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I am a 41-year-old man with bad acne scarring.
I thought I had accepted my scars.But around 2 months agomy scars began to causeme great distress and anguish. I don't know what triggered it (I probably do;I'm just not ready to accept it), but it was the most emotional/psychological pain I've had in a long time.
"My life is over."
"I will no longer be happy."
"I might as well die now."
Thus, beginning 2 months ago, I've had many sleepless nights and unproductive days of just scouring the internetfor that holy grail of acne scarring remedies. For almost 2 weeks now, I haven't read the news because I have been reading the discussions here.
Tonight,a day after a treatment package thatincluded TCA cross, subcision, microneedling with PRP and Red Light (the dermatologist only subcised several scars and wasn't thorough with the TCA cross), "a dam broke". I began to tear up and realized a few things.
1. Physical beauty means nothing.
When I was a senior in high school, the (consensus) prettiest girl in the entire school became my girlfriend. It didn't make my life enviable--she was mostly a pain in the ass. In hindsight, I would have been happier with someone less attractive but smarter and kinder--or with my female bestfriend.
2. The gifts/attributes we are born with can only get us so far.
A. Looks
Since I was a kid, I had been hearing people say that I was good-looking, directly to me or to other people, which I just overhear (I guessbone structure- and features-wiseI'm better-than-average-looking in my country's standard of beauty).Even when I was breaking out in high school and college. Even when I had scars in my 20s. (Now that I'm older and my scars look worse,only my wife and family say that I'm good-looking.)
Did my looks make my social life great? Not really. I was an introvert--brooding, shy, weird and awkward.
B. Talent
I got good grades without much effort. I got good jobs in good companies even if my educational background was in a different field. But I didn't really climb the corporate ladder much because I wasn't willing to do the overtime and really develop my skills.
3. It is time for me to be a better person. (Related to 2)
I'm not a bad person (I hope). I'm not criminal. I'm veryopen-minded.I don't judge people. But sometimes I can be impatient and selfish.
And most of my life, I've relied mostly on my looks and natural talent, which haven't taken me very far in life.
So, now, I think it's time for me to be a better person on the inside.Kinder. More generous. More patient. More loving.
To my wife. My family. My friends. Everyone I meet. But most especially to my wife.
3 hours ago, FumiyaTanaka said:I am a 41-year-old man with bad acne scarring.
I thought I had accepted my scars.But around 2 months agomy scars began to causeme great distress and anguish. I don't know what triggered it (I probably do;I'm just not ready to accept it), but it was the most emotional/psychological pain I've had in a long time.
"My life is over."
"I will no longer be happy."
"I might as well die now."
Thus, beginning 2 months ago, I've had many sleepless nights and unproductive days of just scouring the internetfor that holy grail of acne scarring remedies. For almost 2 weeks now, I haven't read the news because I have been reading the discussions here.
Tonight,a day after a treatment package thatincluded TCA cross, subcision, microneedling with PRP and Red Light (the dermatologist only subcised several scars and wasn't thorough with the TCA cross), "a dam broke". I began to tear up and realized a few things.
1. Physical beauty means nothing.
When I was a senior in high school, the (consensus) prettiest girl in the entire school became my girlfriend. It didn't make my life enviable--she was mostly a pain in the ass. In hindsight, I would have been happier with someone less attractive but smarter and kinder--or with my female bestfriend.
2. The gifts/attributes we are born with can only get us so far.
A. Looks
Since I was a kid, I had been hearing people say that I was good-looking, directly to me or to other people, which I just overhear (I guessbone structure- and features-wiseI'm better-than-average-looking in my country's standard of beauty).Even when I was breaking out in high school and college. Even when I had scars in my 20s. (Now that I'm older and my scars look worse,only my wife and family say that I'm good-looking.)
Did my looks make my social life great? Not really. I was an introvert--brooding, shy, weird and awkward.
B. Talent
I got good grades without much effort. I got good jobs in good companies even if my educational background was in a different field. But I didn't really climb the corporate ladder much because I wasn't willing to do the overtime and really develop my skills.
3. It is time for me to be a better person. (Related to 2)
I'm not a bad person (I hope). I'm not criminal. I'm veryopen-minded.I don't judge people. But sometimes I can be impatient and selfish.
And most of my life, I've relied mostly on my looks and natural talent, which haven't taken me very far in life.
So, now, I think it's time for me to be a better person. Kinder. More generous. More patient. More loving.
To my wife. My family. My friends. Everyone I meet. But most especially to my wife.
I love this. It is important to remember who we can be if we work on ourselves!
