..HI heather!..ughhh the tane burn..im nervous about that, bc im pale and tend to get red as it is!! i see you have used bp, i've still been using my acanya bc my face isnt dry yet and im too nervous to stop it..my face looks good now and i dont want to suddenly stop..gonna try to wean myself off of it...has bp helped ? does it irritate your skin now that your almost 2 months done?...x.
..HI heather!..ughhh the tane burn..im nervous about that, bc im pale and tend to get red as it is!! i see you have used bp, i've still been using my acanya bc my face isnt dry yet and im too nervous to stop it..my face looks good now and i dont want to suddenly stop..gonna try to wean myself off of it...has bp helped ? does it irritate your skin now that your almost 2 months done?...x.
hey! yeah i don't think your meant to use pb while on accutane but i can't help myself! if i feel like a cyst is popping up i will put bp on the area, it does dry out your skin abit quicker than before but i feel the dryness goes away quicker also if i use moisturiser afterwards. accutane constantly renews the layers of skin so i guess thats why. hell im gunna use it, id rather have a dry patch than one of those monsters! x
Day 54.
Having a sort of "good-skin day" today, everythings healing apart from one active on my jawline but it's not sore and you can't see it unless I tilt my head 
Blackheads and pores are minimising themselves yet again which is a pleasant suprise! I won't hold my breath though, I guess they'll just come and go during the treatment! Apart from that there's not much else to report, apart from some small itchy spots I've been getting on random places of my body. They're like small insect bites and aren't there for long, weird! Also I went indoor wall climbing on Friday for the first time which I really went for because it was so much fun but OMG I was in pain the next day hahaha, will take it easy next time I go!
There's something else on my mind, which has pretty much been on my mind all the time for the last 2 and a half years, and is completely unrelated to this websites topic but I suppose it's better to vent your emotions somewhere rather than keeping them bottled up. ANYWAY, I'm really missing my dad today. He passed away suddenly over 2 years ago and he was the only person at that time that I could/would talk to about my skin. And he was so there for me, booking me docotrs/derm appointments, taking me to them, bringing me home new face wipes/wash because he thought it might help. I just miss him. So much. And I totally broke down when I was tidying up today. Don't worry this is not the accutane making me depressed or anything, this is an ongoing thing. Someone suggested to me before that I should keep a diary about my feelings due to losing my dad and I was about to update this log so thought why not post something on here. You never know, there might even be someone going through something similar to you.
I also think that a big part of the reason my acne got worse again in the last couple of years is due to the stress of losing my dad. For a while before he passed away I hadn't had any cysts but they came flooding back after he died.
I suppose it does feel kinda better just writing how you feel. Ahhh life is a very harsh journey sometimes!
That's really sad about your Dad. Mine passed away when I was little so I don't really remember him, but sometimes I have days where I think everything would be different (and better) if he were still round. It's a compound effect, I only seem to think about it when I'm already down. Youre right about life being really harsh sometimes.
On a lighter note, I ran out of foundation so I've just purchased some double wear! I completely guessed my shade as I did it online :/ so that could be an issue. But I'll try it out either today or tomorrow
That's really sad about your Dad. Mine passed away when I was little so I don't really remember him, but sometimes I have days where I think everything would be different (and better) if he were still round. It's a compound effect, I only seem to think about it when I'm already down. Youre right about life being really harsh sometimes.
On a lighter note, I ran out of foundation so I've just purchased some double wear! I completely guessed my shade as I did it online :/ so that could be an issue. But I'll try it out either today or tomorrow
Aaawk that's so unfair your dad passes away when you were young 
my dad was an awesome father and friend for the years that I had him so i should be grateful for the time I did have with him! And I am. Such a shame about your dad, I'm so sorry.
Oh yey double wear! Oh god now I feel nervous incase u don't like it hahaha! I'm sure you will yeah I hate that with foundations, I bought one that was faaar too dark for me, but I didn't realise how dark and wore it for weeks until my friend pointed it out to me LOL. I've got really pale skin but the lightest shade "bone" was too light! I'm the next one up but I can't remember what it's called. Aww I hope you like it, let me know how u get on
Day 56.
Grrr my chin has all of a sudden broken out today. I already had one spot on my chin but come home from work today and theres another 2 popping up! The one I had on my cheek is no longer "active" but it's still very much there. I'm going to Holland on Tuesday and was hoping not to have anymore breakouts, ach well, ye can't always get what ye waaaant. Derm appointment on Friday.
Day 56.
Grrr my chin has all of a sudden broken out today. I already had one spot on my chin but come home from work today and theres another 2 popping up! The one I had on my cheek is no longer "active" but it's still very much there. I'm going to Holland on Tuesday and was hoping not to have anymore breakouts, ach well, ye can't always get what ye waaaant. Derm appointment on Friday.
hi heather! sorry to hear abt your new spots ..i'm going through my initial breakout now, and it sucksss!..have 2 gross things on my chin and i never breakout there!! how cool you're going to holland! i always have wanted to go there! you still have a little time for skin to improve..i shall keep my fingers crossed for you! x
Day 56.
Grrr my chin has all of a sudden broken out today. I already had one spot on my chin but come home from work today and theres another 2 popping up! The one I had on my cheek is no longer "active" but it's still very much there. I'm going to Holland on Tuesday and was hoping not to have anymore breakouts, ach well, ye can't always get what ye waaaant. Derm appointment on Friday.
hi heather! sorry to hear abt your new spots
..i'm going through my initial breakout now, and it sucksss!..have 2 gross things on my chin and i never breakout there!! how cool you're going to holland! i always have wanted to go there! you still have a little time for skin to improve..i shall keep my fingers crossed for you! x
Hey! thanks it could be alot worse but I just didn't want the stress off it, it's the worst thing when your away! Aaww hunni hand in there, what helped me at first with the breakouts was trying to adjust my perception of the breakouts. you know they're going to happen and it is the drug getting rid of the crap underneath the skin that has been causing the constant cycle of breakouts. it's better to get them all out at once than living your life with them popping up indefinately. remember that this needs to happen in order to make it better, fuck anyone who stares or mkaes rude comments, your gunna have better skin than them in 5 months! remember that its not your fault that your skin is like this. remember that your skin is not who you are. remember that in five months time you will be SO MUCH MORE CONFIDENT! remember that this will be worth it in the long run. and most importantly remember that you are a great person!
i should become an agony aunt hahaha! yeah holland is really cool, ive been twice before but literally for only the day each time (it only takes an hour to fly to amsterdam from scotland). i love how easy going the place is! im going next tuesday for 4 nights with my younger sister, shes 16 and shes been training to become a pilot for the last couple of years and she was recently invited to come to a flying skills test with flybe! so proud of her. so we're staying in a place called Teuge for 2 nights where the airport is tht she will be training at. then im taking her to amsterdam for 2 nights 
shes never been so it should be quite funny taking her to the red light district but not actually telling her thats where were going hahaha! going to go to the dungeons n madame tussauds too so should be good!
ooh, how was your trip to st louis btw? did u have a good time? x
Heather, hope you have a great trip! And that you see lots of healing
I'm not far behind you (day 50) and still seeing plenty of breakouts and also have stuff that is not active but "very much still there" like you said. And the red marks...ACK!
Aaww thankyou yeah I was at my derm appointment today, it was a different woman than I usually see, and she seemed quite suprised that my skin hadn't gotten better. If she'd asked me that 5 days ago it would have been a yes but unfortunately I've been breaking out since then. I'm not too fussed about it, just trying to ignore it cause I know it will be away everntually. Just a shame it couldn;t stay away for my wee break next week! Aaaww I hate it when they take ages to go away! I actually ordered some kelo-cote online a few days ago for my scars and red marks...hope it works!
Day 58.
Had my derm appointment today, was a different woman this time but she was really nice. Not much to update on but I took part in an acne research thingymajig where I gave extra blood so that tests can be done to compare acne sufferer's DNA with non-acne sufferers DNA. Apparently not alot of people have agreed to help which is a shame really.
Oh dear, think I'm experiencing my actual IB now. 2 new actives popped up on my face in the last few hours and the ones on my chin are quite sore. boooo WHY did i need to get this just days before i go away
hi heather! well u know i completely understand...lol..doesnt it suck??? its like the bad acne gods know exactly when to strike ...but i know with your great positive attitude you wont let it interfere with your great trip! we just gotta keep telling ourselves in a few months we wont have to put up with this..we gotta keep our eye on the prize!! cant believe not many people take part of the research..jeez i'd give a gallon of blood if in someway they could figure out anything about this disease!
Just catching up on your log. Hope your trip goes well! Have fun! I'm sorry to hear about your dad and how this process is bringing up grief again. I guess we always have grief but it ebbs and flows. Anyway, you have already experienced how much the nature of breakouts change on Accutane - cysts coming to heads and shrinking soonish - that NEVER used to happen pre-Accutane, so you know that this too shall pass, your skin will heal and it will all have been worth it. Hang in there!
I relate to the back pain only when lying down. Very weird but can deal. The red face is just so strange. I'm wicked pale and to have my face look like a perpetual sunburn is hard to get used to. I'm not wearing as much makeup as I used to and I like the feeling of my skin "breathing" but I appreciate your makeup recommendations. Take care.
Oh dear, think I'm experiencing my actual IB now. 2 new actives popped up on my face in the last few hours and the ones on my chin are quite sore. boooo WHY did i need to get this just days before i go away
hi heather! well u know i completely understand...lol..doesnt it suck??? its like the bad acne gods know exactly when to strike
Hey! yep! i think accutane KNOWS when we're going away!! thankyou so much for the support, i really do love this forum. think i'd be a nervous wreck if it wasn't for the people on this forum, i'd feel so alone. i won't let this breakout get to me! i'm determined!
i know, i was really shocked when the nurse told me she was finidng it difficult to get doners. and it's only people that have come in for a blood test anyway that she had been asking. she was very pleased when i agreed, i don;t think she had realised i'd said yes at first because she kept trying to convince me lol.
how are you getting on?
Just catching up on your log. Hope your trip goes well! Have fun! I'm sorry to hear about your dad and how this process is bringing up grief again. I guess we always have grief but it ebbs and flows. Anyway, you have already experienced how much the nature of breakouts change on Accutane - cysts coming to heads and shrinking soonish - that NEVER used to happen pre-Accutane, so you know that this too shall pass, your skin will heal and it will all have been worth it. Hang in there!
I relate to the back pain only when lying down. Very weird but can deal. The red face is just so strange. I'm wicked pale and to have my face look like a perpetual sunburn is hard to get used to. I'm not wearing as much makeup as I used to and I like the feeling of my skin "breathing" but I appreciate your makeup recommendations. Take care.
hey summer thanks! i'm really looking forward to it yeah the breakouts do come and go but i'm definately experiencing the worst one at the moment, trying not to let it get to me and so far so good i'm really pale too! like really pale! i wish i had your strenght to go out with little make-up on, i'm just not there yet but hopefully i will be sometime soon. i just read your log and i'm so glad your happy that you continued with accutane! not too long now!!
Day 59.
I couldn't resist putting a bit of BP on my active last night, I'm a bad girl I know! Couldn't help myself 
. Woke up today and washed my face to find that on of my old spots has pretty much flattened out but another has popped up on my bloody chin! They love the chin! I dunno what it is they just love it. My actual skin in general is looking quite good, then theres the 7-8ish spots ruining this. God damn you.
Anyway I made a decidsion today, that might be a tad controversial to some but I'm doing it. I've got a course of penecillin that I'm going to take. I was prescribed this a few weeks ago for a suspected throat infection but it was a false alarm. I was on penecillin a couple of years ago for tonsilitus and it totally cleared my skin. Some people are actually prescribed it as a short term fix so i'm going to take it and hope the breakout clears a bit. My doctor said penecillin is fine with accutane before anyone gets on at me about mixing the 2 drugs!
If I wasn't going away on Tuesday I wouldn't care about the breakout but I just hate when your in a hotel room, out of your comfort zone and the lighting and everything is different in the bathroom n makes you look like crap!
I just really hope that on my goal of 17th September (my first day of uni) I'm not so self conscious...
Hey, it's your skin, your body, your journey so no judgement about the choices you make. If it helps, great! I am hoping you meet your goal on the 17th too! I do know what you mean about being out of the comfort zone and new lighting to contend with, but you can do it! And I do believe you will be able to wean yourself off some makeup as you progress on this journey but I'll admit, some days it is still hard and I feel scared and nervous without my "shield" and other days, I say screw it, and load up.
Hey, it's your skin, your body, your journey so no judgement about the choices you make. If it helps, great! I am hoping you meet your goal on the 17th too! I do know what you mean about being out of the comfort zone and new lighting to contend with, but you can do it! And I do believe you will be able to wean yourself off some makeup as you progress on this journey but I'll admit, some days it is still hard and I feel scared and nervous without my "shield" and other days, I say screw it, and load up.
Thanks for not being judgemental summer I was going to ask my derm yesterday if she could prescribe me prednisone (not sure how to spell it, or pronounce it for that matter lol!) but I chickened out because it was a different woman than I had seen the last 2 times. Yeah that's the thing, some days are just better than others! I actually did go out ONCE with just a bit of powder on my face to take my dog a walk. It was quite dark though and I had my hood up hahaha, but it did feel good not spending 20 minutes doing my face just to go out for 20 minutes! I think once this breakout is over I will start to gradually reduce the amount of make-up I use. You've inspired me And hey it will be less expensive too haha!
Oki doki I took the pics, and it actually wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, although the lighting isn't too great I suppose, so you can't see it the exact way it is.
This is my worst side, the left side where the worst scarring is. I have 3 actives there at the moment (one huge mofo on my chin and 2 on my cheek, coupled together) but just to the side of them is where my worst scarring is. You can't really make it out properly but theres pretty much every type of scar there, not just redness.
This is the right side. You can kinda see the ice pick scarring I have on my cheek. There is some discolouration aroung the area from where I had cysts but you can't really see this. If you imagine that the normal level of my skin is level 10, the top level, well the scarred patch is like level 7. Like the whole are is indented.
This is the red mark I have left from the cyst between my eyes. It is getting better.
And this is my face!
This me earlier today with just my Estee Lauder foundation on. And my awesome mascara Ohhh the wonders of make-up!!
Oh and ignore the pj's and messy hair, I've been having a lazy day today 
Well there you have it. My skin is looking really nice I think apart from the spots obviously. Hope these heal a bit before Tuesday!
Hi Heather! You're adorable, and jeez you have the greatest eyelashes! your skin looks really good, and i dont think your scars look bad at all! By the time you finish accutane i think your skin will pretty much look flawless..I wish i could do a good job with face make up, but i dont ..always looks like im trying to cover something up, which i am, lol..but wow your makeup looks great!!
Hi Heather! You're adorable, and jeez you have the greatest eyelashes! your skin looks really good, and i dont think your scars look bad at all! By the time you finish accutane i think your skin will pretty much look flawless..I wish i could do a good job with face make up, but i dont
Heyyy aww thankyou haha, yeah my eyelashes are my favourite feature lol. The scars don't look as bad as they are in the pics, you can only really see the redness but theres proper rolling scars and boxcar things in there, but I'm starting to feel abit better about them ahh the make-up thing really is just yeeears of trial and error1 and i mean years lol. i think this is the first time ive actually been happy with my make-up routine. what make-up do you use if u dont mind me asking? x
Had my derm appointment today, was a different woman this time but she was really nice. Not much to update on but I took part in an acne research thingymajig where I gave extra blood so that tests can be done to compare acne sufferer's DNA with non-acne sufferers DNA. Apparently not alot of people have agreed to help which is a shame really.
A woman spoke to me about this research! I said I would help last time but she didnt ask me for anything just said we would 'talk again' :/ So I guess I will have to do blood tests for it next time. They don't seem to be bothering to blood test me themselves anymore.
I'm not sure how I feel about the double wear! I've heard so any good things from everyone about it, but I never like new foundation at first. I'm using bone, and it still looks too dark on me! I seriously can't catch a break, I'm sure I'm not white, but maybe I just am. I wore it shopping the other day though and was really pleased with the wear. I also dont have a concealer that matches it, so just used a few more layers of foundation over the spots and it did pretty well. It matches my hands exactly shade wise though, so I could just be being funny about it.
I hope you have fun away! Your skin looks really good in the photos so I think you should be clear soon and the accutane will help those scars too I think, it seems to be with mine anyway.
Had my derm appointment today, was a different woman this time but she was really nice. Not much to update on but I took part in an acne research thingymajig where I gave extra blood so that tests can be done to compare acne sufferer's DNA with non-acne sufferers DNA. Apparently not alot of people have agreed to help which is a shame really.
A woman spoke to me about this research! I said I would help last time but she didnt ask me for anything just said we would 'talk again' :/ So I guess I will have to do blood tests for it next time. They don't seem to be bothering to blood test me themselves anymore.
I'm not sure how I feel about the double wear! I've heard so any good things from everyone about it, but I never like new foundation at first. I'm using bone, and it still looks too dark on me! I seriously can't catch a break, I'm sure I'm not white, but maybe I just am. I wore it shopping the other day though and was really pleased with the wear. I also dont have a concealer that matches it, so just used a few more layers of foundation over the spots and it did pretty well. It matches my hands exactly shade wise though, so I could just be being funny about it.
I hope you have fun away! Your skin looks really good in the photos so I think you should be clear soon
Aaaww thats good your gunna take part in the research The more the better!
That's strange that the bone is too dark for you, I have the palest skin ever and it was too light for me! I was the same with the double wear at first, wasn't too sure but when I put on the foundation I used to wear I noticed the difference and wiped it off n put the double wear back on. Try lightly brushing some lighter powder (if you have some) over the top of it, that should help It's the best ive found for coverage and staying put all day.
Ohhh is it really helping with the scars? I thought that my scars had flattened out a bit but didn't think much of it. Theres times when I think my scars are fading and then only for it to be in vain The spots I have had since going on accutane do seem to heal alot quicker than they used to. So thats a plus
Hi, Just read you're log, Im hopefully planning to do this!!! Keep me updated
Hi I would definately do it if your skin is bothering you! I've been on accutane just over 2 months and I'm being honest when I say the side effects havn't been bad at all! A little back pain when I lie down and dryness on the face. I'm so excited to have clear skinnnn How come your not starting til the 10th of september?