Day 70

I just spent two weeks waiting, waiting, waiting... for these two stupid nodules by the right-hand corner of my mouth to go away, and now that they finally have, I'm (for the moment) completely clear. As in... completely.

So basically I have gone from this... (...cringe...)

To this...

And finally, to this, which is me in my PJ's and no makeup so please excuse the fact that I look hideous in all of these photos.

In seventy days. No Photoshop, even! Well, except to lighten the picture up since my room is so dark and yellow.

My only side effects are dry skin and lips. I haven't had any joint or muscle pain, depression, digestive problems... today I kind of just touched my face and was shocked at the fact that it's smooth. I just hope to all that is holy that it stays this way.

Anyway... my updates are obviously infrequent now because I haven't needed to update, but if I break out all of a sudden or grow another head, I'll post here.

Holy crap, you look amazing!!! I am so jealous that this drug has worked for you so well, so quickly, and without all the icky side effects. It is really awesome that you didn't even end up with any scarring.

Holy crap, you look amazing!!! I am so jealous that this drug has worked for you so well, so quickly, and without all the icky side effects. It is really awesome that you didn't even end up with any scarring.

 

Thank you! I do have a fair bit of shallow scarring that doesn't get picked up in the crap light of my bedroom, but it's fairly superficial (at the right angles it looks deeper, but only because I'm a fusspot about it). My chin is pretty scarred (you can sort of vaguely make it out in the photo) and I can feel it when I run my fingers over it, but honestly, I don't really care.

I'm on a really low dosage so that might explain the lack of side effects - my derm decided that a longer course at a shorter dose was better for me than a shorter one with a higher dose.

Holy crap, you look amazing!!! I am so jealous that this drug has worked for you so well, so quickly, and without all the icky side effects. It is really awesome that you didn't even end up with any scarring.

 

Thank you! I do have a fair bit of shallow scarring that doesn't get picked up in the crap light of my bedroom, but it's fairly superficial (at the right angles it looks deeper, but only because I'm a fusspot about it). My chin is pretty scarred (you can sort of vaguely make it out in the photo) and I can feel it when I run my fingers over it, but honestly, I don't really care.

I'm on a really low dosage so that might explain the lack of side effects - my derm decided that a longer course at a shorter dose was better for me than a shorter one with a higher dose.

 

Do you mind me asking if you found your scarring (not just red/dark marks but actual scarring) actually improving while you were on Accutane? Or were yours scars just all really shallow to begin with?

I can understand being a bit of a fusspot about scarring. Mine is relatively shallow as well, but it's all I can see when I look in the mirror.

I tried to push for a higher dosage when I first started out on this drug, but now I'm definitely liking the sound of a lower, long-term dosage a lot better. When I went on my higher dosage last month it had severe side effects for me, so I'm hoping that a lower dosage will do the trick. Your results came really quickly anyway though!

Holy crap, you look amazing!!! I am so jealous that this drug has worked for you so well, so quickly, and without all the icky side effects. It is really awesome that you didn't even end up with any scarring.

 

Thank you! I do have a fair bit of shallow scarring that doesn't get picked up in the crap light of my bedroom, but it's fairly superficial (at the right angles it looks deeper, but only because I'm a fusspot about it). My chin is pretty scarred (you can sort of vaguely make it out in the photo) and I can feel it when I run my fingers over it, but honestly, I don't really care.

I'm on a really low dosage so that might explain the lack of side effects - my derm decided that a longer course at a shorter dose was better for me than a shorter one with a higher dose.

 

Do you mind me asking if you found your scarring (not just red/dark marks but actual scarring) actually improving while you were on Accutane? Or were yours scars just all really shallow to begin with?

I can understand being a bit of a fusspot about scarring. Mine is relatively shallow as well, but it's all I can see when I look in the mirror.

I tried to push for a higher dosage when I first started out on this drug, but now I'm definitely liking the sound of a lower, long-term dosage a lot better. When I went on my higher dosage last month it had severe side effects for me, so I'm hoping that a lower dosage will do the trick. Your results came really quickly anyway though!

 

I don't mind at all. I haven't seen any improvement of my actual scars, they actually seem to appear worse because my skin is drier and thinner, but I think that once I'm done with my course and my skin becomes a little "plumper" again, they'll be less evident. The actual healing, I'm not sure about. My red marks seem to heal just as slowly as they did before. I have one under my eye that has literally taken five months to go away from a huge, huge nodule. You can see it in my first photo... the rest of them left regular scars but that sucker was so deep.

I think we just need to become accustomed to not looking for things when we look in the mirror. I'm guilty of being too picky. I much prefer my shallow scarring to how my acne was. It was pretty horrific. For me, anyway.

Definitely a good idea to go for a lower dosage over a longer period, I think. I run every day so having joint and muscular pain would be really frustrating. As long as your cumulative dose ends up the same, it's all good. I didn't expect my skin to react so positively in such a short time, it's possibly the best decision I've made in a very long time.

I think we just need to become accustomed to not looking for things when we look in the mirror. I'm guilty of being too picky. I much prefer my shallow scarring to how my acne was. It was pretty horrific. For me, anyway.

Definitely a good idea to go for a lower dosage over a longer period, I think. I run every day so having joint and muscular pain would be really frustrating. As long as your cumulative dose ends up the same, it's all good. I didn't expect my skin to react so positively in such a short time, it's possibly the best decision I've made in a very long time.

 

Bleh, yeah, that does make sense. Scarring > active cystic acne all over your face, that's for sure. I'm just struggling especially because I was used to nearly flawless skin for so long. I think I have to learn to accept that I'm never going to look like my old self again.

Good on you for running every day! I've never been very good at keeping a fitness schedule, so I envy people who can do physical activity regularly.

Congrats once again on such fantastic improvement. You must be feeling pretty damn amazing right now

I think we just need to become accustomed to not looking for things when we look in the mirror. I'm guilty of being too picky. I much prefer my shallow scarring to how my acne was. It was pretty horrific. For me, anyway.

Definitely a good idea to go for a lower dosage over a longer period, I think. I run every day so having joint and muscular pain would be really frustrating. As long as your cumulative dose ends up the same, it's all good. I didn't expect my skin to react so positively in such a short time, it's possibly the best decision I've made in a very long time.

 

Bleh, yeah, that does make sense. Scarring > active cystic acne all over your face, that's for sure. I'm just struggling especially because I was used to nearly flawless skin for so long. I think I have to learn to accept that I'm never going to look like my old self again.

Good on you for running every day! I've never been very good at keeping a fitness schedule, so I envy people who can do physical activity regularly.

Congrats once again on such fantastic improvement. You must be feeling pretty damn amazing right now

 

I couldn't remember a time when I had decent skin before Accutane, so I couldn't look back with melancholy.

Ah it's almost autonomous nowadays, once you get into a good routine, it's much easier. It starts off a bit difficult, I walked for a year before I even tried running, I mostly started running because it doesn't take as long.

Thank you again!

Aw, I used to love walking. I lived downtown for four years without a car, so I used to walk everywhere but that never felt like exercise to me. On the other hand, I have fairly big boobs (for an Asian girl, at least), so running is always a big hassle for me!

Aw, I used to love walking. I lived downtown for four years without a car, so I used to walk everywhere but that never felt like exercise to me. On the other hand, I have fairly big boobs (for an Asian girl, at least), so running is always a big hassle for me!

 

Well there's your problem. I'm pretty much flat-chested, so I don't have that issue! I sometimes feel crap about not having bigger boobs but then I figure it's easier for me to run anyway.

Aw, I used to love walking. I lived downtown for four years without a car, so I used to walk everywhere but that never felt like exercise to me. On the other hand, I have fairly big boobs (for an Asian girl, at least), so running is always a big hassle for me!

 

Well there's your problem. I'm pretty much flat-chested, so I don't have that issue! I sometimes feel crap about not having bigger boobs but then I figure it's easier for me to run anyway.

 

There are definite upsides and downsides to having big boobs. I personally wish I were a C cup - I feel like that would be the perfect size, not too big and not too flat. Aside from the whole running issue, my boobs require me to go up three goddamn sizes in shirts/dresses, which means that half of what I wear makes me look super slutty and the other half terribly dowdy. Plus back when I was actually social and hung out with friends, my friends always used to think it would be hilarious to throw pieces of food down my shirt...

/#bigtittyproblems

I've nothing to add really, I just heard boobs being mentioned!

Looking beautiful as always, Elle! Great improvement, really pleased to see it.

Aw, I used to love walking. I lived downtown for four years without a car, so I used to walk everywhere but that never felt like exercise to me. On the other hand, I have fairly big boobs (for an Asian girl, at least), so running is always a big hassle for me!

 

Well there's your problem. I'm pretty much flat-chested, so I don't have that issue! I sometimes feel crap about not having bigger boobs but then I figure it's easier for me to run anyway.

 

There are definite upsides and downsides to having big boobs. I personally wish I were a C cup - I feel like that would be the perfect size, not too big and not too flat. Aside from the whole running issue, my boobs require me to go up three goddamn sizes in shirts/dresses, which means that half of what I wear makes me look super slutty and the other half terribly dowdy. Plus back when I was actually social and hung out with friends, my friends always used to think it would be hilarious to throw pieces of food down my shirt...

/#bigtittyproblems

I used to do that to my best friend. But all in good fun. She is hourglass glass shaped so she has a better shape than me anyway.

Thank you Paul.

Absolutely incredible improvement. I'm about as far through my course as you, and almost clear, but my spots have not healed up anywhere near as well as yours. Absolutely A-Mazing. I'm going to read through your log and see if there's anything you're doing that I'm not!

Looking good girl! Congrats on the progress, I hope my skin looks as great as yours when I'm that far into my course!

Lol@Paul

Hey girl! I am SOOO JEALOUS OF YOU RESULTS! But I am also so so happy for you! I am so glad that this drug is working so well for you!

I am still into about day 40 or so and I am still scabby on my face My face is healing at the moment and I still get one small whitehead each day (or every other day or so) and so I am feeling discouraged Its really hard playing this waiting game....I want clear skin already...sorry im griping at the moment.

I used to do that to my best friend. But all in good fun. She is hourglass glass shaped so she has a better shape than me anyway.

Oh no, not you too! Jk jk. Like you said, all in good fun. I'm jealous of pure hourglass shapes - I'm like an hourglass/apple hybrid. My measurements are hourglass but I'm probably naturally an apple, and I lack that gorgeous dramatic dip in the waist that all natural hourglasses have. What shape are you anyway?

Absolutely incredible improvement. I'm about as far through my course as you, and almost clear, but my spots have not healed up anywhere near as well as yours. Absolutely A-Mazing. I'm going to read through your log and see if there's anything you're doing that I'm not!

 

It will happen! Mine seemed to clear really quickly once it started. I don't think I'm doing anything special; just washing my face sparingly and moisturizing.

Looking good girl! Congrats on the progress, I hope my skin looks as great as yours when I'm that far into my course!

Lol@Paul

 

Thank you! I bet you will have great results too. I have such faith in 'Tane.

Hey girl! I am SOOO JEALOUS OF YOU RESULTS! But I am also so so happy for you! I am so glad that this drug is working so well for you!

I am still into about day 40 or so and I am still scabby on my face My face is healing at the moment and I still get one small whitehead each day (or every other day or so) and so I am feeling discouraged Its really hard playing this waiting game....I want clear skin already...sorry im griping at the moment.

 

Thanks Ashley!! I'm glad too! Don't feel discouraged! My face STILL gets scabby! I'll get a tiny whitehead and it will literally flake all around it (my skin is so dramatic) and then it will fall off. You'll be okay, keep your chin up! It WILL happen! The best thing is, you don't have to worry about it, it will do it all by itself so just sit back and let the magic happen and don't stress about it.

I used to do that to my best friend. But all in good fun. She is hourglass glass shaped so she has a better shape than me anyway.

Oh no, not you too! Jk jk. Like you said, all in good fun. I'm jealous of pure hourglass shapes - I'm like an hourglass/apple hybrid. My measurements are hourglass but I'm probably naturally an apple, and I lack that gorgeous dramatic dip in the waist that all natural hourglasses have. What shape are you anyway?

 

She still drops things down her cleavage all the time. When I look down, I can see my feet. I would rather be an hourglass. I'm a ruler shape so I'm fairly straight up and down, my upper half tends to hold a lot less fat than my lower half though. My ribs, spine and shoulder blades are fairly prominent (it's disgusting) but my thighs, bum and legs have a bit of padding, apart from being muscular from running like a crazy person. I'm built like a 12-year-old boy.

Last night I was walking with my dad, and telling him that I'm frustrated with work and that I feel like the problems just seem to stack up. He told me the thing that I perceived as my biggest problem was gone. I said "What are you talking about?" and he said "See, you've already forgotten about it."

He meant my skin. And he was right. I don't even think about it, even when I'm posting here, helping other people. I think about it when I come on here and update my log, but that's about the extent of it.

It almost makes me feel silly for perceiving it as my biggest problem.

Ah, don't feel too silly, I think a lot of us here have had their mind engulfed by acne thoughts. I'm so glad that it's worked well for you though

Thanks Tim! I only feel silly now because it's just gone from my mind so quickly. I worry about other things now.

hahaha, it's how life works yeah? Now I have real problems to deal with <.< A tidbit of that Ted Grossbart book I keep posting has a section on how some people don't let themselves have clear skin (picking, mindset, etc.) as a way to avoid problems/what life would be like if they had clear skin. I used my skin as a reason to avoid people and stuff, and now that my skin's relatively clear, I find that I don't have that reason to fall back on anymore. Oh, deeply ingrained problems of woeful life, Q_Q

I know, right? I used my skin as an excuse not to go out, not to see my friends, not to go on dates, everything. I used as it as an excuse not to move - I wanted my skin to look good before I moved cities. That's how firmly rooted I was. Now that my skin is clear, I have to face the fact that the reason I really couldn't do all of those things was just fear, especially with moving.

Word, tis deep. I had no idea how much of a procrastinator/avoider I was, and how often I used my acne as the reason. There should be some psych book called "So you have clear skin: now what?" Seriously, I can't believe how much I was avoiding with skin as my reason. Getting my license? Oh, I don't want an ID with acne (or I'm afraid I won't pass the test) >.>

I would buy sixteen copies of that book and then make excuses not to read it. I took ages getting my license, too. It's so liberating, though, being able to drive... I feel silly for not having done it in my teens.

I bet! that's the thing, I can drive pretty well, but I have this fear of failing the behind the wheel test, then I start over thinking things, and then I feel a bit anxious. Last thing I need is to freak out while the DMV person is in the car. "I'M JUST HAVING A PANIC ATTACK BECAUSE I AVOIDED THIS FOR SO LONG AND I USED MY SKIN AS AN EXCUSE BUT REALLY I'M SCARED OF FAILING AND ANXIOUS ABOUT BEING ANXIOUS AND IT'S A VICIOUS CYCLE LOLOLOL PULL OVER" :S