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Hi everyone, I am 18 years old boy. I want your opinion and advices on how you went through your life with acne and especially after acne.
I get this terrible acne when I was 15 years old. Until then I was so easy-going always hanging out with my friends and so on. Well times changed I got severe nodular acne. I isolate my self from the world for almost 2 years. I just could stand people looking at my face. I also got acne on my shoulders, chest and back. I had to quit playing basketball. I basically had holes in my body and with every physicalcontact scabs fell off and I started beelding. I get accutan and I was taking it for over a year.
After all I accepted my life the way it was. When I look back I think I was never so depressed when I had acneas I am now. I completely changed, I though when my acne will disappear I could live the way I was before. But I was wrong. I am still that person deep down but it seems my life will never be the same. I can not leave this circle of comfort zone. I became prisoner of my mind. Everytime I try someting I get stuck in this high level ofanxiety where I feel like I am choking. I never had anyone to talk about this. I know no one would actually understand, because well, they can't. If you haven't gone through acne you don't understand. This emotional pain and question of how your life would look like if younever got acne. I Think we all somehow accept ourselves in the proces of clearing skin. Difficult time comes when we try to live like we did before. It's never the same. Physical pain is nothing compared to emotional.
So I want to hear your story , how you handle your life when you tried to start living again?
And sorry for my english, I am not native..
I can totally relate. You are not alone. I'm a 21-year-old girl. I've been struggling with acne since 13. All my friends, from middle school to college, had, or have perfect skin. I still don't understand why I am the one with all the blemish all over my face. I was bullied from middle school throughout high school because of my acne. Even my best friends made fun of my skin. I've posted a number of horror stories on this forum... the pain lingers until today.
I've been telling myself, acne does not define you. But you know how hard it is to actually believe in it. Everywhere you go people see your face, and most of them do not get to know your personality and intelligence. They judge and say hurtful things. They think that you don't wash your face and that you don't give a damn about your skin. Oh yesterday I went to a store with my mom. She was looking for a good sunscreen. A lady who worked at the store walked up to me and said, do you want a soap? It can treat your acne. I felt so humiliated and walked out immediately. My mom did not understand why I was so upset. She found it ridiculous and funny. I tried to explain, but there seemed to be a wall between us, and nothing I said could go through. I gave up in the end.
There's this girl in my neuroscience class. Tall, extremely smart, and beautiful. She has acne and she does not seem to care at all. She does not wear makeup, and she gives everyone a big, sincerely smile when she talks. I admire her intelligence and grace. To me she is much more stunning than those cake-faced drama queens with perfect skin. I wish I could be like her. I guess you can be beautiful with acne. That girl is. I'm sure we both can be. But it's difficult to lie to yourself, you know. Maybe others see you as a charismatic character, but that does not help at all if you don't believe that you are a charismatic person.
One trick that I've been using is to keep myself busy with work and stay away from the mirror. I constantly remind myself that I should smile at people. I mean...you can't run away from yourself no matter how bad you feel about yourself. The only sensible thing to do is to embrace your own flaws.
I hope someday we both can look at ourselves in the mirror and see beautiful, clear skin. If not, at least see ourselves smiling and think, damn I'm pretty fucking cool who cares about acne.
I think I was 10 times more confident before acne and now I have like zero confidence and after acutane I basicaly look the same, at least my face, of course my skin will never be as it was before but it is not bothering me. But my chest, back and shoulders are full of scars. I have scars even near my elbow. It is really embarrassing, especialy durign summer. My body actually doesn't even look bad but I can't even go to the beach.
I somehow can't wait to start a job and make enaugh money to go to dermatologist and try some chemical peeling or laser, but on the other hand, I know even If my skin would look exactly the same as before my confidence wouldn't change. I just hope I will live life as I would if acne never happend to me. My only goal right now is to feel happy and be confident about my self. Well, it is not that easy...