long time lurker, but first time commenter. just wanted to share my input here because this topic is pretty relevant to my life right now lol

im 19 too and have always been self concious about relationships, especially when it comes to any thing sexually. i have bad acne on my chest and back (as well as face) but im always afraid that a girl will be disgusted and not want to touch me or anything im still a virgin and now the only one out of my friends

i have to admit im more than a little jealous of my friend but his current situation gives me some hope. we both have struggles with acne and never been confident with girls, especially when hanging with our friends with clear skin who seemed to have much better luck with girls (probably due to confidence too)

but now he has a girlfriend, and seriously lucked out. shes really attractive and by any guys standards, pretty face, great body, ect. and she doesnt care that he has acne or scarring or anything even when she had perfect skin. i never thought a girl like her would go for a guy like me or him but its good to know theres people out there who arent shallow about appearence. (even though it seems rare ) hes 19 and was a virgin too but lost it with her. however most of his bacne cleared up and its just scarring so im still not confident about mine. im happy for my buddy but so jealous. its hard with little things like just seeing her kiss him on the cheek not caring about the acne or scars and wish i could have even that regardless of sex.

so i know how you feel almost being 20 and still being a virgin. it sucks so bad especially when it seems everyone isnt. but i have hope that once im more confident i can find the right person.

I think that my frustration stems from the fact that I am so different from other people. It is the difference that does not sit well with me coupled with that 95% of the people have (had) a relationship at my age. It reminds me that I am a mutant, a freak.

In the past it was never a real problem, but now that I am older it becomes more and more apparent how different I am. I have also a past with bullying and I have been learning now what kind of effects that (still!!) has on my mental health. I am able to get help though.

But I have to say things are getting a bit more normal now. For the first time in my life I have been in the house of someone that I saw on a regular basis yesterday, so maybe things are improving for me.

I think that my frustration stems from the fact that I am so different from other people. It is the difference that does not sit well with me coupled with that 95% of the people have (had) a relationship at my age. It reminds me that I am a mutant, a freak.

In the past it was never a real problem, but now that I am older it becomes more and more apparent how different I am. I have also a past with bullying and I have been learning now what kind of effects that (still!!) has on my mental health. I am able to get help though.

But I have to say things are getting a bit more normal now. For the first time in my life I have been in the house of someone that I saw on a regular basis yesterday, so maybe things are improving for me.

Well, I hope you'll get the help you'd like to get.

Good luck with everything!

Its nice to see a lot of virgins on here.... if that doesn't sound creepy. Being 16 and in high school a lot of people I know have had sex and of course I still respect them and hold them dear as friends, but its still a shock since I haven't even kissed a guy. Some guys I know would think I was prude for wanting to keep my virginity. Originally I wanted to wait till marriage- and that would be great- however if I was in a loving relationship for more than year or 2 and we been through a lot of ups and downs, then I would reconsider.

I simply want a mature and happy relationship, which doesn't really go along with some shallow gf/bf relationships right now. Its either not right or just plain awkward. And usually its just plain awkward.

I have a lot of respect for a guy who is still a virgin. Better to be the innocent guy then to be the who scores all the time And you're still young so don't fret. Fret at 50. Panic then.

Its not a big deal at all. When I lost it I finally saw how petty the whole 'virgin' stigma is. I was thinking it'd never happen, why won't it happen, etc. And when it did, It didn't change a damn thing apart from make me realise how it wasn't such a massive deal as I made it out to be. It will happen when it happens, and like others have said, f*ck what other people think about it - its none of their business anyway.

I'm a virgin for a good reason.. I haven't found the right girl . I'm 26 and I feel like I will be a virgin for a long time. I am one of those nice person.. I try to do the right thing. I'm hoping to meet a virgin as well... hah.

Its not a big deal at all. When I lost it I finally saw how petty the whole 'virgin' stigma is. I was thinking it'd never happen, why won't it happen, etc. And when it did, It didn't change a damn thing apart from make me realise how it wasn't such a massive deal as I made it out to be. It will happen when it happens, and like others have said, f*ck what other people think about it - its none of their business anyway.

I'm a virgin for a good reason.. I haven't found the right girl . I'm 26 and I feel like I will be a virgin for a long time. I am one of those nice person.. I try to do the right thing. I'm hoping to meet a virgin as well... hah.

Thats exactly the right way to go about it, losing it to someone you actually care for is a lot better than losing it for the sake of it!

I agree!! I feel like I will be a virgin for A WHILE. Girls are complicated. I've met a few just to make friends, but they all stopped messaging me except for one. We do still chat sometimes. We have a lot of things in common. I just need friends. I am not good at meeting people, that's why I started meeting some. I might attend some event on meetup.com. If this girl who I am chatting with loses interest.. then I am done with meeting girls!! I will focus entirely on education. I need to improve my communication skills and be a little funny..

Another big problem is that I do not get any signs whatsoever that it is "okay to get out there", if you know what I mean. During highschool I was rejected every day, but now I don't get anything. People are totally silent about my looks. I rather have some feedback then no feedback at all, even if the feedback is negative. I hate flying blind when it comes to this.

Now is the obvious solution to go after girls and try some stuff out. I could try that, but the girls I know are taken or not interested in a relationship (I don't get any kind of signs from the latter group). It is very difficult for me to enhance my social life without throwing massive amounts of money at the problem. I don't have friends and I have to pay to be around people. If it continues like this, then I will never be able to have children of my own.

Don't you just hate the way that sounds? To "lose" your "virginity"... It almost sounds like a tragedy. haha

Another big problem is that I do not get any signs whatsoever that it is "okay to get out there", if you know what I mean. During highschool I was rejected every day, but now I don't get anything. People are totally silent about my looks. I rather have some feedback then no feedback at all, even if the feedback is negative. I hate flying blind when it comes to this.

Now is the obvious solution to go after girls and try some stuff out. I could try that, but the girls I know are taken or not interested in a relationship (I don't get any kind of signs from the latter group). It is very difficult for me to enhance my social life without throwing massive amounts of money at the problem. I don't have friends and I have to pay to be around people.

If it continues like this, then I will never be able to have children of my own.

Don't you just hate the way that sounds? To "lose" your "virginity"... It almost sounds like a tragedy. haha

Another big problem is that I do not get any signs whatsoever that it is "okay to get out there", if you know what I mean. During highschool I was rejected every day, but now I don't get anything. People are totally silent about my looks. I rather have some feedback then no feedback at all, even if the feedback is negative. I hate flying blind when it comes to this.

Now is the obvious solution to go after girls and try some stuff out. I could try that, but the girls I know are taken or not interested in a relationship (I don't get any kind of signs from the latter group). It is very difficult for me to enhance my social life without throwing massive amounts of money at the problem. I don't have friends and I have to pay to be around people.

If it continues like this, then I will never be able to have children of my own.

Just put an add somewhere that says "Guy who wants to have children is looking for a mate". See what happens. lol

Anyway, you are obviously desperate like I said before and seeing the fact people have a sixth sense they can tell and therefore you will be ignored. What you need to do is reevauate your values when it comes to relationships else you will continue to be alone or end up in a loveless relationship.

I've tried that on datingsites. I filled in "Want children: yes"... and nothing happens. Not even sending messages works for me. It is not the relationship perse, but knowing that I can get a relationship that is the real issue with me.

meh it's all blown way out of proportion

A problem, really

well ur doing better than me, im 20 years old virgin and never had a gf

I am 20 years old, and I will be 21 in May.

I am still a virgin, never kissed a guy, and never really had a boyfriend.

I would not get upset about this virginity thing.

I myself would much rather date a guy who is a virgin.

I know that most guys will tell other guys that it's not good to be a virgin, but I personally find it an attractive trait/quality.

I am 20 years old, and I will be 21 in May.

I am still a virgin, never kissed a guy, and never really had a boyfriend.

I would not get upset about this virginity thing.

I myself would much rather date a guy who is a virgin.

I know that most guys will tell other guys that it's not good to be a virgin, but I personally find it an attractive trait/quality.

Welp, I'm a virgin! let's date?! I'm up for it for sure! Hah.. I would love to date a virgin girl... I don't know how rare that is.

I'm 19 years old. I'll be 20 in about 6 months...and I'm a virgin (a MALE virgin). I'm so self conscious about this and just feel so abnormal and weird because of it. It doesn't help that my "friends" constantly give me shit about being one. It makes me feel even worse.

BUT I have made it to third base before (twice with the same girl on two different occasions). I would go into detail but I'd rather not. If you don't know what third base is look it up. So I've had some kind of sexual relations before. Just not full on sex.

All the people I know have long already lost their virginity. Most people (well most MALES) lose their virginity in their teenage years (13-19). Very few lose it before 13 and very few lose it after 19. Like I said this is all applying to males. Being a female virgin is not embarrassing at all. For a guy it is.

I'm 6 months away from being in the after 19 category and I'm seriously starting to wonder if I'm ever going to lose my virginity. I'm a average looking guy. Honestly. Without acne I'd say I was a above average looking guy, but that will never happen again. But that's another story.

I'm just wondering if anyone else is also a virgin in these forums or have had a similar experience as I'm having. I just feel so alone in this matter. I'm worried about how a girl (when I find one...) is going to react when I tell her I'm still a virgin at my age. I'm probably going to get laughed at. It's so uncommon at my age to still be a virgin.

Anyways let me wrap this up (no pun intended). Just had to get this off my chest. Any responses would be appreciated. Thanks.

These studies that say people lost their virginity by this or that age are probably distorted because teenagers are pathological liars about these things. Let's say for the sake of argument that they are true, do you really want to be like the rest of society? Have you seen society today? It is not something you want to emulate for the most part. Ignorance, misplaced and distracted values, etc. I'm no prude, but go to any frat party or spend an hour watching the E! Entertainment channel and you will get a good glimpse of what I am talking about.

Be honest and be yourself. Have patience and DO NOT RUSH SEX because you will regret it. Use the fact that you are virgin to your advantage. Let me explain...

You see, any decent woman worth having a relationship will see this as a plus. They would rather take a 20 year old honest guy who isn't afraid of his sexual inexperience over a knucklehead who thinks having a lot of sex with multiple partners makes him a man. Another thing, women don't like the idea of knowing you had sex with someone other girl in the past. It's kind of a touchy subject people tend to avoid in relationships (both men and women) because a lot of jealousy and other emotions are present. When you get yourself a girlfriend she will never have to deal with this issue and will hold onto you like grim death. And please, don't just do it with any available woman to get it over with. Look for a relationship with a great woman, and once you have that....the sex stuff will just fall into place.

I'm a virgin too. Hell, I haven't even had my first kiss lol.

To be honest, I am scared of being a 'forever alone' for my whole entire life and I'm hoping I could get over these insecurites (not just acne) of mine.

I am 24 and I've never had a boyfriend in my life, never kissed a guy and of course I'm still a virgin.

I want to go on accutane to finally clear my acne, but my derm does not want to give it to me

It annoys me that she has so much power over my life. If I cannot take it, I will always have acne (my mom is 60 and still has oily skin, so has my 83 year old grandmother) and I will never be able to have a boyfriend and be alone for the rest of my life and arrrrgh!!!!

So you're definitely not the only one. We're all in this together...

I want to go on accutane to finally clear my acne, but my derm does not want to give it to me

I hope there is a good reason for that.

Although my acne is not as horrible anymore as it was during my teenage years, I still have a ridiculously high oil and sebum production. At the end of the day my skin is so oily that part of my hair sticks on my skin, as if I had put glue on it. My glasses slip down my nose because of all the oil.

And this is with a healthy diet and lifestyle. If I eat just a tiny bit of junk food (like noodles for lunch or one bar of chocolate) it gets even worse and I break out immediately. My chest and back are like that, too. I always have to wear tops that go right up to the neck to cover everything up.

Because of my mother and my grandmother I know that my skin will not get better by itself anymore. And I don't want to run around with this skin for the rest of my life.

I researched accutane for a year and I have found many people on this website who have similar skin like mine, went on accutane and had a positive experience. Because of them I know that it is ok to take accutane even if you don't have severe cystic acne. And I want to start at a very low dose, like 10mg and see what happens. If it's too strong I can still stop taking it.

But my derm maintains that accutane is only for people with cystic acne. I'm planning to show her the blogs I found on this site and try to convince her like that.

From the reactions of the people on the bus, it seems as though it's just another day LMAO!.

m 20 and a virgin.. my close friend who is vry cute asked me if i wana do it wid her just as friends.. i said no! not cause i dont want to.. its cause i cant cause of my bacne.. its difficult when you have a chance and cant do it rather than not doing it cause u really dont want to do it..

but all i can do is hang in..

lately i seemed to be thinking i am never gonna hav sex with the one i love.. n f i ever wanna have sex i will have to pay for it.. i know that this is very wrong.. but face it i cant ever show my back to the girl i like..

I am going to tell everyone, who ask why I'm not in a relationship, that I've never have been in a relationship because of my skinproblems.

We should start a dating club/section here for people who share similar problems. I posted a topic also in this section on how hard it is to find someone who you would like to date(feel comfortable with), when you have acne and/or scars. There is a reason why there are dating sites for people who have all kinds of problems with their health, so that they could support each other and improve their lives. If I had a girlfriend with clear or "good" skin, I would find it hard to explain why I need all these creams or why I should burn my skin by fraxel lasers.

I feel that even if we ever get rid of acne completely, we will still be scarred from it emotionally.

Why so desperate to lose your virginity?

When ever you see a young woman or a young man push a pram, do they ever look happy?