About this blog

20 year old who had acne when younger but it came flooding back and ruined my perfect skin and very happy lifestyle

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Week 4

Have got quite a bit better recently, under normal lighting my skin looks alot better, but at some angles / lighting you can see some general redness (hyper pigmentation), peeling of skin and 2 or 3 dark brown spots. I have one or two scars which are only noticable when im right up to the mirror, this is a relief as i thought scarring could have been a big issue.

So 4 weeks on the drug. I was very unhappy a month ago, before i started accutane, what you would call depressed. Now im not depressed, but im still living a little like a hermit crab.

My ex gf wants to have lunch, but i told her about me taking this drug and told her i didnt want to see anyone atm. There is quite a big issue in my head here. As it stands i dont think i want to get back with her, but i would not say i definately wouldnt. However in the last 2 months i feel she would not want to get back with me because of my skin.

I am hoping that i will be the best mentally and physically ive ever been in 6 weeks time when i return to uni. At the rate things are going this is definately a possiblity, fingers crossed i can be even better than before my skin got bad again and this time i will have no insecurities because my excesive sweating is over. I will be better than normal because i will feel such freedom from getting rid of 2 ridiculously embarrasing conditions.


3 weeks of accutane

Ok so ive been on accutane for 3 weeks now. 2 weeks at 20mg and 1 week at 60 mg.

My acne got alot worse a few weeks before i got accutane prescribed, i sort of had a massive breakout before accutane which was soul destroying as it had almost cleared up untill one morning i got a few pimples then that next week the number and size of the pimples increased drastically.

I should be happy because my acne is improving but at the same time im quite worried because since i had that soul destroying breakout, i stopped going to the gym just because i couldnt stand the thought of people looking. Also i have avoided any social interactions with people for the last month almost. So skin aside i just havent bothered to take care of myself, so even though my skin is getting better, im losing muscle and my hair is looking increasingly rubbish too.

I need to sort myself out but i want to wait till my skin improves some more before i go back to the gym because staying fit and healthy is something i used to enjoy. I dont want to go into it unless im 100% comfortable/commited to being able to feel confident enough to keep going day after day.

Im sort of overthinking this but when i get back to my former self i want to have learned something from this very hard time in my life. Surely i have to take something away from these horrible last few months. I hope il come out from this experience with more than just my clear skin back.......

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