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You are your own worst critic...

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acne def has had an emotional toll on my confidence here and there in my life when its bad....i go through periods of no breaking out to periods of breaking out bad with cysts.....but what ive learned is that we are the ones that are causing us our termoil in our minds....we are the ones judging ourselves.....we dont know what others are thinking and we certainly cant control what they think.....stop looking in the mirror so much...everytime you do it your judging yourself good or bad based on your appearance.....acne is what it is....but we are the ones putting the negative judgement on it.........do you what you can to clear it, but judging yourself certainly isnt going to help.......i read that some of you guys hate looking into peoples eyes...thats the worst thing to do...if you do that, you will never get past the fear of being judged...try looking into their eyes and letting them see who you are not just what your appearance might be that day....i bet no one but yourself is actually judging you as harsh as yourself...and they certainly dont obsesively focus on only the zits on your face like you do....i mean think about it, when you see someone with acne you might notice it, but do you really care.....do you realy give a F that this person you dont know has some acne....and then reverse it...does the pubic really give a F that you have some acne....we only have one life right now, stop wasting it because of WHAT YOU ASSUME others think of you......so stop judging yourself.........one thing i do everytime i have a negative thought about myself in my head is say to myself......I AM BEAUTIFUL AND CONFIDENT....despite what you think of acne, it is a great teacher.....stop pitying yourself and learn how to bring your inner personality and confidence out....instead of focusing and blaming your outter appearance...ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANT CONTROL AND HAVE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE WHAT YOU CAN, which is your inner confidence and attitude....

Who knows why we have acne...but eveything happens for a reason...and just maybe you can learn from it...it teaches you how to:

1) Stop being so vane

2) Be more compasionate towards others, acne related or not..

3) Stop judging others based on appearance

4) To accept the things you cant totally control

5) Better your inner qualities

6) Love yourself regardless of your outside PERCIEVED inperfections..

I could go on and on...I def get the acne blues here and there....but if i had acne all my life...I WOULD MUCH RATHER GO ON WITH LIFE ACCEPTING IT AND BEING CARE FREE ABOUT IT, THAN LIVING IN THE SHADOWS AND WITHDRAWING FROM LIFE...and plus, stressing about it just makes it worse...

1) Force yourself to stop looking in the mirror unless you have to, its not going to make it go away.

2) Try to do things that take your mind away from it

3) Remember that you are the one judging yourself...if you are your own worst critic, try being your own best critic..

4) Take it into perspective.....IF acne is the worst thing that has happened to you, than consider yourself very lucky....there are millions of others that are inflicted by much worse things than acne...

5) "YOU" are not the skin on your face, back or wherever....thats not what makes you as a person..

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that's very true, but it's hard to sway your opinions when society is constantly telling you to be thin, pretty and perfect.

i know what bothers me is watching music videos with girls who have perfect skin and thin bodies or even looking at magazines...i have to avoid it altogether.

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just so you know.....im a guy by the way......not that it mattters.....and you know...those perfect girls that you see are very imperfect also.....you just dont see it from watching a music vedio.....very pretty girls usually have bigger insecurtiies than others......they have to constantly live up to being pretty.....AS HUMANS WE ARE ALL PERFECTLY UNPERFECT...none of us are perfect, we all have our insecuties and we all have our lessons to learn in this life time..all these things help us become better human beings....If we were perfect than we would be GOD.....and if this world was perfect it would be Heaven.....but as you know.....its not...

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just so you know.....im a guy by the way......not that it mattters.....and you know...those perfect girls that you see are very imperfect also.....you just dont see it from watching a music vedio.....very pretty girls usually have bigger insecurtiies than others......they have to constantly live up to being pretty.....AS HUMANS WE ARE ALL PERFECTLY UNPERFECT...none of us are perfect, we all have our insecuties and we all have our lessons to learn in this life time..all these things help us become better human beings....If we were perfect than we would be GOD.....and if this world was perfect it would be Heaven.....but as you know.....its not...

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well with my body it's hard finding clothes that don't make me look fat. i've got an hour glass figure and pretty big chest. i'll find a shirt i really like that will fit my waist and arms great but won't fit my chest so i always have to get a size bigger which looks too baggy. it's hard to find jeans because my size is common. i have to be very cautious of the cut and colour of my jeans. i hate searching for jeans, it's always depressing. my family always say "you could lose a few pounds" or "should you be eating that?" i'm not fat but i'm not thin either. my face has mild acne. i get out of the blue zit attacks, which is horrible. they're never show up that bad, but i pick em...so it turns red and gets bigger. i've been using acne medicine for years now which took the nasty zits away. i used to get zits in the form of huge bumps and i don't get them anymore thanks to my medicine. gah. i always want perfect skin, but i know it's impossibe, yet i want it. it doesn't make sense.

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.AS HUMANS WE ARE ALL PERFECTLY UNPERFECT...none of us are perfect, we all have our insecuties and we all have our lessons to learn in this life time..

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But some humans are closer to perfection than others. And society says that they are worth more than those less perfect.

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well with my body it's hard finding clothes that don't make me look fat. i've got an hour glass figure and pretty big chest. i'll find a shirt i really like that will fit my waist and arms great but won't fit my chest so i always have to get a size bigger which looks too baggy. it's hard to find jeans because my size is common. i have to be very cautious of the cut and colour of my jeans. i hate searching for jeans, it's always depressing. my family always say "you could lose a few pounds" or "should you be eating that?" i'm not fat but i'm not thin either. my face has mild acne. i get out of the blue zit attacks, which is horrible. they're never show up that bad, but i pick em...so it turns red and gets bigger. i've been using acne medicine for years now which took the nasty zits away. i used to get zits in the form of huge bumps and i don't get them anymore thanks to my medicine. gah. i always want perfect skin, but i know it's impossibe, yet i want it. it doesn't make sense.

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Do you want to lose weight or are you comfortable with your weight? And there are several ways you can clear up your acne, im not sure what medicine you take, but the ones that i used to take cleared it up completely including the cysts...and you just wrote that you pick them and it makes it worse...stop picking them....and if you absolutely must...wait until they have the white head on it.....DO WHAT YOU CAN TO CLEAR YOUR SKIN AND TO LOSE YOUR WEIGHT(and if you dont care about your weight than dont worry about it, but if you do then start losing it, because its pointless to complain if your not going to try to change it), BUT MY POINT IS TO ACCEPT YOURSELF AND DONT BEAT YOURSELF UP FOR THE THINGS THAT YOU CANT CONTROL...

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and when you have those negative thoughts in your head.....try saying a positive thought......you will be amazed how your thoughts make you feel......like i said in my orginal post.......whenever i feel selfconcious or have a negative thought about my appearance......i say to myself.....I AM BEAUTIFUL AND CONFIDENT....i mean, if you can say the negative thoughts to yourself and react to them then you should be able to say the opposite and get a positive reaction......

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and when you have those negative thoughts in your head.....try saying a positive thought......you will be amazed how your thoughts make you feel......like i said in my orginal post.......whenever i feel selfconcious or have a negative thought about my appearance......i say to myself.....I AM BEAUTIFUL AND CONFIDENT....i mean, if you can say the negative thoughts to yourself and react to them then you should be able to say the opposite and get a positive reaction......

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and when you have those negative thoughts in your head.....try saying a positive thought......you will be amazed how your thoughts make you feel......like i said in my orginal post.......whenever i feel selfconcious or have a negative thought about my appearance......i say to myself.....I AM BEAUTIFUL AND CONFIDENT....i mean, if you can say the negative thoughts to yourself and react to them then you should be able to say the opposite and get a positive reaction......

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And your solution is SOOO much better, Darth, because it leaves you feeling suicidal and sick?

Yeaaahhh....I can see why you would think positive thinking is a BAD thing.

Everything is about tricking yourself. Big deal. The question is - do you want your illusion to make you hate yourself, or help you feel better?

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The truth is not an illusion. But thinking that you are something you're not is a lie. I'm ugly and stupid. I can't pretend that I'm actually attractive and smart because I know it's not true. One is a lie, the other is reality. As much as I don't want to know that, there's no denying it.

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You sound just like a friend of mine. You sure you're name isn't Geoff? tongue.gif

There are lots of things I'd rather not know, but that I do.

And there are lots of things I DON'T know but I hope to, someday.

Guess it all depends on what you want and how you plan on getting it. If you've already decided you ain't getting it, well, then it's kind of pointless to WANT it.

But that's not very helpful, either. Goodness, it's almost 3 AM and I'm still awake. That might be part of it.

The truth of the matter for me is that someone with my kind of life experiences (childhood abuse, beatings, abandoment, rape, personal drug history, psychiatric ward stays, etc etc) SHOULD be that I would be a broken person. Unable to hold healthy happy relationships. Unable to hold down a job.

Hell, with my life, stastically - I should either have killed myself or still be on drugs.

But I'm not. I'm steady a decent job, good relationship, decent self-image, yadda yadda yadda.

The truth of what should be and what is are often different. But not always in a bad way.

Of course, you are speaking with an eternal optimist, Darth. smile.gif

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You stated that there is medicine to clear up any kind of acne. Is there really anything that will clear up cysts other than Accutane?

On a different note. I respect you Elsewhere. It sounds like you have been through it all and come out an optimist. That is not that easy to do. I am having a hard time being positive right now myself. I have never had acne this bad in my life and the scarring is just as bad. I pray every day for a miracle and pray that I can learn to accept my circumstance. That is all I can do. I continue searching for answers, like all of us. I am thankful that there is a website that links us together because I feel very alone with this as I am sure many of you are. I've been to several doctors for answers and they really haven't been all that helpful. They look only on there terms and don't really want to see the big picture. I am very disappointed in the medical community. I think that I have learned more and gained more knowledge just reading these posts. I think the doctors need to read what is really going on!!!!

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acne def has had an emotional toll on my confidence here and there in my life when its bad....i go through periods of no breaking out to periods of breaking out bad with cysts.....but what ive learned is that we are the ones that are causing us our termoil in our minds....we are the ones judging ourselves.....we dont know what others are thinking and we certainly cant control what they think.....stop looking in the mirror so much...everytime you do it your judging yourself good or bad based on your appearance.....acne is what it is....but we are the ones putting the negative judgement on it.........do you what you can to clear it, but judging yourself certainly isnt going to help.......i read that some of you guys hate looking into peoples eyes...thats the worst thing to do...if you do that, you will never get past the fear of being judged...try looking into their eyes and letting them see who you are not just what your appearance might be that day....i bet no one but yourself is actually judging you as harsh as yourself...and they certainly dont obsesively focus on only the zits on your face like you do....i mean think about it, when you see someone with acne you might notice it, but do you really care.....do you realy give a F that this person you dont know has some acne....and then reverse it...does the pubic really give a F that you have some acne....we only have one life right now, stop wasting it because of WHAT YOU ASSUME others think of you......so stop judging yourself.........one thing i do everytime i have a negative thought about myself in my head is say to myself......I AM BEAUTIFUL AND CONFIDENT....despite what you think of acne, it is a great teacher.....stop pitying yourself and learn how to bring your inner personality and confidence out....instead of focusing and blaming your outter appearance...ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANT CONTROL AND HAVE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE WHAT YOU CAN, which is your inner confidence and attitude....

Who knows why we have acne...but eveything happens for a reason...and just maybe you can learn from it...it teaches you how to:

1) Stop being so vane

2) Be more compasionate towards others, acne related or not..

3) Stop judging others based on appearance

4) To accept the things you cant totally control

5) Better your inner qualities

6) Love yourself regardless of your outside PERCIEVED inperfections..

I could go on and on...I def get the acne blues here and there....but if i had acne all my life...I WOULD MUCH RATHER GO ON WITH LIFE ACCEPTING IT AND BEING CARE FREE ABOUT IT, THAN LIVING IN THE SHADOWS AND WITHDRAWING FROM LIFE...and plus, stressing about it just makes it worse...

1) Force yourself to stop looking in the mirror unless you have to, its not going to make it go away.

2) Try to do things that take your mind away from it

3) Remember that you are the one judging yourself...if you are your own worst critic, try being your own best critic..

4) Take it into perspective.....IF acne is the worst thing that has happened to you, than consider yourself very lucky....there are millions of others that are inflicted by much worse things than acne...

5) "YOU" are not the skin on your face, back or wherever....thats not what makes you as a person..

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