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Posts posted by pleaseoplease

  1. heylo skin. why won't you clear all your gunk out already. i'm almost done with month 3, and still, so many clogged pores. like weird bubbly looking things that look like they're trying to clear, but then when they do more come to substitute their beloved absence. um. i am dumbfounded. i was clear at this point during my last course, and strange thing is my skin was waaaaay worse then. then again, i was on a higher dose. good news is no angry actives. note to self: be grateful.

  2. sorry poor log for not updating but i was at my auntie's helping her move in to her new place...which meant no internet. but back on track!

    Day 80 something or rather

    i'm constantly afraid of being too optimistic or daring to bear good news, simply because of the infamous, scientific law called "jinksing." yessir. but knock on wood, or this imitation wood veneer known as ikea, there are sunny skies in this forecast of mine.

    things to remind myself to be grateful for: the bruises from the laser treatment have faded away, the few passer-by pimples limit themselves to smaller diameters, and red marks not so...red. ha it almost made me smile when i saw myself in that horrid enemy called the rear-view mirror in broad daylight, and i was like wow, i can actually stand to look. ha. the thing was, i remember this exact time last year looking in that mirror (parent's car), while on my first course, thinking aw shit shitty shit shit. please fast-forward. but now, mm i ought to allow myself to feel preety good.

    update: few clogged pores. lingering marks are a given. and for some reason my arms have been breaking out with little bumps. wtf. they're much better than how they were last month, but still they weren't a problem before accutane.? holding on to that 'time heals all wounds' deal or my remix 'accutane heals all acne-forms'

    more to say but save it for laters...

  3. o deary dear dear! you must resent me for my absence but please forgive me. purdy please. purdy girl. but i'm back! and here to stay until you and i finish this course!

    let's hear an update. how are you, and i mean that. not just pimple-count, etc-wise, but in all other aspects. i know from experience that from rock-bottom the only way left is up, so hopefully you're up there. don't hold back any rants, venting, gibberish, and all goodies.

  4. not that you'll be reading this post most likely, but hey second courses of accutane are the one-two punch. i don't remember the percentages but you could more than easily find it in studies on a google search, but a good percentage of accutaners go on a second course (though the first course as you noted helps tremendously) and go on to find long-term relief- dare i say permanent. yea so i blabber all this because i was/am in the same boat and chose to go on a second course (presently on it) and appreciating the slow, stead results as they come. maybe you could consider it. i just knew it would put me out of my misery of the not knowing if/when the acne surprises would subside.

  5. today was CA-RAZAY! phew. first, i've been experiencing this phenomenal life-altering change. philosophy class has been like a dose of medicine that woke me up from this coma of ignorance, i guess you could say. this may be the most bizarre comment to ever sweep acne.org: but i love what acne has done for me. i don't want to be just another someone who overcomes it and says, phew, i'm glad that's over with, now i can bask in my hott self again. no, i'm going to embrace the luggage that came with acne: understanding, compassion, humility, gentleness, warmth, and my god, everything that makes a person just...worth it.

    i could go on and on, but nah.

    so i was driving home from class like at ten at night, and right then freak weather hits los angeles. long story short, right before my exit, the car starts slowing down, and the Oh Shit dawns upon me. by some stroke of luck, i make it to the fork between the freeway and the exit's offramp, kinda snuggled between the two with the vibrations of cars flying past, for like, an hour in the rain. but the whole time i think to myself, man this is some view. it really was, to see- no actually feel- life rushing past you forever and ever. the end.

    now this will definitely sound weird, but i found myself mildly attracted to the tow-truck driver. no, it's not that i can't get guys, hah, but because this guy had a life i found intriguing. his truck smelled like vegas, which i like even though i don't smoke (or no longer), and he was like someone you could live your life next to (not in a marriage way). why does this remind me of that movie crash, where the narrator says something like we all just want so badly to feel that we crash into each other. so i make no sense.

    skin-wise, the mild sprout seems to be simmering down. sszz. more to update tomorrow or day after. ok this is supposed to be more about acne, i know.

  6. dude, i almost forgot...when i saw your pic just then, that you silly-ly (ha!) labeled gross, i was going to write:

    i must buy you a new pair of eyes to go with that purdy face

    hellz you've got to admit, that should be the next best pick-up line to sweep the world. or city. or block. or maybe just my house.

    i found an old song that made my day...um last week. maybe it'll make yours. though my reasons were more geared toward heartbreak. (it was my choice, though i realized after i had made a terrible one.)


    ok now i must stop visiting acne.org so often. in a while crocodile.

  7. (note: that picture was not at all gross. and i'm not just saying that to comfort you either!) :)

    i am a layman, but i absolutely believe several conditions can develop into acne. just look at rosacea, which has been dermatologically recognized as having acne-like symptoms in more progressed stages. oddly enough, when i had countless little bumps eveywhere, some of them actually started to develop into pimples! i just knew that if this didn't get treated, and fast, i would be crashing head-on into some major acne. i applied the Verdeso, the bumps vanished, and by no coincidence i'm sure, so did the inflamation (as there was nothing for bacteria to infect).

    that bizarre outbreak i had, i'm certain, can be attributed to the retin-a i was on, as i researched eczema. you had mentioned how it all started after wearing a hat, and that would be one hell of a coincidence to have had this mystery outbreak right after, and even moreso, right on your forehead where the hat was. o and you know what, that outbreak of mine looked exactly like yours when yours first started, having looked at your first photos. there's only once conclusion, your case, considering the same appearance, may have been eczema (if my doctor's diagnosis was correct, that is).

    and yes, funny you should ask that, because it seriously looked like (tons and tons) of plugged bumps (like there was actually gunk wanting to come). i remember how when i caught a glimpse of myself in the rear-view mirror, you know how the sun sort of hits you at an angle, i felt my heart sink to my stomach at the sight of a sea of countless bumps. when i sat in the derm's chair, i even so much as asked, "how do you know it's eczema, and not whiteheads, because it really looks like whiteheads? it looks so bad that i may have to go back on accutane." she smiled, and said she just had a trained eye. but boy i praise my lucky stars for her, because she sure was right.

    want my honest opinion? i think you may be past that stage of prevention, since it has already developed into acne. is there still bumpiness? i don't know if it's just because the photo doesn't capture it, or if i just can't tell. from what i see it doesn't look like it. well i ask because if there still are bumps like in the first photos in the gallery, you could at least take caution to prevent the remaining bumps from turning into acne by asking for some Verdeso. like i said, at this point, since you mention it's been 5 months, i'm not sure of how much help it could do (i hope that doesn't offend), but i'd like for you to at least try and see if could in fact help. no harm in trying right? if that doesn't work out, please don't feel down. because you know what, no matter the cause, accutane will still take care of it. that's for certain. and like i said before, the v-beam will take care of the redness, so check that right off your list of worries, okies?

    don't be sorry about rants. remember, that's what i'm here for. instead of mi casa es su casa, how about, your worries are my worries.

    btw, is there any slight possibility that you live in los angeles? i only ask because maybe i could help you out (doctor info, inexpensive laser clinics, etc.).

    i just realized that this was a long-ass reply, srry for that. haha you haven't fallen asleep have you? i've got a log too if you ever need/want to stop by. cheerio. (though cheerios taste like cardboard i think...)

  8. now that's a thinker. it can't be a rash or allergic reaction, if there is no itchiness. but definitely a reaction of some sort. good news is you see it fading, so it's on the road to recovery. how's it looking today?

    i almost forgot to mention, which i wanted to from the first time i saw your log. have you (or your dermatologist) ever considered eczema as being a culprit? the strange thing is, a month or so ago i had thee very same thing as your first pic (i think it was), with a crazy attack of tiny bumps isolated, then spread to the rest of the face. it was bizarre in that it came from nowhere land?! it seriously looked like it could have been a mild form of acne, but like everywhere. the derm told me than coincidently another girl before me came in with the exact same situation, and she diagnosed it as eczema. whether or not she was right (i'm a layman, but from what i know eczema comes with certain outbreaks, which i've never experienced before, so who knows) but but butt, she prescribed me this steroid called Verdeso- perfect for us acne-sufferers since it's a foam and doesn't clog pores. anywho, in a couple of days my skin looked marvelous, and poof it was all gone. (then poof i was purging again, but because of evil retin-a...sorry i digress)

    so that makes me wonder if that was the case with you, but since it was not stopped, it progressed to a stage of acne (like mine looked like it was well on its way to). and maybe you're still showing symptoms of it? iunno i just thought it might give you a certain avenue of direction to look into, since we're scratching our heads at the moment. let me know how goes it.

  9. aw funny bunnies...hath means has, so september has thirty

    i have short-term memory when it comes to all things useful, so here's my fail-proof method:

    make a fist, and look at your top knuckles. the 'peaks' are the thirty-one days, and the 'valleys'...aren't. :) so go count from index to pinky your january february march april may june july, and once you run out, go back to the index finger peak.

    i think i managed to make that sound over-complicated, but i promise it's ever so easy. hope that made sense!

    Day 71? I can never remember the little rhyme for the 31 and 30 day months so im guessing here. Anyways...i have time before my soccer match. Red spots are gay...period. Had 3 little bumps come up...healing nicely. Looks like ill be content for prom! Will def. have to take some cream and leave it in the car so i can go out and put some on about half way through :-p. Well it's off to dominate some soccer :) Pics tomorrow.

    and you must tell us how prom went. juicy details and the works.

  10. hey chels! mm just wondering if you've had the heads up on all the good stuff that you should stock up on during your accutane course? just in case, many on this board are currently using:

    Aquaphor (by Eucerin, for the lips)

    Head n Shoulders (in case your scalp dries out too)

    facial moisturizer of course

    Visene (eyes may start becoming irritated)

    Vaseline or some other intensive body lotion

    o and watch that cholesterol and drink plenty of water.

    completely up to you, but you could ask your derm about antibiotics, since your acne may be rather inflamatory in the beginning (and then you could ween off). i'm doing this to prevent the initial breakout, but ran out recently (and bam i break out of course, though i'll be getting a refill). your a beautiful girl, and i sincerely hope you know that! i must add...it's so great that your taking yoga...i'll be starting some classes soon too i hope. i felt free and light as a butterfly when i used to do yoga. so it was good to hear because i'm sure it'll be helping you too.

  11. something i wanted to document in my log:

    quite a few teensy pustules showed up today, with a good number on my forehead. when i go to the derm next week, i'll ask for antibiotics. i'm so terrified of breaking out because it takes an unbelievable amount of time for my fair skin to heal. not like one of those people who can get a zit and have the mark heal within days or weeks. but lucky me...it can take months.

    o well, tons of family came over and i laughed myself silly. good times, good times.

    btw, Day 6

  12. you my dear could very well be the next saint. in all seriousness...whoa. :comfort:

    but really i never knew of anyone who would willingly choose indescribable, unfathomable pain. someone who could be so insightful as to see the benefits to be reaped at the end of an arduous road. wow. i mean can you comprehend how...well...super-human that is? it completely blows my mind. never in my life have i thought about choosing acne or any other means toward humility, but rather thought of being grateful for it. but to choose it is a revolutionary thought, and i need to look into this more; it's fascinating to me. haha i'm making you sound like a test subject.

    i adored the poem too. i was reading this, thinking oo there's going to be a good punch line (if you will) at the end, i can feel it. and sure enough, there was and i was aww-ing. i too used to think i was abandoned by Him during my worst moments, and only recently realized that there was purpose, and more importantly, company, during these times. i came so close to quitting so so many things like religion, school, even life at times (which is why i can absolutely understand suicidal issues), but hey that's a closed chapter and i'm -and you- are not going back. no sir. bigger better people, that's what i'll be drinking to.

  13. i'm jealous too, that you're so far along. i want a fast-forward button!

    by all means add me onto that list of people being too nice to you. i shall call it: Operation Overinflate Tyler's Ego. by the time we're done with you- or should i say accutane is done with you- i expect a smashing success.

  14. Day 5

    let me see let me see...

    nothing monumental has been happening, although i have had a few baby spots come up. but nothing like before, without all the nastiness of pus or inflamation. yum. so i expect that these lovely doves should be flying off soon. i suppose i could be drier than normal, but then again we've had some non-los angeles weather in that it's been freakishly chilly. what gets to me is that my complexion would be quite nice actually if i weren't still bruised from that laser treatment i had before starting. the only conclusion i've come to is that i have the slowest healing rate among mankind, because the physician assitant was dumbfounded when i told her i have some residual bruising left. she said to give it a couple more weeks. gah.

    i have a new coping mechanism that is simply brilliant. i call it: singing! iunno i just sing to my heart's delight and like magic i know it's all going to be okay.

    currently daydreaming of sundresses and road trips, beaches and lunches, and worry-free days. mm mm mm.

  15. :doh: Sorry it took me a while to reply- the name is called Revitalash. I wish I had taken before and after pictures, because the results have been amazing for me, even though I was skeptical in the beginning. But I trusted my dermatologist when she recommended it (because she's a doctor and not some sales clerk working on commission), especially when I saw the Physician Assitant's before and after pictures. Her lashes are just stunning. You can order off their website, certain doctor's offices, and certain beauty stores. Anyway you could do a search and check out reviews and/or photos for yourself to see if you're interested. I hope this helps, and that all will be well with any hair loss concerns!


  16. well every dermatologist out there warns against unprotected sun exposure like the plague, and even more so during an accutane course. every time i go for a visit, (i've been to like four in the beverly hills/hollywood area recently to ensure quality care), they always ask me if i have sunscreen on before i leave, like i'll melt or something if i don't. BUT, i've read on here of people who react really well to sun exposure, though i find that these are the people who tan as opposed to burn. do you tend to tan or burn? from personal experience, after tanning in my backyard as an attempt to get rid of the red marks, they turned brown! dermatologists have told me it's easier to treat redness than brown (and boy was it true).

    if you care about how healthy your skin will be a decade or so from now, i would tell you to please avoid sun exposure as it causes the skin to lose collagen, and can lead to premature aging, discoloration, melasma, skin cancer, etc. ultimately, it's completely up to you, and i just hope my two cents helped a bit.

  17. thanks Tyler for the support. your name is so...quaint, like an ideal american name. :angel:

    Day 3

    update: well, not much to update! i'm only three days in, and even if small things kick in, i'm not the type to blame accutane for everything. my lips have been dry and my hands have been cracky long before i started (i think my washing is borderline obsessive), so i'm cutting that down.

    still need to go accutane grocery shopping! it feels like so much is going on in my life, and yet so little. like all the meat is missing, and substituted with the small scattered bits of chopped vegetables that were supposed to add some flavor. bad metaphor. i had put my life on hold, and now it's time to pick it back up. besides, no one likes to be put on hold. :/

  18. o and one more bit to add to that novel above (ha sorry it's friggin long), restoration treatments DO work. BUT, the key is finding the right treatment for your skin, otherwise, you could cause damage, go about in circles, receive little to no results, etc. most of that good stuff should be done well after your course though, as i'm sure you know.

    heads up: i am currently having treatments done for post-acne redness. i just thought i might mention that to give you some hope/comfort. i go in next week for the v-beam laser. no worries though, since it's non-ablative (i.e. works beneath the skin without causing damage to the surface like burning, cutting, etc.). and let me tell you, it's the only thing that has been effective, and i'm in love love love with it. so there, chin up my dear.

  19. haha you bet! AA here i come. makes me think of alcoholics anonymous, or better yet, acne annonymous. since spandex is taken, i'll be rockin some knee-high socks, 70s short shorts, and of course, that headband thingy. sexy...

    i hear you about asking god for strength. call me silly, but to this day, i can't help but wish upon a star, and pray the same prayers. i questioned why it was that i had suffered, or why good people in the world suffer, and overfed ignorant fools roam about without the taint of pain. i thought if he actually chose who suffers and who does not, and if so, why, and why not all. i wondered if didn't hear me, or worse, if he heard me and chose to ignore. i thought, maybe i'm just a silly girl pulling God into man's affairs. most likely that might be the case.

    if you're at all where i am, in managing to maintain an upbeat attitude about this accutane trip, but get moments of complete weakness and worry, well maybe this might help. i stumbled across it in philosophy class and was whoa-ed away:

    Seneca, a philosopher said, "So god hardens and scrutinizes and exercises those he approves and loves; but those he appears to indulge and spare he is only keeping tender for disasters to come. If you suppose anyone is immune, you are mistaken...Why does god afflict every good man with sickness or grief or misfortune? Because in the army, too, the most hazardous duties are assigned to the bravest soldiers...In the case of good men, accordingly, the gods follow the plan that teachers follow with their pupils; they demand more effort from those in whom they have confident expectations...What wonder, then if god tries noble spirits with sternness? The demonstration of courage can never be gentle. Fortune scourges us; we must endure it. It is not cruelty but a contest." well i found that profoundly useful in shining light while i was groping in the dark. it made sense enough. don't get me wrong, i'm no bible hugger, but i believe in something bigger than myself. if it all be a lovely illusion, give me my illusion, as it has given me, and mankind, a humbled life and virtuous qualities. a compass and a conscience outside of our faltering conscience. ok i'm not usually this philosophic... :shifty:

  20. hey there dust in the wind! me o my i'm completely understand your mini heart attack. i was on accutane a while back but never finished my course (because i missed the window apparently with Ipledge). when my derm wanted to put me back, i declined due to some hair loss that scared me to death (and after showing my mom, it scared me even more to see how scared she was!) ha long story short, i'm better prepared this time and hope i have some helpful words to offer.

    first off, i'll be taking fish oil (also recommended by many dermatologists for accutaners) to combat dryness inside out. my dose was lowered to 40 mg, because evidently my body was shocked with such a high dose last time (which caused the hair to go into a 'resting' phase, after which it shed). please refrain from over-washing your hair, get yourself a good deep-conditioner (some on this board even incorporate a leave-in conditioner), and well, pamper yourself. oh and my goodness, i bought myself a god-send of a product that made my lashes grow luxuriously long! it's pricey, but if your interested just ask me and i'll give you some info. i don't want to sound like i'm selling a product or anything... but i think if you express your genuine concern your derm will lower your dose and all will be well. if it's of any comfort, i found out (from my derm and from extensive research) that it's normal for a person on accutane to experience hair loss (200-300 hairs a day if it does indeed get to that point) and yes even eye lashes. i hope this helped in some small way...