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About nutterbutter

  • Birthday 02/01/1988

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    Hi! Okay, so as much as I want to give a full detail on my scars, I try not to do so, only because I don't like taking close up photos of them, cos it only make me feel sad. So, I'm sorry if there's not much reference for you guys to see. I think if I'm going to post some photos, it'll be photos of me being happy and not close-up shots of my scars---I don't think in real life, anyone would look and talk to me up close, maybe close but not that close---So, my point is that, I may post pictures, but not close up shots... unless I change my mind... hopefully I'm not tooo confusing(?)

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  1. I just took my first capsule, earlier I spoke to my derm on the phone about the paraben in my accutane. I'm still scared to death cos like I've said the last time I used something that contains paraben (pca phaze 18 cream) caused me to have nodulistic acne which now caused me a good amount of permanent scars. My derm said that I should just try out the pills first and see if there's gonna be a reaction. I'm soooo scared my face better not swell up like it did the last time. And there's huge dif
  2. Hi, I got my 20 mg SOTRET (isotretinoin capsules) yesterday. The lady asked me if I'm allergic to some medications, I said "no" cos I'm not aware of it. I opened the package, then read the long warning label that came with the Px, then I read that the preservative for my accuatane is "parabens." I decided not to take a pill until I talk to my doctor, I'm not sure if I'm allergic to parabens, all I know is that I used to use a cream on my face that contained parabens w/c caused me to have nodul
  3. Citizenpanda, This is really inspiring! I have some shallow rolling cars on my cheeks, I wonder if needling would help it to raise up a little bit(?) By the way, how did you look for the place/Dr. who did the needling for you? Thanks for posting this, the results are incredible!!!!!!
  4. i don't think it has really improved, the angle of the "model's" face was different and that affects the severeness/ appearance of the scar. and yea, that scar was really unusual i haven't seen anything like it, mine are like little rolling scars all over.
  5. I forgot to mention this one. I rushed to Long's Drugs before I went to school to grab a Clean n Clear Oil absorbing film, and when I got to the counter.......THE GIRL ASKED ME: "DOES THIS WORK?" I WAS SO INSULTED, COS HELLO! I HAVE BAD ACNE, AND I DIDN'T WANT TO TAKE HER COMMENT AS SARCASM COS I DON'T WANT TO RUIN MY WHOLE DAMN DAY! So I replied, "Well they help!" Psshhh.........
  6. I have a book full of quotes, basically words of wisdom. I'm trying to read "The Purpose Driven Life" but I'm stuck to chapter 1. Actually playing with my baby sister helps out a lot, makes me forget what I look like.
  7. I feel like I'm stuck in my "lonely" period. I know it's a choice, but honestly, I just couldn't find any energy to put myself out there again. My friends are nice, they call me, and they are willing to hang out with me. They've seen the worst of me.... when I had to endure the pain of using Tazorac for the first (but now it came back). Seriously, I think I have a problem, I haven't shopped for any new clothes for like 9 months now. I don't even want to go to go grocery shopping. Even if I wan
  8. Well, I always think about this everyday.. "what if" what if I didn't have acne" You know, I won't be "hot" But I might be happier because I won't have to say "no" to my friends most of the time, and even if they completely accept me for who I am, and my acne, I think it's me who couldn't accept myself. These days, I see my acne as my "test" you know other people who have clear skin now, they later on suffer in life, some of them suffer/battle other diseases. No one lives on the planet and no
  9. it's not about what they say, it's how they say it. I mean, some people who tells me to "use proactiv" or give me suggestions is fine with me, I don't think they're trying to be mean. But what really irritates me is when it comes from my family, and it makes it just awkward. Whenever me and my sister argue, I'd get mad on how she dresses for her age, and I'd tell her.." look at you....you look like..." and she's gonna flip out and tell me "look at your face!" with her very condescending eyes as
  10. I've done this many times, gee.... I hate it when I have to plan almost everything based on how my acne looks. I plan which semester to enter! this year I started during summer, I could've started during winter but gosh, I just can't help it w/ people staring. Summer classes, I only took one class, cos I don't think I'd be able to handle it! Now I'm about to take accutane, I guess I might miss more classes (hopefully I won't resort to that again though)!!!!!
  11. Ya, I regret not taking it soon, I'm hoping that if I try accutane that it'll be the last thing I have to try. It's hard to find a derm that understands me, I though my current derm is understanding but I later found out that he's like everyone else, he doesn't really care..... Like I came back to ask him about my scars, and he said ... "you have 5 years to have a boyfriend..... at least it's not bulging/coming off at the side of your face" (cos i have like the bump/ raised scars).... So ya I w
  12. I just want to put out a positive spirit in this forum , even though my acne is slowly coming back. I just want to thank those people who responded on my first thread, "When to tell when a guy is looking at you and not what's on ur face?" You know what? I took your opinions to heart and started acting myself again during the most part since I posted that topic. I did see a huge difference on how people responded to me. I mean, before, I always frown, didn't talk much and was just kind of asham