Sometimes life seems to plague us with things that push us right to our breaking point before they get better. This is the way I feel about my acne. I have had acne for a few years now, but recently, it has been the worst ever. Both cheeks are dark red with marks from past cysts and current ones. I am a rising sophomore at a major American University on summer break. I have many friends, and I live a pretty normal life, apart from my acne. First off, I am male, and I wear makeup, and have worn makeup everyday of my life for the past year or more. Without it, I would not be able to leave my house. My friends do not struggle with acne, but I do, and this is what bugs me the most. My best friend has absolutely wonderful skin, and just seeing his face makes me ask God what I have done to deserve this punishment. Whatever I did, I strongly believe that the punishment does not fit the crime, not by a long shot. Those of you that dread going out in public, can't look people in the eye, and cringe when your face is hit by the sun know exactly how agonizing this curse can be. For example, only two of my friends know that I wear makeup (my closest two friends). My roommate is not one of these two people. Because of this, I have to wake up at times when my roommate is not in the room, so I can apply my makeup alone. Also, I have to wait until he, and everyone else I hang out with, is asleep before I take my mandatory shower at night to wash off my makeup before I go to sleep. This, if you are familiar with college life, can be a daunting task and can really affect academic performance. I have always been a very intelligent person, and a really good student. I managed to be the valedictorian of my high school graduating class, and I mustered a 3.84 GPA my freshman year at college. Now, back to the purpose of this post. My acne has become so bad that I cannot enjoy life like I know I should be able to at this age. There are many of you that will say something like, "don't let the acne bother you, you can enjoy life anyway, forget it, don't worry." Well, as many others can attest, it does not work that way. Acne is the thought on my mind for 90 percent of every day of my life. And it's always the first and the last thought of everyday. I have cried numerous times just because I looked in the mirror. I cant take living like this much longer, so I have decided to do something to fix my acne once and for all and here's how it starts:
First of all, I am not washing my face with any harsh soaps/acids any longer because if my acne is this bad, they are not working. I'm sorry, that's just the way it is. I will use only water in the morning and evening, unless I have to wash off my makeup.
Second, I am not going to touch/pick/rub/feel/graze/tap my face, at all, ever. This only makes it worse, and I have to stop at once. Starting.........now.
Finally, I am going to stay inside for as many days as possible so I do not have to apply makeup (one of the main causes of my acne in my opinion)
I don't know how long this is going to take, but like I said in the beginning, I am at my breaking point when it comes to acne, and having to put up with this nonsense. My life is getting worse, as my acne does the same. When will the torture end? I have no idea. If anyone out there reads this, and shares some of my issues, I would love to hear your thoughts, struggles, or words of encouragement.
To end, I would like to leave you with this thought: A person that once had acne and is now completely cured will be a wonderful individual. This person will be beaming with confidence, and no challenge, I mean no challenge on Earth, will be too difficult to overcome. This person will love life, and will be thankful to just be alive. A person that has been cured of terrible, self-esteem killing acne will be an awesome person. Sometimes I wonder if this is the reason that God has decided to put me through this trouble. I find comfort in the fact that one day, I will be able to walk outside, with no makeup on, on a very sunny day, and greet anyone that I see with a smile, looking them dead in the eyes knowing that life is wonderful.
I know how you feel, today everyone was going to the pool, and I REALLY didn't want to go, as my makeup would wash off and everyone would see my horrible skin. But i went, my makeup barely washed off, and i think my rocking bod' (LOL) distracted everyone from my skin. So I know it's hard to do, but if you just don't think about it, I'm pretty sure people will be able to see the real you, and your acne wont matter. But that's just me 
I know how hard it is to move on, as acne dominates most of my thought. What I do is color in "bad" mirrors, take deep breaths and imagine all the stress over my acne leave me body, and to listen to happy music. Good luck, your regime sounds great.
Thank you so much for responding. I love happy music, and it's one of the things that keeps my going. I haven't been swimming in over a year because of acne, well, makeup, and it's really frustrating. I am extremely self conscious about my appearance and i struggle going out in the sun, and it would be impossible for me to go swimming right now. I am glad that acne did not keep you from swimming, that's wonderful. I hope to be at that point again very soon. Once again, thanks for the encouragement. It really helps. I can't wait until it's over, for good.
If you're of the opinion that the products you use and the approach you have taken isn't working, there's nothing to lose by quitting the products and changing your approach.
It does feel like a leap of faith to quite the washes and topicals and so on, given that we're led to believe these things are suppose to fix the problem, but sometime they do more harm than good. When I think back, I only started getting acne when I started using all those products to clear the odd pimple. It got worse, I used more products. Worse still, even more products. The cycle just goes on and on.
These days, I'm down to simply washing twice a day with a light cleanser. Haven't quite been brave enough to use just water as yet. It's made a huge difference. Also, after my last breakout cleared I went two weeks without picking. I didn't get a single pimple the whole time. Two weeks is all it took for me to break a cycle which had essentially lasted almost 13 years. Speaks volumes I reckon.
I wouldn't have changed my approach had I not joined the Org, I honestly can't express how much this place and the people here have helped me. Another amazing site to have a look it, if you're not already aware of it, is The Love Vitamin.
Good luck!
If you're of the opinion that the products you use and the approach you have taken isn't working, there's nothing to lose by quitting the products and changing your approach.
It does feel like a leap of faith to quite the washes and topicals and so on, given that we're led to believe these things are suppose to fix the problem, but sometime they do more harm than good. When I think back, I only started getting acne when I started using all those products to clear the odd pimple. It got worse, I used more products. Worse still, even more products. The cycle just goes on and on.
These days, I'm down to simply washing twice a day with a light cleanser. Haven't quite been brave enough to use just water as yet. It's made a huge difference. Also, after my last breakout cleared I went two weeks without picking. I didn't get a single pimple the whole time. Two weeks is all it took for me to break a cycle which had essentially lasted almost 13 years. Speaks volumes I reckon.
I wouldn't have changed my approach had I not joined the Org, I honestly can't express how much this place and the people here have helped me. Another amazing site to have a look it, if you're not already aware of it, is .
Good luck!
Thank you. I have tried not picking in the past, but I can never resist the urge. I see my skin getting a bump, and I feel like I have to get it out. But, I have read some of your posts before actually and you were one of the main people that convinced me that not touching your face really works. I sure hope it does for me. Congratulations on being able to resist touching your face, it's really tough, and the people that don't struggle with this don't understand how hard it can be to stop.
Well, it's early into the first day not wearing makeup, and thus not going out in public. I love to be with people, so it is very hard for me to stay inside all day, alone, but I know that I have to get rid of this acne at once. I took a shower this morning and used only water on my face, and I am trying to refrain from looking in the mirror as much as possible. If this clears my acne, or I see any improvements, I will be sure to let you all know.
yes you do have to move on...because life is hard...but itAs beautiful at the same time. and we need to enjoy life because we only live it once. hopefully soon or later...your acne would go away even if it takes some years. itAs been alot of months that i donAt care so much about my acne anymore...and my acne is now fading away slowly. i just live life because...acne is not a terminal disease (like i always say) so no need to be depressed on something that has a solution.
The only thing I have to say is that hiding away won't help. I am still hiding away, and it's a year later (althoguh I've only been able to clear my skin up to a comfortable level pretty much within the last week) Can you find the courage to be around those two friends who know you wear makeup? Since they know you wear makeup, they know you have skin issues, and clearly will be sympathetic. I remember a while ago, months ago actually, my acne was worse than it is now (red marks might not have been as numerous). I went to the gym with a friend, and I was so nervous.. yet I actually felt okay with her seeing me. I felt uncomfortable, but I didn't feel uncomfortable because of her. So surround yourself with those you really feel close to and allow yourself to still interact with life. Just under your own terms, you know? I'm thinking I'm gonna need to start doing stuff like that myself. My friend leaves in about a week, I will need to try and force myself to make plans with her.
But I know how you feel. It's really hard to feel like you don't have control over your acne, and then when trying to clear up the acne it's hard to purposefully give up any control you might have in hopes your skin can clear itself up. It's a nasty, emotionally painful waiting game. One thing you might want to try is taking naps. It always seems to make my skin look better. I just find it hard to make myself nap unless I didn't sleep well lol.
I honestly don't have the courage to be around anyone on Earth without makeup on right now, and that's why it is so hard for me. Both of the friends that know about the makeup are friends that attend the same University as me, and currently it is summer break, and I will not see them again until August. I do feel a lot better now that they know, however. Before they knew I felt really alone and like an outsider. But the fact that they still accept me just as much as they did before they knew really help.
Hi, I came to this page after I googled, "Acne is killing me, help me". I have had acne for almost 6 years now and now my face looks like something I don't want to describe. I have gone to dermatologists before but all they said was it was because of my growing age but now I'm nearly 19 and will move on to a university soon. I have zero courage of moving on with a face like this. I can't wear tanks cuz my biceps are full of marks :'( I'm a straight A student as well but my confidence is decreasing day by day. I have never worn make-up, I lead my daily life with my ugly face and try to be nice and funny to people so that they like me for who I am. I try to dress as good as possible and try to shift people's thoughts from my face and I have recieved compliments for my fashion many times before. I have stopped using all kinds of products and I am just using this bioderma face wash now. I am thinking of going to a new well renowned dermatologist in the upcoming week. One thing is that I'm not a loner and have many friends but acne is stopping me from getting into a relationship because I keep thinking who would love me with this scarred face. Sometime I wish I could wear different masks :'( It actually is a curse...
Hi, I came to this page after I googled, "Acne is killing me, help me". I have had acne for almost 6 years now and now my face looks like something I don't want to describe. I have gone to dermatologists before but all they said was it was because of my growing age but now I'm nearly 19 and will move on to a university soon. I have zero courage of moving on with a face like this. I can't wear tanks cuz my biceps are full of marks
I'm a straight A student as well but my confidence is decreasing day by day. I have never worn make-up, I lead my daily life with my ugly face and try to be nice and funny to people so that they like me for who I am. I try to dress as good as possible and try to shift people's thoughts from my face and I have recieved compliments for my fashion many times before. I have stopped using all kinds of products and I am just using this bioderma face wash now. I am thinking of going to a new well renowned dermatologist in the upcoming week. One thing is that I'm not a loner and have many friends but acne is stopping me from getting into a relationship because I keep thinking who would love me with this scarred face. Sometime I wish I could wear different masks
Hi, I came to this page after I googled, "Acne is killing me, help me". I have had acne for almost 6 years now and now my face looks like something I don't want to describe. I have gone to dermatologists before but all they said was it was because of my growing age but now I'm nearly 19 and will move on to a university soon. I have zero courage of moving on with a face like this. I can't wear tanks cuz my biceps are full of marks
Look around how lot of people have got clear. Its not impossible.