I am down to my final 2 weeks on accutane. Before I get into my experience about that I'll give you some background about myself. I started getting cystic acne all over my forehead when I was about 13 and I'm almost 20 now. I'm sure most of you know the emotional toll that acne takes on you. All throughout high school I could never be the outgoing kid that I am. I hid away and isolated myself from most people except for a few friends who have no idea how much acne effects me daily. My mood was completely dictated on how my skin looked every single day in high school. I tried to explain how much acne was affecting my life to my mom and she tried to sympathize, but having never had bad acne herself, she couldn't really understand. She thought that it was just completely an appearance thing like not liking your nose or wanting a boob job. I'm sure you guys can understand that these things are not even remotely similar. I went to the dermatologist often, but because he was part of a small firm that didn't have an ipledge program, he never even discussed accutane with me. He didn't want to send me anywhere else and lose my business. I had no idea accutane was even an option until I started treatment.

Anyway, after high school I started my first year of college hoping that I could start over, be the outgoing kid that I am and somehow my acne would magically disappear. Obviously that didn't happen. So I then noticed this extremely cute girl in one of my classes. I never talked to her before, but I have seen her around a lot and seen her with other people and she seemed absolutely amazing. The whole first semester I tried to work up the courage to talk to her after class, but I had to wait for a day where I thought my acne was acceptable. This day never came so on the last day of classes I just went for it and talked to her. I had absolutely 0 confidence because of my acne and completely screwed up my first impression. I completely missed my chance and know she looks like she is in a very happy relationship with this other dude. It was at this point I decided I was fed up with acne. It held me back from talking to the girl of my dreams and was completely ruining my life. I was tired of getting drunk every weekend and just hooking up with random drunk girls I didn't know. I've never had a girlfriend in my life and I really want to find a girl that I really like and have the courage to talk to her.

I then went to the dermatologist at my college and got prescribe accutane. I am almost done with 6 months and let me tell you that this medication is hell. I haven't had much of the severe side effects but I constantly have headaches, I used to have joint pain, I am very forgetful, my lips are cut, my skin is dry and whenever I do break out it looks so much worse on accutane because my skin is so sensitive. I am also a compulsive picker so I constantly had people asking me what happened to my face after picking a cyst and forming a gash in my face. I also had to explain to my friends why I wouldn't go out with them anymore and would just sit alone in my room by myself on weekends. My grades slipped because of my forgetfulness and my life in college was terrible. Anyway, I am home now almost done with treatment, and I couldn't be happier with my decision. The trip on accutane was brutal, but I know that it's worth it. I didn't experience any terrible side effects that are permanent, but I know many do and I may have gotten lucky. My advice to others is accutane is an option only if you cannot take the emotional toll that acne has on your life. If your acne is bad, but you can deal with it better than me, than accutane may not be for you. The decision to take accutane should not only be based on how bad your skin, but more so on how much your skin affects you. Anyway, the end is in sight for me and I can't wait to start living!