Quote

You seem very angry. [Edited image out]

Someone said once "In a perfect world men and women would be different but equal". But it's never going to be a perfect world. Let's face it; it's 2013! [Edited image out] If people were ever going to evolve to the point where you wouldn't see all the problems we see today we wouldn't be seeing them today. There will always be people who unlike you and me discriminate and/or are sexist. It's never going to change.

But what I meant was that the kid who started this thread may not actually be sexist. He might just be a parrot or someone who hasn't started thinking about things (despite being 16) and instead is still reacting to impulses or is letting himself be led by his emotions. If he grows up, he'll speak differently about women and look at them differently. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt though. But why shouldn't I? And why shouldn't you?

If you truly are concerned with the rights women have (I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt as well as there are a lot of phonies out there) then in and of itself it's only admirable that you speak passionately about it (having said that I think it's pointless as you can't change anyone's mind about anything, they can only do that themselves and you can't help them with it) but I do have to wonder why you're so focussed only on women's rights? Why not call yourself a human rights activist instead? [Edited image out] That's a question not advice.

Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to sound too aggressive D:

I think it's a bit too early to say whether oppression will always exist. Human life hasn't been around that long, after all. I doubt that much will change in our lifetime, though

I am focused on human rights, or at least I try to be. But there was something explicitly sexist, or seemingly sexist (I had not seen his age- thank you for pointing it out) that I saw here, so I pointed it out. I would do the same thing if I saw something racist, abelist, heterosexist, transmisogynistic, or cissexist. If I'm leaving out any forms of oppression please let me know D:

While it is hard to change most people's minds, it isn't completely impossible. Sometimes it just takes some patience, which I unfortunately don't have too much of D:

ANYWAYS, sorry for the long rant geesh

Back on topic:

cammytammy and armadillo really hit the nail on my head, or at least in my book.

The only thing I'd add to cammytammy's post is that you confidence building isn't always done alone- it varies from person to person. I was kind of stuck for a while confidence-wise until I met my partner, and the same goes for them. This is why meeting people online can be so great; it takes a lot of pressure off of a lot of people, so it's easier to let your guard down a little.

And it's important to realize that guys aren't the only ones who can be creepy for doing this- it's just that girls tend to do it less often. It's incredibly rare to find a girl approach a stranger on a bus and tell them how beautiful they are and how much they want to date them. Even if the person doing it was attractive, the forwardness can be really unsettling.

On 1/23/2013 at 3:08 AM, twerp said:

Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to sound too aggressive D:

I think it's a bit too early to say whether oppression will always exist. Human life hasn't been around that long, after all. I doubt that much will change in our lifetime, though

I am focused on human rights, or at least I try to be. But there was something explicitly sexist, or seemingly sexist (I had not seen his age- thank you for pointing it out) that I saw here, so I pointed it out. I would do the same thing if I saw something racist, abelist, heterosexist, transmisogynistic, or cissexist. If I'm leaving out any forms of oppression please let me know D:

While it is hard to change most people's minds, it isn't completely impossible. Sometimes it just takes some patience, which I unfortunately don't have too much of D:

ANYWAYS, sorry for the long rant geesh [Edited image out]

Thanks for the reply.

I know quite a few girls with clear skin going out with guys with visible acne, but they always seem to be a bit older, at school a lot of the girls i.e. the 'popular' ones were shallow with that sort of thing (lol no chip on my shoulder honest) but I'm guessing media has a greater influence at that stage in life.

Personally acne on a guy has no influence on my opinion of him, in fact I kind of find a few box scars on a guy attractive!

I know quite a few girls with clear skin going out with guys with visible acne, but they always seem to be a bit older, at school a lot of the girls i.e. the 'popular' ones were shallow with that sort of thing (lol no chip on my shoulder honest) but I'm guessing media has a greater influence at that stage in life.

Personally acne on a guy has no influence on my opinion of him, in fact I kind of find a few box scars on a guy attractive!

Totally agree.

The media has a lot to answer for when it comes to outward appearance.

Sorry that I haven't responded to any of your guys responses. But I truly do appreciate them.

I guess I look at it like this: I have acne, and it is what it is. I'm doing all I can do about it, so at this point it will just take its route, whatever that may be. Throughout the process of this with regards to females, I try to tell myself f*** your face and get over it as much as you can. I understand that I am probably at a disadvantage, so to me that means I have to excel in other parts (being funny, nice, considerate, maximize attractiveness, being confident, etc.) so hopefully the female will look over the acne and see the advantages/perks I do offer. Now of course this is much harder then it sounds, and maintaining this moto is hard. But I try to tell myself stop being the scared one and go out there and get it. Approach her with confidence and make it noticed that I am worth her time. I try to tell myself, what is the worse that can happen? I could be nice, try my hardest, and yeah I could get rejected, and that could hurt, but you gotta move on. I try to go in with the mindset that my other traits will overcome my acne around her, and she will like me.

This acne time will past. May be longer for me then others, but its whatever. I try to live my life to the fullest and live with no regrets.

Hope this post helps anyone.

 

I could be nice, try my hardest, and yeah I could get rejected, and that could hurt, but you gotta move on. I try to go in with the mindset that my other traits will overcome my acne around her, and she will like me.

If you "try hard" you probably will get rejected. Plus this whole thinking where people go "I have to bring my best qualities forward so that people will see I am worth their time" is unsophisticated.

I sound very "negative" again. But I'm sorry people, it's just my opinion.

The best of luck, baseketball4. I hope you make some girl very happy some day.

Seriously I told myself that after getting a clear skin I'll think about a girlfriend till then my computer is my girlfriend because it really helps me and doesn't let me get bored

Crazy as it sounds, I actually find guys with acne attractive I would love to find a guy with acne because then he would understand what I'm going through.

Sometimes it feels like nobody knows how hard dealing with acne is and I can feel really alone. Having a boyfriend who has also experienced this would be really reassuring and I could be sure he wasn't silently judging me for my acne.

Have hope.

Yea it's kinda hard when they won't even look you in the fuckin eye when you try to talk to em.

Then you look in the mirror and remember oh yea that's right I have the skin of a 50 year old crack head even tho I eat healthy,exercise daily, wash my face twice a day, change my pillow case and sheets everyday, avoid junk food, moisturize, tone, supplement, don't smoke, don't drink, don't stay up late, meditate, research every day for newer and better treatments, diets, different probiotics, allergies ext.

FUCK YOU ACNE. YOU SUCK THE LIFE OUT OF ME.

^^^ agree can't wait until I have clear skin and can look in the mirror and be like "that right acne, you can go fuck yourself" I will probably cry on that day. Also what do guys think about girls with acne? I feel like girls are suppose to have "perfect" and "flawless" skin. Like I feel like if I get acne on my chest or back I can't wear low shirts or bikinis. And when I exercise I have to wear shirts up to my neck instead if a sports bra.

^^^ agree can't wait until I have clear skin and can look in the mirror and be like "that right acne, you can go fuck yourself" I will probably cry on that day. Also what do guys think about girls with acne? I feel like girls are suppose to have "perfect" and "flawless" skin. Like I feel like if I get acne on my chest or back I can't wear low shirts or bikinis. And when I exercise I have to wear shirts up to my neck instead if a sports bra.

Some guys are going to care, others won't. lol

An online dating site made exclusively for acne-people might work. Acnester.com, OKAcne.com, acnecupid.com, acnebook, acnefinder, etc.

Yes, they generally do care. Society is not going to change, so you have to if you want to get on in life.

Today whoist walking in town a saw three guys yes three with worse acne than me walking ahnd in hand with attractive women acne does matter to some women no doubt but its wrong to suggest all women are shallow. In my exp women like a bloke who can look after them,be caring,funny and good at listening. Some women beleive it or not may not like someone with crsytal clear skin and vanity. And if a girl rejected me only becuase I have acne red marks then sod her shes not worth my time why be concered over vacous people ill prob look alot better than her when im older anyway as i take care of myself etc. Rant over:)

A face can't love you.. It does not matter to me one bit if you have acne or any type of skin imperfection. I believe in inner beauty people are too caught up on looks it makes me sad.. oh well can't change the world just strive to be a wonderful person despite your acne and the perfect person will come a long and see you for who you truly are.

Me personally if i had clear skin and i saw a guy who had acne wheather it is mild, moderated or severe acne i just wouldnt care. I sitll have acne so i wouldnt have any problems dating a guy who has acne, because believe it or not, people are going to tell you that yes girls do care about a guys skin and looks but once you see someone you really like so much, then you just wouldnt care. I have a friend she has super clear skin, very attractive but her boyfriend has moderated acne and she just doesnt care and loves him very much.

A month ago i went to have dinner with a friend...well it was more like a date, i really like him alot and i know he likes me back too (we are now going out) i decided to go to have dinner with him all makeup free. ALL MAKEUP FREE!!! no makeup in my face, no foundation i didnt even wore lipstick or eyeliner. He saw me a few days ago with makeup on so i decided to go out this time with makeup free. Which i dont know how i had the courage to do it, because my skin was looking pretty bad especially it was winter. So the wind that was hitting my face real hard it made my skin looks worst!, (dont know why but when its Summer my skin looks much better than in Winter) anyways, i decided to face him with my real skin. He never stared at my skin, he just made eye contact and told me how beautiful im. What am trying to say is that if someone is going to feel very attracted to you, that person will look past your skin. Believe me when i say this to you or any others who are in this blog. I always tell my girlfriends, no matter what you have in your face, bad skin, pimples, red marks etc if you feel beautiful and have confidence in yourself people will totally look past your acne.

I dont have a good skin at all, i seem to have a very untone skin, in some places especiall around my mouth its more red while my cheeks are white and my chin is a little bit red too. And there were not only guys but also girls who would just tell me how pretty im and they like the way i dress and bla bla bla. Some girls give me dirty looks because they are jealous of me because of my looks and i STILL HAVE ACNE. What am trying to say with all these things is that a real girl who really loves you would not care about your skin. If she does cares about your skin to the point of not dating you then she is a selfish shallow bitch. Dont waste your time with those shallow people they are not worth your time.

Well from my experience, girls my age (I'm 19) are more attracted to guys without acne and who's to blame them. I know I generated a lot more interest when my skin was better...perhaps for more than physical reasons....I feel really uneasy and self conscious and generally down beat when my acne is bad and what girl wants/likes that. I know when I'm clear I'll have more success with women and in social situations in general...the confidence and weight off your back with constant clear skin must be incredible.

I don't really think girls with or without acne differ in their views on this but rather that some are shallow than most..? ) When I still had clear skin before in high school, my friends always tease me because I always crush on someone that you would not think of as handsome. But is it my fault I don't obsess about looks that much? But seriously though, no matter the severity of acne (or lack of it) what matters to most girls, or most that I have talked to, is a guys' confidence. Someone who is confident of himself but not boastful and is down to earth and has manners. Overall, a decent and nice guy who is not embarrassed of himself and who has a sense of humor. ) I don't mean that anybody who's insecure about their flaws (um, like, everyone?) is instantly kicked to the curb but more on If you just ignore your acne and be confident with what you've got, most probably most people would also overlook your physical flaws as well and start acknowledging your awesome personality

An online dating site made exclusively for acne-people might work. Acnester.com, OKAcne.com, acnecupid.com, acnebook, acnefinder, etc.

lol this has be laughing on the side note I don't mind a girl with acne I seen so many girls who have mild to moderate acne be so positive that im actually attracted to them in the end you have to think about it are you attracted to someone's personality and the way they are or their skin?

Girls with acne find it harder I think. If you don't have any scarring and have mild/moderate acne then finding girls should not be a problem. If you have severe acne then instead of chasing girls you should be chasing derms. But yeah if you are chasing smoking hot girls then acne is a big problem. I have figured that really tall girls find it hard too. So there are other issues also.

I have a female friend who likes me and we were spending some time together. She started massaging my shoulders and it turned into a full back massage. Then she tried to pull up my shirt to massage the skin. I stopped her and told her I had really bad back acne. She said she'd had it too at times, and it didn't seem to bother her at all.

Women want the same thing we do: someone to LOVE them, spend time with them, and be there for them. Some haven't figured that out yet, but you don't want to deal with that type anyway. Be you, don't worry too much, and someone will give you attention when you least expect it

Okay I know this is a little repeated but -NOBODY LIKES ACNE! I'm not going to lie and say I have bad acne. I really don't. I do have skin problems and cannot wear make-up because it makes my skin break out in a horrible rash. I only have tiny pimples on my forehead really. The only thing I will say is that sometimes my nose breaks out in embarrassing (huge- not exaggerating) zits. I hate going to school with them and am embarrassed to be around my crush. To be honest I would want to be with somebody who has skin problems maybe as we'll. I hope that doesn't sound shallow.

That's really awesome. I hope it works out

Hey so I'm a 20 year old guy and I scrolled past this not expecting to actually reply before browsing, but I thought I'd share a little something that might help.

I've gone through points in my life where I've had severe acne, 1-2 pimples, and too absolutely clear complexion for months at a time; like wise, my confidence has fluctuated from high to low and I've learned to work with it.

Even today as I was searching for some kind of remedy to get rid of a narly pimple on my forehead before I go out with this girl I've been seeing, I find myself a little irritated.

Now this girl is an easy 9/10 so I always feel constantly challenged to look my best, especially since all of her girl friends have beautiful complexions.

The truth is I've dated many girls, when I've had a lot of acne or less, of course my success rate again fluctuated, not because of my appearance but because girls can sense when your insecure about yourself and it bores them.

What's always worked for me is just call them beautiful, call yourself beautiful, hell say some rediculously random thing to make them laugh or even for yourself. You just gotta not care and they won't either.

And I'm not gonna lie their will be girls that will blow you off because of some ugly pimples; trust me I know! But it's a hit and miss game, and when you hit usually it's worth it.

My advice the next time you see someone absolutely gorgeous, just walk up to them with no intention of getting their phone number and call them stunning. I do it all the time and it's not cause I'm the greatest looking guy in the world but because I believe in karma, and when you make someone feel good it tends to always come back around, I promise.

I don't like acne but I may like YOU. are you acne? No, of course not. This is just silly.