 

 

I don't know what to think anymore. I don't want to take your words with a grain of salt, but it seems that I have no choice but to do so, thank you though. I needed some sort of confidence right now and your words gave me just that. I'm just so confused. I'm at the point where I just want function around people without thinking so negative about myself or others. I hate judgment that is put on all of us, and I hate that we are our worst critics.

I'm sorry for the rant, but thanks for taking the time to browse this thread and offering your feedback. You're a good person.

Ok, I just saw where you posted your pictures, and honestly, I was surprised and had to comment. I understand how scarring can make one feel about themselves, but you are actually very attractive. After reading how you describe yourself that was not what I was expecting at all. I even said "dayumn!" to myself when I saw your pics because here I was expecting a not so good looking guy, and saw the opposite. I just really can't see how your looks could disgust anyone. Yes you have some scars, but you're a great looking guy anyway. I truly mean it.

Anywho, that's my opinion! I'm pretty sure I suffer from BDD, though, so I really get where you are coming from. Any kind of scarring or imperfections on my skin drives me crazy and makes me hate myself. It is a feeling that seems almost impossible to overcome.

This topic touched me. Rick, you are a very attractive man, and I can tell you are such a kind person. Your skin looks so good. Most of your scars are sooooo shallow! No exaggeration, you wouldn't need much treatment and a little bit would get you to amazing skin. I see one medium scar that would respond well to subcision. Definitely pop into the scar forum often. I lived there for a long time when I first started seeing scarring. There's so many options, so much hope. I've read months worth of topics and you always see people start with so much sadness and hopelessness and then watch them progress. You're not alone. A lot of us have been where you're at and know exactly what you're feeling.

Have you ever considered counseling and medicine to help get back into public life? That's literally one of the hardest things to do once you've self protected so long by seclusion. It's really hard to get your head straight by yourself when you sink low. I suffer from bad scarring and severe texture issues, had acne for 15 years, and have been at the point where not even my own mother could look at me. I'm in treatment for my mental health because you have to do more than treat the skin, the most important thing is to regain your self worth. It can be a little nerve racking to tell someone at first, but damn is it amazing to have support during recovery. Any BDD traits, agoraphobia, or even just social anxiety is not something that can be treated on your own. Just consider it for the future. It could really change your life.

We really are our own worse critics. I said a little dayyuum in my head too when I saw you haha. Some people might notice scarring, most don't. That's the truth. Ultimately, anything you're not happy with about your skin right now is 100% treatable, and most importantly you can get your self esteem back to a good place too. I know what it's like to be tired of this and the treatment, 15 years with acne and now a year in on scar treatment, I've been exhausted at times. You got to keep chugging along, those results start to show through and you get your head back to a good place, it's all worth it. I really hope for the best for you because it's possible.