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UnacceptedRealist

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Everything posted by UnacceptedRealist

  1. Honestly, I'd probably be willing to give up everything passed 40. So, assuming a fairly average lifespan, like 38 years or so.
  2. Yes, but not toward people who had nothing to do with my suffering. Seeing people enjoy life doesn't bother me. I can honestly say, though, that I doubt I'll ever experience true happiness again. It's just not who I am anymore.
  3. I'm certainly not religious, but I can't help but think that there's no reason why a "god" has to be benevolent. In fact, IMO, the options are that there's no god or that there is a god and it's evil. I'm not sure that acne should count as evidence either way, though.
  4. Coming from someone with scarring as severe as I've ever seen, I'd support this for the sake of others -- but I wouldn't personally want anything to do with it. I've never used anti-anxiety medication and, quite frankly, I don't care what other people think of me. I think it's important to acknowledge that, while we're certainly at a disadvantage in many regards, we ultimately decide how acne/scarring impacts our lives. And I've found that there's no better remedy for acne's social implicat
  5. I'm not really sure how to phrase this question most appropriately; I've had a number of well-intentioned discussions with people IRL about it and they usually get offended/defensive pretty quick (I've actually been asked to leave a church-based counseling session). So, to be clear, I don't mean to offend anyone; I'm just genuinely curious: Why is parenthood considered such an inalienable right? In other words, why is it considered so unreasonable to question the fitness of potential paren
  6. To be honest, if I were in your position, I likely would not have pursued a relationship in the first place. However, now that you've made that decision, it's no longer simply about what you want or feel you need -- you need to base decisions on "what's best for us?" Hence, I think you should definitely not "just go ahead and do it." In my opinion, it would be much more responsible to talk to your significant other about how you're feeling. Then, with consideration for her feelings on the matte
  7. Well, although I have nothing against positivity, I think it's important not to generalize the effects of acne. For many, there's no hope for a day when they're "finally clear," as they've already been left with scarring (which can be quite severe). So, while I agree that most people will be different post-acne, I don't think the positive-to-negative change ratio is always in their favor.
  8. I doubt your new civilization would be any different. The issue isn't that people think acne is a "contagious cancer"; it's that acne is a skin issue -- in other words, it's an objectively unappealing trait. For this reason, I don't think most people need to "learn" anything; they're already correct: people with acne are, to some extent, aesthetically unappealing.
  9. Quite simply, because "society" doesn't understand it. Generally speaking, people only care about things they've been forced to understand through personal experience. And, to be honest, I think this site is a great example of this -- people often use their own experience with acne as a basis for their overall opinion about it. They're quick to demean acne by either comparing it to more "serious" conditions or by offering simple means of treating it. Around here you may not hear things like
  10. Well, considering I've never been in a relationship, I'll take your word for anything relationship-related. As for my skin limiting what I can do, that's not necessarily what I meant. I'm sure it doesn't help my career aspirations, but what I meant was, actually, who I become -- not what I do. My scarring is severe enough that it is very noticeable and I can attempt to hide it (which I don't see myself doing...), but realistically I can't rid myself of it. That's tough for me because I have
  11. You're right and I didn't mean to imply that I thought everyone (or anyone, for that matter) shared my views.
  12. Thanks for the kind words. I'd rather not detail exactly what I don't like about my appearance; but, basically, I have acne and relatively severe acne scarring. Also, I don't think my skin completely characterizes who I am, but it certainly limits who I can become. It's just reality, appearances matter to most people (myself included) and there's just not much I can do about what I look like. I guess, honestly, I don't want to be happy just to be happy. I'm not happy about how I look; I'll
  13. In theory, I agree -- being positive is usually a good thing. But, in reality, I just can't convince myself that it's practical; it's extremely difficult for me to be genuinely positive about my appearance because I'm constantly reminded of what I really look like (and trust me, I don't have 'moderate' acne) -- be it mirrors or talking to people who can't make eye contact. I have, however, tried to circumvent this issue by improving areas of my appearance that I can control, and, to some exten
  14. I think you're right. I lack the willingness to view myself more favorably than I would someone else in my situation (or, as you put it, coping mechanisms). That said, functioning on a day-to-day basis is not a struggle for me, and I don't think I need to boost my sense of self-worth. This, I think, is because my "low self-esteem" is confined to a specific component of my life -- intimate relationships. I don't suffer from an overall lack of self-confidence or an inability to discern my weak
  15. I appreciate all the thoughtful replies, guys. And I partially agree with the consensus; specifically, I do think that my self-esteem is 'low' (or at least lower than usual...), but I don't think I suffer from a "self-esteem issue." I guess it depends on your definition of an 'issue', but, in my opinion, my self-esteem -- or lack thereof -- is appropriate. It's the acne, and the other of acne-related ailments, that are the issue. And in my case, many of those issues aren't going anywhere (I
  16. During my time lurking on this forum, I've noticed that one of the more common complaints is that 'society' does not accept those who suffer from acne. I've especially seen this sentiment implied through threads concerning social activities -- specifically, meaningful relationships. For instance, although I assume most people here suffer from acne, it seems like the majority are either in a relationship or striving to be in one. And the acne, if an issue at all, is something that bothers othe
  17. I respect your right to an opinion, but I completely disagree. I mean, sure, third-degree burns are going to be more severe than the typical case of acne; but, still, I don't see the logic behind attempting to trivialize acne. All cases of acne are not created equal and, although acne is more treatable than some diseases, it's not always easily treated. Moreover, I can personally attest to the fact that can negatively impact your ability to get a job -- either by directly hurting your appeara
  18. I hardly think asking people to consider both the typical and the not-so-typical before attacking someone's rationale is being "nit-picky." Moreover, I'm clearly not demonstrating complexity---I'm merely stating the obvious. However, you seem to be unable to move away from all-inclusive labels such as "any." And arguments based on such are rarely---if ever---going to be correct. Furthermore, only because of my great respect for cancer, I shall attempt to clarify my statements again. I'm no
  19. Gawk-worthy? I don't think anything I've said is "gawk-worthy." In fact, very little of what I've said is even an opinion---it's fact. But, alas, I guess you're happier in your simplified and overly generalized world. Keep it positive, bro.
  20. To clarify: I don't think any amount of personal experience with acne is enough to discredit someone's personal feelings---even if they seem "extreme" to you. This, however, doesn't mean you can't give advice or have a "mutual understanding." But in the case of labeling people as irrational or on the verge of institutionalization, I don't think personal experience is ever enough. aanabill, 1.) I, personally, don't believe there is a "basic psychological effect." 2.) With regards to the "
  21. Well, I have to say, I'm impressed. I didn't think you could top the asininity of your previous posts, but you've manage to do just that. With that said, however, I suppose I will humor you with a response. Let's start here: Based on your behavior, I'm assuming this "approach" involves name-calling and an, overall, argumentative posting style, right? And you call me delusional... Now, on to this: This, right here, is what I take the most issue with. I understand that you had (have?)
  22. mrnegative, I know I've already shared my opinion, but I feel compelled to respond again. Why? Let me explain: You ended your first post---which was about there being too much negativity---by asking for our opinion; then, after reading various opinions, you responded by accusing those who shared of being delusional, irrational, insecure and having "inner issues." You've insinuated that some responses were immature; you've called posts banal. Yet, through all of that, you maint
  23. I'm not sure I understand the premise of your thread. Is it not natural, and appropriate, for a sub-forum titled "emotional and psychological effects of acne" to contain negatively titled topics? What did you expect? Also, although many of the topics in this section are negatively titled, I've found that many of the responses are the complete opposite---they promote a much more positive outlook. Basically, I think it's a bit silly to come to this sub-forum and expect "positively" titl
  24. For me, school is one of the few things that acne has not negatively affected. This, however, isn't because I find it easy to not focus on my skin; rather, I view schooling as a necessary 'means to an end.' I mean, seriously, what is the alternative? Having severe acne, being uneducated and financially dependent? No thanks.
  25. Well, due to its diverse nature, it’s practically impossible to come to a definitive and widely applicable conclusion about anything acne-related. Hence the cause of acne should be evaluated on a case-by-case basis. With that said, however, I don’t believe acne is, in and of itself, a mental illness-- or a pure psychosomatic disease. More than likely, confounding variables are responsible for most seemingly direct correlations. Also, with regards to the above poster, it seems rather nonsensi
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