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Scared, Nervous and maybe Excited

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Jean23

seriously?

what the fuck. the first three weeks of accutane i thought i thought life was too good to be true. Here I am, about a month in and having a breakout that feels worse than ever since I had been what felt like almost pimple free. I hope that this is related to my period... To be honest though, I don't think it is....I feel like my blackheads are all surfacing, and I am getting tiny bumps under the skin, that could either turn into pimples or go away, I can't tell. I think I got a little overconfident in the first three weeks because my side effects were so minimal and the results amazing... Maybe I just need to catch up on my sleep and stress less... writing a blog at 2am probably isn't the healthiest thing either. Ughhhh here's hoping that I get through the week without an eruption and simultaneously get all my schoolwork done and ace this semester.

xo

Jean23

Week One

One week in!

So the first two days i thought my skin was magically getting better...maybe placebo effect? haha, no but really, I did not wake up with any blemishes. Around day three I got two whiteheads, which since have gone down... I have a few pimples around my chin that are hanging on, and what seems like another coming on the side of my face... I think I might be hitting an initial breakout... But, the acne on my back seems to be slowly clearing up. ...I don't want to jinx myself...but so far, side effects are minimal and extremely tolerable, better than when I was on Retin A.... Here's hoping things stay going well! :P

Jean23

Two more days

SO...

tomorow morning, before I vote for Obama & Biden, I will get my last blood test before I pick up my accutane at the pharmacy this week!!!

I am reallly really nervous. This past month I have gone on birth control for the Ipledge program, and I feel like it has really helped my skin. I also started using a very gentle cleanser and less retin A at night, along with a light oil free moisturizer. It is not perfect at all, but it is worlds better than it was a month ago... I feel like it gets better every day, but I have to make sure I keep up with it religiously.... I am still scared that accutane is going to make it worse!

Even though my skin is getting better without accutane, I really do not want to have to carefully apply treatment every night of my life, and still get a few pimples.... I really do want a cure... is it possible for accutane to have reverse affects?? I have waited SO long to start this medicine, and now the day is here and I am FREAKING out. There are so many other important things going on in the world/my life right now, and I am still obsessing over my acne...ugh.

Any advice or inspriation is serrrriously welcomed.

Jean23

Accutane

After a visit at the dermatologist yesterday and a slight emotional breakdown, I have been prescribed Accutane. So, here we are today, October 2nd - 7:30am I was one of the first to be seen at the walkin clinic to have my blood drawn...

In one month I will start the drug. I am very excited for the possibilites... I keep envisioning myself rolling out of bed and going on my way... ridding myself of a seemingly endless regime each morning/evening. Throwing away my endless supply of different creams/lotions/ washes and concealers. Maybe I will even be capable of keeping a relationship, and not constantly fearing to be found out for a fraud under my makeup.

On the contrary to this dream of a clear complexion I have serious fears that my acne will become severely worse, and I will only regret going on accutane... I don't know if I can handle a get-worse-before-better sitution emotionally... I find myself addicted to these message boards, it is unbelievable how many people can relate to a problem that is impossible to face in "real" life.

I can only have faith that this is a treatment that will work for me. It is truly a last resort, and what feels like my last chance at a normal life. I have decided to record my jounrey like so many others online.

Here's hoping...! -xo

Jean23

New to Acne.org

I am new to acne.org - this being my very first "blog" entry.

I don't know where to start, or how much to share... I am hoping to talk to people with a similar story that can advise me on a way to clear skin...if at all possible.

Comments welcome!

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