I've read so many posts on this forum. So many people said that they could not leave the house, that their boyfriends/girlfriends/husbands/wives had to do this and that for them and they felt pretty bad. Well guess what I'm in college I have to go out everyday for class, work, and I do not have a relationship. I am dealing with this mess alone.
I can't tell you guys how jealous I am every time I see someone with acne is holding hands with someone else. Not in a bad way. I wish them happiness, but I want that for myself, too.
How could I ever expect anyone to like me if I don't even like myself? Especially after I get a new breakout, I just hate my body so much that I wish I could swap it with someone with perfect skin.
I am an over-achiever in college. Friends told me to chill a bit because my resume already looked better than theirs ever would. But what could I do to chill? Absolutely nothing. I cannot chill, because my brain is the only thing that I do not hate about myself. I feel so ugly.
I prefer hanging out with professors more than with my peers because I have a feeling that they must be much more understanding and much less judgmental. I know that caring so much about my acne is detrimental, but I cannot help it. I see people with perfect skin everywhere everyday and that frustrates me so much. I am now on the regimen. It's my 6th week. My face was completely clear in week 4 but now it's a total mess again. I don't know whether or not it will get better. I don't have other solutions. This is the only way. My face hurts every single second for the BP I put on, and the pain reminds me of my ugly face and I have to use so much will power to concentrate on my work. I hate this feeling.