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Hi,
I'm posting this here because I'm feeling emotional angst on the subject. I really want to get my rolling scars fixed. However, I would have to go into my retirement money to do it. I am out of work and my w would be majorly pissed off! I don't blame her. But I want to finally get some procedure that would help the scars. What would you do if you were in my shows? Just go ahead and do it? Do it at home? Get a secret loan? My life is a mess, and has been for years. If I could make the scars better my life would be better. I do not want to go on like this. It's a drag.
To be honest, if I were in your position, I likely would not have pursued a relationship in the first place. However, now that you've made that decision, it's no longer simply about what you want or feel you need -- you need to base decisions on "what's best for us?"
Hence, I think you should definitely not "just go ahead and do it." In my opinion, it would be much more responsible to talk to your significant other about how you're feeling. Then, with consideration for her feelings on the matter, seriously think about whether or not using retirement funds is a wise move.
Getting your scars fixed will NOT make you happier in the long run. Happiness has to come from within. Once your scars are fixed, you'll probably find something else to fixate on. It's just human nature. Also, when it comes to finances, you have to make decisions as a team player as your finances will affect you both.