No idea where to begin this so I'll jump right in. I'm not going to format because I just want this to poor out, please highlight with your mouse so you don't get frustrated if you actually read it. I am always a lurker and never post so here goes. Basically, I have been battling skin problems for the past 6 years. It has determined nearly every aspect of my life and caused me to develop anxiety, lonliness and bouts of depression although I usually am a happy guy. I've attempted suicide with pills and booze only to wake up the next morning crying. I've literally tried everything, and I mean everything from laser to sugar free diets and everything in between. Diet helps me the most but it's a vicious cycle you see, I am so lonely what's the point of eating healthy because no one is going to see me out since I have social anxiety and don't like doing what the mainstream kids do because my skin 95% of the time is not normal. My social anxiety is that bad I just binge eat and my skin gets worse and I get sad and continuously inspect my skin in the mirror which consumes my life. Even when my skin is ok I still have severe social anxiety and don't like being around people because no one understands how messed up I am because of my skin. I've dropped out of university twice due to my skin and social anxiety to return to living with my parents who are in a good financial position with their business so I just work for them. They are wonderful people but don't understand what it's like. They're your typical outdated belief type people. This makes me remember this chilling quote I heard which goes something like "the only thing worse than lonliness is having people who don't understand you", this really hit me. Objectively speaking, I'm not a bad looking guy, I'm athletic, well educated, artsy but my life is just dictated by the aforementioned. Basically what I am trying to say is i'll never be in a relationship with a normal person because of my skin and obsession over dieting so my skin doesn't get worse. It's hard to accept. I'm at the point where I've come through suicide and accepted I'll never have 'normal skin'. So how do you find
someone else who is as broken as you to share your life with?
It's okay sweetheart, everything will be okay. I feel exactly the same way that you do. I have tried ending my life not only because of my skin but because of how lonely I feel every day. I have social anxiety as well, and some days are better than others. I'm sure that there are people out there that have worse skin than me but it doesn't make me feel any better. I want everyone to have clear skin, no matter how severe or minor it is. Nobody deserves to go through it. A couple years ago I had a boyfriend who committed himself to never eating dairy and it drastically improved his skin. I've heard that a lot of it is trial and error. I believe most of it is due to stress and too much sugar, but they all somehow link together. It's a vicious cycle, you get stressed because of acne, so you overeat or self medicate with drinking or pills, and then that makes you break out again. A trick that used to help me when I couldn't stand looking at myself is covering the mirrors in my room with a big scarf or toewel and looking down while I was in the bathroom so I couldn't see my reflection, it really helped me to not focus on my face and took away a lot of the anxiety I had when I saw myself. Even when I'm in a public restroom I look down so I don't have to see my reflection. It will get better, just please try to focus on the good things in your life. Drinking lots of water is important too buy a Brita pitcher and just keep chugging lemon water. When you wake up start your day off with a tall glass of water, and try to avoid caffeine. Lots of fresh fruits and veggies help too. I'll even eat raw garlic since I've heard the sulfur and alicin compounds can help get rid of break outs. Right now I'm suffering with this one huge cyst in between my eyebrows I can't wait til it goes away I just want to stay inside my house until it heals. Anyways, I hope you get some good sleep tonight and feel a bit better reading this. I am here to listen (:
Lisa <3
Clearly you are in so much pain. I completely understand the hurt and the social anxiety. Please remember you are SO much more than your skin. You said it yourself, you're athletic, artistic, and intelligent! You CAN get through this and fight through it. I believe in you and thanks for sharing your feelings.
Have you ever tried just giving up on your skin, I mean seriously, stop washing your face. It will get gross, you will get lots of clogged pores, pimples, possibly seb derm, but after that it gets better. I had tried too many products which just made my skin worse, it is so sensitive now, some very red parts of my face which seem to never heal. I had struggled with pimples, clogged pores, deep cysts, seborrheic dermatitis, skin damage, etc. I stopped washing my face, and everything got a lot worse, I had horrible seb derm, so I gave up. I washed my face again. But the next day I looked in the mirror and realized, my face was actually looking pretty good under all the gross dead skin and flakes. So I kept at it, used some head and shoulders condition on the seb derm and it went away... For good! My skin started healing, looking better, pimples went away. Slowly my face normalized, no longer oily or dry, but just right. Clogged pores diminished, I washed my face a few more times after waiting a week or two in between. Then quit altogether, tried jojobo oil on my clogged pores and they went away. I couldn't believe it, and I hated myself for losing so many years of my life and now I suffer the consequences with acne scars and skin damage.I was causing my skin problemsfrom the moment I started washing my face. I began since I started getting a few pimples on my forehead when I was a teen, and it only got worse, until I stopped.
Im in the same situation as you. Except that I suffer not only acne but have chronic hives everyday on face( sometimes its alot worse than acne).
I completely changed too and I also tried to end my life in 2015. But my dad saved me in time. If not I would be dead right now. Oh boy why Im I still alive? I suffer severe panick attacks everyday. I hate going out specially in the sun. And as you Im obsessed with my food. Like people dont understand me except my parents but not completely.
My social live is 0 like no more partys, going out with friends etc... Because I feel to ugly and depressed to do it. I try sometimes but I always end up crying at home. Also I dont work.
I can't give you advice but I wanted to share my storie with so you could see that you're not alone. I understand what you're living.
Good luck if you need to talk you can msg.
Porswis- Just a quick suggestion- I've had to FORCE myself to go out and I've never regretted it. Even though I feel super anxious when I go out with friends because of my acne, it always makes me feel better to be around them. I've also learned that they really don't notice it like I do. That's pretty much true with everyone. We notice our acne more than anyone else.
I know what you mean and I can completely empathize. If you look at my blog, you can see how horrible my skin was and what my mindset was throughout all of it. What helped me a lot was to avoid looking at the mirror and to surround myself with people who love you regardless. Try to go out with people who can make you forget you have acne. It helped me through my horrid skin.
I know exactly how you free bro. A month ago, I was travelling, partying and doing sports but my life flips just like that after I suffered acne breakout. Now, all I do is work and go home. I've been to 3 dermatologist already, I tried oral antibiotics, IPL and now I'm on accutane. I swear, I'm on the lowest point of my life right now. I feel like quitting my job but I just can't because of all the bills and stuff. I feel like everyone around me is looking at my face.
Now that I am trying a new solution for my problem, it has somehow given me a new hope. I just have to follow what my new dermatologist and I know my acne will clear up soon. So don't give up. Acne is something that can be cured. I am currently experiencing depression as well but I am trying my best to over come it. You have your life ahead of you!
You basically described me. I am a guy, with acne scars, who developed social anxiety from this. I am 22 and I have never been in a relationship because I don't think anyone would want me. I am in Dental Hygiene school right now and should graduate in around a year, trying to make the best out of my situation because unlike you my family has absolutely no money. Just a tip on how to beat the social anxiety - try to bring on the effects as hard as you can to try and demonstrate the anxiety to someone. When you purposely try to bring on the anxious feeling to show people the trembling, or shaking, it just doesn't come and won't let you show it. You have to really FEEL the anxiety to not let it take over. People consider me a pretty good looking guy, and I just started recently working out a lot so that helps with my confidence.
I happen to be gay as well, so it looks like we are meant for each other if you are gay haha:P
I hope you're feeling better this week! Just letting you know I still have this stupid cyst in my forehead and I will be going through a job interview this week so I'm hoping for the best. Everything will be so good in your life there are lots of people on here to support you (: best of luck
Hey, I've suffered with acne most of my life too, female 36, apart from 4-5 years post accutane treatment (which I sadly have to say we're the best years as I was so much more confident) I now have mild-moderate acne, but it still ruins my life. I've become a bit of a recluse lately and will only go out with my close friends and avoid meeting new people. I think what people don't understand is its more about how it makes you lose your confidence than anything else. Have you tried Roaccutane - you need to see a dermatologist and your acne needs to be severe to get it, but it will change your life and as a guy (less hormones) it's very unlikely to come back once it's gone. Anyway I'll stop rambling, just know your not alone xx
On Saturday, March 05, 2016 at 8:32 PM, jensweetone said:Porswis- Just a quick suggestion- I've had to FORCE myself to go out and I've never regretted it. Even though I feel super anxious when I go out with friends because of my acne, it always makes me feel better to be around them. I've also learned that they really don't notice it like I do. That's pretty much true with everyone. We notice our acne more than anyone else.
Thats what I'm trying to do now. Force myself to go out with my friends. Sometimes its great but others its terrible like I get big red hives on my face in a couple of seconds bcz I suffer from my chronic urticaria. This is everyday.
Its true they dont care about it as much as myself. But I feel so ashamed and ugly. At those moments I just want hide myself until my face clears up.
But thank you for the advice !