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Anybody else NOT want to have kids because of acne?

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Title says it all, but my gf has been bringing it up a lot more (just discussing) and I just can't help but think I'll be passing on this nightmare to another human. Ugh... It is and has been a struggle for me to keep my confidence up, hang out with friends, etc everyday.

Just wondering if anyone else feels the same. I'm not in the boat of "hopefully, they won't struggle like I did." I'd just feel so guilty if I knowingly passed this curse on.

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I dont not want to have kids, but I'm bound determined to figure out a cure for mine before I pass this onto my kids (I dont have any yet, but likely will soon). I will NOT let them go through this hell, it has destroyed my self esteem. So I'll find a cure for mine and pass the info along to them.

Luckily my hubby doesn't have bad skin issues at all. Maybe they'll get his genes.

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Some things in life are more important than others. I know acne seems like this huge terrible thing, but really what matters in life is family and friends. Choosing not to have a family because you'd feel terrible passing acne on to your kids seems a bit... I don't know... Not exactly shallow but that's the best I can come up with. You can't miss out on life because of acne. That's just ridiculous.

And besides... By the time your kids are teens there will probably be far better acne treatments. :)

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I lol'd at this, simply because why would having acne, or having acne when you were a teen stop you from reproducing? I mean really hahahha just adopt a kid then.

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Lol. Good replies but I think I'll have acne for the rest of my life. I'm 27 and still getting it so that's why. Not being shallow but Greeneyes put it well, it destroyed my self-esteem and it still is. Dealing with acne only as a teen would be such a breeze. Adult acne is just pure hell.

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I like your attitude acneslayer. That made me feel a little better. By the way, you have such great hair in that avatar pic :)

I've never wanted kids of my own (has nothing to do with acne, just wanted to raise animals instead of kids, lol) I really like four legged creatures, especially my feisty cat. I worry because I'm 30 and have been struggling with acne since I was a teen, some of it cystic but not usually a ton at a time, the red marks start to add up though but they are slowly fading. I'm using topicals and I'm scared to go back on birth control or start spiro because I'm afraid my body will build a tolerance to the treatment or I'll have to go off it for health reasons and end up with it worse than it is now. Though it wasn't super horrible last time I went off birth control. I'm also afraid I'll run out of acne treatments before I hit menopause. I worry too much. I don't think reading depressed and negative posts on here is helping me lol. If I get too much of a flare up, I will end up going back go the hormonal treatments. I'm kind of trying to give it a little time to see if my body will adjust when my period finally comes back (it stopped 4 months ago, all hormone tests were normal). Anyway, It made me feel better to think that new treatments might exist as I age. Too bad I can't just go through menopause at 30 :-) then I wouldn't have to go through cramps or a menstrual cycle either!

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Lol. Good replies but I think I'll have acne for the rest of my life. I'm 27 and still getting it so that's why. Not being shallow but Greeneyes put it well, it destroyed my self-esteem and it still is. Dealing with acne only as a teen would be such a breeze. Adult acne is just pure hell.

No offense, but acne isn't the end of the world.

There are far worse problems to pass on to children. I, for example have suffered with clinical depression (that's where there's actually a chemical imbalance in your brain that causes it, being sad about acne is NOT the same thing) my entire life. And that runs in my family. My mom, grandmother, and aunts all suffer with it as well. Depression is a far more terrible thing to pass on to a child. As bad as acne is, be thankful you don't have a worse condition.

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Lol. Good replies but I think I'll have acne for the rest of my life. I'm 27 and still getting it so that's why. Not being shallow but Greeneyes put it well, it destroyed my self-esteem and it still is. Dealing with acne only as a teen would be such a breeze. Adult acne is just pure hell.

No offense, but acne isn't the end of the world.

There are far worse problems to pass on to children. I, for example have suffered with clinical depression (that's where there's actually a chemical imbalance in your brain that causes it, being sad about acne is NOT the same thing) my entire life. And that runs in my family. My mom, grandmother, and aunts all suffer with it as well. Depression is a far more terrible thing to pass on to a child. As bad as acne is, be thankful you don't have a worse condition.

No offense taken. Well aware of depression. Dad is bipolar. Just having a bad day. Lol. Hope I didn't piss you off too bad...

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You didn't piss me off. I'm just trying to cheer you up by getting you to look at it logically. I know I get super upset about my acne, and then I just look at it logically and I'm like "why the hell was I so upset over something so stupid?"

Just trying to help you feel better. :P

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I lol'd at this, simply because why would having acne, or having acne when you were a teen stop you from reproducing? I mean really hahahha just adopt a kid then.

Yeah I hear ya. Im 25. Adult acne is a completely different ball game.

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I lol'd at this, simply because why would having acne, or having acne when you were a teen stop you from reproducing? I mean really hahahha just adopt a kid then.

Yeah I hear ya. Im 25. Adult acne is a completely different ball game.

Whoops totally replied to the wrong post. Meant to reply to Facne

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I have a 6 year old son. When I see him I sometimes think about if he's going to suffer from acne. I pray to God he doesn't. But if he does, he'll have a least one parent that understands how acne effects a person physically and mentally. I read another post about what love is.....and for me it is that I would CHOOSE to have acne, just a long as my son didn't suffer. But I might add, I think I'm a better person because of acne.

Edited by Espinilla12

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It's not so much the acne, it's how you respond to it.

If I ever become a father, and my children developed acne in their early teens like I did, I'd make sure they gained all the knowledge they'd need to deal with it straight away and deal with it properly in order to end it as soon as possible.

Nearly 13 years and my acne's still going strong. I've allowed it to take over my life. My social skills, confidence and self esteem are totally shot, to the point where I'm not sure if it will happen for me anyway. But if it did, I would certainly wonder how things would pan out for them. I guess I would just do my best to make sure they make better choices than I have up to this point. :)

Edited by PaulH85

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I lol'd at this, simply because why would having acne, or having acne when you were a teen stop you from reproducing? I mean really hahahha just adopt a kid then.

Yeah I hear ya. Im 25. Adult acne is a completely different ball game.

Yeah, well my mom is 54 and still has acne. Big whoop. She doesn't let it run her life.

No offense, but get over it.

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I lol'd at this, simply because why would having acne, or having acne when you were a teen stop you from reproducing? I mean really hahahha just adopt a kid then.

Yeah I hear ya. Im 25. Adult acne is a completely different ball game.

Yeah, well my mom is 54 and still has acne. Big whoop. She doesn't let it run her life.

No offense, but get over it.

What is your problem? All I said was I plan on figuring out a solution to it before having kids. Oh and just because you say 'no offense' before and after you say something rude, doesn't make you polite ;)

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I'm super sorry. I guess I'm just exhausted from trying to get people to stop feeding off each other's negativity in this forum...to no avail.

I really don't mean to be rude. I'm just being realistic.

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I'm super sorry. I guess I'm just exhausted from trying to get people to stop feeding off each other's negativity in this forum...to no avail.

I really don't mean to be rude. I'm just being realistic.

Well I still dont see what's so negative about hoping to find a solution to something that often does destoy self esteem before your kids go through it. In fact, I find that rather positive. I think what people need here is support, but I guess we all see it different ways.

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Don't fall out over it folks, we're all bound to have different perspectives on these sorts of things. And I can see where AcneSlayer is coming from; I have read posts on here from people who have said outright that they do not want children in case they "pass it on", so to speak. I would guess this is the kind of mentality that AcneSlayer is referring to.

But of course, the spin that you put on that, GreenEyes33, whereby you would rather find a solution to a potential problem your children could go through before it happens to them as well, rather than just ruling out being a parent completely, that's cool.

I guess there's just a fine line on this board sometimes, between supporting people and wallowing in what they're saying. It's easy to get caught up in it all because we can all relate to each other and our battles. And maybe, because we're talking about it online, it's not always easy to see where people are coming from which means things are open to interpretation. But, however we word it, and even if we disagree from time to time, we're all aiming to reach the same goals aren't we.

:)

Edited by PaulH85

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I didn't mean the part about finding a solution was negative...I meant the whole mentality that people on the emo board seem to have that they can't live a normal life just because they have acne. I realize acne is self-esteem killer, but still.

If you had some other terrible disease that was like life-threatening then you would have a totally different outlook. The acne would seem so insignificant. You people just need to realize that yes, acne sucks, but you seriously just need to stop feeling sorry for yourselves and just live your life.

If your acne ever stops you from going out, having children, talking to people or stops you from doing anything pretty much, then you have a potentially serious problem mentally--not just acne.

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It's just acne...

I am glad I was birthed, even if I was destined to have acne. Because I will get through it. I definitely want kids! Children are beautiful, and fascinating, what you would miss out to have children and to teach them, and to shift the focus of priority on them. Acne will seem so minor compared to the good things in life, like a family and spending time together. And having that satisfaction of being a good father and husband.

My child could come out crippled, and I would deal with it. You never know what defects your child will have until they come out and make their first cry into the world. Everything is gamble, and that's life. I would love my child unconditionally no matter how they came out. I was destined to be a mother, even if it means giving him or her a few spots.

P.S- I mean most women don't even know they have an STD and they unknowingly pass it on to their children, who is then born with HIV. I think acne would be much easier to deal with, plus I will have all this knowledge to pass onto my child. You have nothing to worry about.

;) Do me a favor, tomorrow in the morning, when you wake up smile, because you were given life.

Edited by Melie87

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It's just acne...

I am glad I was birthed, even if I was destined to have acne. Because I will get through it. I definitely want kids! Children are beautiful, and fascinating, what you would miss out to have children and to teach them, and to shift the focus of priority on them. Acne will seem so minor compared to the good things in life, like a family and spending time together. And having that satisfaction of being a good father and husband.

My child could come out crippled, and I would deal with it. You never know what defects your child will have until they come out and make their first cry into the world. Everything is gamble, and that's life. I would love my child unconditionally no matter how they came out. I was destined to be a mother, even if it means giving him or her a few spots.

P.S- I mean most women don't even know they have an STD and they unknowingly pass it on to their children, who is then born with HIV. I think acne would be much easier to deal with, plus I will have all this knowledge to pass onto my child. You have nothing to worry about.

;) Do me a favor, tomorrow in the morning, when you wake up smile, because you were given life.

THANK YOU! See guys? She gets it. It's JUST acne.

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Sure it's just acne...

Until you've got deep scars all over your face, and you're still breaking out as an adult after suffering for more than a decade.

Sure, it's no big deal. Rainbows and sunshine everyday.

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Acne has made me so depressed I have wanted to die. Its not really the acne that you can judge its how a person feels about it. Everyone is different. And let me tell you, for some, its a desperate and devastating situation.

On the children thing, I have totally thought about how it would be for my kids to inherit my acne and its something that would be so horrible I just wouldnt want to do that to someone.

I have already decided never to have children, acne is just part of the reason.

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If you've felt like killing yourself over acne, then you might very well have a deeper problem, like a mood disorder.

If you're ever feeling suicidal, please get help.

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