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Disintegration

Random people giving you advice about acne!

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So...... I got my haircut the other day, and the hairdresser was this really nice, sweet girl. Just as she was finishing up, however, she started telling me that I should try and keep my hair off my face, and demonstrating how to do this, as "It gives you spots". Then she starts teling me to make an appointment with the aestheticain....or whatever the hell they're called, that works at the salon, and giving me all this other rubbish advice about acne!

I really didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I was just thinking, this girl has no idea how many years I have suffered acne, how long I have ben seeing a dermatologist, what I have been through with it, and how I have tried virtually every product, crazy diet and mad regimen under the sun. She has no idea of the pain it has inflicted upon me........she is just dishing out advice as if I have never given my skin a second thought. All the while shew as giving me this symapthetic smile like" you poor, ignorant person, you could just rid of that in a couple of days if you wanted"!! I wish!!!

The worst part was, I actually thought my skin was looking pretty good that day. I went out feeling rather confident and hapy and came home toatly deflated. I only have four actual pimples, and they are all smallish, but I do have loads of red marks. I guess that is what she is referring to. And I guess it is alot more noticable than I thought.

Anyway, she was really nice about it, not bitchy at all, I know she was just trying to help, but it was still so mortifying. I just wanted to crawl out of there.

Does anyone else experience this?

Do other people just not get it that we don't want random advice from total strangers who've never had a spot a day in their lives???

It is so shattering for the self-esteem. I now feel very low. sad.gif

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Hey Disintegration! I know what you are talking about. You can be sure it is a common thing, because noone likes to get "good advice" about acne/scars...especially not if you already do everything you can to get rid of it! Look at the situation this way: All people have different genetics. One just have to accept that. So some people are prone to acne/scarring and some are not. So you should not get upset with yourself about the fact that you get acne, because that is probably mostly determined by your genetics. The only way you could critisize yourself was if you never bothered to do anything about your face. But the important fact is that you DO! Anything else would be to expect too much of yourself, because you cannot change your genetics. Hence, since you do anything you can, you ought to be proud of yourself, because you do what you can....

In other words...since you do what you can there is absolutely no reason to get depressed....as you said she probably just wanted to help...but I feel the same way you do...it is damn hard to accept that we have different genetics!

The more time you spend being depressed the less time there will be for happiness in your life!

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People doing that seems so weird to me. Are you guys American? That would never happen here in the UK. If you have acne, people never mention it for fear of offending you. They just do it behind your back. I prefer that!

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People doing that seems so weird to me. Are you guys American? That would never happen here in the UK. If you have acne, people never mention it for fear of offending you. They just do it behind your back. I prefer that!

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People doing that seems so weird to me. Are you guys American? That would never happen here in the UK. If you have acne, people never mention it for fear of offending you. They just do it behind your back. I prefer that!

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ive had mad advice from peole over the years like the only way is to burn the spots of with boiling water, people are either saying it in a kindhartly way or just trying to insult you ala go take a wash. really these people dont know what there going on about most of the time

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LOL haedturner...yeah, I too am from London, so iIdon't think it is just an American thing.

It is very true about fat people. I would never ever ever give "advice" to an overweight person, just because I am thin, that would be so cruel! Even the thought of doing that makes me cringe! It is just so wrong. Don't they realise how bad acne makes us feel? Do they honestly think we just don't do anything about it ???

This hairdresser wasn't English actually.....she was from Russia or someplace, I think...so perhaps she just deosn't understand Britsih social skills or something....it does seem a very un-British thing to do!

Aw, Sebastien, I feel for you! That sounds bloody awful! Luckily my hairdressers was bascially empty, but I still started blushing like mad!!! It would have been about a thousand times worse if people had actualy been there!

Hey zxc, that is good adivce, and I am normally like that myself, pretty positive. I just get crushed so easily, I guess. It's just that I feel i work so hard on getting my face clear, and even though I know it is improving, others still percieve it as really bad. Genes suck, lol.

BTW people on this forum are so lovely and understanding! I seriously love you all...we are all in this together right??

Much love,

Disintegration xxx

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My average conversation with my dad:

"You should stop sleeping on the side of your face."

"Thanks dad, because everybody knows sleeping on the side of your face causes acne."

"Dating anyone?"

I've had this at least 50-60 times.

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I know what you mean. This was about 4 years ago but I still remember it. sad.gif This boy at school said to me " For christmas I'm going to buy you some Oxy or clearasil wash so you can clear up your skin"

Like I don't even bother doing anything about my skin, like I hadn't tried everything I could to get rid of my acne! arrghh people make me mad sometimes.

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ive had mad advice from peole over the years like the only way is to burn the spots of with boiling water, people are either  saying it in a kindhartly way or just trying to insult you ala go take a wash. really these people dont know what there going on about most of the time

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headturner;

That is an insane thing for a person to say. Eat more fruits and vegetables?

Goddam these people are fucking assholes!

I wouldn't even know how to react to that. I think I would probably follow her into the parking lot and beat her to a pulp if I thought I could get away with it. I really mean that.

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I once told a woman who approached me trying to sell some miracle cure with "Such a shame you're such a pretty girl, my product will help you clear your skin..." I grabbed her hand and told her that I had an incurable disease called IHM, smile.gif infectious hyperkerantic dermycinoglottis, and that I didn't appreciate her jumping to conclusions about my condition. Don't want to take this thread in the wrong direction, but can you imagine someone walking up to a quadrapalegic (sp?) and saying ah, come on now, you can walk, you just need to eat vegetables, wash with this and stop masturbating. One of my fantasies is that one day I'll be going about my business and some doctor will appraoch me and say, you poor dear, why do you still have acne and scarring, I will pro bono you until you are clear, and we'll work on those scars too.

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Guest Freak_Turbulence
My average conversation with my dad:

"You should stop sleeping on the side of your face."

"Thanks dad, because everybody knows sleeping on the side of your face causes acne."

"Dating anyone?"

I've had this at least 50-60 times.

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