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I mean wouldn't you get suspicious if someone has never been in a real relationship if you were on a date with them. Wouldn't you kinda wonder if maybe there's something wrong with this person.

I would not be suspicious at all

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ive never kissed or had a girlfriend, but im pretty young and dont mind waiting for the right girl as long as i do find her :angel:

if you think you are her, feel free to give me a pm :razz:

Edited by o_Adam_o
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I am 44 now and have been long married, but I remember feeling the way you do when I was your age. You will find someone, it just takes time to find the right person. Relax, don't try to force it and it will happen. Best wishes to you!

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I reckon i'd of beaten acne now if i still had my girlfriend, all this crying and stressing over losing her isnt helping. Having someone there makes you feel so much better, i just feel lonely now. I miss her too much.

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Ok now heres my honest opinion on this. Everyone is human. Yes Acne sucks believe me I get depressed about it all the time and its really affected my life for the past year or two and I just want the acne to go away, its starting to (knocks on wood) but not fast enough.

Anyways about dating, I have had way to many girlfriends through junior high and highschool. Junior \ Senior year of Highschool I kind of became anti-social and just stayed at home all the time and lost contact with people. Alot was going on, Then towards the end of senior year I started breaking out. And made it worse by picking, my acne really isnt that bad anymore its just lots of scarring and red marks. BUT

I found someone I really can honestly say I love. Weve been dating a while now and she has pretty much perfect skin, She gets a couple blemishes on her chin but her skins clear. Unless I wear makeup (which I do most of the time now) You can see blemishes and red marks and shes seen me with them. I have terrible bacne though but Im working on that hardcore and its starting to clear up. Anyways, heres my opinion.

ONCE YOU GET PAST THE INTITIAL MEETING EACH OTHER 90% of the relationship and what girls are attracted to is personality, personaltiy and how you treat the girl is everything to them. Just be yourself and be kind and caring and it will go a long long way.

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Guest FearlessBunnyLove

Anyway :] Dating is crappy. I couldn't be arsed to date right now. I have so many problems myself, how am I supposed to deal with someone elses? And then our problems COMBINED, I mean the whole world would just implode.

In all seriousness though, I think people should be secure/confident before they enter a relationship. Relationships can pull in so many undesired directions when you're not secure with yourself. And I guess some people could counterargue "well maybe if so-and-so had a partner they'd feel more confident!" Well I don't really think it works that way in the end. Plus when you're so bloody unconfident, a partner isn't like a bonus to your life anymore. They practically BECOME your life. Like your whole happiness revolves around that person. And getting happiness out of someone isn't a bad thing in retrospect, but when you can't fend for yourself that's a no-no.

A problem I had when my relationship ended (that I entered when I was really insecure) is that I felt like that was it, that there was no one else for me. Or that no one else would even want me.

So. Stand on your own two feet first. Can't hurt

There's the story of my life and the reason why I'm not dating for awhile. I don't want my next relationship to be doomed from the start.

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ive never kissed or had a girlfriend, but im pretty young and dont mind waiting for the right girl as long as i do find her :angel:

if you think you are her, feel free to give me a pm :razz:

Oh Adam.. that's bleak..

Anyway :] Dating is crappy. I couldn't be arsed to date right now. I have so many problems myself, how am I supposed to deal with someone elses? And then our problems COMBINED, I mean the whole world would just implode.

In all seriousness though, I think people should be secure/confident before they enter a relationship. Relationships can pull in so many undesired directions when you're not secure with yourself. And I guess some people could counterargue "well maybe if so-and-so had a partner they'd feel more confident!" Well I don't really think it works that way in the end. Plus when you're so bloody unconfident, a partner isn't like a bonus to your life anymore. They practically BECOME your life. Like your whole happiness revolves around that person. And getting happiness out of someone isn't a bad thing in retrospect, but when you can't fend for yourself that's a no-no.

A problem I had when my relationship ended (that I entered when I was really insecure) is that I felt like that was it, that there was no one else for me. Or that no one else would even want me.

So. Stand on your own two feet first. Can't hurt

PS. My cat just brought in a dead mouse, and I can hear its bones cracking as he gnaws on it

I couldn't have said it better. I see so many people who are unhappy with themself who are out there trying to bring their unhappiness into someone else's life. Chances are you lack of confidence and low feeling of self worth are going to rub off the wrong way.

I think it's important to conquer your own problems, and to be happy about yourself before you try to share yourself with somebody else.

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Women have it a lot worse when it comes to physical disfigurement, the reason behind this is men care a great deal about looks.

Well no, that's very wrong indeed. It's somewhat of a media driven fallacy that men are all looks driven and all women care about is the personality. It's much easier for a woman, physically disfigured or not, to get a man than vice versa. You don't believe me? Well, I go by evidence. Have a look on this forum and see what percentage of people that say they have never had a relationship are men. It's almost ALL of them. Now go onto any other site about physical disfigurement and you will see the same thing. I've seen programmes on TV about people with physical scars or disfigurements, and by and large most of the women have partners. Now, I agree that men TALK about the physical aspect of women a lot, but talking and doing are two very different things. Men are far more likely to look past physical problems. The ugliest girls I have ever known had at least a couple of guys chase them in the short time I knew them. I knew one girl that looked like Gimli the dwarf (from LOTR movie) and even she had a guy after her. Women, on the other hand, are much much fussier. Why? Because they can be. When you look like Gimli the dwarf and yet you still have guys chase you, then you can afford to pick your favourite.

I think I read and article on why women don't ask men out, and the writer (a woman by the way) said something along the lines of 'a reasonable looking woman will have several men after her at any one time, so she doesn't need to approach men.'. I think this is very true. This doesn't mean woman are more shallow than men, it just means that looks are important to them too, and since they are in a much better position to make a choice without fear of rejection, they make the choice that most appeals to them. Of course, women aren't very honest about this.

Edited by Corvidae
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Women have it a lot worse when it comes to physical disfigurement, the reason behind this is men care a great deal about looks.

Well no, that's very wrong indeed. It's somewhat of a media driven fallacy that men are all looks driven and all women care about is the personality. It's much easier for a woman, physically disfigured or not, to get a man than vice versa. You don't believe me? Well, I go by evidence. Have a look on this forum and see what percentage of people that say they have never had a relationship are men. It's almost ALL of them. Now go onto any other site about physical disfigurement and you will see the same thing. I've seen programmes on TV about people with physical scars or disfigurements, and by and large most of the women have partners. Now, I agree that men TALK about the physical aspect of women a lot, but talking and doing are two very different things. Men are far more likely to look past physical problems. The ugliest girls I have ever known had at least a couple of guys chase them in the short time I knew them. I knew one girl that looked like Gimli the dwarf (from LOTR movie) and even she had a guy after her. Women, on the other hand, are much much fussier. Why? Because they can be. When you look like Gimli the dwarf and yet you still have guys chase you, then you can afford to pick your favourite.

I think I read and article on why women don't ask men out, and the writer (a woman by the way) said something along the lines of 'a reasonable looking woman will have several men after her at any one time, so she doesn't need to approach men.'. I think this is very true. This doesn't mean woman are more shallow than men, it just means that looks are important to them too, and since they are in a much better position to make a choice without fear of rejection, they make the choice that most appeals to them. Of course, women aren't very honest about this.

Totally agree with what you said. I think it was Chris Rock that said even the ugliest girls get offered dick 10 times a day.

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Guest james11

Shit, i guess i was blessed to have an Acne free high school life. I had girlfriends all through high school and lead a pretty cruisey life until i was 19 and a half. Oh well, hopefully not much longer of this stuff and then i can re-group.

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this reminds me of my thread "who has it worse with acne, men or women?"

its gotta be guys...i work with mostly women and there are girls there with acne worse than mine who get asked out every day...

women will always have guys apporaching them, regardless of how they look.

men on the other hand, must possess confidence. how can you be confident when you can even look yourself in the mirror.

a girl with no confidence doesnt matter cause guys just want some. hell guys dont even care if the girl speaks as long as he can get some.

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Yeah but put yourself in the girls position.. Would you want a girl that just 'wanted some' because she felt too 'unattractive' to get it from someone she was actually attracted to? That's a bit tragic isn't it? I'd rather masturbate than get some from an ogre/someone I'm not physically attracted to. People, especially on these acne forums seem to validate themselves and base their self worth on relationships/dates. Stop feeding into that bullshit, love is beautiful but don't let the there lack of make you an ugly bitter person.

I know what it's like to be frustrated with acne, I always knew I was a great looking guy. I believe I've suffered the psychological effects of acne after I cleared, I turned into an arrogant dickhead because I suddenly felt so much better than everyone because I wrongly based selfworth on appearance. Pulling chicks is fun and a reputation for a different girl every fortnight makes you feel great, in the end the only person your hurting is yourself, egos are uglier than acne. I'm working on fixing mine. Unfortunately I don't think there is a painless regimen to fix being incredibly good looking with chiseled abs and a perfect bone structure.

I'm trying to be a nicer person in general, care about other people a lot more. Probably part of the reason I still visit this board, I want to help others, that and I have a interest in acne, skin care and the effects of it all(this is starting to sound like i'm selling myself for a job).

I guess my point in a way, don't be fooled by the exterior there is a lot more to it. Looks matter, that i'm not denying what I'm saying is I think everyone is capable of being a wonderful, loving, interesting person capable of having a meaningful relationship regardless of skin condition, you have to put yourself on the market to be bought.

Drunken Rant,

The one and only.

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i'm 18 years old and i've never been in a relationship either. :( so remember that you're not alone.

I'm going to be 23 soon and I've never really been in a relationship. I have kissed a girl and been on maybe two dates but that's it. I have between moderate and severe acne. I don't consider myself a good looking guy to begin with so the acne is really a kick in the pants. Anyways I feel like the older I get it's harder and harder to date. Maybe some of you older folks on here can relate.

I'm working now so I find its not as easy to meet people as when you're in school. Plus pretty much no one around me has acne now since they're all adults. When you're a teenager its not so bad because a lot of teens get acne. But when you're 23 its a big set back. Also mentally it really plays with your self esteem. I've been rejected a bunch of times and I always blame my acne.

I see all my friends get dates, break up, then get in new relationships and I feel like I'm on the sidelines just watching. Astonished by how easy it is for them. Plus the older I get, I think it'll be harder to be in a relationship if I reveal my lack of dating history. I mean wouldn't you get suspicious if someone has never been in a real relationship if you were on a date with them. Wouldn't you kinda wonder if maybe there's something wrong with this person.

At 23 I feel its starting to get borderline about having no relationships. Like its not that bad yet.. but when I start pushing 24 then duh duh duh duhhhhh.... 25 is when people will really start to look at me weird. If I hit 25 and I'm still in this position I'm hitting the panic button, going all out, hitting on every single girl on the street, joining every dating website. Desperate? Yea... at that time I will be...

Anyways maybe some of you can relate, maybe someone can offer some advice... or maybe some of you just want to flame me.. whatever...

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Hm, this post is getting longer than I expected. Anyways thanks to those who replied. To the above poster yea I've tried online dating. I think its a waste of money to join those sites cause guys out number women like 10 to 1. I've only had one date from that and she went out with me twice then that was it. I'm not really a bar person but I've been to clubs and no sucess there either.

I just got back from the dermatologist and he suggested accutane which I've already been on twice, he argues that I wasn't on a high enough dosage. Is it just me or is every dermatologist's answer to acne is just use accutane. They take one look at your face and its accutane accutane accutane! Blah. I'm not very optimistic about it since my previous rounds of accutane did absolutely nothing. He said winter is a bad time to start it so it won't happen until April. So it will be many many more months of acne for me.

He also said my face was pretty scarred up which I never really noticed, and now I kinda feel shitty about it. agh.

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