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Today I was getting very excited when I was talking about something. I am drinking coffee non stop (yeah, I started again and plan to stop), so I am getting very red.

A very innocent girl said "you look like a gigantic pimple!" I said "why?" She said because I'm getting very red.

That's the first time she ever said that about me.

I hope I don't look like a gigantic pimple! I hope it was because I was getting flush, and not for any other reason.

I love this kid and I'm sure she didn't say it to be mean. Mabye I should stay calm.

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Stay calm. Unless you had a breakout or something similar.

Thanks. I think she said it just because I was totally flush. I do get totally flush.

I hope it wasn't because I looked all scared and stuff. I don't think I come across that way but I could be wrong.

I am so totally freaked out about my life right now! It's the worst. A family member has started chemo today. A sister doesn't talk to me anymore and probably will never again. Another sisiter will be mvoign away. I'm out of a freaking job and I c an't find a new one. No one wants to keep me when they do hire me. I'm 45 freaking years old! I CAN'T TAKE IT.

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