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I feel like a total loser. I've had acne since the age of 14 and now I'm 22 and haven't accomplished anything with my life. I still live in my parents basement and I feel like I'm going to be stuck here forever. Acne has ruined my confidence throughout the years and I feel so ugly and slow that it's just turned me into a lazy bastard.. I went to college for a year, dropped out. got 5 tickets and now my license is suspended. I can't focus on any daily tasks to save my life. I have no real friends and it's so hard for me to talk to people.. girls don't like me and I've only been in a few short relationships that left me heartbroken and lonely. Nobody really ever calls me up to do anything. What should've been the best years of my life has turned into years of depression and misery. I look at all my old high school people and old friends from my old town and they're all doing something with their lives and moving on with things while I'm still 22 and act like a little kid. I just feel so depressed. my skin is always irritated and I always get discouraged because of my acne scars. I've contemplated suicide so many times and been to a clinic for behavioral health. I just can't feel happy anymore... Everyone says I worry so much about little things and I do, I can't help it... what's wrong with me... I feel like dying everyday.

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Haha, how do you think I feel? I spend 90% of my day on the computer, other 10% sleeping or eating :lol: I have anxiety issues so I'm scared to talk on the phone, hang out with friends, etc.

Sometimes you can't help being depressed, but only you can live your life. Make little changes and get out there. It will be hard at first [i know this] but it gets easier along the way. Get out and have fun, you'll regret it when you're older and on your death bed reminiscing.

[P.S - I know it's easier said than done. But do it anyways.]

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I've only been in a few short relationships that left me heartbroken and lonely. Nobody really ever calls me up to do anything.

I agree with Lyssa. Only you can live your life. You say that you were left heartbroken after your relationships ended. Why did they end, and how did your partners feel about it? Nobody calls you? Well perhaps you should initiate the communication.

You need to do something about it. You can't expect things to ever change if you keep living your life in exactly the same way each day. Go back to school. Get a job if you haven't already. Move out of your parents place. Get back in touch with your mates, even if at first it's only through e-mail etc. What are you doing about your acne? Have you seen a derm?

Don't give up! Life is full of opportunities and endless possibilities. You just have to be brave enough to go after them. I'm 23, and sometimes life sucks! But try and focus what you do have, not what you don't. Set yourselves some goals, figure out what you DO want, and work out how you can get it. Speak to your parents. Talk to them, let them know what you're feeling. And smile! It'll make you feel happy. Good luck.

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Ok young man, your story is quite bad. But forgive me as I cannot help myself thinking that it's not acne but you who has self-ruined your life. Yes, I agree that acne is a killer to acne-sufferers' self-confidence but hell yeah, so what? You let it eat up your confidence and throw yourself into depression? Nahhh, it's not the way a real man's gonna live his life.

I believe there are a lot of people here who have even more severe acne problems but they have managed their life much much much better. Stand up, young man and start doing something good for yourself now.

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ya....tst3r. i feel like a loser too. i'm 21. about to turn 22 in less than a month. i can't believe how fast time has gone by. it seems like yesterday i was in high school. anyways i get the cystic acne. the king of acnes. and i go to college with all the clear skin people. i would like to drop out too, but my mother's been paying a lot for my education. so i can't really quit :(. can i add you on msn or something so we can disscuss about our progress. you seem like a person i could get along with. i've been using this site to search for answers on the cure and there are some good advice. now i'm wondering if running excercise would help detoxify my body so i wouldn't get acne and just waiting for ppl's response. i plan to eat a cup of fruit smoothies everyday now too. oh, and if you havne't gone on accutane, maybe you should give that a try. i am on my 3rd year of accutane. 4 months of it each year that is.

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The best thing you can tell yourself is it's never too late to jumpstart your life. I'm 23 and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 22. I haven't even tried to go to college because I let my acne, depression, and anxiety ruin my life for the longest time. The point is I finally said I'm tired of living like this so I moved out and about 6 months later I'm in a relationship with a beautiful girl. I'm also planning on joining the military after my course of Accutane is up which will probably be followed by going to school so it's never too late even if you're 30.

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I've only been in a few short relationships that left me heartbroken and lonely. Nobody really ever calls me up to do anything.

I agree with Lyssa. Only you can live your life. You say that you were left heartbroken after your relationships ended. Why did they end, and how did your partners feel about it? Nobody calls you? Well perhaps you should initiate the communication.

Well, my last relationship I never told her about my acne and sheltered teen years because It was too embarassing. She was a very beautiful & intelligent girl still in high school who I thought to be way out of my league. I even drove 6 hours to go see her and spend time with her. although I knew she wasn't the right girl for me and it wouldn't work out, I still couldn't help having feelings for her because she was the funniest girl and always made me laugh even though she was a big time trouble maker and got me into lots of trouble. more like a "bad habit" but she was the first girl to ever show me a good time and actually care about me in the beggining, but she lived an incredibly troubled life in a bad part of a city. I grew up in the suburbs of a boring town, it just didn't click... I guess it was the whole experience of going to a new place and experiencing a different kind of lifestyle that someone you thought u were in love with lived. I only started really experiencing life at the age of 21 when I started going out and being in my first actual relationship. I never made the best choices in finding girls for relationships because I just don't know how to talk to girls or what to say. I could never hold a long relationship due to self-esteem and insecurity issues. I can never make new friends because people be hanging around the same people and I don't know how to make new friends, I end up doing or saying something stupid. Plus I'm usually a quiet guy and people pick up on my insecurities and find out i'm a loner and don't wanna be friends no more. When I do make a friend I open up too fast and they think it's wierd. I'm a very sensitive person and very sensitive to critisism so I tend to get angry at all the wrong reasons. I never really had a dad growing up either. During my teenage years I was verbally abused by my step dad, he would say things like "ur going no where in life ur just gonna be a bum on the streets" and physically abused as a child. and growing up with a cultural division being vietnamese and american. so yea.. had 2 deal with stupid crap at home too. so I got other issues burried under the rug as well.

Ok young man, your story is quite bad. But forgive me as I cannot help myself thinking that it's not acne but you who has self-ruined your life. Yes, I agree that acne is a killer to acne-sufferers' self-confidence but hell yeah, so what? You let it eat up your confidence and throw yourself into depression? Nahhh, it's not the way a real man's gonna live his life.

I believe there are a lot of people here who have even more severe acne problems but they have managed their life much much much better. Stand up, young man and start doing something good for yourself now.

Well I believe that there are people out there who have it worse then me, but I just can't help but feel depressed all the time and insecure. I've turned into such a negative person that many people hate being around me. I don't know what it is.. I've had thoughts of suicide before and went to a psycologists and even a behavior health clinic to get help, but I'm so stubborn that I don't want 2 get help or help myself. I just don't know how to get help or to do anything. I just usually spend my days in the basement worried about getting older doing nothing Constantly and losing years being sleep deprived. I envy what others have soooo much and it just makes me feel left in the dark. I don't know why I am the way I am. I've become some what bipolor or something.. I act nice to certain people and other people I'm just a selfish person... Even my immidiate family is getting tired of my attitude about life and everything. I'm just a selfish lazy child stuck in a 22 year old's body who's never gonna grow up. I complain about everything and I'm stuck in the past, got nobody to really talk to about my feelings because I don't really have any friends.. I'm just a quitter and a loser!!

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ya....tst3r. i feel like a loser too. i'm 21. about to turn 22 in less than a month. i can't believe how fast time has gone by. it seems like yesterday i was in high school. anyways i get the cystic acne. the king of acnes. and i go to college with all the clear skin people. i would like to drop out too, but my mother's been paying a lot for my education. so i can't really quit :(. can i add you on msn or something so we can disscuss about our progress. you seem like a person i could get along with. i've been using this site to search for answers on the cure and there are some good advice. now i'm wondering if running excercise would help detoxify my body so i wouldn't get acne and just waiting for ppl's response. i plan to eat a cup of fruit smoothies everyday now too. oh, and if you havne't gone on accutane, maybe you should give that a try. i am on my 3rd year of accutane. 4 months of it each year that is.

yea... it feels like yesterday i was in high school too and i haven't done anything or gone anywhere.. life goes by so fast and when ur stuck doing the same thing for years and years i dont know... u just feel helpless.

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You're not hopeless. At least you are aware of the very fact that it's you who refuse to make positive changes for yourself. Another young man who replied to you above seemed to be happy to finally find you as someone who may understand why you guys act so desperately in a curable situation. I hope that you guys will not finally end up by committing to this "quitter and loser" attitude.

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Don't feel like a loser. You are only 22 years old.

I'll say this. You decide where you end up. So far your decision has been to stay home. Don't keep making that excuse about acne because as you get older it will sound ridiculous. You haven't gone anywhere because you let it hold you back, and you can face that reality today or in the future.

I know what you're feeling and we have all experienced it. This place is going to be here to help you up if you fall, but we can't help if you stay grounded without making any progress. You have to make the first move.

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The best thing you can tell yourself is it's never too late to jumpstart your life. I'm 23 and I didn't move out of my parent's house until I was 22. I haven't even tried to go to college because I let my acne, depression, and anxiety ruin my life for the longest time. The point is I finally said I'm tired of living like this so I moved out and about 6 months later I'm in a relationship with a beautiful girl. I'm also planning on joining the military after my course of Accutane is up which will probably be followed by going to school so it's never too late even if you're 30.

how did u move out without college??? I wish I could do that but I can't find a high enough paying job

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.. wow that sucks... im only 15 years old but it kind of sounds like you are whining.. im not being mean or trying to be offending but your a 22 year old man! ok if you think you've got it bad, then im living in hell compared to you! im diabetic, obese, moderate acne, self conscious, cant stand up for myself, and have no shot with the ladies...i have had so many people make fun of my face calling me pepperoni boy, asteroid belt, Rudolf and the other noses on his face, and much more... ive had gurls make fun of me saying " lemme pop ur nasty zits"

but here i am.. still happy that i have fun with life, and i don't really care about what they say! i have so much fun wihth friends, i have a couple of good friends, we go out to the theater, hang out, eat at restaurants, all the social stuff and im lovin my life and i am only 15 :D

if gurls break up with u... its because u let ur self consciousness get a hold of you... its hard to look for ms perfect.. believe me i think ive met about every pretty gurl in the school and had her say " ur a cool friend" and then get boyfriends and tell me how to help them.

my advice is dont wait for friends to come to you, you go get them. become active, go to a gym and make a couple of workout friends and then later become good friends... go to a bar and dont be afraid to aska girl to dance, ifshe says no just say ok and walk away to ask someone else remember to "Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, start all over again.", or even go to a library and read a couple of ooks and if u see someone pick up the same book as u say hi but dont be weird and say " be my frend o.o" talk to them about the book and if they are not busy offer them a cup of coffee (this might work ona gurl, not so sure on a guy). if u have o... call up ur old friends and ask them if they wanna go clubbin and tell them to bring some of their friends and inroduce urself to them..

i might not be old like u ppls but i know u are to young to be whining about not having friends :) and ill be ur friend :) i enjoy meetin people :D

and id love to point out that ur 22 and u have loads of time to make new friends.. hope this helps :D

-Michael

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.. wow that sucks... im only 15 years old but it kind of sounds like you are whining.. im not being mean or trying to be offending but your a 22 year old man! ok if you think you've got it bad, then im living in hell compared to you! im diabetic, obese, moderate acne, self conscious, cant stand up for myself, and have no shot with the ladies...i have had so many people make fun of my face calling me pepperoni boy, asteroid belt, Rudolf and the other noses on his face, and much more... ive had gurls make fun of me saying " lemme pop ur nasty zits"

but here i am.. still happy that i have fun with life, and i don't really care about what they say! i have so much fun wihth friends, i have a couple of good friends, we go out to the theater, hang out, eat at restaurants, all the social stuff and im lovin my life and i am only 15 :D

if gurls break up with u... its because u let ur self consciousness get a hold of you... its hard to look for ms perfect.. believe me i think ive met about every pretty gurl in the school and had her say " ur a cool friend" and then get boyfriends and tell me how to help them.

my advice is dont wait for friends to come to you, you go get them. become active, go to a gym and make a couple of workout friends and then later become good friends... go to a bar and dont be afraid to aska girl to dance, ifshe says no just say ok and walk away to ask someone else remember to "Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, start all over again.", or even go to a library and read a couple of ooks and if u see someone pick up the same book as u say hi but dont be weird and say " be my frend o.o" talk to them about the book and if they are not busy offer them a cup of coffee (this might work ona gurl, not so sure on a guy). if u have o... call up ur old friends and ask them if they wanna go clubbin and tell them to bring some of their friends and inroduce urself to them..

i might not be old like u ppls but i know u are to young to be whining about not having friends :) and ill be ur friend :) i enjoy meetin people :D

and id love to point out that ur 22 and u have loads of time to make new friends.. hope this helps :D

-Michael

Hahah nice! :catdance:

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Haha, how do you think I feel? I spend 90% of my day on the computer, other 10% sleeping or eating :lol: I have anxiety issues so I'm scared to talk on the phone, hang out with friends, etc.

Sometimes you can't help being depressed, but only you can live your life. Make little changes and get out there. It will be hard at first but it gets easier along the way. Get out and have fun, you'll regret it when you're older and on your death bed reminiscing.

[P.S - I know it's easier said than done. But do it anyways.]

Proud to say this has changed. :D

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It's fine to feel down every once and a while, but the more you mature, and grow in age, confidence will lead you a long way, and if you are down and don't take yourself serious, no one will. As for not accomplishing anything, thats fine because you are still young, keep on rockin in the free world!

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Think of it as a battle....acne can't win. Screw you acne. When it comes down to it, you can either live your life to the fullest with acne, or stay miserable and depressed with acne. I mean which would you rather choose?

I know it's WAY easier said than done...I know how much it sucks and I totally feel for you. but just know that acne can't control you unless you let it. And 22 is still young. Don't worry! Most peoples lives are just starting in their early 20s.

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My brother is almost 21 and on his computer most of the time but we're very close and I think it helps keep us both grounded.

You don't have to let acne control you, like pastelpaas said. I've been depressed before and have done things to myself that I regret and very little of it was because of acne.

We had a blizzard in ny yesterday so today I went to the beach by myself and had a great time. I loved the seagulls planted on the 9in snow, sky, waves, sun set, everything. Yes I came home with my face pink, cold, and oily but I FELT alive. And that mattered more to me.

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hey Tst3r. This is Jon S. I have had acne since I was 13. It got progessively worse year by year in high school. I had it over my cheeks and my forehead in high school. Right now I am 24 and I still get new zits and I have some scars from it, too. I was not frequently picked on for my acne. It was very rare for me to even get picked on. The best thing you can do is not let your acne get you down. For me, the facial agitation that feel from the acne annoys me more than the arrogant opinions that people can have about my face.

I understand about the frustration about girls. Personally, I have never had a girlfriend. Girls care more about how you act towards them and what your true colors really are. I have always been socially awkward and I used to be in denial about that until about maybe two months ago. It is difficult for me to form freindships, but don't blame acne for that. As guys, our real downfall is self-centeredness, jealously, and negativity. I know first hand because I am pessimistic. I am sure that one day you can have a great relationship with a girlfiend that you will meet someday. I once felt like that I was close to having a girlfriend once. I did not listen to what was being said by her, so I thought she was interested. At the same time, it is really easy to get lead on. My close friends are in solid relationships and the key to their success is not telling each too much too soon and not doing anything that drastic in the relationship. I say earn each other's trust but do so slowly. My social life is not that great either. Blaming problems on acne solves nothing. My current social problems would probably be with even if I did not have acne. I just recently let go of some my stubborness to listen to great advice when I get it. It is helping me some. I struggle with looking people in the eye and used to go off track in face to face conversations, and my body is constantly stiff and bowed up. I try to be tough and the funny guy too much.

I have been true to myself, more so than I have been ever. I don't know you personally and I do not know your circumstances, but social awkwardness and my own poor decisions gave me all of my negative issues. Your case may be completely different. I am just trying to tell there is hope.

The only time my acne gets to me socially is when I look for work. While I am 24 years old with a Bachelor's Degree in History, I still worry about being taken seriously. Right now I am not licensed to teach in the state of Georgia because I have to pay five thousand dollars to take a licensing course and I don't have the money. I wonder if the potential employers will look at my face and not want to hire me because of acne. I now I am off topic right now. I am temporarily laid off from waiting tables in this difficult economy. I know there is still hope for me. I know that there is hope for you. Just be patient and believe in yourself. God will find a way for you. Just be patient and when you have faith it will take time, but things happen. I have seen the miracle of my mother recovering from stage 3 cancer, so miracles can happen. Yet I know this off topic. I am saying hoping that you will turn to God if you have not already done so.

I also had suicide issues. I had a two and half year period of my life where I wanted to kill myself almost everyday. I had plently of people that were nice to me and I still wanted to kill myself in high school. I got over it because I found there is always something to look forward to. I started wondering what would happen next. I don't know if you still have suicidal feelings but this is how I got out. While I am trying to help, again I don't know your situation, so I don't know what your best option is if you still have those feelings. The fact that I used to be suicidal stays in my mind. It makes me really doubt my self worth. I wonder that if wanted to kill myself at some point in my life, then what makes we worthy of being here? Then I remember that I promised to myself that I will never will get in that kind of rut again and I move on with my day. My reason for feeling suicidal in the past was over all the guilt that I felt for being a real jerk to people at times. I still can be a jerk, but realizing it and trying to fix the problem only can help how life, but nothing changes overnight.

In conclusion, please understand that you are not a loser. If people are so quick to judge you, then you don't really need them in the first place. I kind of feel like a loser too sometimes, but the real enemies of the average person is just social awkwardness and self-centered decisions. Blaming everything on acne does not make sense. I blame myself for not so great situation that I am in. My insensitivity, immaturity, dishonesty, and every other negative quality that I let take over my life at times is the real why I can get miserable. Acne mainly something of discomfort physically. It only takes over your life if you focus on it too much. I turned my life over to Christ a little more than a month ago and through Christ you can fight your problems and win. The real problem is in each and every person that has ever been alive. It is a universal issue. Sin.

I hope that you found this useful and I apologize for being so long winded. Trust life does get better but it can be a slow process that requires faith that it can get better.

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