Notifications
Clear all

Insecure

MemberMember
0
(@invisible02)

Posted : 09/11/2017 1:21 am

I wish I knew how to start or knew exactly what to say. I have never felt more alone in my entire life. I've been dealing with acne for almost 7 years now and I'm 21. I used several face washes, proactiv and went to the dermatologist and doctors several times. I decided to go for a more natural method for a while and completely changed my diet. I have cut out dairy, chocolates, meat, any type of fruit that had a lot of sugar in it such as bananas or watermelons and other foods as well. I tried a gluten free diet and continued to push myself. I've never felt good enough. I take pictures of myself everyday and stare at the person in those pictures and tell myself that I am ugly. I feel ugly and I feel like nobody could ever love me because of how I look. My older brother has made several jokes and told me that he has never seen anyone with worse acne. He told me that I should wash my face properly or that I haven't done enough. He has mocked me and made jokes about my skin that only made me feel uglier. My mom picks on my skin every single day. She analyzes it when I wake up in the morning and she always has a sad expression on her face which makes me feel like I'll never be good enough for her. She's never told me that I'm beautiful even once and I always feel like a disappointment to her. Both her and my brother have made jokes about my skin and mocked me. My aunts told me I used to be pretty and everyone around me has picked on my skin or has been insensitive and nobody understands why I get upset or why I cry when people make comments. I think it hurts so much because I look in the mirror everyday and don't love myself but I'm trying to and every time someone says something about my skin, I feel like I sink back into the same place even though I'm trying so hard to make a change. I cry every time because I wish people would try to see how hard I'm trying and see that acne is not my fault. I feel like people blame me for my skin or think I'm not making an effort but I miss out on so much because of my skin. I don't go a day without makeup and I lost a lot of my self confidence. I just wish I could feel good about myself and feel beautiful. I know I should be more grateful but when so many people make you feel like some sort of beast you begin to believe it. If anyone is reading this and has ever felt this way I just want to tell you that you are beautiful, good enough, handsome or truly a good person no matter what people say. I hope that you feel beautiful or handsome because you truly deserve to feel good and confident.

Quote
MemberMember
22
(@a-c-p)

Posted : 09/11/2017 6:14 am

Hey there! I'm so sorry you're going through this... you don't deserve what's happening to you, nobody does, It's just cruel and rude to act like your family is doing, I'm sorry but It seems as if they just don't care about what you feel, It seems like they like to put you through pain and that is not what a family should be doing at all. Talk to them, tell your family that you think what they're doing is cruel and that you don't feel loved or happy, tell them that you already feel disappointed with your skin and that you don't need anyone to remind you of how bad It looks, tell them the naked truth about your feelings, don't hide anything and be agressive with your words.. If after talking to them they don't change their behaviour then leave!! Seriously, get the hell away from there as fast as you can. If You have a boyfriend/girlfriend or bestfriend ask them if You can stay at their place for a while... This is your best option, honestly... Your relationship with your family is toxic and It may lead you to be so depressed that you will not want to leave your house or talk to people.
Stay safe and good luck.

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@summertimesadness)

Posted : 09/12/2017 4:56 pm

I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

This hit me hard because I do the same things as you, although I don't have the same family situation, I do take pictures of myself most days I don't know why I do it as it makes me feel terrible, I just stare a pick out all things that make me ugly!

I know how you feel but I promise you, you are beautiful!! Spots are temporary and I think a positive thing about having acne is I can see past them, everyone on this forum knows how you feel and you have all of our support!!

As for you mum and brother, I suggest you sit down with your mum and explain how she makes you feel and what that does to you maybe then she will see what she does isn't okay and tell your brother to stop as well

Hope this helped ^_^

-Summertimesadness

Juwalker liked
Quote
MemberMember
164
(@juwalker)

Posted : 09/12/2017 5:49 pm

Invisible02 , I am so angry and sorry that you are suffering from the complete ignorance that unfortunately exists about acne! So many people seem to think it is caused by lack of cleanliness or bad diet which is far from the truth! If only they could be bothered to research it they would realise that acne sufferers work incredibly hard in every way to do the very best for their skin and put in hours of skincare and trying lots of different regimens , diets etc in desperate attempts to have normal skin! I think you need to show your family your posting and the replies you have received and ask them for their support. They owe it to you to understand much more about acne and support you fully in finding the best treatment. God bless. Agree with Summertime Sadness : You will always have someone who understands on this website. We are rooting for you. Be strong and proud.

Quote
MemberMember
1
(@sadamy)

Posted : 09/13/2017 1:56 am

Hey, I feel your pain but don't think this is the end. Acne although doesn't dissapear over night but it is not completely incurable. I hate all those people who said that to you and want you to know you're not alone. Have you considered accutane?

Juwalker liked
Quote
MemberMember
44
(@skyesthelimit)

Posted : 09/29/2017 2:14 am

I am so sorry to know that you had to go through that. But... I love how you ended your post as you still managed to say them although you are experiencing your own struggles. So I just want you to know that YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL too and don't let anyone define who you should be.

Start from that positive motivation and be with people who would truly accept you for who you are.

They are rare but they exist hun. Hope you find them soon! *hugs*

Juwalker liked
Quote