I am supposed to be strong...because I am a woman...A grown woman..but in a way I feel it makes it worse...worse that at 32 I have to wake up everyday and see my skin acne infection whatever it is spreading and scarring my once normal face I took for granted. I was prescribed Accutane...but had to move...moved and now this new doctor wont give it to me..he thinks I have depression and wrote it all in his notes so now I have to find a psychiatrist who is going to write a letter and let me get on it...everyday my face gets worse and worse I wonder if its a staph infection or folliculitis as it just spreads and leaves red marks all over my once normal face. now I have pustules and cysts ruining my life and face...I want to be able to go back outside and smile and live and enjoy life. For Gods sake I have a little girl...that needs me...but I cant take it anymore...trying every antibiotic...and every medicine to watch it only get worse....whose going to love me with a scarred face....I don't even want to go out like this....Im so unhappy over this shit. I just want Accutane...and I cant get it....only GOd knows why....I wish this would just all go away....
Sankofa, I am so sad to hear about your situation. It's awful that the doctor won't give you the medicine you need especially considering you've taken it before. Like TD1978 said, is there a possibility that you could see another doctor? Or maybe it may be just best to wait until you see the psychiatrist.
I know it can get real tough to stay strong all the time. Especially when we have to start our morning looking at the very problem that makes us feel weak and defeated. But like you said, you have a little girl to whom you are the whole world (pimples, scars and all). Keep pushing on for her. Just remember that once you finally get that medication you need, things will finally start to clear up and with that any depression you may or may not have will lift as well.
What specialty is this physician that's refusing to prescribe you Accutane? Family Medicine, Internal Medicine, Dermatologist? Probably a primary care doc from the sound of it.
That doc is a coward. He/she is trying to cover his/her own ass by having you "psychologically cleared" to take Accutane. It's not that hard to diagnose true depression, and it's not that difficult to prescribe an anti-depressant.
What that doctor, and many other doctors don't realize (ESPECIALLY those who have never had acne issues themselves) is that moderate/severe cystic acne will only perpetuate a depressed mood. Depression is the symptom, not a cause in this case. Acne is the harbinger of sadness.
Please, do yourself a favor, and try to find a different doctor, one who actually cares more about patient care and not the possible liability of Accutane.
Just over a decade ago, I took Accutane myself for moderate-severe acne. For the first month, my skin was extremely dry and I would get regular nose bleeds. Chap stick was my best friend. I would blush very easily and my face at its worst, looked like a tomato. With that said, with all these signs and symptoms, I knew the Accutane was working. After 2-3 months, with new skin regenerating, my face began to take on a fresh new appearance. Hardly any new pimples formed. Skin was still dry, but nose bleeds became less frequent. After 7 months and upon completing the course of Accutane, I was a brand new person.
Granted, Accutane was a last resort for me. Went through multiple antibiotics, Proactiv, even a Vitamin B5 supplement. All fleeting, temporary treatments. Didn't trust the dermatologist initially. How wrong I was. Accutane literally transformed my face and my life. I absolutely would not be where I am right now career wise if it were not for Accutane. Back when I took it, it was being handed out like candy, without all the overregulation. Yes, perhaps there are those whose emotions worsen while on Accutane (probably during the first month). However, I would bet the majority of people who start taking Accutane are already sad (perhaps not truly clinically depressed) with their lives before they start taking it. And yes, you may end up being in the small percentage of people who incur some of the adverse side effects.
Nevertheless, if you've failed every other medication out there, don't let one doctor get in the way of an opportunity to possibly transform your life. Get a second opinion.
Hope it all works out for you.