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Paul,try to change your derm ( mine doesn't want me on accutane either) and ask for Accutane again. I know, there are derms that still prescribe it. Maybe it's your miracle drug?
And watch your diet, maybe you don't eat healthy enough. Check out holistic/nutrition section, try to cut out some foods, which may trigger your acne.
About your 'depression therapy'! I guess you chose a wrong type of therapy, since there are plenty types of them. You should try Psychoanalysis(type of therapy where the patient examines past events, feelings and memories to understand how they shape her/his life today. Psychoanalysis is a long-term approach to therapy, usually lasting a few years) or Cognitive-Behavioral therapy (focuses on changing unproductive or upsetting thoughts and feelings. The therapist helps the patient examine his/her thoughts and feelings in order to identify unrealistic and intrusive thoughts). Do some research yourself and find more types of theraphies, that are right for you.
Other than that, just try to relax and stay positive. There is a way out! 
i am witnessing some tiny little things i like to call "Potential zits" (usually get em on my nose and cheeks) They are not even a bump really yet at all,are very faint and i only see them ifi search for them veryclsoely. If i catch them early and tea tree oil em they dissapear in two days at the msot...so thats all goodacutally
Thanks, Amy.
The therapy Im doing is Cognitive Behavioural. I did some one-to-one sessions in September and Ive got another six weekly group sessions to go.
I only referred to it as therapy for depression because that was what I went to see my doctor about initially and CBT was what they suggested. Sorry for the confusion.
The topic for next weeks group session is the thing which triggers our depression the most. Although there a collection of things which contribute, the root trigger of all those things is my acne so I guess Im going to have to share my feelings about my skin and my struggle with acne. Not even sure Ill get through it without breaking down to be honest, but its got to be done.
I reckon Ill have to tailor my approach for the rest of these group sessions so that I get the most out of it. Im going to have to apply the theories I learn directly to my acne because thats what it all comes down to. The feelings I have about it just seem to be getting worse and worse and I dont know where this huge amount of self loathing has come from. Whats stopping me is that all my thoughts and feelings about myself are just so negative and angry, I cant seem to get past it. Its gotten worse since I was fired from my job, perhaps because I dont have any kind of purpose now. Ive no friends to turn to either so its me, feeling worthless and of no value, to anyone or to myself.
I keep making my acne worse and no doubt thats just prolonging everything. I pick everything and I always pop pimples. Its like an addiction or something. I feel like I have to do it and I just cant leave my face alone. Its definitely a reflection on how I feel; Im angry at my skin so I punish it. Of course, that punishes me too. Yet another cycle I have to try and break.
The doctors I spoke to all said the same about Accutane and told me that I wont get it because my acne is not cystic and severe. In order to see a derm, I would have to get the referral from a doctor and the ones at the office where I go said no because I dont fir the criteria. The detrimental impact this has on my quality of life doesnt come into it. I told them everything and pretty much burst into tears but it didnt matter because its just not a factor the doctors who are available to me. Thats why I feel totally lost because I feel like nobody wants to help me. They told me I should just accept it but I cant. I dont like who I am and theres no way I can learn to for as long as I dont have a clue what my skins going to be like from one day to the next. I am trying to help myself but I cant do it all by myself. Thats why I went to seek medical help and advice but Ive hit a dead end there.
Really feels like Im running out of options because Ive done all the medications that are available to me. I so wish I could see a derm, if only to get some proper help, but I have to go through the doctors first. Feels like Im being cheated out of a possible solution and denied the resulting happiness I've seen people here gain. I always support people who do Accutane and I always follow the logs here and offer encouragement because I think its a very brave thing to do. I wanted to be brave, too...
The only other thing which has come to my attention is that a Chinese doctor has opened up a place nearby and he deals in Chinese medicine, herbal remedies and health foods, things like that. I reckon Ill go and see him next week. Theres a nutritionist there as well so I could talk to them. Theres not a lot I can do with my diet right now because I dont buy my own food and cant afford by buy my own specific things these days as Ive no money, so I get what Im given. Maybe I could tweak things a little, depending on what advice they could give me.</div>
Anyway, Ill be quiet now. Having a bad time of it and I just needed to get this out. Nobody else to talk to and I know people here have been through stuff and can relate. All the same, I apologise for rambling and essentially hijacking the thread today, folks.
Well, Im trying to look at the posotives as well as negatives......
My forehead is almost completely cleared up....and my nose too......but my cheeks 
Well on left cheek where I already had minor things going on. Well, the one minor pimples still there...bleh, but i Didnt mnid that. What i mind is the slight under the ksin bump there. I mean, if I act carefully it can be gone in three days, without it rearing its ugly head....but I almost out of Tea Tree Oil D:
And than, what REALLY makes me pissed is on my right cheek, who last night was COMPLETELY clear with no clogged pores or potential zits and out of nowhere I have this huge red thing in the crease of my mouth (not a cyst, I see a tiny head on it...and ok, its not THAT huge, buts a baig one in comparison to my other zits..... and its RED) And am so peeved becuase that'll take a week to go away. What the fuck? So I have 3 red btiches on my cheeksright onw, and god knows howm any other potentials ready to rear there heads.....Ill try to be glas my foreheads cleared.....Im still so pissed about the underskin lump and especially the thing on my crease.....I got the SAME thing last week....in the same place, but onmy right cheek. But that one had no head and was larger, and it came out of nowhere too. So frusturating! Im just gonna ambush the underskin one with Tea Tree Oil to deter it and Clay mask Dry the shit out of the crease on.....please.go.away by Monday....or shrink atleast. Thats what I get for drinking ONE glass of soda...i never drink soda, but it was a birthday party......
Since...June....idk acne doesnt make me depressed. Honestly, when Im breaking with some new spots, I get pissed off and a little frustrated for about half a day at the most. Than I accept them, and do what I can to make them go away.....but im not a severe case.
The doctors I spoke to all said the same about Accutane and told me that I wont get it because my acne is not cystic and severe. In order to see a derm, I would have to get the referral from a doctor and the ones at the office where I go said no because I dont fir the criteria. The detrimental impact this has on my quality of life doesnt come into it. I told them everything and pretty much burst into tears but it didnt matter because its just not a factor the doctors who are available to me. Thats why I feel totally lost because I feel like nobody wants to help me.
Hi Paul,
I think this is a very strange thing. Have you tried switching doctors, go to another office? I'm pretty close to going for Accutane myself. If my doctor wouldn't refer me to a dermatologist I would insist on it; if without success I would switch doctors and make sure to bring it up before choosing a new one. it's incredible that they say "just live with it". Of course I can't judge the severity of your acne but if it spoils your life the least they can do is refer you to a derm. If you've exhausted every treatment and your acne is still persistent I think you deserve to look further.
On 11/13/2011 at 1:41 AM, legato said:Hi Paul,
I think this is a very strange thing. Have you tried switching doctors, go to another office? I'm pretty close to going for Accutane myself. If my doctor wouldn't refer me to a dermatologist I would insist on it; if without success I would switch doctors and make sure to bring it up before choosing a new one. it's incredible that they say "just live with it". Of course I can't judge the severity of your acne but if it spoils your life the least they can do is refer you to a derm. If you've exhausted every treatment and your acne is still persistent I think you deserve to look further.
Thanks for that.
When I last saw my doctor, I'd been off of antibiotics for almost three months. Prior to that, I'd been on Lymecycline for nine months straight. My acne just came worse and the breakout lasted for about six weeks. I hardly ever left the house and couldn't bring myself to see the doctor. When that breakout started to clear, I went to see him. I guess I didn't do myself any favours because he could only go by what he could see, but I just couldn't bring myself to let him examine my skin when it was bad.
I asked about Accutane and said I'd done all the research and that I thought it would be justified because of all the other medications I'd taken and because of the impact acne has on my life, regardless of its severity. He said that he nor any of the other doctors in the office would refer me to the derm. He said that referring me would be "pointless" because the derms wouldn't want to see me as I don't fit the criterea, which is apparently that the acne has to be severe and cycstic. Now, I know this isn't a UK-wide thing so I can only assume that it's the policy of derms in Sheffield where I live.
I can't go to a different office as they are allocated based on whichever area of the city you live in, so I go to this one as it's in my area. The only way I'd get to see other doctors is if I were to move to another area of town or indeed another city altogether.
It really does confuse me because I know that there are cases here which are very mild and not prolonged at all, yet they have been given Accutane simply because they asked for it. Now, I know it's not a competition or anything so that's not where I'm coming from. Far from it; I'm happy for anyone who gets to try it and see whether it could be what fixes their problem. But I just don't understand why I wouldn't be able to at least see the derm for advice and other options, on the basis that I've had persistant acne for 13 years. Well, I do understand, in the sense that I understand what the doctor said about set criteria, but it just doesn't seem fair.
I don't know what my next move will be. Maybe I'll play ball and do the course of Doxy like he said. Then if it kicks off and gets bad after the course finishes, I'll just have to be brave and go and see him again when it's all broken out. Part of me almost wants that to happen, to at least then see if it makes a difference to the doctors approach.
Still, I have found a degree of peace with that particular aspect of my situation. After all, I am actually taking something and I do ususally try and improve my skin. Been low these last few weeks and I've picked a lot, no doubt that's the bulk of my problem at this moment. So if I can get a handle on that, maybe I'll turn a corner and a bit of kindness towards my skin and an opportunity for it to heal could be what's needed to break the cycle, then maybe that will give the Doxy a better chance at keeping things at bay.
I guess I'm feeling a bit better about stuff, just need to get back to psoitve way. Been a rough couple of days but writing it out and letting it go has helped me so, to those who have read, thank you for listening and not telling me to shut up. 
How am I feeling about my acne today? ANNOYED.
I only have 1 pimple on my face right now but it's red, and extremely painful. It developed about three days ago. At first it was just a super tiny small pimple that I didn't really notice, but when I did notice it (after my shower it had a whitehead on it) I attempted to pop it. It popped a little bit but became extremely swollen and hurtful. I decided to put tea tree oil on it and leave it on overnight because that usually helps my pimples heal faster or at least come to a head the next day. I woke up this morning and my skin peeled where the pimple was. Now I have this burn like mark that stings whenever I touch it or apply makeup. I am so angry because other then that I have absolutely no other pimples in sight. I am desperately hoping at least the redness will die down before Monday so I can go to school feeling totally self conscious. I wish I could just relax because it's only 1 pimple. 
Other then that, I feel pretty good!
I guess I didn't do myself any favours because he could only go by what he could see, but I just couldn't bring myself to let him examine my skin when it was bad.
Yeah, this seems to be the conflicting thing here. I totally know where you're coming from though. Next time if your skin is in real bad shape, see a doctor immediately! Just realize it's for the good cause. I think backed up with your depression problems (that are being treated) you should definitely get to see a specialist.
Any GP I've had is totally clueless about acne. It's offensive really.
I was striving to stop obsessing about my flare up and just live life, avoid any evil mirrors and stop picking and overtreating. It went pretty well until this morning at the dentist's while making a 360 picture of my mouth I had to stare right into a mirror and I couldn't avoid noticing how unchanged and horrible my 2 cysts still are. It has been a week and literally no change. It put me right back to feeling depressed about it.
I really don't know how to feel I'm a bit indifferent I suppose in relation where I'm at with my acne. It seems as though my face will look just about clear and then WHAM a cyst will crop up. A really painful one at that. I'm also left with horrible hyper-pigmentation. So I'm about 60% clear just not entirely happy with the tone or texture of my skin.
Acne wise, actualyl decent. I only have one actual zit and thats a normal sized one that I dont care mcuh for.
But skin wise, SUPER PISSED. I dont know what the hells wrong with me, but all of the sudden my whiel face si covered in these tiny, MICROSCOPIC little colorless dots, it sort of feels like slight goosebumps when I touch it. Theyre not visible unless you look at my face carefully in the sun. But they sort of um...itch. Theyre colorless and reallly small, but they cover my ENTIRE forhead and chin and a bit aronud my jawlnie and cheeks. Everyone says the cant see what I mtaolking aobut at all, but I ensure somethings there. Like a million tiny little baby whiteheads? Theyre on ym chest too and let me tell you they itch. Not as much on my face. But my back and chest and neck ITCH. Theyre not eczema, or hives ro chicken pox. Tiny colorless dots. I havent eaten anythingo ut fo the oridnary or used anything odd on my face or have anything touch my face. I got this same thing last year around before christmas. Except they were a little more severe. Can someone please give any thoguht to what this might be? Last time it lasted around 5 days. What should I do? Or can I just wiat it out? Know what this is? Thanks:)
I feel ugly and today It's depressing being almost 22, hanging out with a large group of people, looking around and seeing that I am the only one with pimples all over my face. I feel like crying and almost wish I would have stayed on birth control. Acne affects my life, days like today I would rather get a bad side effect 10 years from now than have to deal with the daily life of having acne. Today I have avoided my husband because I don't want him to see my ugly skin. I wish there was another option for hormonal acne besides BCP. I was on it for 3 years and decided to go off of it in July due to possible long term side effects. Ive had acne all my teenage years but being on the birth control mostly cleared it for me. Since July it has been progressively getting worse. I have at least 5 cysts on my face and countless pustules on my chin and lower cheeks. I just want to hide!!!
On 11/15/2011 at 9:30 AM, SarahWiedeman said:I feel ugly and today It's depressing being almost 22, hanging out with a large group of people, looking around and seeing that I am the only one with pimples all over my face. I feel like crying and almost wish I would have stayed on birth control. Acne affects my life, days like today I would rather get a bad side effect 10 years from now than have to deal with the daily life of having acne. Today I have avoided my husband because I don't want him to see my ugly skin I wish there was another option for hormonal acne besides BCP. I was on it for 3 years and decided to go off of it in July due to possible long term side effects. Ive had acne all my teenage years but being on the birth control mostly cleared it for me. Since July it has been progressively getting worse. I have at least 5 cysts on my face and countless pustules on my chin and lower cheeks. I just want to hide!!!
Sorry to hear you're feeling that way, Sarah. I hope things can improve for you soon. Many of us have been there; those moments when you just can't see a way out. They do pass because there are always solutions and options. Don't give up hope. It saddens me to hear that you feel like hiding away. I know how that feels. You shouldn't hide from your husband though! No doubt he loves you for who you are and it won't matter what you skin is like. Sure he'll want to help you through tough times and be there with you, and it's not like hiding away helps you either because you'd only feel even lower for it. Really hope you're feeling better in yourself very soon. Stay strong! 
I stopped using protein powder and protein bars. I cut out all sodas and now my complexion looks healthier. But I am sick of drinking water all of the time.
Yaa same i only drinkk water too, cut out all junk food. But i likee how my skin looks right noww (kinda)
Have either of you tried that powder flavor they make for water nowdays? I'm not suggesting it because I haven't tried it/don't know the ingredients, just wondering.
On 11/20/2011 at 12:16 AM, Callum. said:Worried. My acne's gone but I finished Accutane 2 days ago and am terrified it'll come back.
Maybe it will, maybe it won't. For now, enjoy the fact that you don't have it. Congratulations on clearing up!
Should it come back at a later date, you could deal with it then, but it might not even happen. No sense in worrying about something which might not happen.
So don't stress or worry, just go and enjoy your clear skin. Well done, Callum!
Might as well add a little something while I'm here...
Feeling so much better this week, today especially. I have one tiny pimple, that's all. Otherwise, my skin's looking great.
Hard to believe that less than two weeks ago, it was a complete mess from all my picking and I was as low as I've been in ages. It's like so super-intense bipolar thing where my moods go to one extreme or the other from day to day depending on my skin. Getting really tired of that so it's time for it to stop.
I've quite picking my skin and popping pimples. Well, haven't quite managaed it, although I've popped just one pimple in the last six days. For someone who would pick or pop everything in sight maybe twice a day, that's massive. I've just gone cold turkey with it. Totally ignored everything and they've gone away as fast as they appeared.
I took a food intolerance test yesterday, looking forward to getting the results and seeing what shows up. Then I can tailor my diet for good and make it more skin-friendly.
I had a group therapy session for depression on Wednesday and the subject was barriers and the things we put in the way of doing what we want to do. I was straight in there and told them my skin history. Actually brought one of the therapists to tears, she thought it was so sad how I've held myself back for as many years as I have and felt like a prisoner in my own skin. Never talked to anyone in person in such detail before, never mind a group, so that was massive for me. Really glad I did it though. They know about the no-picking thing so when I go back next week, they'll be able to tell how I've done, one way or the other. Letting other people know kind of makes it official in a way, like I can focus on proving to them that I can do this.
Feel like everything is heading in the right direction. Finally getting my head straight and getting to a good place. This is allowingme to focus on my skin in a positive way and take control. If I carry on and can keep going as well as I have for the last week, I want to see if I can be clear by the start of 2012.
