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mikeryanrebecca

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About mikeryanrebecca

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  1. Somehow I pulled off one of the most beautiful girls that I have ever met. Physically, she is almost flawless: nice skin, amazing body, etc. She is also perfect for me personality-wise. She always wants to see me and lay with me, etc. Sometimes, my skin is looking okay so we hang out and have some of the greatest times together. But then there are those days when my skin just looks atrocious (today is one of those days) and there is no way I can let her see me. For instance, these last couple of
  2. Seriously, I am sooo screwed right now. My roommates and I are having a party tonight and I invited everybody I know. I have been secretly going tanning (I am a guy), and I went twice. I think I misused the goggles this time because these are seriously the biggest pale circles I have ever seen! So my skin is pretty burnt, and a large area around my eyes is completely white. I am in a complete state of panic right now and every time I look it gets worse. I feel like I am going to puke, because I
  3. People must think that I am a lunatic. When I am in a social setting and it is nice and dark, I can talk to people without a problem, crack jokes, get girls' phone numbers, the whole deal. But if I see them on the street the next day, I avoid them at all costs and just pray that they don't walk next to me. The reason: I know that they can see all of my scars, marks, pimples, etc. when it is bright outside. THAT IS THE ONLY REASON! I feel so terrible right now because there's a girl, whom I thoug
  4. It's tough to admit it, but those last two posts definitely hit home for me. I pretty much disconnected from the world and became completely absorbed in my own thoughts. It seems selfish, but it is the way that I coped with having acne for so long. Even though it is pretty much gone now, I am completely obsessed with my physical appearance. For instance, today at work I snuck off to the bathroom and took off my shirt just to check on my body. The acne experience has made me obsessed with all thi
  5. I have a huge problem with connecting with people. I constantly feel like I am cut off, and in my own world. Even when I talk to people, the conversations are empty, rushed, and meaningless. My personality is just bland, and even though I realize it, I can't bring myself to change it. I guess going through acne all these years, I just dealt with it by cutting myself off from people so I don't have to worry about what they think or say. But even though my face looks better these days, I can't get
  6. 1) How bad would you rate you acne out of 10? : It varies a lot, but right now- 2 (counting scars/marks- 7) 2) How long have you sufferd with acne?: about 5 years of hell 3) Are you takeing any medication? ( and what? ): Differin and antidepressants 4) How old are you? 19 5) Whats the worse thing someone has said about you acne and who said it? "You have the most disgusting acne face. My friends used to think you were so cute but now they think you're gross" - my older sister when I was a
  7. Probably my 6th grade year. For some reason I was a jock that year. I got one of the MVP awards for football, started for basketball, and got the game ball for our championship game for baseball. I was also the funniest kid in the class, but was always getting into trouble. Actually, I almost got kicked out of school that year and my teacher left after only half a year, most likely in large part because of me (I feel kind of bad for that now). People from my grade school still bring up memories
  8. I constantly avoid going places. People are always telling me that I have to come out with them on the weekends, and while I tell myself that I want to, when the moment comes and they ask me I instictively react by thinking up an excuse so I don't have to go.
  9. haha i dont think that it's showing off at all because no matter what i'm always going to have these scars and marks from the acne so i have a long way to go to even be a 7 anyway.
  10. The thing that is so frustrating is that with acne is one day you can look fine and be like a 7, and the next day you can get a huge breakout and be a 3. There is absolutely no consistency to the way I look. And it really blows.
  11. Yea I'm a loner these days. I've been on a slippery slope since my freshman year of high school, and I've been getting more and more reclusive every year. I now spend most of my time in my dorm room, just sitting around, or I go to the gym. I don't even like going anywhere, not even the bathroom because I don't want to pass by anybody. My day usually consists of: sleep, eat, gym, class, sit for hours, nap, sit, sleep. I have a few friends, and we are all sick of each other and just wish we could
  12. If you had to rate yourself how you look out of 10, first WITH acne, then if you had no acne, what would you rate yourself? How much has acne brought you down lookswise? I'd say that with acne, I'm probably about a 5 out of 10. If I never got acne, I think I'd be a 7-8 out of 10. So acne has brought me down significantly lookswise, and I think that is part of what eats me up inside. Had I never gotten acne, I would look pretty good.
  13. I hate when I can feel pimples forming under the skin before I go out or go to class. Then when I get back, I look in the mirror and see that they are now in full bloom and/or have turned into shiny whiteheads. The worst part is wondering how long they have been this way and being paranoid about going to class or out in the future when you feel them forming.
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