Hey everybody, first time poster here, long time reader.

First off, I hope everybody here will get through what I feel like is one of the hardest things to deal with in life. I recently just got out of basic training and went through OSUT at Fort Benning. As you can probably guess, I am dealing with moderate acne, which about a month ago when I got out of Army Basic training was severe.

But to back track a bit, let me rewind a few years and let me give you a relatively quick rundown.

Throughout my high school career, I dealt with the occasional pimple here and there, nothing serious. My complexion was pretty much 100% clear 99% of the time. However, I headed off to military college and that is when things started to turn. I had started drinking tons of milk over the summer before I left and noticed a few more pimples popping up but thought nothing more of it. When college started, it got stressful being a new freshman at a military college. After 8 weeks I was able to contact family again and around this time it was noticeable that I had an increase in acne on cheek area. Again, thought nothing of it, mom got me some new facial products. Fast forward to thanksgiving, all of a sudden I have a bit more on my forehead. Started to bother me a bit, but not enough to make me think too much of it. Continued using face products that I had from October and went on with my life. Fast forward again to Christmas break, at this point, its the worst I have ever had it. Cheeks, chin and forehead are really bad. At this point I get a appointment to go to the dermatologist. I was scared and embarrassed and confused, as I had no clue what to expect. But let me tell you, it was a life changing experience. She put me on some salicylic products and exfoliating cleansers as well as AHA and night creams (introduced about a month in to new regimen) as well as several microderms. Over the course of 2 1/2 months I went from horrible acne to absolutely clear with all scars (which were very bad) almost 100% gone. It was an amazing transformation over such a short period of time. I was more confident then ever, and was able to live my life again. I simply had given up my gross amount of milk that I had been drinking and started eating a bit healthier with vegetables. However, still ate everything else I would on a daily basis minus deserts and candies. This included bread, meat, etc. I was happy as could be, and really enjoyed the next few months where I had no worries with how I looked. I would actually look in the mirror and smile, realizing how blessed I had been.

I went on spring break feeling great. Ate terrible including white rice, white bread, spam (we were on tight budget), oreos, soda, and drank a lot over the course of a week. And had no repercussions what so ever! The regimen I was on was truly working and I had nothing to worry about. I had thought I had beat the acne and was able to cut back on products in regimen I used to simply exfoliating cleanser, salicylic acid, and night cream. (cut out AHA). Things were going great!

Now we fast forward to summer time, right before shipping out to basic training and AIT for a total of 16 weeks in Georgia counting reception. Now I was worried they would take my face products from me and did not bring a whole lot of it. I figured I would resupply at the 10 week mark for family day. My face is now looking so good that I had little to no worry about it. So I go off to basic training in a great mood, haha. Skip ahead to shark attack (Day 1 after reception), we are doing stuff throwing our gear all around. Just so happens that I smash my salicylic acid and it breaks, with only enough left for about two weeks. Well skip ahead to week 10 and my side of face has now broken out pretty bad, but just the one side as well as the forehead on that side. Its got me pretty down, and I am a bit upset. However, looking back, I should have considered myself grateful. Well now its week 12 and we spend a week in the field, not washing face due to no running water. I do the best I can with what I got, but by the end of the training, my face was a mess. Not to mention, as the last two weeks back at the barracks progress, it keeps getting worse. Finally get to go home and see my dermatologist. She obviously felt bad due to the fact that I went from looking absolutely great 4 months ago to the complete opposite.

While I was happy to be home, it was really hard to be positive most of the time. I spent many hours just thinking about how bad my face looked. Both sides of my face were really jacked up and I spent hours just thinking about the days where I was clear. I managed to get my hands on some tinted moisturizer that covered it up amazingly without hinting at the fact that I had make up on. It allowed me to see friends and everyone without them seeing how bad it had gotten. It got me through the day, but in the end I still had acne, and I knew it.

While I had gone through it before, and will get through it again, its harder this time. Having battled it and won the fight in a landslide, to have to wage war with acne once again is just mentally exhausting. Its been over a month now since starting the regimen back up again, and things are better, but not great. I have high hopes over the next 4 weeks that things will get much better to the point where I can just feel good enough to be in public without thinking everyone is staring at me for my skin condition. People act like its my fault I have terrible acne and that all I need to do is wash my face. People always say "man you need some face wash". I usually just rub it off, but I feel like saying, "Really guy? Like I haven't heard of washing my face before? Like you think I haven't done everything I can to solve this problem??"

People don't get it, and its usually the ones that have never had to deal with acne before. I'll never wish for them to experience that problem as well though as I never want to see anyone go through what myself and many others are going through on a daily basis. Acne is no fun, its mentally exhausting, makes you lose confidence in yourself, is uncomfortable and plans on staying unless you do something about it which for some doesn't even work.

But I know that if I continue fighting it, I will get through it again. I feel like stress more than anything is what is holding me back, for this is hard to handle after winning the fight with acne once before and having to do it again is hard.

I am sorry for long post, I actually left a lot of information out, but thought I would share this with you. I have plans on worrying less, and with my already very healthy diet, and current skin regimen I should be clear soon. But the scars are a constant reminder of what I have had to deal with already, and is something I think about many times a day. But I know it will get better, and it will for you too, or at least I hope. For no one should have to deal with acne. I consider myself lucky that I was clear in high school and only developed acne at a predominately male military college and now at a military base where its mostly men. Makes looking good not as much of a factor but when girls are around, I have zero confidence. But I hope to change that very soon.

Best of luck to you all, and hope everyone can get through the hard times.

Butters