Notifications
Clear all
- Here are a few steps that after long hard thought and after being so fed up of lying in bed not wanting to get up messing up what potentially could be a bright future for me. Having acne at the age of 27 from the age of 18 is undoubtly hard. It would knock the confidence of more or less everyone and can make one very miserable. There is nothing more miserbale than waking up to a face with fresh spots and I expereince this more or less everyday in the same old areas!.. However ive decided to fight all this Ive died enough inside now. As suffers as much as wed like to hide away from the world, the truth is we carnt. So many days in my life have been wasted by my repulsion towards my own skin. Being a naturally freindly and sociable person I feel extrmely lonley and im missing out on things that all good human beings deserve such as a nice relationship,a home to call there own a family etc etc.
- Some of the pain ive gone through and also the pain you guys will have gone through makes me sad. We all have talents and we are so much more than just our skin. I know that im a loving,caring,good humoured person with intelligence and I would like to make a postive difference in peoples lives. Im sure everybody on here has a talent something that they are good at whether it be a prime athelte,nutrtionist to a great scientist even being something as trival as an amazing movie buff. WE ARE ALL HUMAN BEINGS even thorugh we often dont feel like it AND WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO HAVE THE NICE THINGS IN LIFE IF WE WORK hard. Sorry for the caps guess im a bit emotinal but you see my point?. Now onto the plan ive devised for myself and others feeling in a similar way to deal with my situation and the fact I may still have acne for a while yet while I work on treating it physcially.
- 1. Acceptance-Im going have to accept that due to the long term nature of this there will be an indefinte time frame of breaking out untill finally something works for me. Treatments are trail and error for example my current regimine has totally cleared up my forehead unlike any other but acne on my cheeks persists so It may be a case of changing this is a month or two down then line and starting again. This could be the same for you guys and mentally youve got to gear yourself up for that. Its almost like expecting the worst but keeping up with youre treatment for a good amount of time. Treatments dont work magically over night ive made that mistake so many times in the past. So im sticking to this one and I may be pleasantly suprised but i must learn not to be dejected if it hasnt worked out.
- 2Admitting youre suffering to close freinds,family even co workers yuou trust.-How often have you felt like youre hiding a huge secret from everybody?. You are scared/.wondering what another person is thinking if there anylasing youre skin?. Yes I bet everyone here has no matter what degree of their acne. Well youve got to be brave and point it out that is bothering you otherwise its going destroy you emotinally staying silent always does. If they are truely worthy of youre time then they will listen and not be judgemental as you would think. They may even be able to offer you practical advice as often they will know somebody who has suffered from acne.
- 3. This is similar to point two again it involves pointing it out. Say youve jsut broken out and youve got a social event you really carnt miss involving youre close freinds or family who you love dearly and are a bit ashmed of how you are looking. Youd love to be at home hiding away but you carnt youd let too many people down and it would be wierd cancelling suddenly after promisng youd be there jsut a couple of days before the latest breakout. (god so many times have I done this). To get round this youve got to learn to disarm youre anxieties by speaking to people about it being honest. Ie Situation I bump into an old freind from university who I was close with and otherwise aside from my breakout id love to see "hi Rob how are you lovely to see you after all these years,what are you up at the moment?"-"Well im not too good my acnes playing up sucks to have teenage skin in an adults body I telll you, aside from that im ok been training for this half marathon and trying to finish this damn essay. How are you by the way I heard youre getting married ah wow congratulations?". People will notice youre acne if its at least mild moderate like mine. In this hypothetical conversation I have dealt with my aniexty by coming out into the open about it injecting a bit of cliched humour, then changing the subject quickly and also being intrested in the other person. Sure acne is an undesribale thing but at most social gatherings with family and freinds youre around people who like you for youre personailty,so its unlikely there going to be overly crical or harsh and if they are then there not worth talking to. The responce will proberly suprise you as it 90 percent of the time wont be horrible it may be sympathetic,dismissive ie "ah rob its not that bad ive seen lots worse" or it could even as mentioned before be constructive "funny you should mention that Rob my fiancee suffers from adult acne and shes used this new products range which has really helped clear it up" etc.
- 4. Mirror avoidance-My main trouble is mirrors and lighting judging how bad I really look . Im sure im not alone in this. I can look at mirrors for up to 2 hours a day. I scruntinize every aspect of my face to see where potentially im going break out next and if theres any spots I can pop etc. Im going to have to combat this as it can ruin the day before its even began and it wastes soo much time. Like today i was perfectly fine in a good frame of mind and I was making progress on my essay unitll I wnet to the bathroom and noticed a new sport forming I picked it and made it 5 times worse. I think what im going to do is have three periods in the day where I look then try my hardest not to look outside these times. In time this will be reduced to when i wake in the morning and before I go to bed. I will have to be strict with this and it will be very very hard at first but in the long run its for the best. I suggest people with similar aniextys try the same. Also accept that some lighting is going be more harsh than others and theres nothing you can do about it.
- 5. Work out-Im a very talented runner and at least when Im running im away from mirrors im doing something I enjoy and im relesing stress. Obv you dont have to run could be going to the gym,a long walk going out on youre bike etc. It really does help you and youre buliding a better body getting healthier which are only good things.Ive felt so bad recently i stopped running now ive entered a half marathon so it gives me an aim I want to do well in it regardless of if I have acne or not.
- 6.Read about how people with facial disfigurment cope- This helped me alot. There are some people and im not exgarreating would bite youre hand off to have youre acne as opposed to a severe facial disfigurment which is not just deemed ugly and repulsive by soicety but is also very painful and life threatning. I understand that severe acne and severe scarring can count as disfigurment too but remeber at least you have youre facial structure ,youre eyes,youre hair even youre smile. Alot of people out there have to cope with even worse predjuice than you or I do remeber that when youre feeling down.
- 7. Have a plan of action to treat it physically. I touched on this before in making the trail and error point. Clarify in youre mind what youre going to do to treat it in the next few months. write it down and stick to it. This way you can at least feel in a bit of control of ther situation. Ie my plan is to carry on with my current regimine and diet changes and then see where im at in April. If better continue. If worse look at other products,consider peels lasers or even sigh acctuane. If youre confused about what plan to make seek advice here,email derms, go to the docotors for an appointment do youre own research. Being proactive can help with the feelings of hopelessness.
- 8. Make an effort in being interested in other people and remember people have their own securities that we dont know about even if they have pristine glowing skin etc. Everyone has there hang ups. Maybe someone who has clear skin is avoiding eye contact with you because there hung up about thier thinning hair,there teeth, there nose or the amount of weight theve put on. Every human being has a flaw even if its hidden.
- I could write a few more but im tired and its late and I could do with a rest from thinking from acne related issues for tonight. Anyway I hope that at least one person can find a bit of solace from my own struggle and the ways im trying to come to terms with it and deal with it. Feel free to add me as a freind PM it helps even though this is a virtual community having people go through the same thing. Good night you beautiful people:).
- Apologies for my spelling and grammar toodles:)
Thank you 
I really struggle with the mirror thing too. Some days I will waste hours in the bathroom. My mother thinks I have an internet addiction and am hiding out in the bathroom with my phone and she calls me irresponsible, especially since I'm a couple months from being legally an adult. But I could never bring myself to tell her what I'm really doing. Some days I just want to put a paper bag over my head.
I know all too well about mirror obsession. My acne is on the back of my neck and my back. Looking into a hand-mirror backwards into another mirror so I can see the back of my neck can be quite depressing. I started accutane(Clavaris) 26 days ago and things are looking up. I broke out in my usual places on day 11 but my neck is almost totally clear today. My scalp still has a few painful lesions and my back has a 4 or 5 deep cysts but the medicine is working. The oil slick that was my body and hair has normalized.
Looking2thefuture, I can tell your skin really has you bummed out. I'm a 43 year old active male and feel your pain. After trying all the antbiotics, diet restrictions, topicals over the counter and Rx, I made the choice to try the only solutrion left. Do your research and seriously consider a course of (sigh) accutane. The IB may suck but you will be clear in the end. Cheers.