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Thanks mandy
Alright folks whats the deal not messing with my face is not making my face get better but since I've stopped touching my face has only gotten noticably worse. 3 new cheek cysts and inflamation of old ones, and the return of whiteheads which I havent been getting at all for months.
I'm another one who decided to sign up to comment on your log. 
I guess the decision was made when I found out you have the same birthday as me (Nov. 7)... so happy birthday!
I've been dealing with hormonal acne for quite some time... My dermatologist appointment is next Wednesday. It's been a few years since I've been to one, so I'm becoming fairly anxious. I've already gone the topical and antibiotics routes (many times over), so we're going to talk about Spiro. We shall see...
Anyway, I just wanted to wish you good luck with the Accutane. I have some friends/family members who had great results with it.
So today or yesterday rather was interesting. I still have the jawline cyst but the accutane is working overtime on them it seems because of the excessive skin shedding going on, but just below those next to my adams apple is something different. Its like a perfect bubble about an inch in diameter and about a half an inch tall but it has no heads, and it doesnt seem to be affected like the others. It might be because its large enough that when ever i look down it squeezes in the crease of my neck which is constantly aggravating the swelling. Anyways its very noticible and annoyingly painful so I went down to Student Health Services to see what they could do, but they we're closed so I swung down to the ER to see if I could get a doctor to take a look at it and maybe help me out. When I finally got up to the registration counter the guy asked why I was there and i basically just showed him and he noticably flinched (I was surprised at that because he does work in a hospital), and started taking my info down. It was going to cost me over $100 to just see a doc so I actually decided to not register, but as i was walking out this elderly man in a wheel chair whose clothes suggested homeless asked me if I had cancer and pointed to my neck. I shook my head, but didnt say anything and walked out to my car. I think I'll drop in my derms office when I go home on monday and see if I can talk to him even though I dont have an appointment and get his opinion on what I should do about it.
Very good idea to get that checked out. I don't blame you one bit for being phased by the $100; that's pretty darn hefty! Ouch.
I'm sure it's 'just' another one of those dratted cysts, but one that large may need something more for it. Like an antibiotic. You wouldn't be given a cycline antibiotic as those are contraindicated on Accutane in general due to increased risk of side effects, but don't be so leary of antibiotics! They can considerably help with a breakout such as yours and reduce the inflammation and swelling, too. Antibiotics don't just kill bacteria, they also help with inflammation and that alone is a major help in most infections.
So I just took my nightly shower and I got out and was applying aloe to my when I felt that all to familiar wetness on my neck. I check to see which jawline cyst was leaking this time, and it was the big boy that I talked about in my last post. I wiped off the stuff with a kleenex and there was no hole that I could see (given its in a hard spot to examine). This cyst has been so bothersome that I couldnt resist giving it a little squeezy doodle, and another gloop rolled out. Whats extra wierd about this stuff is its very very thick, and a wierd color that reminded me of mucus. The stuff that the rest of my cysts weep is clearer and more runny. Anyways so I was siezed by squeeze fever and this stuff kept glooping out more and more until finally it just stopped. The cyst is still the about the same size but a little less tender now. I'm still going to talk to my derm about it if he'll see me without an appointment. Also the most persistent acne still on my face is toward the sides of my face all along where my hair falls, I was wondering if that is causation or just a correlation. If my derm thinks its causation I think I'll be breaking the dirtyman challenge even though im less than a month from finishing and getting my haircut short ASAP and off my face. My beard will still stay because of my inability to shave although its very possible that that very hair is what is making the jawliners so damn persistent. I would like to know what yall think of it all, but it will have to be soon because if I do things in Austin I have parental finacial backing so I'll be doing everything before the end of today Monday 11/12 .
Oh good gracious just reading the words beard waxing made my eyes well up.
I got to see my derm, and he agreed with me that theres a good chance that it is causation and that I should look into getting my hair cut. Unfortunately I still have to finish my essay and can't get it done today like promised so I'll have to make due at someplace cheap in San Antonio. As for the Jawliners he agreed that another round of prednisone might be the ticket, and he also told me to grab something called DomeBoil at the pharmacy. Its some kind of soak that does something that will help tackle the big red baddie. Which continues to decrease on its own thankfully. He said he didnt want to do antibiotics because of strange interactions with accutane? ... I've never heard of it but then again i didn't go to medical school. As for the wierd post times I've become sort of an insomniac in college. I'm not sure if that an accutane side effect and I made the mistake of letting it slip to my sister which means it will reach my mother and she'll want to stop everything and put me on life support.
I know i promised mid month photos and I will if I can get this essay done in time. I've already sacrificed seeing my friends from highschool at the UT vs UTSA basketball game for this essay, but I'm hoping that will be the last thing I have to give up. So now I take my leave to type up a storm. Laters
You mentioned some time back your Derm. had you or has you on 40 mg. of Tane, this is somewhat low considering I am 120 lb and not even close to what you are going through, my Derm., put me on 20 mg in the morning and and 40 mg at night. You should maybe have him re-evaluate your treatment.
Just a thought 
Ooooooooooooops, forgot to say
Happy B-Day ! 
I have dealt with life long acne since I was a sophomore in high school. Until about 6 months ago(now 26) I had pretty much tried everything known to man. I went to the derm after finally having health insurance. Lets not go there. Told her my story and we discussed the treatments of last resorts. We did talk about accutane but she wanted to try tazorac before we move on. I was like what the hell at this point. Just so you know what my acne is like, I have had large and merged cysts, few if any blackheads and many white heads. This after the years of not having access to medicines aside from over the counter stuff, there was much scaring, mostly around the cheek to mid face area. Well after trying tazorac at low dosage, which has a great drying effects but except for the fact that my face is oil filled. Yes i can literally sell it at $100 a barrel. 
We tried it for three weeks. Within 2 weeks i had small improvements, it is typically an 8 week + treatment. I was like holy crap its finally working, do not want to jinx it. I also had a chem peal done at the time to help the process further along. Well within 4 weeks and my next derm visit my co-workers and family were starting to notice. More so then i had but then again we are our own toughest critics.
Over the many years i have learned to keep my hair at a military cut because, well its easier to manage, i used to have long hair prior to the breakouts. This prevented a lot of the major cyst like break outs. Also no facial hair. It wasn't until i started using tazorac that I started growing a goatee but lol I accidentally shaved it off wasn't used to having it. I finally could grow it out if i wanted too. I am try again but who knows. 
I am now on the next higher version of tazorac and its been a God send to be honest. I still get break outs but they are greatly reduced and its gone in a day or two. My next visit is just after Thanksgiving. I am going to get another chem peal to smooth it out.
Well anyway thats my story. I have read yours since you started your treatments and and I am not sure if the drug I used will work for you but doesn't hurt to try if Accutane is not working. You are an amazing guy and defiantly a very brave soul. I really do hope that the derm can get something working for you. After all this, you surely deserve it. As much damage as this illness causes, you would think that the repairs would not be considered cosmetic, this affects your very way of life.
God speed
-- john
lol you're preaching to the choir marrieta. I've been pushing for the proper 70 -80 mg dose since I started. Instead so far I've got 20mg 20mg and 40mg. But hey what can you do, but just work with what you got. Hey i can use that in my Optimism essay lol.
] 
hey, just a question for you..
I saw when you posted those pics a little while ago, you had kind of a monster on your chest, and I mean one that's significantly bigger than all the rest. Well my situation is pretty much exactly like yours right now. I'm wondering if you've done anything about it? I mean, it'll go away eventually right? I don't have a derm scheduled for 20 days or so, and I do have a clindamycin cream I could maybe dab on it, but I don't want to irritate it. This baby's a fucking monster. Whatd you do?
hey, just a question for you..I saw when you posted those pics a little while ago, you had kind of a monster on your chest, and I mean one that's significantly bigger than all the rest. Well my situation is pretty much exactly like yours right now. I'm wondering if you've done anything about it? I mean, it'll go away eventually right? I don't have a derm scheduled for 20 days or so, and I do have a clindamycin cream I could maybe dab on it, but I don't want to irritate it. This baby's a fucking monster. Whatd you do?
Alternate heat and ice; whichever makes it hurt less. Sometimes heat will inflame them and make them throb more. Ice is usually more soothing. If you're not allergic, take some ibuprofen per package directions; that will also help reduce the inflammation. One that large one does not squeeze; that can cause the walls of the 'cyst' to rupture under the skin, causing a deeper undermined scar and/or spread the infection under the skin. Ouch.
the problem with that is that my dorm room doesn't have access to heat or ice haha, and I'm not sure how much ibuprofen would seem to do for it at this point, considering it's not too inflamed but just fucking massive. (like nickel size). Would a cortisone shot on it be better?
Can't wait to see more progress pics. Also wanted to add some words of encouragement. I had a friend who had acne that was similar to yours, but with less cysts. His doctor prescribed Accutane, and for the first 2 months he was a red, dry, acne covered mess. His lips were chapped to the point of cracking and blistering. Then it was like a light switch flipped. His skin began to clear and by month 5 his skin was smooth, soft and virtually acne free. It was amazing.
All that to say, try not to get discouraged. This can be a long process and sometimes it gets worse before it gets better, but in most cases it DOES get better. Peace and love. -C
Ello Ello
I just wanted to say I LOVE the first day of steroids bc everything is just like POW and its instant gratification. Lol somebody is going to search steroids and its going to bring them here and they'll be all confused, I'll probably getting an summons in the mail from BALCO after they're done with Bonds lol.
So I'm a little woozy right now bc I just lost 6 hours. Like I went to WRC and afterwards I came here at like noon and them the next thing I know BOOM its 6:30 at night. It might be because the last 2 nights have been all nighters, and my body just shut down. I really need to iron out my sleeping schedue because its been wacky wacky the last couple ... months really.
Soccer my friend are you talking about the infamous pseudo nipple. That guy deflated itself after the first round of roids. Definitely go hot and cold Mighty Wynne knows all. Take a hot shower, and then use an ice cube wrapped in a paper towel and apply a little pressure. You can get a little ice cube tray at walmart or target for less than a dollar just fill it up with tap and freeze it (do you have a fridge?)
Thanks for the encouragement ClareB and I know that things will get better. My parental units tried to have an intervention last night and make me stop the drug bc by what could see I've only gotten worse, and I was like would you stop chemo (not that I'm comparing acne to cancer in any way shape or form) half way through just because you weren't see the results you wanted. I told them I was going through with the course. Also sorry i couldn't get any pics for yous guys. I was typing my essay til like 5 in the morning and then I had breakfast with an old friend, and then I had to drive back here to make it to class to turn in my essay (in the process I left all the clothes I took to get washed for free which leaves me with like 3 pairs of boxers 
lol )
I'm in a cheery mood my face feels good and is healing hopefully this second round of roids will have a more lasting effect. Now I bid you adieu so I can take a hit of a accutane steroid cocktail, and get some din din before Bones comes on. Cheery-oh
Song of the Week
Miri Ben-Ari feat. Scarface - "Sunshine in the Rain"
This is an RB/rap song that is done beautifully over a violin ina very understated soulful way. Even people i know that hate hip hop like this song. Plus its got the message of your down now but sometimes sunshine can comes through the rainclouds.
I really have to say that I admire your attitude!=) You are one of a kind! The world would be a much better place if everyone had the same attitude as you! And I really belive that me, and many others can learn from you!
So I just have to wish you the best of luck, and I'm sure that you will get great skin!
Take care!=)
Hey, I read your whole log at once (obviously I'm not getting a whole lot done today) and wanted to let you know that I think your skin really is improving. I took retin-a before accutane and freaked out because for the first few months I seemed to break out less in the places I normally did and really badly in areas that were usually clear. I also had about five interconnected cysts on my jawline that oozed pus for months. After five and a half months on accutane there is barely a red mark in that area.
About your dosage I agree that it's pretty low. I am on 40 mg and I only weigh 118 lbs. Most people your size are on 70 or 80. Anyways you are already an inspiration and a wonderful writer. AND I know your reading list is long but Alfred Bester is one of the most amazing science fiction writers ever and if you have time to check him out try The Demolished Man. They originally asked him to write the screenplay for Superman but went with someone else because he actually * Gasp* wanted to spend more than a week writing it. And he invented some of Marvel comics best super villains. Keep writing and we'll all keep reading.
Thanks peoples its good to hear from yall.
So i broke the dirty man challenge today by getting my hair cut it simply had to be done for the sake of clear skin. My beard is still here due to my inability to cut it. Its rather outrageous now that my hair is cut, but oh well.
The last of the prednisone has worn off it seems as my jawline is slowly swelling back up with cysts. I get to go visit my dad's side of the family for Thanksgiving in Arkansas. They are very .... anti-subtle so i think I'll be getting plenty of statements like "Your face looks awful". Ahh the holidays right.
Hey man,
I just want to say that reading your whole blog (which I did in one day.. wow, I'm a loser.) has been such an inspiration for me. You're totally upbeat. I understand everything you're going through. Happy belated 19th birthday, and have an awesome thanksgiving!! Keep your chin up! It seems that you've got alot of friends on this website who're pulling for you. Things will work out, I know it.
~Bill
I'm lucky to have yall rooting for me.
I just woke up to the wonderful sight of my jawline hidden completely beneath swelling. I took some ibuprofen and fish oil so we'll see how that works out. I just cant figure out what the catalyst for these jawlines are. The accutane is dominating everything, but them and the funny thing is that they didnt even show up til i was in like month 2 of accutane ... Wierd.
Song of the Week
MercyMe - "Bring The Rain"
This song is really religious so I'm sorry for those who wont benifit from it, but its message really drives me when things are really awful so I thought it was important for me to share it. The internet here at my dorm is horrible right now and I'm having trouble uploading it so I'll try later check back tonight and it should be up.
I felt I should let you know, Aloe Vera in and of itself is not a moisturizer. In fact the closer you get to 100% pure the more drying it is.
Call me nuts but I add a few drops of olive oil to my aloe vera gel. Makes a lot of difference. Start with 3 or 4 drops and see how that goes.
Good luck