I was the only one in my whole school who ever had acne... It was embarrassing. I had trouble looking at people when I talked to them, had a low self-esteem, and always envied the popular kids who were rich and had clear skin. I used to go to church, but seeing that I was the only one that had acne there too, I lost faith. I don't believe in god, if he were real why should we have to suffer this much with flawed skin? Creator of all good? Hm. Then who created acne to bring people to suicidal thoughts and low self-esteems? I don't feel like I deserve this, and I've prayed for many years, it's all fake.
I admit I still have issues with the way my skin looks, I still envy people with clear skin. Every where I go people have flawless skin... Everyday. I feel so alone here, and I'm hoping my scars and pimples will just go away... but one can dream, right? I've lived with this disease for over 7 years now, and I'm about to seek laser, derma-brasion, etc. treatment, because I am tired of all the false hope with antibiotics, and I'm tired of hoping my face will just get better from the regimen.
I'm sick of seeing all these people happy with their flawless skin that I deserve. They deserve my skin type. I hope someday they realize how hard it is to wake up with an ugly face every morning. Some days I just want to stay in bed and not do anything. I'm becoming anti-social from acne. My skin hurts, it's red, and it's ugly. I just want to claw at it sometimes just to make it more red. It hurts to smile... or even talk. My life between 11-now has sucked because of this hideous disease. I'm hoping when I go to college next spring that I fixed the issue...
I feel like no woman would want a man with flawed skin. I haven't had many girlfriends, and the ones I did have never complimented me or liked me as much as I did them... They cheated on me with a guy that had perfect skin. Oh, how the thought just angers me! I wish everyone had acne, or didn't so we wouldn't have to put up with this killer.
I'm done ventilating.
Well, I turn to this site because y'all understand. No therapist, friend, or relative could possibly understand the underlying emotions that come packaged with acne unless they've been through it themselves... And yes, I am the only one in my family with acne. I feel like an outcast. :/ I've never fit in with them either.
Well, I turn to this site because y'all understand. No therapist, friend, or relative could possibly understand the underlying emotions that come packaged with acne unless they've been through it themselves... And yes, I am the only one in my family with acne. I feel like an outcast. :/ I've never fit in with them either.
I feel ya man. My sister has flawless skin. All my cousins have perfect skin too. I saw your pictures that you posted about the regimen, and the last picture you posted when your skin is super dry...your skin looked good there bro. Your a good lookin dude.
Thanks for the boost of confidence. This community is my backbone against this struggle. I'm not normally this down, I just need to vent every once in awhile like many others. It helps get it off my mind, and gives me invaluable advice from people who face the same problem. I just worry that people see me as "different" because of my face... but then again there are creepers out there... And I don't think I'm that "different" lol.
Dillon, first of all you are so cute! Acne doesn't make you the person you are. I know how you feel though. I am soooo self-consious about my skin and wish it was perfect. I always asked myself why me? What did I do, to not have flawless skin like most people. I wish i could not wear makeup. I must say though my skin is looking alot better. I started the regimen about a month ago, and i only do it at night. Hang in there! Don't think about it too much, bc you will stress more about it. That would mean more acne. Good luck to you handsome. We are all here to help and listen, bc we all have this disease.
It's our genetics man they are to blame, I'm not really a religious man but after seeing passion of the Christ I realized if god were real he suffured way more than any acne suffurer I mean the man got crucified and shit. The devil if anybody brought diseases and perdition to the world. After reading the bible with my own eyes I realize if anybody understands our suffering it's him. He didn't fit in society and look what they did to him. Anyway I just find all theories interesting and a good way to pass the time I mean it's impossible to even imagine how big our universe actually is with our own brain, I find After reading the bible,Jesus, and extraterrestrials are all connected, there is some crazy shit in the bible really interesting and I think it needs to be takin a better look at and anaylized better than what churches and preist spit out of their mouths. Not tryin to upset anybody but everything is corrupted unfourtantly even religions and our churches. Maby I'm just crazy or a stupid conspiracy theorist because I don't drink everyday or hangout with friends at the mall all day or go clubin or listen to shit music instead.
The way I see it, we all have our own problems. We may look at a guy with perfectly clear skin and envy him, he on the other hand may be a little chubby and look at you and envy your slim physique for example. Yes acne fucking sucks but there are many people out there dealing with alot worse shit than we are, people without jobs, homes, food, people with terrible diseases like AIDS and Cancers, people who have just lost loved ones, so who are we to complain?
It really goes both ways. When my skin is clear I get a lot of attention from people, and sometimes it's overwhelming. I get compliments people saying I'm handsome, cute, etc. and I don't know how to take it. It can even be embarrassing since I'm usually reserved and shy. The attention is something I don't particularly like, even if it's good. I just don't like the idea of people scrutinizing my appearance and making judgments.
When I have spots on my face I literally feel like the ugliest person on earth and don't want anyone to see me. So you can see, clear face or spotty face, sometimes the problem is within and that's what you need to work on. A clear face won't magically fix the emotional issues that we have as acne sufferers.
Acne does suck and can take such a toll on the self esteem but having clear skin is not having it all. Say that to an overweight person, person with cancer, financially struggling person, person going through a nasty divorce, etc....we all have our own battles. Even if your skin was beautifully clear your life would still have problems - it's inevitable.
I felt compelled to post here because I (like many of you) have been suffering from acne for a long time. 13 years here. And I hate wearing makeup, I hate hiding behind my hair, and I hate that I have to worry constantly about my acne showing through. It's humiliating, and most people my age have beautiful clear skin. There have been many, many days that I've sat in the house in tears missing school and work because I couldn't bear the thought of being seen in public. I can't even talk to men because I'm so self-conscious about the way I look. So I've been single for a long darn time.
However. I had someone I loved very much dying in my house of a lethal form of cancer only a few months ago. The cancer was so bad that he couldn't enjoy more than a few minutes a day because the pain was unbearable. His body was failing right before our eyes and there was nothing we could do about it. After he was gone, I sat in my car on my way home from the gym and cried because how selfish of me to complain and hate myself and my life because of my acne. Not once did I EVER hear him complain. Yes acne sucks, but he would have given anything to have had acne and not cancer. Acne is beatable and it doesn't change the way our systems work the way that cancer does.
And though I still whine and feel upset about my acne (it's inevitable) I try to remind myself that my body allows me to do the things that I want to do. My body is healthy and can run, jump, and swim. I don't have to worry about chronic pain, I don't worry that today might be my last day on earth, and I can enjoy all of the people that I love. My relative will never swim in the ocean again, and as unfair as it may be, I will.
I know it's so hard to change the way you feel about your appearance, but maybe if you try to look as your body as an instrument, you will learn to appreciate it for what it is. I'm still working on this too.
I know how you feel, everyone at my school is has perfect skin, a perfect body, and even perfect clothes. Sometimes I'm around then and they say things like "my skin looks like crap today" or "look at this giant pimple, I'm so ugly" when you can't even see it. When I hear that, I wonder what they think of me, the nerdy girl with tons of acne and no close friends. I used to wish there was a place I could go where everyone else understood what I was going through, but this is the closest I've found.
Thank you all for your consideration and advice. I know it can seem selfish sometimes to rant on and on about your problems, but someone suggested that I just put them out there and get help. So I did, and now I realize things I would've never thought of. All the people that fight deadly diseases, wars, financial troubles... I hope the best for them. I try to be as much help in the world as I possibly can, and ranting about my acne just holds me back.
Just know this everyone, it's temporary. Most of it's hormonal, your body is changing. Sure it seems like it will never go away, but I'm not going to give up. Dan has provided us with a great gift, connecting us all together. I consider y'all my acne family, one that I wouldn't change for the world. I'm not alone, and every time I start to get upset about my skin, I think about here and how much support there is. So I just want to say "thank you" for all your replies and advice. It really means a lot, and it just shows that I'm not the only one anymore, that there's others who share the same problem with me, and that makes it all the better.
Take a look at my log if you want to see some results with the regimen: http://www.acne.org/messageboard/index.php/topic/318735-dillons-log/
I'm on my 7th week, and I take the results I'm getting for granted. Maybe the pain is all just emotional now... My confidence has boosted far more than it ever has since I've moved myself away from all the losers at my high school. Life does get better, and I'm doing my best to succeed in life: acne or not. Life is what you make it, so make it good. Now I'm just ranting on about stuff lol, just message me if you need help or want advice on a 1-to-1 basis, or just ask the forum. Thanks again, I couldn't do this without y'all.