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Just to introduce myself, I'm a 28 yr old male who suffered from cystic acne in my teens which left me with some pretty bad acne scarring. Not to sound conceited but I'm a good looking guy, intelligent, succesful, with a nice body and unique sense of humor. The scarring just detracts from my looks and affects my self confidence and self esteem sometimes. Lately, I've been meeting and dating a lot of heavier set women, all of who are fun to hang out with and pretty. But I don't know what's wrong with me, I just can't bring myself to going to bed with them. The irony is that I myself have scarring that probably turns a lot of women off. I know I'm being superficial but it really disgusts me when I am hugging them or holding them, and can't even imagine caressing them with their clothes off. I used to go out with a lot of thin attractive women, but I have been having a difficult time with them lately so I guess I've gone to my "B-list" if you will. But now I think it's pointless because I don't know if I'll never be attracted to them physically or get over that hurdle. What can I do? How can I change my thinking? Am I an asshole? Just want to be honest with everyone here. I would never say anything to this effect in real life to anyone. Also, how would they react or how do I approach them about losing weight in a tactful manner?

thanks all for any advice.

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Guest mishmosh

perhaps talk about you losing your attitude problem first?

BTW, what has this got to do with acne support?

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"ugly in the inside, ugly on the outside"

Lose your attitude it probably shows through.

Okay so you don't like overweight people right in a sexual attraction sense? But don't call them b-list.

ANd don't ask a girl to change their weight, accept them for who they are. How would you feel if a girl said 'lose your scars and maybe ill go out with you?' If you aren't attracted to them, fair enough.

Sigh... eusa_hand.gif

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You know reading this prompts me to post something I read in the daily mail (the best selling news paper in the U.K for our american friends) and one of articles near the front of the paper on like page 4... the heading was something like "Bad news ladies" scientists in three different countries did exstensive tests and found a way to prove that the male pyschology responds much better to a slender female figure, i cant remember the exact details but it has something to do with the way our eyes are shaped believe it or not, and it basically said 98% (YEP NINETY EIGHT) of men respond sexually much more to slender women. Now this kind of annoyed me a bit, but not because of the reason you may think.

You see women dont have any set prefferance, they dont have any set parameters, we (men) dont REALLY know how to improve ourselves for them, we have a very rough idea.. but no real set standard...

WHEREAS WOMEN have just been given a clear cut goal....they've been given a SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN way to make themselves more attractive all they have to do is be inbetween a size 8 - 12 and their set..

sigh i wish there was parameters like this for men..... i'd live in the gym.

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"ugly in the inside, ugly on the outside"

Lose your attitude it probably shows through.

Okay so you don't like overweight people right in a sexual attraction sense? But don't call them b-list.

ANd don't ask a girl to change their weight, accept them for who they are. How would you feel if a girl said 'lose your scars and maybe ill go out with you?' If you aren't attracted to them, fair enough.

Sigh... eusa_hand.gif

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Guest mishmosh

you make 'overweight' people sound like a charity case

perhaps you should read what you wrote.

'compassionate person' ? you give blokes a really bad name.

You sound young and painfully immature

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you make overweight people sound like a charity case

perhaps you should read what you wrote.

'compassionate person' ?  you give blokes a really bad name.

You sound young and painfully immature

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You know reading this prompts me to post something I read in the daily mail (the best selling news paper in the U.K for our american friends) and one of articles  near the front of the paper on like page 4... the heading was something like "Bad news ladies" scientists in three different countries did exstensive tests and found a way to prove that the male pyschology responds much better to a slender female figure, i cant remember the exact details but it has something to do with the way our eyes are shaped believe it or not, and it basically said 98% (YEP NINETY EIGHT) of men respond sexually much more to slender women. Now this kind of annoyed me a bit, but not because of the reason you may think.

You see women dont have any set prefferance, they dont have any set parameters, we (men) dont REALLY know how to improve ourselves for them, we have a very rough idea.. but no real set standard...

WHEREAS WOMEN have just been given a clear cut goal....they've been given a SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN way to make themselves more attractive all they have to do is be inbetween a size 8 - 12 and their set..

sigh i wish there was parameters like this for men..... i'd live in the gym.

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"ugly in the inside, ugly on the outside"

Lose your attitude it probably shows through.

Okay so you don't like overweight people right in a sexual attraction sense? But don't call them b-list.

ANd don't ask a girl to change their weight, accept them for who they are. How would you feel if a girl said 'lose your scars and maybe ill go out with you?' If you aren't attracted to them, fair enough.

Sigh... eusa_hand.gif

relax dude...how old are you? get a firm grip on reality. that's how things work. most guys think what i say...they just think it and not say it.

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Guest mishmosh

Oh! you re-read what you said. I challenged you and you erased it?

Well I'm your age actually. You should have grown out of all that superficial larky by now.

I expect theyre going out with sloppy seconds by seeing you.

There you go! Everyone is equal!

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Oh! you re-read what you said. I challenged you and you erased it?

Well I'm your age actually. You should have grown out of all that superficial larky by now.

I expect theyre going out with sloppy seconds by seeing you.

There you go! Everyone is equal!

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Actually, I really wasn't thinking there might be some heavier set women reading this and might get their feelings hurt. So sorry about that. I guess I am a bit insensitive, but it's hard to talk about this anywhere else.

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Guest mishmosh

You nasty, patronising chauvinistic pig

No I am not overweight (Im a US size 6) and even if I was - so what?

I cant be arsed with you. Never argue with idiots, cos they will drag you down with experience.

Least you admit you're an arsehole.

I bid you good day Sir and close the door on the way out!

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ahdghahasha mishmosh that surgery is going to cost a lot of money

removing a stick that large from your ass will take some doing.

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You nasty, patronising chauvinistic pig

No I am not overweight (Im a US size 6) and even if I was - so what?

I cant be arsed with you. Never argue with idiots, cos they will drag you down with experience.

Least  you admit you're an arsehole.

I bid you good day Sir and close the door on the way out!

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Most fat people have a psychological need to eat. Asking them to lose weight is like asking a drunk to stop drinking...most of them will have been battling their size their whole lives. If they could lose weight dont you think they would??

I think your being honest....theres too many people in todays society who dont like honesty....if you dont like dating fat women and find them unattractive...thats your perogative its really no one elses business but your own.

Maybe you are an ass....but so are lots of people

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Guest *Clara

Either open up your heart and mind to be a better person or stay an asshole. Only you can change yourself.

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Believe what you will, i'm really not an asshole most of the time. I could care less if other people think that regardless. It's just that sometimes I feel like I've become this way because of my acne scarring and I don't like it. Anyways nobody's perfect. I've read some of your posts and you can come off as a real bitch sometimes too Clara.

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Guest pokerbugg

dont listen to them , youre not an asshole, its just reality, MOST guys think the way you do, only you have the balls to put the words together and just throw it out there.... what i dont get is why are you dating these fat chicks if thats not what you really like, im sure there are chicks who can look past your scarring, theres someone for everyone, and im sure you dont have to settle for less than what you consider whats best for you ... these people should be open minded and not just automatically bash you for being unshamely truthful.

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