I wouldn't say I'm consumed by hatred, but I think acne and the negative reinforcement I received because of it definitely denied me the chance of a "normal" youth. My thought patterns just weren't the same as everyone else, which meant that my only hope at fitting in was to pretend that I fitted in. I found that very difficult and ultimately unfulfilling. I forced myself to socialise, but if you're forcing yourself its not really fun.

I lost that sense of childishnaivety and wonder too early, which I do feelbitter about and that often leads me to resent those people who held on to thatveil of ignorance that typifies being young.

The best way I can describe it is that when I was in my teens and early twenties I felt the same way I do now around young people, like I'm not one of them. Except that I'm supposed to feel like that now because I'm 31. I was old before my time.

Yes, but not toward people who had nothing to do with my suffering. Seeing people enjoy life doesn't bother me. I can honestly say, though, that I doubt I'll ever experience truehappiness again. It's just not who I am anymore.