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My acne started getting really bad 2 years ago. I had been prescribed antibiotics and a retin-a as usual, and they didn't help much, but kept using them for about 5 months because I knew it was supposed to take time. my personality was deteriorating immensely. I pretty much stayed in my room all day. I no longer made plans with my friends, and I became distant. Every night when my bed hit the pillow I would wake up hoping to see some results. My acne resulted in lack of self-confidence and turned me into an introvert. While hiding in my bedroom, I would always think about the outgoing person I used to be. I was never afraid to be assertive and stand up for myself, I would always laugh and be happy. I had so many friends and I was extremely well liked. I would always have a good time with my family too. But acne took all that away from me. I would do anything and everything in my power to avoid being in a situation where someone could look at or say something about my acne. I had a couple of friends, but I never leaned on them like I would've, because I became such an introvert. Well by the time school had ended, my acne had started to get a tiny bit better, but there were still many painful cysts on my forehead and cheeks. My family had announced that we were going to China for vacation. And I feel that I ruined that trip for my parents. I just wanted to stay in bed the whole day, which isn't something you should do while on vacation. I held them back, I really did. But there we met my dad's cousin, who saw how bad my face was and made me a Chinese herbal remedy. I knew I had nothing to lose, so I drank the "soup". I don't know if this correlates to the fact that I got my first period a few days later, but I did. I didn't have much of an initial breakout, but by the time I got back to the U.S., my face was completely clear, and it all happened super fast. I stopped taking the antibiotics.Everything was a blur. I remember being just full of life, and extremely ecstatic about that. I was able to look people in the eye again, I was reaching out of my comfort zone, hung out with a long time crush. I was making plans left and right. I was just happy about the face I saw in the mirror. I didn't feel cocky, but I regained my confidence. my acne didn't even have food triggers anymore. It was so great to just not have to live in such a routine uptight way and just live. And go with the flow. I loved that. I finally felt comfortable in my own skin. Then, my acne started coming back. And it came back worse. My periods became irregular, and we tried making the herbal remedy again but I guess it had plateaud, or make it was my period. But either way, it came back. And there's no way to force a period or to force something to start working again. My situation was hopeless. My entire forehead was COVERED in bumps, along with 5-6 HUGE pustules to go along with it. This time I was getting acne on the cheek area next to my nose. They were so hard to get rid of and they hurt like a bitch. And as my acne got worse, so did my confidence. Again. I was back to square one. Except worse, in terms of acne and in terms of my personality. After that period without acne, it made the relapse 10x worse. I was so much more angry at the world for taking something away from me. Knowing what I would and can't be like anymore. And also knowing that pretty much nothing would help it anymore. I became so antisocial and just sad that my new, happy life was gone. I went back to hiding in my room again. Then we went to see a dermatologist again and I was prescribed a different combo of topical/oral treatments. These actually cleared the bumps and made me feel a bit better. But still, horrible recurring acne on the cheeks. The antibiotics started to make me nauseous, and my parents being as overprotective as they are made me stop taking them, and took me to a well-known Chinese herbal doctor. He selected a remedy that he thought would help my body's balanxe return to normal. Everything was fine at first, but I started getting so much acne. And I was constantly crying about how much it actually hurt when I tried to sleep on my side. About how acne shouldn't be like this. It shouldn't be something that keeps me from sleeping. It shouldn't be what I think about for most of the day. But it was. I struggled through those dark dark days, and my acne cleared up a ton. I thought all I had left was scars. Nope. 3 little cysts a few days later. Then another 3. Then another breakout. It was a constant cycle of getting my hopes up, breaking out, and being let down. and now I have these closed comedones known as clogged pores, which almost always turn into cysts. And I feel kinda helpless. I have extremely sensitive skin which keeps me from putting anything on it but my retin-a, cleanser, and moisturizer. And anything oral would interfere with the herbal remedy that's actually supposed to have worked by now. And I feel like acne it ruining my life. I KNOW there are so many things I would've done if acne didn't hold me back. I know it makes me feel unworthy, and not as good as other "normal" people. I know I feel like the ugliest person ever. What I don't know, is how to fix it.
If it makes you feel better I'm the same way and haven't work or gone to school or talked with friends since early december. I'm 19 and turn 20 in a few months At least I'm less stressed inside the house. Last Time I actually hanged with my friends was during august before college.
I know guys, it's a horrible disease- so tough on us emotionally
but you have to keep going, put all of your energy into a journal and be a detective to figure out what will help you...I attack acne on multiple fronts, after failed anti biotics and a course of Accutane this is what I did:
- diet, I journaled everything I ate, and went cold turkey on gluten and dairy, separately as they are the biggest triggers...gluten was big trigger for me and dairy some, but I still was breaking out
- I honed my supplements, read everything I could then introduced them slowly- I keep tweaking those to this day...my go-tos always are vitamin d (get tested!) and vitamin c
- same thing with topicals, keep trying till you get a routine that works for you
- no fluoride toothpaste, wash the pillow cases all the time, perfume and dye free laundry detergents...
- and a buddy, someone you can confide in, who will be there for you- friend or family, you just need ONE person
- and get outside, get some exercise, get some sun- GET OUT and get moving
- and education- don't stop, keep going- get some concealer and GO TO CLASS
Like mrsrobinson has shown, you have to accept that your body is different and you're going to have to put a lot of work into being acne free. You're never going to be carefree about breakouts like non acne sufferers, but the work is worth it when you see results and you are able to get your life back on track.
You are so young. It's great to start young when your skin will heal better. You NEED to see a gynecologist and explain that your acne breakouts seem correlated to periods/irregularity. It's extraordinarily common for skin issues to be connected with hormonal issues, especially in women. You need your hormones tested. Hormones were my issue, and I'd completely cut out dairy if that ends up being the case. There are natural hormones and lots of other crap in dairy that's meant for baby cows, and not so much humans with hormonal issues. I just tell people I'm lactose intolerant. Let them test your hormones and go from there. The gyno is probably going to shove birth control down your throat no matter what, and if you want it, take it. Second generation BC is safer than the newer brands. The new BC brands are dangerous for your cardiovascular system, gives 20 something women strokes and I personally wouldn't touch them. They're the common choice for your generation though, with no period opportunities and easier ways to be administered. So that's my wisdom if BC gets involved in your case. Spironolactone is another option if high androgen's (male hormones) ends up being the issue and you want to avoid BC.
If it's not hormones, it could be a gut issue. Dairy free is common, gluten free is another thing us acne sufferers take on. avoid really processed foods, clean up your diet so it's more natural. I like the journaling suggestion, just figure out your acne triggers. I highly recommend vitamin c and d3 as well. You don't need to super megadose, just go for the lowest vitamins they have and get a good amount going in your system. An insane amount is not going to help, it's just going to be flushed out of your system and having chronic high d and c in your system is not good. So 1000iu for d3 is good, and 250-500mg c is what I'd go with.
As far as face washes, go light. Don't be super harsh on your skin. I did benzoyl peroxide and clindamycin topical and that cleared me straight up. After that, I just use a light cleanser with no harsh ingredients. Like everything else though, this is highly individualized. So search around and find out what works best for you. Continue to moisturize, it's important no matter what. Don't touch your face, no picking, keep your hair pulled back, change pillowcases.
Don't strive for perfection, let it get better with time. Live! You're worth more than this problem. I know it's extremely hard, but keep your head up. I think your a teenager? It happens to all teenagers, you just got a bad case. You'll be on top of your skin and health game and in much better shape than your peers. You're going to come out of this much less shallow than most and with more respect for things beyond appearance. Don't let it take over your mind and life. You'll find out which friends are real and which aren't worth your time. Come back here when you feel alone with this. Active lifestyle and sun is actually good for acne too, it helps clear you up, so if nothing else use that as a reason to keep yourself going. Stress is bad too, so breathe and find time to relax. It'll get better.
Like mrsrobinson has shown, you have to accept that your body is different and you're going to have to put a lot of work into being acne free. You're never going to be carefree about breakouts like non acne sufferers, but the work is worth it when you see results and you are able to get your life back on track.
You are so young. It's great to start young when your skin will heal better. You NEED to see a gynecologist and explain that your acne breakouts seem correlated to periods/irregularity. It's extraordinarily common for skin issues to be connected with hormonal issues, especially in women. You need your hormones tested. Hormones were my issue, and I'd completely cut out dairy if that ends up being the case. There are natural hormones and lots of other crap in dairy that's meant for baby cows, and not so much humans with hormonal issues. I just tell people I'm lactose intolerant. Let them test your hormones and go from there. The gyno is probably going to shove birth control down your throat no matter what, and if you want it, take it. Second generation BC is safer than the newer brands. The new BC brands are dangerous for your cardiovascular system, gives 20 something women strokes and I personally wouldn't touch them. They're the common choice for your generation though, with no period opportunities and easier ways to be administered. So that's my wisdom if BC gets involved in your case. Spironolactone is another option if high androgen's (male hormones) ends up being the issue and you want to avoid BC.
If it's not hormones, it could be a gut issue. Dairy free is common, gluten free is another thing us acne sufferers take on. avoid really processed foods, clean up your diet so it's more natural. I like the journaling suggestion, just figure out your acne triggers. I highly recommend vitamin c and d3 as well. You don't need to super megadose, just go for the lowest vitamins they have and get a good amount going in your system. An insane amount is not going to help, it's just going to be flushed out of your system and having chronic high d and c in your system is not good. So 1000iu for d3 is good, and 250-500mg c is what I'd go with.
As far as face washes, go light. Don't be super harsh on your skin. I did benzoyl peroxide and clindamycin topical and that cleared me straight up. After that, I just use a light cleanser with no harsh ingredients. Like everything else though, this is highly individualized. So search around and find out what works best for you. Continue to moisturize, it's important no matter what. Don't touch your face, no picking, keep your hair pulled back, change pillowcases.
Don't strive for perfection, let it get better with time. Live! You're worth more than this problem. I know it's extremely hard, but keep your head up. I think your a teenager? It happens to all teenagers, you just got a bad case. You'll be on top of your skin and health game and in much better shape than your peers. You're going to come out of this much less shallow than most and with more respect for things beyond appearance. Don't let it take over your mind and life. You'll find out which friends are real and which aren't worth your time. Come back here when you feel alone with this. Active lifestyle and sun is actually good for acne too, it helps clear you up, so if nothing else use that as a reason to keep yourself going. Stress is bad too, so breathe and find time to relax. It'll get better.
Kay24 - thank you for taking time out of your day to help me like that. It really gave me a lot of hope and I will definitely talk to my parents about getting my hormones tested. I took my first tablet of vitamin d3 today- 800IU, to start light. Again,Thank you for all of your advice. It means a lot to me.
