This might be long but im going to start from the top. Im 24 years old. I suffer from seriouse back acne scars all over my back from childhood acne. Im not worried about my face, i just dont think ill ever be able to take my shirt off and I basically blame the treatment i was on as a child but ill go into detail of that later. I met this girl at work about 2 years ago. I fell in love. We never "officially" dated, because she had ex boyfriend issues and i was hiding my acne scars. But there is something seriouse between us. Its been a roller coaster these past 2 years with her because i never really got a chance to get seriouse with her beacause im afraid of her reaction when she sees my body. We never had sex, we have only kissed plenty of times, we sleep together multiple times but my insecurities makes it harder for me to take it to the next level with her. When i have cloths on i look completely normal. Im a good looking guy buy this issue holds me back from so much,
Im losing this girl, i can already tell she is giving up on me and i dont blame her because im pushing her away. This girl that i have feelings for loves going to the beach, she likes to model, i think she is the most gorgeus thing in the world. How am i suppose to fit into her life? How am i suppose to share this burden of mine with her? I have pushed her away so much because i hide so much when it comes to going to the beach or going swimming or anything that might involve me taking my shirt off. I have made excuses to bail on her or not do things with her that im suprised she has been this patient with me. Can she love me back truely with this freakshow? I feel like i have been living a double life because when people meet me, they see im an attractive guy but they dont know about the scars that i hide with cloths on. Im severely depressed but i hide it so well. Noone sees my depression, i hide it with laughter and smiles everyday.
My question is what do i do with this girl? Would it be better just to show her that im stronge and the scars dont affect me? Would that make her more attracted to me? OR should i open up to her and tell her my deepest darkest secrete, because i dont think i can do it without tears coming to my eyes. What will she think when i break down and finnally show her whats been holding me back from taking the next step. Im going to show pictures of me and a picture of my back. Keep in mind that the picture with the scars are a lot worse in person. You cant see its full extent. I dont really get acne anymore. Its just the dark spots and scars that have been left behind.
Honestly, it's not that bad. It looks like freckles or sunspots if anything. Just tell her how you feel and I'm sure she'll understand. Coming from a girl, it means a lot if a guy is honest and reveals insecurities. If she really loves you and wants to be with you, she won't even blink. Good luck! 
Hey man, I just wanted to chime in here because this post really resonated with me and I feel like I can completely identify with your situation right now. I've been told I'm a good looking guy before and girls flirt with me all the time, but if they only knew the amount of insecurity I have due to scars/skin issues then it would likely blow them away. You describe it as a "deep dark secret" and I feel like that is so apt, that's exactly what it feels like....this shadow that just lingers over your life and is ALWAYS there when it comes to interactions with girls you like, romance, relationships, etc.
I feel like acne affects both genders in such a negative way, with girls in this modern age the media is always putting out this perfect image of beauty that they feel like they need to aspire towards (I can only imagine how rough that is for women who struggle with skin issues) but for guys (and I speak from experience here) we are taught growing up that men need to be confident, men need to be strong...as men we're supposed to hide our insecurities and be confident and assertive because girls find insecure men unattractive. It's very hard for anyone to understand what that feels like unless you're a guy struggling with this type of issue that just haunts such an important aspect of your life.
I've done the exact same thing you've done. I've distanced myself from girls who show interest in me, I've pushed them away when they get too close, I've made excuses...and it's all to cover up the skin issues that bother me. It's a hopeless cycle and it really, really sucks.
My advice to you? Open up to this girl and be 100% honest with her about how these scars make you feel. Don't hold back, just put it all out in the open and let the weight of it be lifted from your shoulders. It sounds to me like she really loves you and once you tell her how this makes you feel she'll be completely understanding and maybe even willing to help you out as much as she can. And if not? She's not worth being with. The important thing is that you get it off your chest sooner rather than later.
I know what it feels like to be torn between being that strong, confident male that society expects you to be and opening up about your biggest insecurity...but in the long run you gotta realize we're all human and we all have our imperfections. Tell her how these scars truly make you feel...and put the ball into her court.
I think you'll be pleasantly surprised with her reaction and the support she's willing to give you, because I'm sure she has her own imperfections that she's scared to open up to you about too. Consider it an opportunity to let the relationship evolve and grow stronger.
Best of luck to you, man!
I really doubt she'll care. And honestly, I feel like for men at least, body acne is not like a big turn off? I find that a lot of guys just have a lot of spots on their body, not necessarily acne but just scars or marks or whatever. On a woman it would be deemed "unattractive". Double standards I guess, but at least it works in your favour! I mean your face is clear and if we're going to be shallow here, that's all that reallyyyy matters.
