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unlucky

Ance & Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD)

I'm so completely BDD - I hate my body, the way I look, my skin, everything.

The problem is that it is makes me stress out really bad before leaving the house, especially due to my problems with acne.

Anybody have any advice?

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BDD is an odd one... it is more concerned with delusion of how one looks than just plain feeling ugly. If you are a beauty queen who is convinced she is hideous then yeah it probably is something along those lines. Personally speaking I know I'm no more attractive than what most consider 'average' but I don't think I'm disgusting either... I do feel bad about the way I look A LOT but I think I have a pretty firm grip upon the reality of these feelings and why I get them. Nobody worth anybody's time ever thinks they're as attractive as they really are. The people that do generally hide beneath that skin-deep security anyway and are shallow as a result. The most interesting. stimulating and REAL people you'll meet in your life will be insecure. Fact.

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sounds more like obsessive compulsive disorder sataninheels.

==

unlucky, i have bdd to some form or other, i have no confidence with regards to my face and my body. what can I do? Its gone to the point where I cannot possibly go out with anyone because i feel that bad about myself.

hope you feel better, you aren't alone, hang in there unlucky

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i actually tried to start a post a while back on BDD but it didnt get much attention.

anyway BDD+OCD are linked, they are both sick 'obssesions'.

i had severe BDD for a few years, i couldnt go to school or even leave the house and i was fixed on getting plastic surgery, even booking appointments.

i completley avoided mirrors so i didnt go insane about how i looked, it was a nightmare.

and i also had serious suicide thoughts.

BDD sufferers usually obsses about one or two exaggerated or non exsistent flaws, in my case it was my skin and nose.

and i would have panic attacks if someone came over.

anyway thats a pretty sevser case.

also BDD is very similar to anorexia, obssesing and halucinating over a phisycal flaw and they are both linked to OCD (which i also suffered from). usualy a person is likely to have suffered from all of these at one time or another. its pretty sad.

anyway just my 2 cents, hope that helps.

oh btw, i dont have BDD anymore and i only have really mild OCD which doest really bother me.

also im sure there are alot of BDD suffereres on this board that dont even know it.

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Guest ldanielle

SatanInHeels, how can you afford plastic surgery though when you're only 17 (I think that's what you said in one post I read anyway) and still studying for A-Levels?

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I am INSANELY lucky in that while a mess of personality disorders and dysfunctions I have been in the past, how I looked was never a problem.

I don't know how that happened. By the rules, I'm supposed to HATE the way I look. I'm supposed to have some kind of severe image perception of my body that is very self-loathing. But I don't. I've always been at least moderatly satisfied with my body and how I looked.

I don't know what it's like to hate your body. But from reading these posts, it's got to be hard.

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Guest *Clara

If I start looking at magazines or pictures of women with very pretty bodies, hair, or skin I start to obsess about my looks and it's crazy. I start clarifying my hair, deep conditoning for hours, protein treatments... this is just an example of how much I do to my hair and not to mention everything else. As long as I don't analyze those pictures I'm fine.

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and i would have panic attacks if someone came over.

Did you go on any surgery consultations? Did any of them notice you had BDD or did they say you would actually be a

good candidate for a nose job?

Have you read that book; The Broken Mirror (BDD one)? Ive heard a lot of good things about it so I might buy it, it looks

interesting.

no i never got to any consultations cos my parents wouldnt let me and i was too young.

i was first diagnosed with just depression by a pshcologist when it was really bdd too but then i went to a bdd specialist and was diagnosed with bdd. that often happens as bdd is not well known, so people often get mis-diagnosed with depression or social anxiety, hence the bdd never gets better.

and yes ive got and read 'the broken mirror' (trust me, my mum has bought like every book about bdd) its very good and if ur not sure if u have bdd u can read the symptoms and do a questionair that will unofficialy diagnose u but if its serious and by that i mean if its compromising ur lifestyle and stopping u from doing normal things and ur 'preoccupied' with ur so-called flaws then i suggest u go to a doctor.

anyway u can pm me anytime.

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and i would have panic attacks if someone came over.

Did you go on any surgery consultations? Did any of them notice you had BDD or did they say you would actually be a

good candidate for a nose job?

Have you read that book; The Broken Mirror (BDD one)? Ive heard a lot of good things about it so I might buy it, it looks

interesting.

no i never got to any consultations cos my parents wouldnt let me and i was too young.

i was first diagnosed with just depression by a pshcologist when it was really bdd too but then i went to a bdd specialist and was diagnosed with bdd. that often happens as bdd is not well known, so people often get mis-diagnosed with depression or social anxiety, hence the bdd never gets better.

and yes ive got and read 'the broken mirror' (trust me, my mum has bought like every book about bdd) its very good and if ur not sure if u have bdd u can read the symptoms and do a questionair that will unofficialy diagnose u but if its serious and by that i mean if its compromising ur lifestyle and stopping u from doing normal things and ur 'preoccupied' with ur so-called flaws then i suggest u go to a doctor.

anyway u can pm me anytime.

good advice

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omg satan in heels i just read all that and i can relate to nearly all of it!!

I have to have at least 3 hours getting ready time if im going clubbing or meeting

someone I want to fancy me, I have to make sure ive done everything, shaved, tanned, make-up, hair, perfumes, body lotions...all the rest..

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I often get ready to go out and then look in the mirror and feel like crying, then end up not going. I keep the curtains shut in my room constantly and shut the blinds/curtains in any room in the house I'm in, because I can't stand to see myself in bright lighting, or any lighting for that matter, but I can usually cope in dim light.

It's getting to the point where I'm avoiding going to college because of it and saying I'm ill, because I don't want people to see me looking disgusting. Even when I am in college, I always feel like people are looking at me in disgust, and I always try to cover my face with my hair or hands, and then I know I'm probably looking like some sort of retard doing this and making myself look even weirder but I can't help but do it. I'm basically a mute around all my friends in real life, in college, because I can't stand to speak most of the time because I don't want to attract attention to myself and have people looking me in the face.

But even though I feel so disgusted with the way I look, I sometimes feel so incredibly guilty and selfish for thinking about it so much, and that also makes me want to cry. I know how other people have problems that are so much worse, but it doesn't make me stop thinking about how disgusting and inhuman I feel I look.

However, I don't have BDD, because I know I really do look like shit, I know I'm not imagining it, anyone who says otherwise to me is just bullshitting and being nice, I feel like people pity me for fuck's sake.

I can relate to everything you have just said - 110%

and yes, you do have BDD. Even though it's not an illusion, your appearance and flaws still affect your day-to-day functioning significantly which is what BDD is all about. Look up that website I posted...and read the description there. It just makes you cry because you can relate to everything being said. There's a supportive forum there as well where people actually UNDERSTAND what you're going through.

Understanding and empathy are so important and helpful when you've got this disorder. At least you don't feel alone in this 'never ending' vicious cycle of utter self-hatred.

I'm very similar to you where I avoid bright lights, even daylight as much as possible. I feel like a vampire....only coming out at night because I can't stand the sun and how every single flaw, pore, imperfection, bump, pimple, scar, blemish is visible and accentuated.

I've also reached the point where I've withdrawn myself from the rest of the world. I've transformed into this self conscious, socially inept individual. I've lost nearly all my friends... my studies have been affected due to excessive unattendance and my relationships with everyone including family are slowly if not already deteriotating...

I really don't know what to do anymore......

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I can truly relate to the dim rooms, its were I wanna be because bright lighting makes me real uncomfortable, sunny days suck for me unfortunately.

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but what about social anxiety disorder? do BDD and SAD go together, or are they mutually exclusive - you can only have one? Im a bit suspicious of these umbrella classifications, they can make you feel that you wer doomed from the start, or you are in need of serious help, when in actual fact you are much more normal than you might believe and only need good friends or to 'grow out of' acne (if thats possible in your collective cases) and not an antidepressant!

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jack spratt, i often think the same thing, like these days 'they' have to put a 'disorder' to every little thing thats apparentley not normal, its kinda ridiculous, for example every kid that is shitty or over energetic has ADD when its just the parens that let the little shit get away with anything, hence the kid being a shit, you know? but the doctors just want to cover it up with some stupid disorder. (did anyone see that episode of south park? its was funny but kinda true)

but yeh, i dunno, i guess its just when your apparentley not normal, u dont react to things rationaly or normaly - whatever normal is.

i just think they have to stop putting a name to every little abnormality which arent even abnormalities and relise some people are just retarted - lol, in a normal kind of way - if you know what i mean, and just have to get over it. easy to say. but still.

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If you check out that website I posted and read about BDD, you'll see that it's very very specific and if you can relate to the majority of those things, then it'd be safe to say that you've got it.

however, there's a warning there stressing how important it is for people not to diagnose the disorder themselves but to leave it to trained professionals. I really don't need some 'professional' to diagnose my condition, because I'm 110% sure that I fall into that category.

Social anxiety is a characteristic of BDD. People with BDD often find it hard to maintain proper close relationships with people and have social anxiety. The ability to socialise and interact with people is a definite challenge for those suffering from this disorder. It's such a bad feeling :(

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