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first off i hope that people who read this have an open mind and arent quick to judge or be turned off because religion is a subject that is very controversial. however this is a summary of MY journey with the horrible disease called ACNE!!

im in my early 20's and had never had acne before 2007. not to be conceited but i never had a problem when it came to guys, i was considered very pretty. i would get the occasional HUGE one pimple before my period but nothing too serious, so when i got acne it was much unexpected.

i always had a religious background, not too into it though. i still did young adult stuff and was kind of caught up in my looks and would often put myself above others because of it. i tried to be as good of a christian as i felt i needed to be but i didnt really have a REAL relationship with God…that was until ACNE!

i started to get pimples about 2 years ago, they werent that bad in the beginning compared to the end but initially, me being into my looks, was very concerned and went straight to the dermatologist. not realizing my acne was probably stress induced (i left home, started college!) he put me on a topical- retin-a and some antibiotics-doxy. well each month after going back to him it just seemed to get worse! he would increase my dose, change the drug, give me new topical. i tried everything!!!! doxy, mino, clindo, retin a, yaz, erythro, peni (these are all abbreviated but u know them!) i tried pro active, murad, aspirin mask, lemon, green tea mask, high frequency, benzo., wearing no makeup (yikes!)... the list goes on! after about a year of trying everything i decided there was one thing i had not yet put my trust in. GOD.

now during these 2 years of acne i went through all the same things everyone goes through emotional wise. at first the little acne i had was hard to deal with but i was able to cover it with makeup. but as the months went on my acne got soooo much worse! i had multiple cysts on my cheeks, forehead, and chin. and they hurt and were red and huge! plus from all the meds my skin was also peeling, so make up made it look worse! now remember i had never had this problem before, remember i was the good looking girl that all the guys liked. so this was a very humbling experience! i felt so ugly! i didnt want anyone to see me! i was glad i moved away from my family and friends so they wouldnt have to see me and see this change from the nice clear face to a disaster. i was ashamed, humiliated, angry, jealous, DEPRESSED! i would skip all social events and would cry every time i looked in the mirror. i wanted to die.

during this process of excluding myself from the world, from my friends, family and anyone i knew, i had alot of time to myself. yes i was lonely but everyone i talked to didnt understand! they really didnt!! and nothing they said helped but pissed me off cause they didnt understand cause they had CLEAR FACES!! so i began to talk to God. yes they were angry talks about how i didnt understand why he let this happen to me! and what could i have done to deserve this! why me, why me talks. and even talks of why "so and so" doesnt have acne but i (the christian) do! then the pleas of how i would become a better person if he just cleared it and how i would never judge anyone again and how i just wanted my face to go back to normal and i promised i wouldnt be conceited and take advantage of his blessing to me.

along with the talks to him ( cause he was my only friend) i began to read the bible and listen to sermons to try and become even closer to him. to understand a little about him and maybe why he could let this happen to me. through reading his word i began to understand a little about God. his love for us, his ultimate will for us and most importantly his LOVE for us. this brought me comfort and a sense of relief. that no matter what i look like on the outside the only person who matters loves me regardless of what i look like and like a father he wants to help me and be there for me (you included) in our time of difficulties but ultimately all the time! I felt like I had never felt about him before. I was building a true relationship with him. I was a better person in the inside then I had ever been. An understanding of what is really important in life and what really makes a person beautiful was obvious to me now.

At this point it had almost been a year since my acne started and it had only got worse. I decided to get off all the medicines for acne and instead of hoping and trusting in medicines and doctors, who only look at my face for 5 minutes before prescribing me a new med, I would put my trust in the Lord. I mean what else was really left if you think about it. HE made the doctors and the ingredients in the products basically, so might as well trust in The Creator of it all. And no lie, within 2 months my face was almost back to normal. Of course I still have scars from the acne from the cysts but at least I don’t have mountains anymore I mean my face was bad every area was covered with something!! I believe my scars will go away just like my acne went away. It may not be over night but I know that the Lord loves me and wants me to be happy and will cure it like He cured me from my acne. I have faith in Him and continue to strengthen my relationship with Him.

Looking back on those horrible 2 years, I see the reason for God letting that happen. Like it says in the bible God wants a relationship with us. He loves us so much that he sent his only son for that reason. He wants us to love him and lean on him and realize how GREAT he is. He wants this relationship so bad that sometimes we have to go through tough situations to bring us close to him. That puts things into perspective for us. That HUMBLES us.

I was not on the right path before God got my attention. My looks were everything to me. I thought I was better than people because of it and I would judge because I thought I had that right. Don’t get me wrong I was always very nice to everyone and someone who knows me wouldn’t expect me to say I felt this way about myself but inside I was vain. I was very into this world and my relationship with God wasn’t that much of a priority, he kind of went to the back burner a lot. This was his way to bring me close to him; to show me what he is like and to learn about him. It was to build our relationship and for me to depend on him and value him because that’s what matters most in this life. When I had no one and no value in my life he showed me that all I needed was him/ to lean on him and he would help me more than anyone else. And my journey was proof of how great his love is.

This horrible experience was a blessing in disguise because I now know the love of God and it is the most beautiful and comforting feeling. That no matter what I go through I can trust in him to make everything ok because he loves me and you!

If you believe in him give him a chance. I know this is tough to go through but if you believe he can show you his love too. It might not be right away but do you part in getting to know him and learn about him and build your relationship and the wait will be worth it and it won’t be as bad as if you do it alone, he’ll comfort you. Can you think of a reason for God to let you go through this? Do you need to get closer to him?

**Im not saying this is the cure for everything, having a relationship with him! But tough times are meant for us to depend on him. Your journey might be for a different reason but I know acne is horrible and very depressing and no matter what he can help you get through this.

If you don’t believe in God, he will try other ways to get through to you. This isn’t the last because he’ll NEVER give up on you, he loves you too much. But hey if nothing else works and you’ve been trusting in a pill to work why not trust in this God which is so much more of a topic in this world then Accutane, he must be something special.

God Bless!

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