With my finals due in a few days, I let the stress get to me and I attacked what I assume was cystic acne since I got nowhere with it. As the story usually goes, I managed to turn a small cyst, into a golf ball next to my lip. The cyst became huge, my cheek swelled up and so did the lymph node under my jaw which of course means it's infected. Once I realized the damage I'd done I finally came to my senses and started the frantic regime of every home remedy on the internet in hopes either one of them or all of them combined will somehow perform the miracle of making this sucker disappear beforework in the morning.

I am prescribed Adderall XR for ADD, if i stop taking it everything productive in my life falls apart, I've already tried. I know that the Adderall makes this an uphill battle.Ive always picked at scabs and tried to pop zits but it wasn't until I was 23 that it got totally out of control. I was an engineering student, my roommate was always gone, and my boyfriend at the time lived an hour away so we only saw each other on the weekends and we had a very unhealthy stressful relationship. When my stress levels were high I would end up picking at anything from a small zit to a large cyst obsessively, at times I'd even use a needle or the sharp point on my tweezers thinking if I just poked it to get it all out I'd be done and leave it alone. But of course I never left it alone. I'm normally a very outgoing and social person, I'd never struggled with anxiety, OCD, depression, etc. When I started picking I started to ruin my life. My skin was so bad I didn't want to leave the house, I skipped my classes and ended up failing them, I called out sick from work, I hid in my room to avoid seeing some of my best friends when they came over with my roommate, turned down invitations to parties and dinners, and even started avoiding eye contact with people I had to talk to. I was depressed and so far in my head that I had not only destroyed my skin I had also torn myself apart emotionally.

I am now 26, I work full time and take online classes to finish my degree. As is apparent by the start of this post, I have a lapse in judgement every now and then and give into the temptation, but overall I've learned ways to curb the issue.

If you've already done the damage, don't do anymore. Easier said than done I know, I know the lack of patience and desperation first hand. Unfortunately the reality is It's not going to heal overnight. I know no one wants to hear that but it's true, you can't cause that much damage and expect it to be back to normal smooth skin 12 hours later like some type of superhero. I've tried the Neosporin thing but as a female who doesn't have the courage to walk out into the world with a naked face and a gaping wound in the middle of it, Neosporin keeps the area too moist to cover up with makeup. What has been working best for me is soaking a cotton ball in warm water, then a little tea tree oil and using it as a warm compress for about 30 - 45 seconds. We have an Aloe plant in the back yard so immediately after the compress I squeeze the gel from the leaves onto a q-tip and apply it generously over the damaged area. The aloe gel dries pretty quick and continues to help heal. On days that I don't have to leave the house I keep applying more aloe gel throughout the day. Its still not the instant results we all look for but this has seemed to help me the most to reduce swelling and help heal quickly. Apple Cider Vinegar stings terrible and honey is too messy to sleep with overnight and often I find it seeps through the bandaid if I cover it for the night.

Obviously the hardest part is resisting the urge to squeeze, pick, peel scabs, and even just put my hands on the area. I've thought a lot about the times my skin has been healthy as well as the times I've destroyed it and what differences in my life, surroundings, and behavior there were. Doing this has helped me find techniques that are actually successful in resisting the urge to pick. Standing farther back from the mirror and avoiding mirrors all together is unrealistic and not effective for me. I found that when my skin is healthy, I'm usually around other people. My picking is at it's worst when I'm in the comfort of an empty house with no one to judge me. I also tend to scratch and pick at zits and scabs when my hands are empty and I am focusing on something. I do my best to not be alone and I know I can't live alone because it would enable me to pick. Im embarrassed to scratch and pick in front of friends and family so I do my best to be around them as much as possible. If I'm studying at home I wear some cheap winter gloves so that I can't cause any damage if I touch my face without thinking about it. I also try to keep my hands occupied. I have a fidget cube at my desk at work that has been amazing in distracting me and keeping my hands busy and away from my face. If I don't have the cube with me I try to find something else to keep in my hand like a retractible pen that I can click or twirl around.

I hope that this post is helpful, I've been reading this forum for years but never posted. It's been a breath of fresh air to know I'm not alone.