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hammie

I feel like I lost my love...

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There was this guy (call him A) I haven't been seeing for 8 years. He and I were quite fond of each other in the past, and we've been keeping in contact, but time and again, I couldn't bring myself to meet him because I feel inferior to him in terms of experience and character, and of an incident in the past where another classmate who also 'liked' me kind of neglected me ever since he saw me in person after 4 years of absence.

Now I don't think I'll meet A again more than ever, he's even furthur from me, we're like worlds apart even though we're both now in the same small city (which I kind of dislike). A long childhood memory, with new friends, new people he sparks off with perhaps.

I just feel kind of regret....that I haven't seen him before when we were less far apart. We haven't even been in a relationship with each other, but I feel a sense of lost love, at least we could try being together for once and see how it works out. When I finally catch up with him in terms of maturity and experience, he may already be unattainable.

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I have found that taking a break in a relationship, then growing apart, and then growing together again helps the relationship a lot and makes it better then ever.

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We weren't even in a relationship before...

8 years...8 of our formative years.....isn't that too long a time...

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Guest Grow_To_Overthrow

I have found that taking a break in a relationship, then growing apart, and then growing together again helps the relationship a lot and makes it better then ever.

Really? I find that really interesting. I really love my current girlfriend, but at times i feel i'd be better off moving on from the relationship. But then i'm afraid that we'd never get back together. It's not that i want to break up just to get back with her, just that i want to do a bit more living. :think:

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Really? I find that really interesting. I really love my current girlfriend, but at times i feel i'd be better off moving on from the relationship. But then i'm afraid that we'd never get back together. It's not that i want to break up just to get back with her, just that i want to do a bit more living. :think:

I think it's a bit of a dilemma...

I want to do a bit more living, people are part of my living, but they also hinder my living

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There was this guy (call him A) I haven't been seeing for 8 years. He and I were quite fond of each other in the past, and we've been keeping in contact, but time and again, I couldn't bring myself to meet him because I feel inferior to him in terms of experience and character, and of an incident in the past where another classmate who also 'liked' me kind of neglected me ever since he saw me in person after 4 years of absence.

Now I don't think I'll meet A again more than ever, he's even furthur from me, we're like worlds apart even though we're both now in the same small city (which I kind of dislike). A long childhood memory, with new friends, new people he sparks off with perhaps.

I just feel kind of regret....that I haven't seen him before when we were less far apart. We haven't even been in a relationship with each other, but I feel a sense of lost love, at least we could try being together for once and see how it works out. When I finally catch up with him in terms of maturity and experience, he may already be unattainable.

How do you know this guy? Have you never met him?

You need to get out and meet new people - forget about this 'lost love' because it never happened and probably never will, if you keep pursueing him he might think you are stalking him or something! Im sorry to be harsh but someone has to be real here!

Get out and do something that makes you feel whole! Skydive, bunjee, go back to college anything - just do something! Just do something and stop over annalysing yourself! If you dont like your town - move! If the people you surround yourself with 'hinder your living' (as you said) then meet new people who make you feel alive and fill you full of confidence and unconditional support! Its very true that you can look at a an individuals friends and see what kind of person they are, if you have nasty bitchy friends, chances are that is who you are. If your friends are genuine, friendly and fun then that is who you are.

Start living girl!

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Now the imposter above gives great advice. If your ever going to do anything Hammie, then follow this to the tee. Don't dwell on any man, none of us are worth it!! ... even me!

:)

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Now the imposter above gives great advice. If your ever going to do anything Hammie, then follow this to the tee. Don't dwell on any man, none of us are worth it!! ... even me!

:)

Imposter? Do you want to expand on that or is it just a random senseless comment?

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How do you know this guy? Have you never met him?

You need to get out and meet new people - forget about this 'lost love' because it never happened and probably never will, if you keep pursueing him he might think you are stalking him or something! Im sorry to be harsh but someone has to be real here!

Get out and do something that makes you feel whole! Skydive, bunjee, go back to college anything - just do something! Just do something and stop over annalysing yourself! If you dont like your town - move! If the people you surround yourself with 'hinder your living' (as you said) then meet new people who make you feel alive and fill you full of confidence and unconditional support! Its very true that you can look at a an individuals friends and see what kind of person they are, if you have nasty bitchy friends, chances are that is who you are. If your friends are genuine, friendly and fun then that is who you are.

Start living girl!

He was my elementary school classmate in the later years. I haven't met him for 8 years. I don't keep pursuing him, we're just keeping touch with each other but we don't meet.

It's not that easy to just move, as I'm now currently still in college here and also, I would not want to move far from my family and relatives. I just realised something recently, my family, relatives and I are really just separate entities, in fact everyone are separate entities. I used to think they are part of me and I live for them alone and make decisions based on them alone.

Actually when I said "I want to do a bit more living, people are part of my living, but they also hinder my living" I was just illustrating a common problem...not necessarily talking about my present situation.

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Guest Mish Mosh

I dont understand the story sorry.

You havent met him? How can anybody be in love with someone they havent met? Sorry if I am wrong here.

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How do you know this guy? Have you never met him?

You need to get out and meet new people - forget about this 'lost love' because it never happened and probably never will, if you keep pursueing him he might think you are stalking him or something! Im sorry to be harsh but someone has to be real here!

Get out and do something that makes you feel whole! Skydive, bunjee, go back to college anything - just do something! Just do something and stop over annalysing yourself! If you dont like your town - move! If the people you surround yourself with 'hinder your living' (as you said) then meet new people who make you feel alive and fill you full of confidence and unconditional support! Its very true that you can look at a an individuals friends and see what kind of person they are, if you have nasty bitchy friends, chances are that is who you are. If your friends are genuine, friendly and fun then that is who you are.

Start living girl!

He was my elementary school classmate in the later years. I haven't met him for 8 years. I don't keep pursuing him, we're just keeping touch with each other but we don't meet.

It's not that easy to just move, as I'm now currently still in college here and also, I would not want to move far from my family and relatives. I just realised something recently, my family, relatives and I are really just separate entities, in fact everyone are separate entities. I used to think they are part of me and I live for them alone and make decisions based on them alone.

Actually when I said "I want to do a bit more living, people are part of my living, but they also hinder my living" I was just illustrating a common problem...not necessarily talking about my present situation.

um? ok

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I dont understand the story sorry.

You havent met him? How can anybody be in love with someone they havent met? Sorry if I am wrong here.

I mean I haven't met him for 8 years, he was my elementary school friend, we only communicate with each other via letters and online. A few times ago he suggested meeting up but I keep saying another time.

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Guest Mish Mosh

sounds like you enjoy talking yourself out of it by making excuses

people who dont take risks end up doing nothing

it's no big deal. I cant see the problem except lack of confidence

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Can you expand on why you feel inferior to him? and also what grade are you guys in now? And how do you know he's not currently seeing someone

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sounds like you enjoy talking yourself out of it by making excuses

people who dont take risks end up doing nothing

it's no big deal. I cant see the problem except lack of confidence

Yes, eventually I'll want to meet him when I feel better about myself, but question is how long...

Lost love? eh? You've never been out with him so how can he be a lost love? There was no love in the first place. Sounds like your creating a whole little world (in your head) around someone you've not seen in 8 years. Seems odd to me.

My advice is either meet him and see what happens, yeah that means taking a risk on your behalf. Or move on and live your life looking foward not backwards to what could have been. Cos you're wasting your life living like you are now.

This 'I regret' stuff and excuses is bs, sorry. We can live our whole lives regretting things so just get off your arse and meet him. What's the worst that could happen? You might not like each other but the best? Hell you might even end up going out with him....who knows IF YOU NEVER EVEN TRY!

But if you can't take that risk then it's your loss.

That's why I said 'I feel like i lost my love'. It's quite stupid, it's like I'm avoiding relationships just to wait for the time when I can make an attempt with him first.

Can you expand on why you feel inferior to him? and also what grade are you guys in now? And how do you know he's not currently seeing someone

Well he's a high flyer to me, currently a medic and good in literature and worldly stuff..has a more colourful social life bla bla....good looking....mature...and he skipped a few grades....entered uni earlier than me though we're of the same age....more experience than me.....

I'm quite sure he's currently not seeing someone though.

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I've lost my love too, acne enjoys ruining things. All you can rely on is fate, i pray and just hope when this shit goes away i might be able to get her back someday. But while i have acne i just give up with life all together.

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