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Blog Entries posted by MonroeQT

  1. MonroeQT
    Hey everyone. I'm approximately 2 weeks into my Spiro regime(50 mg), so it's update time. I do "think' my skin is improving but I'm not sure if I can attribute that to Spiro as of now. I have just finished one month of the clear skin vitamin pack by Innate Skin, and I think that has been helping me more than anything else. I don't see a substantial difference, but there is improvement regardless. My skin is very up and down right now, which is disheartening. My skin will appear to be clearing up one day, and BAM, I get 3-4 new cysts the next day. I know that when you heal your acne internally it can take at least 3-6 months to see significant progress. I'm trying to stay positive, and I am avoiding mirrors as much as possible. My diet has been shit, so I'm sure that factors in somehow. I'm going to compile a list of "acne fighting" foods this week, and hopefully make up some meal-plans so I can stay on track. I'm hoping to move up to 100 mg of Spiro next month, because, frankly I just want to get ALL of the initial breakouts out of the way at once. My skin routine is the same. I'm still using daily manuka masks, and drinking at least a cup of matcha per day. The only new addition to my regime has been 2 grams of Fish Oil per day. My MIL is coming to visit this Friday, so I'm glad to be distracted from thinking about my skin for a bit. Hopefully by the one-month mark I will have a better update!
  2. MonroeQT
    I had a TERRIBLE week, but finally my skin appears to be recovering. I have chronic depression, and last week was just terrible for me. I think I wrote in my last post that I had to cancel my therapist appointment because I was too anxious to be around people with my oozing scabs(that I created). Well, I thought I had learned my lesson from that, and I vowed that I would NEVER pick again, but that didn't last very long. I experienced a bad initial breakout from my daily Manuka Honey masks and out of frustration, I tried to pop the dozens of pimples that literally appeared overnight to no avail. Of course, that made everything SO MUCH worse, they weren't even large ones, just a bunch a small pimples with no head. But after I was done, every single one had turned into an inflamed mess. I have a feeling that if I had just left them alone, they would have went away really quickly, but hindsight is 20/20. I haven't experienced an IB since accutane, so I did not know how to handle it at all. I also was using a soap that I think did more damage as it brought my angular cheilitis back(something I haven't had since accutane). So, now I'm back to using my Konjac Sponge for a cleanser, and it's really helping the healing process. I'm still using the Manuka Honey, but I'm using one with a UMF of 15+ instead of the 10+. It's honestly amazing how fast my skin started to heal after I cut out my cleanser. I'm pretty disappointed though because that sucker was 28 dollars, and it was given a perfect score from Paula's Choice. I haven't seen one bad review on it, but my skin is ultra sensitive and it burned like a mother when I used it so it's got to go. I still have a few active pimples, but I refuse to touch them. Picking is seriously the worst thing you can do to your skin. As much as Pimples suck, oozing scabs are 10x worse, so I'm done. I forgot to mention that I bought the clear skin pack from Innate Skin. It contains vitamins to improve skin, and it has great reviews online, so I hope it works for me as well as it has for others'.
  3. MonroeQT
    So, my endo. appt went really well! I explained my symptoms to my doctor and he said that he is almost certain that I have PCOS. He wants me to do some lab work to confirm that I don't have anything else going on, but he started me on 50 mg on Spiro that day. It's only been a few days, so I haven't noticed any change in my acne yet. I have been urinating a TON(Spiro is a diuretic), and my migraines have been much worse. I already drink plenty of water, but I guess I need to start drinking more because I really don't need more migraines in my life. I'm so pleased that he actually listened to me. I feel like, had I went to a dermatologist instead, they would have given me some topical and called it a day. My acne is definitely an internal problem, so I'm happy I'm taking something to address that. I haven't changed anything else from my routine. I'm still avoiding dairy, soy, nightshades, and gluten as much as possible. My skincare routine is the same, and I feel that, while it may not be getting rid of my acne, it is calming my skin down quite a bit. 
  4. MonroeQT
    So I'm dong OK I suppose. I fucking picked again. It's been harder to stop than I imagined it would be. I like to think I have good self- control. I became a vegetarian when I was 13, I pulled myself out of my alcoholism that I've had since I was 14, I overcame my OCD on my own when I was 10(officially diagnosed later on), but I can't stop picking. It's very frustrating. I'm starting to think my picking is actually a manifestation of my OCD, because it is quite obsessive and senseless in nature. I don't get whiteheads, I get nodules and cysts, so there's no way anything good will come from picking. Yet, I still do it.  My skin has been going through some drastic ups and downs lately, and it's really taking a toll on me. I recently cut out gluten, soy, and nightshades from my diet; all of which I used to eat A LOT of. I'm really hoping this will bring about some change. I already don't eat cheese, and meat, so it's getting harder to come up with interesting, and tasty meals. But, if I get clear skin as a result, it is a very small price to pay. Aside from my chin, the rest of my skin is very clear. My color has started to come back(I'm naturally yellow/olive, but since my acne came back my face has been very pink). I know that my acne is hormonal, so I'm very glad that I have the chance to talk to an endocrinologist about it soon. I'm also interested in getting a food allergy test done. It kind of feels like I'm shooting in the dark here, so it would be nice to have something of substance to go off of. Who should I speak to about that? My family doctor? I'm willing to bet I have a few food allergies as I'm allergic to several medicines. I REALLY don't wan't to go back on Accutane, but my skin is getting bad. I'm still drinking my matcha green tea, and applying manuka honey daily. I suspect that I'm currently experiencing an IB from the Manuka Honey, but I'm not sure how long it's supposed to last. It's not that I can't take the breakouts, I just want to know that I'm on the right path and that it will all be worth it in the end. I'm hopeful that the Manuka is just pulling out all the gunk from my pores, and that soon I will have clear skin. I'm afraid to stop the Manuka, because for all I know, I could be one week away from clear skin again. In other news, I'm really happy that husband is coming home soon. I've been having a really hard time lately, between the breakouts and my new Epilepsy medicine(which causes me to feel lethargic, and dizzy all of the time). It's nice having someone who supports you no matter what, so I'm thankful for that. 
  5. MonroeQT
    I feel like complete shit right now, it's like I have reverted back to my 16 year old self. I finally mustered up the courage to put some makeup on and go to my therapist appointment, but I ended up cancelling anyway as I hid in the parking lot. It is super hot out today and I didn't even realize my makeup had melted off where I had concealed my scabs. I realized it when I got in the parking lot(was already 5 minutes late), and I desperately searched for some makeup in the car. The only thing I could find was some melted liquid foundation that ended up making everything look 10x worse. My scabs were oozing and bloody, and I just did not have the courage to sit in a waiting room with 20 other people looking that way.  I lost a job over this once. I was always late because I always had a giant scab to cover, which if you're a picker, you know how difficult that can be, or I called in all the time because I was too anxious to face the world. I just wish I had the confidence to say fuck it, and I thought I did, but here I am again;my 16 year old self stuck in a 24 year old's body. Of all days, I needed to see my therapist today. If it had just been him, I would have gone, but I just don't have the fortitude to face 20 other people right now. I rescheduled for Monday, so I hope he can help me through this. It doesn't help that my husband is away at Military training either. I just feel so alone.
  6. MonroeQT
    Seriously, what is wrong with me? My skin JUST started clearing up, so what do I do? Decide to eat sugar. I know this makes me break out, but yet here I am again. Those "little pimples" I had are now nodules. But, that's not the main reason I'm upset. I'm disappointed in myself because I can't stop picking at my skin. I'm not a "normal" picker either, I take picking to a whole new level. I always try to pop my cysts and nodules even though I know nothing will come out and that I will end up doing more damage. I just spent almost an hour trying to pop ONE nodule. After nothing came out, I began to scratch the shit out of my skin until several layers of skin came off. Even when I started to bleed(a lot), I did not stop. Mind you, all the while this is happening, I'm mentally telling myself that I'm being an idiot, and that this is non-productive. However, I could.not.stop. It wasn't until my hand got sore that I decided it was enough. I want to mention that I have been diagnosed with OCD, so I know that factors into this. When you have OCD it's like you're not in control of your own body, and I'm not talking about the "I like my house clean *he he*, I have OCD" kind of OCD, I mean real OCD. Ugh. I put some honey on my wounds and I am going to try not to obsess over my skin too much. 
  7. MonroeQT
    I need to stop picking, I just don't know how. I came this close to cancelling my therapist appointment today because I don't know how the hell to cover this up. My anxiety is through the roof today. But I think of all days, I need to go today more than ever. Im tired of letting the depression consume me. I'm going to try to face my fears one baby step at a time... 

  8. MonroeQT
    I'm feeling really good today. I've been doing a manuka face mask every day and it seems to be helping a lot. I woke up to less breakouts today and overall my skin is much calmer since I've cut out all my acne products. I did eat a candy bar today and yesterday because I'm pmsing pretty badly. I really hope that doesn't result in a bad breakout especially because my skin is just now starting to heal but I just couldn't resist lol. 

  9. MonroeQT
    I'm feeling ok today. I woke up to 3 new(but small) pimples today. I'm assuming it's from the sugar I ate a few days ago. *Sigh* I also went out drinking last night(something I rarely do now), so that could be a cause too. I did a clay mask today, followed by a manuka honey mask so I'm hoping to see a reduction in blemishing tomorrow. Aside from the new breakouts, my skin appears to be a lot healthier. I drank a cup of matcha green tea this morning, and I plan on drinking another cup before bed. I have a feeling that my daily cup of  matcha green tea helped prevent a potentially bad breakout that I usually get after consuming sugar. 
  10. MonroeQT
    Do NOT take more than 50mg of zinc at a time. I thought I could take two pills with dinner; big mistake. I literally just had projectile vomiting because of this. I will NOT do that again, ever. It takes A LOT to make me throw up too. 
  11. MonroeQT
    So far, so good. My face feels MUCH less irritated today. I still have about the same number of breakouts, but my skin appears to be calming down. I used my first clay mask today which seemed to be helpful. I could actually see the spots of oil that the mask pulled from my face, which was really cool. I know it's hard to tell from the picture, but my blemishes are more pink today. I've only had 2 new spots form since Tuesday so I am hopeful that I will continue to clear up. I'm very excited that my Organic Matcha came in today after waiting 2 weeks for it to arrive. I really can tell the difference in my skin when I don't have it. So far, I haven't seen any improvement from the zinc, but I've only been supplementing for a few weeks so time will tell...

  12. MonroeQT
    Today is day 1. I washed my face with the Ju Ju bar by drunk Elephant, toned with my toner by Jacq's organics, and Moisturized with Toogga's Desert Date oil. I also applied a honey mask for a few hours which seemed to soothe my skin. I purchased some Manuka honey today so that I can experience the full effects from honey. I bought it from Amazon so I will have to use my really raw honey until that comes in. I plan on applying aspirin with a touch of raw honey onto my active spots tonight. My face seems to be less irritated than it was yesterday. I have several active breakouts but they are less red than they were yesterday. I purchased the AMtherapy moisturizer from EltaMd today as well. I needed a daytime moisturizer, and after some research that seemed to be the best fit for my skin type. I will post pictures of my skin tomorrow.