1. Last Week
  2. Quote

    I have been suffering from severe acne scars for almost all my life and it is influencing my life so fking negatively. Trust me, my scars are severe as fk.. I think this extreme stress caused me to develop some kind of psychosis.. I get so freaking obsessed on my skins that, for past 2 years, I have been taking at least 20 pictures of my face every fking day.. literally every day.. I have over 10,000 pictures of my acne scars.. not even joking LOL

    !I can totally agree with you - I'm obsessed too. I'm afraid of wind that it will bring me a new scar.I was thinking that I will just live like a zombie and the then die. However, my boyfriend does technically everything to see me, so if I tell him my face burns and I will stay at home, he says that is ok and he will come and brings me everything that I want and he is absolutely happy with that. So please, don't stop believing that some miracle/interest/happy things in your life can happen. My miracle to all kind of pimples, acne, active acne, cystic acne is duac-gel: little layer at night - nothing else ever helped me more - but there is a risk for using this product for a long time. But I used to popping pimples and that is why I have scars, redness, thin skin, wholes, etc. now. Totally agree, sometimes we must be stronger for those who really care about us. For e.g. I have to be strong enough to not show my weaknesses to my sister and make her happy. If you feel comfortable at home stay at home - for now, I regularly turn off my phone and social app for a weekend because I realized that real friends don't ask you out only for drinking on Friday night and they should at least ask you how are you in the week. All we want is quite nice skin without holes pimples scars and hurting comments from people. However,  hurt self the most by our thoughts is the worst. We are not alone even we are from a different "world" :)
    Maybe we keep continue together and waiting for new medicaments and treatments.

    Thank you so much all of you for the posts:). It is pity that I don't know anybody who can tell me "YES the laser, filler really help with my scar and with red marks" :( 


     
  3. To floridagirl1991
    I'm sorry what your husband did to you. There is no excuse for this. I think you deserve also love and be happy - at least three hour per day. You should think differently about yourself - so far you've been so strong that you continue to live till today and I'm very happy that you could write to me your pain, your feelings, your opinions. Believe me, he is the only guy who gets me on the date after 5 years - so don't hurry, you can find someone or something that makes you feel more comfortable about thoughts. I don't think you should be around this kind of people - its must hurts. However, as mickidepaname said: So don't take life too seriously, nothing is that important. Your body is temporary, your skin is temporary that does to me more sense than pleased everyone. If somebody loves you - then he will take your life-conditions even if you have to wear a mask or bag inside your house. 
    I damage my health by anorexia, bulimia, lots of depression pills, I'm feeling that my body is dying - all my part of the body have something wrong (dandruff on the head, stretch marks) and that is why I get angry and don't want to see anyone and be happy at my home with my mirrors and my routine. I was strong enough to stop being bulimic or stop hurting myself and get very well paid job....but I'm not strong enough to see my reflections for now. But nothing has ruined my health as overthinking, trying to please everyone and being harsh on myself.

    To mickidepaname

    Quote

    It's people with who, for different reasons, you feel "not enough".

    Run away from those people.

    It may even be family members.
    Some people (like I said, without even wanting it) make you feel like crap.

    While now I enjoy calms, empathetic persons, I feel comfortable with.

     
    Hm, that is absolutely true - I just need to run away from those kinds of people. It is hard to live with my family because I'm not smiling and I am not being supported, look always angry and don't speak and that is not what my family deserve. Last party I must run home because my super friend - cute girl came and she has totally awesome skin like peach and super cute eyes - it is strange that human is strong enough to fight for love or "play hardball", be strong enough to live with insomnia, arrhythmia but not strong enough to look at some girl that drinks all the time, smokes everything, eats junky foods and she is sexy as fuck in her face - it is maybe quite funny:D I'm really like reading your "strong" posts and don't feel so bad that I'm can't live dreamy life.
  4. Thank you so much!
    (I don't see any mistakes because I am not en-national speaker ^^ )

    You give me a new point of view - I mean in life - you have totally right! It is terrible and it is a disease.
    I don't know anybody who has this kind of problem and my friend don't understand why I won't go out or drink with them. I don't know how is our skin condition is but I could feel your pain in the text.

    I agree, my family told me many times "I don't see your problem, it really burns?" or "Eat everything and don't use so much product and you will be fine." FINE? Fine will it be if the scars disappear during the night and I will be capable at least go the to swimming pool or two-days trip.

    How I will stop feeling guilty or blaming myself for lying to my friends or keep telling them that I don't have time?
    (Of course, where I am going out I am happy and drinks lots of alcohol but the next day I get anxiety about everything and feel that my face is getting worse), actually, I love two friends (others toxic friends want me only as drink partner or using me for lent money) but I have anxiety, depression and overthinking about the whole world and I have the feeling that everybody hates me and they know I am laying and after this thoughts I feel guilty and at the end of whole thinking process feel angry - all I want that everybody don't call me anymore. And this is happening every day. It would definitely help me be more selfish and don't think about others.

    I agree and started to not compare so much to others. I'm really happy and glad that you are helping others and exists in this world:)

    Is something (hobby, doing regularly, books) except medication, pills, cream and dermatologists that you've found helpful?

    Thank you ^^!

  5. Last Month
  6. I know how you feel, each of the day I think about suicide because of scars, redness ugly marks and the texture of my skin at all. I've cried in public tram like an idiot in the morning.
    However, something helped me.

    1. Duacgel applied for a night - helped me with all kind of acne, new, big, cystic, pimples but is on prescription. But it is really necessary to avoid the sun and go out with SPF50.
    2. blood-test for estrogen - result basically show that at the age of 22 I am in menopause - and that was why my skin is burning all day and has a problem with acne - even I have anticonception for 9 years. Tell your doctor that you want to know if you have low estrogen. And then they give your hormone as they should be.
    3. avoid all kind of soy products and people who tell you that you need a detoxication - bullshit! They mentally destroyed me with all this alternative help - they keep saying that I have bacterias and tapeworms, and only helps is eat all their super healthy products. 
    4. Some pills for sleep and stress - the stress and overthinking give me more pimples than touching my face
  7. Hello, little fighter
    thank you so much for your answer.
    I know, its really sucks when we're young and totally depressed by life and quotes "you should enjoy all party, events, traveling, holidays, fuck-whatever".
    I've been the programmer too but still, I had have to work in the office - and my colleagues still creating some teambuilding and I hadn't known what to say. I have a new job but still, have to go to the office but it is a little much better.

    I really try our advice. I am also talented in music instruments or painting but I can't find any inspiration and motivation why I have to paint my pain, angry - nobody cares. I don't have any "muse":( 

    When you see TV and lots of good-looking people who achieve their dreams and tell the shits like "Everything is possible If you want". With my people around I've become a perfect liar - in a second I can create super excuse why I can't go out then I start thinking that they don't like me and gossiping me and that makes me angry and paranoic.

    I love talking about life stuff and overthinking with my boyfriend but he has a terrible light in bathroom - always when I am washing my face and look into the mirror the only thought is "I had to get drunk and die"

    I know, we probably just keep going with all pain and thoughts. Thanks for your post - it really helps.

  8. This is my final phase when I can not go any further. I decided to write how the fucking scars destroyed my whole life and I don't know how to fix it. I have a perfect boyfriend, he really loves me and I told him about my thoughts - he is my last shining star in this world but I can't bother him every day with this stuff.
    I do not know how to sum it up in the beginning, I've had my health under puberty. Diets, obesity, anorexia - all these impact me. Until then, I had the smoothest most delicate skin. I didn't have to wash my face for three days, going under the tents for a week without makeup - I had hardly ever used face-cream. Then came university and my acne rolled across my face. Three years of pain, crying, ugliness and hiding my face under my hair have affected me in mentally a lot. Now acne is gone, but the scars left.
    All day my face burning. I've had red deep scars on my cheeks that still hurts, some brown spots and few pimples. My day starts by waking up and start thinking when I  to wondering if I have a new scar or if my old scars have are larger or more redness. After the courage to look into the mirror (without turning the light on), I will decide whether I will be strong enough to do my hobbies or work or text my friends or If I rather kill myself and turn off my social apps, phone, and wish that everyone will forget me.
    I was wondering how life would be beautiful if I could enjoy
    all nights with my boyfriend, taken him to some cities in Europe and stay there for a weekend without calculating when and what of the cream or makeup I need. Enjoy events with friends (most of them I've lost already) or don't be afraid of going to the bathroom where the mirrors are, take my family to the sea or some beautiful trips, play tennis, go skiing, go swimming.

    I have hard work in sense of thinking, and I  instead of paying attention I'm thinking about my reflection with the wholes on my cheeks and rednesses on the computer, phone, spoons...

    I have tried laser, acid fills, needle sticking, advice from youtube channels, I've tried all expensive cosmetics that exist and promise a miracle, I have 4 dermatologists and everyone saying me something else. All this process ruined my skin totally. Especially the peroxide that have helped me with cystic acne but caused my skin thinner and super sensitive forever. New blood test-result indicate that I have very low estrogen and MAYBE that information could help doctors and my “burning face” will go away but scars not - I know

    I used to be so beautiful, sexy, so good, helped everyone, ...I have changed - I am mean, angry and wish that everyone with perfect skin will die - I am a monster. I am so exhausted by the whole day thinking about my skin and creating embarrassing excuses so I don't have to go out.

    I live only for my sibling and the parents and I want to secure them in the future. But where I find the power to still continue all next days. I know what a silly problem - everyone has problems, someone doesn't have the leg, someone doesn't have a family - I know, shame on me but don't blame me. I've just needed to figure out how to get used to it - probably.

    Is there anyone who was fighting with similar and has some advice on how to continue and stay like a winner?

    Thanks little fighter