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Hi guys, i haven't been able to shake this sad feeling since I woke up. I even went to run and ate well and I still feel sad. Usually those things help. my b/f cheated on me with some girl and we are patching things up, but i haven't been able to shake the sadness and devastation. Also, i am on accutane and I got my first breakout since on it. So i feel ugly, lonely, and lied to. I just can't seem to get out of this rut. I don't think it is the accutane making me feel this way, or they bc, but maybe it is. This was such a stressful week. I cried everyday, slept 3 hours most nights. The girl he cheated on me with was mad he still wants me so she was stalking me with phone calls and emails. This drama has really worn me out. Please don't tell me to break up with him cuz I love him. I he said he is falling in love with me and needed to wake up. I broke up with him and he convinced me back. The cyst really depresses me to. I look in the mirror and hate myself. I don't know what is going on with me. i havne't felt this bad in a long time. help.

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If he cheated on you already, what makes you think he won't do it again. I'm sorry, I know that's not what you wanted to hear.

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i guess because people change and grow. he is going to go to counseling. he never had a serious g/f in 3 years so he is used to just doing what he wants. he said he wants to be a better man. i guess i need comfort. i don't want to be convinced to not be with him, but thanks for the response and caring.

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Guest Sebastian_K

I think its time for high self esteem.

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i guess because people change and grow. he is going to go to counseling. he never had a serious g/f in 3 years so he is used to just doing what he wants. he said he wants to be a better man. i guess i need comfort. i don't want to be convinced to not be with him, but thanks for the response and caring.

People don't typically change or grow when they hurt others, only when they are actually hurt. If the guy needs counseling to figure out why he shouldn't cheat on you, he sounds like a loser. You're way too fine in your picture to put up with that type of shit, trash him.

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well he is going to counseling to heal compulsive lying and not being able to open to someone fully. he cheated because he disconnects himself from his emotion. guys, please, i don't want to stick up for him. i just need support. thanks.

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well he is going to counseling to heal compulsive lying and not being able to open to someone fully. he cheated because he disconnects himself from his emotion. guys, please, i don't want to stick up for him. i just need support. thanks.

Sorry I didn't mean to be insensitive but for me I can't get out of that mindframe.

Can't u block her e-mails? Since he is doing counseling, maybe u can do the same; I mean write out how you're feeling. Maybe tell him how everything makes you feel. Good luck, hope u feel better

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the plot thickens, she stop calling me because he told her i left him to get her to chill..so now she left me alone. it gets worse, she is pregnant. she needs to get rid of the baby and he has to stay in touch with her until next week when she has her appt. she called at 5:30 in the morning to talk to him. it is so intrusive and kind of a mess.

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the plot thickens, she stop calling me because he told her i left him to get her to chill..so now she left me alone. it gets worse, she is pregnant. she needs to get rid of the baby and he has to stay in touch with her until next week when she has her appt. she called at 5:30 in the morning to talk to him. it is so intrusive and kind of a mess.

She sounds completely sane... or what's that word that means the opposite?

She sounds possessive and is probably lying about the fetus dumpling to get his attention. Tell him if she needs a shoulder to cry on she can go find a friend or do crack.

You sound like you need some endorphins. Chocolate ice cream or kickboxing.

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Hi Time4HighSelfEsteem,

I usually don't post in "emotional effects" but your post made me sad for you. :cry:

Your breakout will get better!! Don't worry about that.

And as far as your boyfriend goes, if he is trying that is an excellent sign!! I think you need to spend some time with him...right now! Invite him over, call him, he makes you feel good right? He loves you and makes you feel better about yourself right? Why are you not with him right now? But don't talk about the other chick...there's not much to do about that right now. He's with you, not her!!

So what I say is...go get him... I don't know if you 2 are physical with eachother or whatnot but THAT always makes things better, right? :dance:

good luck to you, things will work out..

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yosup, haha! i do need some icecream haha. i seriously think she may be lying. because she told him 2 days later after they hooked up she was pregnant from a time 1 month and 1/2 a go. they cheated 2x's only. the first time she didnt know about me. the 2nd time, she found out about me, seduced him and then 2 days later said she was pregnant. i feel like maybe it was a plot to get me to break up with him. she is psycho. but if she really goes to the appt (he is going to) then we will know it is real. if she says for him not go, then we know she lied. i have to admit, one time another guy a while back had a g/f and i messed around with him. this may be my pay back. i will never do that to another woman again now that i know what it feels like. it is hell. the difference is i never would have tried to get him to leave the girl. she threatened to keep the baby so he would stay in her life. she is rotten. i feel so much anger toward her. even hatred. i don't know how i can hate, but i feel so angry i want to explode. talking about it is helping. i think i may be sad becuase i have suprresed the anger. i was trying to be an angel and just forgive everyone. but i am fucking pissed. how could she do this to me!? for some reason i am not pissed at him even though he did the deed also. i guess i don't want to be pissed at him because i understand his issues. i think i need to hit my bed with pillows and pretend i am kicking the shit out of her. it sounds horrible, but i am enraged.

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Guest Sebastian_K

Whaaat?! Shes pregnant with his kid.

Man. im a guy and that, and feel like i know who this guy is. I know that game... that sympathy game to get your girl back. Its an act. Some are very good actors and some girls are suckers. Dont be a sucker.

It'd be best if you leave him, coz youre going to get shitted on in the future.

You could easily do better.

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I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you're too good for him. Forget about him, if he really needs to cheat on you with another woman, he's just a born loser. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

You can get a better guy than that, c'mon, you've got us to talk too in the meantime. You arne't alone, ugly, but you can get a better guy. Don't worry, you'll find the right guy one day....:)

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Oh dear...please please please don't do the female thing that we ALL do (including me)..."he needs help and I'm going to help him and be supportive even though he makes me feel like shit". NOT cool. That time he was spending, having SEX with ANOTHER girl, why wasn't he spending that time with YOU? If you are THAT important and if he REALLY cares that much about you then where was he when you were alone? He was with someone else!

Okay, okay, he's going to get "help" for his problems...well, you (as tough and harsh as this sounds) don't have to be there for him. Let him figure it out on his own because you are just condoning his actions. He gets to screw up BIG time but he still gets you....??? Not right! Actions speak louder than words. He needs time, alone, to figure things out and decide where he stands with you and then he needs to apologize and apologize and apologize and NEVER stop apologizing until YOU are sure, without any doubt in your mind that he does NOTHING but make you feel good about yourself. If you cannot honestly say to yourself that he does make you feel good about yourself, after he's had more counseling, then you need to drop him. You NEED to, for your own good. It is so hard. It is SO SO hard to just let that go. We get so wrapped up in how we feel about them that we'd give anything to have them there with us and we aren't being fair to ourself. They need to care about us as much as we care about them. They need to treat us with the same respect we treat them and the same respect we deserve. You need to cut off ties with him and tell him he can come back when he's got his head screwed on right, which you CAN'T wait around for. You have got to move on and when he comes back, that's when you deal with it. You have to put yourself back together after all of this and THEN you can be there for him.

I am sort of going through the same thing...not to quite that extreme, but sort of. You just have to break ties...if they want to come back, they will, but when they are committed to YOU and when YOU are okay. It hurts like hell and you feel like shit and you have all of these questions running through your head that you can't answer and anything he says won't be good enough.

You have to get past it first. You have to take care of yourself FIRST.

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well being a guy i can tell for 99% that once he cheated he's not really regreting it as he says and he dosen't feel he needs any help. For 99% i can say he's fuked up, but...

Cheer up, cuz for 100% i'm sure u are the lucky one and your bf is in the remaining 1% :)

But don't let him meet that bitch ever again!!

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I wonder what he thinks of you when you decide to take him back after a BIG no-no. He probably told u it was an accident. He accidentally was in a room , with a stranger who just accidentally happened to be in that same room, who also happened to be accidentally naked. Have some respect for yourself. When u take him back like that u are telling him that its okay to stick it to u again. Let him run off with his bitch. After what he did do u think u can ever trust him 100%. After what he did ur trust in him surely must have dropped to 80% which means that now u can only love him 80%, because in order to love him 100% u need to be able to trust hime 100% of the time. U wanna keep living ur life having to always look over ur shoulder. He's probably with her right now, u never know. So why are u gonna keep wasting ur time.

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Uh...look. Cheating is a lack of self control. I don't see why you people play these games. If you cheated on your boyfriend/girlfriend just tell them for gods sakes. Eventually you are going to slip up and the truth will come and you end up hurting the person so much more.

But.. if your boyfriend cheated on you, I know it's hard but you really need to be firm. Losing the one you love is nothing short of a tragedy, but having him go behind your back, lie to you and betray you is almost as bad.If I was on your shoes, I would erase him from my life no matter how hard it was and move on. ..

Yes, I know this is not what you want to hear, but you are better then that. Don't you think there is somebody out there that will be faithful to you and not go behind your back? I mean I suppose I could understand if your boyfriend was drunk, or something but other then that and rape there is no excuse for cheating. Atleast be firm, tell him to do this and this or he can go fuck himself. If you just forgive and forget people will take advantage of that. People need to know there is a line- a breaking point and if you cross that there is no going back. What's the breaking point in your relationship, having him cheat twice maybe?

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