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hotburrito last won the day on December 9 2011

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  1. I vow to stop over-treating my face. I'm actually pretty sure I heal best when I leave my skin alone, but it's so hard to genuinely make myself believe that because I want to think I can control the process
  2. I get so weirdly relieved. The other day I was doing some last minute shopping, and I noticed that all the sales girls except one had visible acne/scarring even *with* makeup on. And you know what? They were all gorgeous. It wasn't even a "oh, that girl is pretty even though she has acne" thing, it was more of a "oh look at that pretty girl - oh wait she has a few pimples!" type epiphany. So yeah, that cheered me up a lot
  3. Chiming in on the "you aren't alone" part. I do go out in public because, well, I have to - I have a job and social obligations - but I spend most of my time outdoors wishing I could run back home and hide, so I completely empathize.
  4. This on the other hand I can understand completely I'm sorry. I feel the same way. 90% of the time I force myself to be positive, but holy fuck staying positive is exhausting sometimes. I'm no longer as depressed as I was on Accutane, but I still spend a lot of time just crying myself to sleep and then feeling even more awful about it because I hate that I'm such a shallow/insecure/superficial person deep down after all.
  5. Perhaps it's a regional thing. I've never seen anybody with bad skin and automatically thought "trashy" - that's a judgement I usually reserve for... well, particularly questionably-dressed or foul-mouthed people. That guy was a douchebag, how did you not throw something in his face. As for being told that you're not/no longer pretty being the worst thing somebody can say to a person with acne - I guess we differ on that front. It's taken me a while, but for now at least I can just shrug and go
  6. ...are you sure you're not just being paranoid? I mean, the paranoia is totally understandable given your dad's really offensive and ignorant statements, but I've never had anybody treat me like I was "trashy" or actually dirty because of my acne. Most people just coo pityingly at me and go "oh my god, that's so sad, you used to be so pretty!" (Which... thanks.) Strangers basically just treat me like they always have. Except I think they do more of a double-take when they see me first, but t
  7. Hah, I used this stuff ONCE (same concentration) and broke out in hives all over - the hives have subsided now but my face is peeling all over as well, and it really is very embarrassing. I honestly just stopped using it once I... well, broke out in hives (pretty sure that's an allergic reaction right there), but is it possible you're using too high a concentration? I'm not sure what you can do about the peeling/flakiness except not to pull at your skin flaps, which will probably just slow down
  8. We're happy to help! But just out of curiosity, why are you afraid to open up to your boyfriend - because you suspect he might not like what he finds? Sort of. I have cultivated an image of someone that is emotionally indestructible. But he knows me better than that. He knows I'm human. What he doesn't know is that there is so much I hate about how I look. I don't really want to draw attention to any of those things by talking about it. Nor do I want to make him aware so that he won't make any w
  9. We're happy to help! But just out of curiosity, why are you afraid to open up to your boyfriend - because you suspect he might not like what he finds?
  10. You probably already know this, but you have a body type a lot of women would probably literally kill for (and one I am afraid at least some women have probably died for). Which is not to say that you wanting a different body type is illegitimate or whatever because everybody has different wants and needs, but still. It sort of reminds me of that thing where if you're curly-haired and go to the salon to get your hair done for an event or whatever, they often straighten it... and if you're straig
  11. What about the people who can't afford/experience extremely troubling side effects on Accutane then? if you cant afford it then get a job. if you cant deal with the side effects or something wrong is going on with use than i dont know, figure it out. and dont give me this "well my acne keeps me from working because my self esteem is low" BS because i got a job as a dam host with acne so i could afford it. It's harder for some people to find jobs than others, and not everybody is lucky enough t
  12. Ugh, I am so sorry to hear that. I think the emotional scars people develop during their formative years are often impossible to completely get rid of. I was popular in grade school, but that's had its own set of drawbacks - rest assured that the popular kids probably hated themselves for every tiny perceived flaw/imperfection that they picked on everybody else for and that their need for "perfection" often ends up carrying on to their adult lives... rendering them far more miserable in the long
  13. This is really sad I wish I could offer you some advice to help, but I don't know what exactly would work. It sucks when feelings refuse to follow reason, but that doesn't make them any less "legitimate" - sometimes feelings are just... feelings and you can't control them no matter how irrational they seem. Can you maybe go to your boyfriend and try to tell him this? "I know it doesn't make any sense, but you just caught me applying BP and now I feel really embarrassed even though I know you've
  14. What the hell, I would've gone over there to punch him in the face for that, how were you even friends with this person. "Yeah, it's either me or Bloody Harry over there, thanks." (I was not a very peaceful person back in Grade 7. I once turned a water hose on a dude because he refused to get out of my seat... in the middle of class.) it was seventh grade! i cried that day when i got home, and my friend apologized to me the next day, and i didnt have many friends so i forgave him, he wasn't
  15. I'm sort of confused as to why this might be mortifying. Do you mind explaining?